Go From Boring Lay to 50 Shades of Foreplay!

Spice it up

Spice it up with Stilettos
Spice it up with Stilettos | Source

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

When I was younger, I found myself always worrying about things and fixating on trivial stuff that now seem so unimportant. Even though I weighed a meek 120 pounds, I worried about my weight, and if the guy I was with noticed my thick thighs, or the zit on my cheek like I did. I worried about my makeup being perfect and if my date approved of it and things like that.

What I Look For In A Man

What do I look for in a man? Although it’s not complicated, it is something many men do not fulfill. I have discovered many men have little to no imagination because they get fixated on just one thing…taking care of their own needs.

In my world, there are no boundaries behind closed doors. Not as of yet, anyways. I am a sensual woman, in my mid-forties and I've become comfortable in my skin, with and without attire. Although this has not always been the case.

Bringing Sexy Back

Bringing Sexy Back
Bringing Sexy Back | Source

Five Important Key Points

I learned these things were really unimportant for 5 important reasons:

1. - Most men simply do not notice these things.

2. - They do not fixate on our flaws like we, ourselves do.

3. - Men tend to appreciate us simply because we are women, and that is the beauty of the opposite gender.

4. - Men are simple creatures, for the most part, and they will tell us what they like and do not like without any code.

5. - What they say really is what they mean.

Guiding Your Partner

With this knowledge, I have become more comfortable with guiding a man by teaching him exactly what I like in order to be happy. And this is such an important element, in order to become satisfied and fulfilled in your relationship.

What I like is uncomplicated, yet many men are oblivious to my needs. I have noticed most guys just want to be done with themselves, and once they think I've had the big "O", they finish up, and then ask for praise. What they don't realize is that I need more…much more.

Playing Pretend

Play Sheena's way
Play Sheena's way | Source

Role Play, Not So Risque'

I am the type of woman who likes to go out of my head into a role playing world. So, standard stuff is inadequate, and highly unfulfilling.

I have had more than my share of the “missionary man”. I appreciate a man who isn’t in a hurry when romancing me, but instead I prefer one who likes creativity, with an exploratory edge. I like to play dress up and make an entrance for my man. I find just the anticipation of me sauntering into the room tends to get a man's interest and attention. I like to prepare a man for me, without too much physical work on my part. It is very important to know that intimacy when done properly really is 50% physical and 50% mental. One of the key elements of the actual act is to get inside a man’s head with mental stimulation. The imagination can be such a turn-on for anyone.

Bringing Sexy Back

Getting ready for intimacy makes it much more enjoyable for both of us, and once a guy figures this out, then he too appreciates my eye for the finer details.. If I'm lucky, the man will offer to go shopping for fun clothes and such, before our next date!

I like to play out scenarios….fantasy….and full on exploration for him and for me. I hate being in charge, and can’t stand a boy who is unsure of himself. Men need to learn how to “man up” and take the situation by the reigns. No pansies are allowed in my playground.! I'm not talking about going overboard like leather or chains, although I'm not opposed to dressing up in hot clothing. I believe every woman should be a lady in public and a bad girl in the bedroom with her man.

I am a pleaser, and I am searching for the right balance in a man–a bad boy whos really good to only me ’cause I’m a good girl that’s really bad in the bedroom.

Toys Aren't Just For Kids Anymore

One thing I need to say for myself is how the use of toys really does make things better. They help keep me enthusiastic when going about doing the man a “favor”, and second, they actually prepare me physically for the actual act. I figure it’s a win-win situation.

I used to dread the point when a man would look at me with those puppy dog eyes and point down south in a begging hand gesture. Now, I really enjoy it with the assistance of my little friends. It is just so much more fun when I get to feel good too! (What a concept!)

And I have found that once the guy realizes the benefits of my assistant, he becomes more comfortable with the concept. Some guys initially seem intimidated by this idea because they think they're being replaced. Although in reality, they might be on to something, however that’s not my intention.

This Girl's Got It

This Girl's Got It!
This Girl's Got It! | Source

Having Fun With It

Having Fun With It
Having Fun With It | Source


I appreciate and need a man who takes the reins when it comes to our adventurous escapades. I don't want to have to think, or make decisions. When he tells me to tilt my head back, or arch my back a little more…then I oblige…I like to let the man feel like he is in charge and has complete control over me. Although, most women know who is really in charge.

Adventure Land

Whoever can find the right balance of mental and physical combination when romancing me, will most definitely get the ride of their life.

In a relationship there should be little boundaries, no rules…except one: don’t hold back.

Other key elements? Make each encounter with your partner an experience, not a quick chore. Be creative and willing to explore all options for a better than satisfactory experience and you’ll find "IT" enjoyable every single time.

© 2013 Helen Kramer

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Comments 7 comments

Man of Strength profile image

Man of Strength 3 years ago from Orlando, Fl

I didn't know HubPages could be risque. Thank goodness I found you! You're awesome.

MissCue profile image

MissCue 3 years ago from Santa Barbara, CA. Author

Hello Man of Strength...Thank you for your kind comment. I do believe I am pushing the hubpage boundaries here. My ads are disabled and I have flashing neon warning signs lit up at the top of my page that are only visible to me...of course. So, I'm thinking if they are only visible to me, do they really exist? I'm going with the "if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, does it make a noise....lol Stay cool!

Man of Strength profile image

Man of Strength 3 years ago from Orlando, Fl

Thanks. Your boldness and use of profanity is so refreshing. I consider all of us artists on here. You're the first Hubber I've known to be so frank. Stay cool as well.

Jodah profile image

Jodah 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

Wow MissCue, you certainly say it as it is, no holds barred. I congratulate you for the courage to write a hub like this, baring your personal 'soul' so to speak. This hub is refreshing, risque and well worth the visit. Well done, look forward to reading much more from you. ps. great to see all your orignal artwork for the images.

MissCue profile image

MissCue 3 years ago from Santa Barbara, CA. Author

Thanks for the awesome reviews, Jodah!!!

mts1098 profile image

mts1098 2 years ago from InsideTheManCave

MissCue - What I enjoyed about this hub is the way you put all your cards on the table - or should I say bed :) You take the guessing game out which is admirable and I have learned to take care of the woman first and good things will happen without the puppy dog eyes. cheers!

MissCue profile image

MissCue 2 years ago from Santa Barbara, CA. Author

My dearest mts1098, you put a smile on my face...Thank you! No more puppy-dog eyes....just a little puppy breath when we wake up in the morning!!!

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