I Forgive but Never Forget

I forgive you

When someone does me wrong, I usually have no problem forgiving them because I don't like carry grudges if only makes me feel bad and really does nothing to help the situation. If someone never ask for forgiveness I almost always tell them that I for give them and let them know I only give them one chance and if they do it again they are no longer my friend or in my life. No some people like relatives and family friends you have to deal with them no matter what.

One thing to always remember any time you forgive someone don't forget what they did. If you forget what they did to you then you will never forgive yourself for letting them do it again and they will if you forget. So remember it OK to forgive but its not OK to forget.

Temple of Forgiveness

Photo by: http://flickr.com/photos/mod_complex/
Photo by: http://flickr.com/photos/mod_complex/

Forgiving Family

Usually for family I still forgive them but I do not deal with them during family functions. I say hi to them and then pretty much avoid them as much as possible during the family function. I don't tell everyone else in the family our business because it only makes the whole thing a lot bigger than it needs to be. Hopefully I will get an apology or something. If not I just do not deal with those family members except when forced to for a family function. There is no reason to make everyone else suffer for what another family member has done. Of course there are different degrees of what someone has done and somethings take longer to forgive but I do my best to forgive as soon as I can because like I said it only hurts me when I am angry.

Forgiving Friends

Now when a friend does something to me that needs forgiveness, I pretty much tell them straight out that they have done me wrong and If they still want to be friends, i would expect an apology or something to let me know that they are sorry. If they been a friend for a long time its a little harder to keep them from being friends without and apology. But usually I am good at picking friends and most of my friends have never done be wrong at least not on purpose.

Forgiving Someone your in a Relationship With.

Its hard when someone in a relationship does you wrong specially if you have been romantically involved with them. You have to figure out why they did it and if its worth continuing the relationship. Now if you are married then you have not much of a choice but to resolve the issue. I know some issues just cant be resolved and you got to consider if you need to separate or get a divorce or something. If you have kids it even gets a lot harder. You just got to hope you get an apology or something from you significant other buy still find a way to forgive them so it does not eat you up inside.

Forgiving People You Work With

Sometimes a co-worker is going to do something wrong to you and its hard to face people you work with that have done you wrong. You have to figure some way to get along with them. You might just have to confront them and let them know that they have done you wrong and hopefully they will apologize and you can get back to work and not forgive them. You want a job that you are happy to go to everyday. Lucky for me I enjoy my job and so far no-one has done me wrong yet, at-least that i am aware.

Forgiving People You don't even know

You sometimes have to find a way to forgive someone that you don't even know that's done you wrong. It can happen at a store, on the road or even a party. People can be cruel ore not caring. Some people are just rude and run over people in their way. i usually get mad when things happen to me from someone I don't know. Since I hope to never see them again I can forgive them and get on with me life.

Forgive and Forget Song

Never Forget

Remember to Always try to forgive someone and try to work out your differences but never forget what someone has done or it will come back and get you someday. Some people you just have to forget them completely. Others that you have to deal with forgive them and do not let it get to you or you will never forgive them. If you want to be happy you can't worry about anything that's why you have to to forgive. Its really for you and not the other person.

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Forgive and Never Forget Comments 24 comments

stephhicks68 profile image

stephhicks68 8 years ago from Bend, Oregon

You did an excellent job covering a difficult subject. I especially like how you broke it out into different areas.


kia31 profile image

kia31 8 years ago from Los Angles Author

Thanks Stephen, I just wrote about it they way I felt about it, forgiving is not easy but its very necessary.


premsingh profile image

premsingh 8 years ago

good job. A complicated issue dealt with ease.


kia31 profile image

kia31 8 years ago from Los Angles Author

Yes Very Complicated but everybody has to deal with forgiving sometime. Thanks for the feedback Premsingh


MorganaMontgomery profile image

MorganaMontgomery 8 years ago from Concord, CA, USA

Nice article. I especially like the way you broke it down into segments. I have to agree a lot with what you said: "Forgive but not forget", and that it only harms me if I cannot forgive. This is a touchy subject, but I think you opinioned it quite well. I also appreciate all the referrence materials as suggested reading.

Nicely done!


torino70 profile image

torino70 8 years ago from Pueblo, Colorado

Forgiving is something we all need to practice?


kia31 profile image

kia31 8 years ago from Los Angles Author

Yes we should, I guess its just harder for some to forgive then others. But we all have to start somewhere.


torino70 profile image

torino70 8 years ago from Pueblo, Colorado

Very well said.


kia31 profile image

kia31 7 years ago from Los Angles Author

Thanks Torino70, its just the way I feel.


Joe610 7 years ago

If you don't forget, then you haven't forgiven. True forgiveness is like true love - unconditional.


kia31 profile image

kia31 7 years ago from Los Angles Author

Joe, I not sure I really never forget anything does that mean I have never forgiven. I have to think about your statement.


MattUSAF2525 profile image

MattUSAF2525 7 years ago

I've never understood why you "have to forgive" someone, for doing you wrong. Why should it then be up to me, to give the person who hurt me, the right to feel good about what they did to me? It's like if i were to punch every person on this earth in the face, then ask them to forgive me.

Now lets say they've forgiven me. So not only did i just punch every person on earth in the face and hurt them, but then I ask them to no longer hate me, but forgive me.

Seems like the offender gets to do whatever they want, with no worries. Screw that.


kia31 profile image

kia31 7 years ago from Los Angles Author

Matt, You do not have to forgive anyone if you do not want to but, do not let what was done to you hurt you, forgiving them can help you more than it helps them. What I me about not forgetting is to rember what they did no if they punched you then I would simply stay away from that person or find me a body guard. But I not going to let them do it to me again now way.


blaise25 profile image

blaise25 6 years ago from close to you...

I think you can never be happy completely if you wont forgive...

this is a nice written hub. thanks for sharing ;p


dreamer32 profile image

dreamer32 6 years ago from Mississippi

I agree with everything what you said, but most people make this isssue out of an arguement or a debate. Especailly with family, those are the worst! I beleive when a person has been hurt so much by someone for years that it's impossible to forget the memories, but it's possible to forgive!Very well written hub! I wrote something similiar on the same thing! Feel free to visit my blog at http://enlightened32.blogspot.com/.


Gigi2 profile image

Gigi2 6 years ago from UK

Very glad to have found you. I found forgiving very healing, but I have learnt it is wise to remember. Self preservation is dependent on it. Thank you for a moving hub. I have just written about my experiences in forgiving. I still hurt at times, but I am happier for moving on.


Stacy Barber profile image

Stacy Barber 6 years ago

Forgiveness can sometimes be a bitter pill to swallow but it's what I was taught as a child to do. There are so many levels to forgiveness (forgiveness for getting the wrong toppings on your sundae to forgiveness for being dumped by your ex). Each time we must forgive, we must also look deep within ourselves to see if we somehow have been at fault. Sometimes the hardest type of forgiveness is that you give yourself.

Good hub!


kia31 profile image

kia31 6 years ago from Los Angles Author

Stacy, thanks for your comments and I agree that forgiving yourself can be the hardest type to forgive, at least for me.


WordNLipsAffair profile image

WordNLipsAffair 6 years ago

Forgiving is easy at times but we tend to never forget...well that may just be me!


kia31 profile image

kia31 6 years ago from Los Angles Author

WorldNlipsAffair, thats nots just you it lot of people feel just like, thanks for sharing


CarolineVABC profile image

CarolineVABC 5 years ago from Castaic

Thank you, kia31, for sharing this! It is true that sometimes, it can be difficult to forget what was done to you, but it is also good not to forget the "lesson learned." Sometimes, without realizing, we do take part in encouraging the behavior of others, which can be very difficult to fathom. Also, I loved your article and the way you broke it down-very straight forward and there's a lot of truth in it!!! Thank you for sharing this. Keep up the good work and may you have a better 2011 with HubPages!:-)


WtfDude 5 years ago

I forgive you for being so terrible at spelling and grammar.


Anon 4 years ago

You would think that you could at least have read over it or put it through spell check or something. Your entire message was lost to me because of how horrible your spelling and grammar was. So bad it seems, that I felt the need to comment on a three year old post.


Mrs.frankie ramdayal 4 years ago

Yeah ..forgiving & Not forgetting :is ok.

But often, people who've been forgiven, come right back to us- to probably do the same things we'd stopped trusting them for.

& Sometimes, just sometimes, we want to take them back in our lives. They say they've changed...& we feel the need to believe them-for the sake of just getting along.

It would be definitely better to let go & forget all of it..Rather than sticking on to past differences.

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