Being Happy with People

Do you agree that many of us make the initial mistake of believing that happiness is something hard to achieve? We wait for a kind of magic to strike and make us happy. When this does not happen, we are resentful, and which little did we know -- is the wrong attitude.

I hope this hub will inspire us!

Nice and Accepting

Being nice is approachable and within means. It is not looking at our own ideals. It is not setting pace for the rest of the world.

Expect good but not too much. Accepting realities teaches the ability to come to terms with one's own life as it really is - not as we imagine it ought to be. This is the best recipe for making success of the little that has been put into one's hands. We can take what is offered by those around us and give at least as much as we receive. These instances can help take us being happy with people.

Happy to Belong

It is most likely to enjoy people if we are prepared to put some of what we possess into a friendship or relationship, regardless of what we get out of it.

Can we do favors readily? Sure, we can help ourselves by helping others, and if possible, let's not look for a way out if somebody asks for a helping hand. Selflessly helping people is a powerful way to feel good. People feel good when they do good.

When plans are being discussed and we put the preferences of others before our own, not showing plainly that we hate having our routine disturbed; we will be included in the program. This initiative will give us the courage to offer. We then are taking part of life's surprises which brings us some of the happiest moments.

One way to seek out connections is to show more conformity to one’s in-group
One way to seek out connections is to show more conformity to one’s in-group

Trying to bring everything around to one's point of view and handle them well, soon will gain us a desirable sensation of "belongingness."

Too "Sensitive"

If we've been told that we're too sensitive, then we probably are. This usually means we may be overly emotional and don't feel sufficiently secure. We need to be careful. If we don't guard against these ill-feelings, people will regard us as a liability.

Going temperamental has a tendency to allow the poison of hurt or anger accumulate inside us which eventually will become a raging inferiority-complex. This state of mind is a drawback to our relationship with people. It leads to nowhere.

It is recommended to turn it around. If we have to disagree with someone, we can say it in a nice way. An effort to understand circumstances helps take responsibility for one's sensitivity. It reminds us that the person probably means no harm. This way, we will learn to manage our feelings before they get out of control.

If you wonder what is being happy with people is - Don't Feel Alone ( A Flickr photo)
If you wonder what is being happy with people is - Don't Feel Alone ( A Flickr photo)

But let's not rush to our fences. It would be perfect to have everybody loving us in five minutes. But this just isn't always possible. We have to build gradually. At the end, we will realize that being firm, clear, constructive and patient, are some of the ways to be happy with people anywhere... anytime.

Proceeding with Caution

Conflicts arise. But taking the long view helps subside the heat. Details tend to magnify that molehills become mountain leading to quarrels. It isn't the big disputes that are the danger - but the little squabblers. Watch it, or it becomes a habit. In fact, men are very cautious about this, they hate emotional scenes and will do anything to avoid one. It only pays not to risk a showdown for a trifle, that we may not hear a lot of unpleasant things about us.

When one disappointment with someone deter us, let's not give in that easy. Let's try again. Trying to think from the other person's position may help us see his emotions and logic. Then we may understand the situation better and may have some other feelings for that person than anger.

Rules to avoid quarrel may be very hard, but it's our only chance to reduce it. If we learn to forgive, we will be happy.

Are you happy with who is around you?
Are you happy with who is around you?

Being with People

Being grateful for the goodness that is already evident in one's life provides a deeper sense of happiness.

Do you find content being around with people no matter who they are? or are you not afraid to take time out to hang or just be? How long has it been since you’ve ‘gone out to play? Why do you invite family and friends over for dinner? Why are you making list for Christmas presents?

I guess you'll agree with me that when someone is important to us, we'll give time for them, and even for just a few minutes, we're much eager to make them a part of us. We don't even have to consider whether or not we’re making them happy because we simply enjoy being with them. Making them happy makes us happy; and the best part of that? Nothing beats the feeling of making a commitment and keeping it with the help of those around us. So being with people makes us happy... and being with the most important people in our life sums us up.

One thing that TRULY makes people happy above anything else is LOVE... or should I say the habit of caring for people around you more than about ourselves. The less we worry about our own and more about the others, the happier with people we will be.

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Comments 22 comments

ALUR profile image

ALUR 5 years ago from USA

Insightful and good steps to achieving balance. I typically have no expectations as I am less likely to be hurt or wounded when people disappoint. I've found extracting my own energy, rather than borrowing it from artificial trinkets or emotional vampires, sustains my peace.

People do need people however to rely on them for happiness is a big mistake. If happiness or at least contentment cannot be from within, the journey to healing will not begin.

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 5 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Thank you Alur. I like that one you said about extracting your own energy. Just an ideal way to beat any of the world's outside forces. If we all do it, there would be more understanding than chaos.

Although I have a strong belief of how people can add happiness to one's life, I too don't agree on relying on them for happiness, not even for the love of my life. He may be there to make me happy, but my happiness doesn't just rely on him, and he knows that :-). Thanks for the engaging insight too. A great thing to ponder upon.

Happy holidays to you!

Richieb799 profile image

Richieb799 5 years ago from Cardiff, Wales UK

Hey, a great uplifting hub, I especially like the picture of the lions! Sorry I stopped following you earlier by mistake, someone followed me and I followed them back and then they stopped following me so I was trying to find out who it was. regards, Richie

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 5 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Haha yes, how would've the big cats enjoyed walking with the lion if not with the thought of being happy with what's around them, :=)funny thought right? Thank you for liking that... No worries, I'm still in your list of followers and happy to have you still following. Thank you Richie. So enjoyed reading your hubs, really. Cheers!

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wwolfs 4 years ago

Tonipet - Another great hub. I, too, agree that you can not rely on others for your happiness and that you would be setting yourself up for disappointment. Happiness has to come from within and I have always felt that you need to become your own best company first. When you feel that happiness within, you find it easier to be by yourself and to choose other people to be around.

The quote, misery loves company, unfortunately, is true and it is always best to avoid this type of person as their only attempts are to make your life unhappy. They only bring stress. Some people make it virtually impossible to be happy around them.

People come with a mixture of emotions. You just know the difference, when you are around someone that really cares, that share understanding and compassion, and their only attempts are to make your life better. They lift you up when you're down. Their very presence can bring calm to an otherwise shaky emotion, or environment, and many times for no reason at all. They just make you feel content. Those are the people to enrich your life with. Those are the people that truly put a smile on your face.

You have provided many great ways to help lead someone to the path of happiness. I want to thank you again for adding my hub to yours. You certainly are a cheerful person and always manage to put a smile on my face. :) I, too, really like the pictures you used. If only everyone could live in peace and harmony.

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 4 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Hello wwolfs. I missed this warm comment, apologies. I like what you said on how people who cares for us in so many ways was simply only to attempt to make our lives better. So true!

Sometimes and busy as we are, we tend to ignore their very presence. Thanks to goodness that also many of those times we realize how these people can bring calm to our emotions, environment, and yes, even for no reason at all. Perhaps it's the wonder of us people. We're here for one another to enrich lives.

Thank you for this. I hope all is well with you. Happy driving!

ishwaryaa22 profile image

ishwaryaa22 4 years ago from Chennai, India

A thoughtful and well-advised hub! My one of hubber-friends told me that happiness should come first from you and then be very happy with people. If we are surrounded by our loved ones, genuinely good-natured friends and well-wishers, nothing beat our happiness with them. Your views are well-presented and clearly stated. Well-done.

P.S. Thank you for bestowing me with an honor of linking my hub to your sensible hub.

Thanks for SHARING. Useful & Interesting. Voted up.

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 4 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Lucky your hubber friend to know what real happiness is... love truly makes people happy. I'm happier that you find my views well-presented and clearly-stated. That's very motivating of you. Great hubs such as yours are worth-sharing and you're always welcome. Thank you for your thoughts and the very nice comment. Take care!

TheRightWord profile image

TheRightWord 4 years ago from Sunny California

"We are most likely to enjoy people if we are prepared to put some of what we possess into a friendship or relationship, regardless of what we get out of it."

SO True. I have used this method to turn around relationships that were seemingly doomed, whether it was a coworker or family member. When you give up the expectation that you will get something back, you get so much more back. Thank you for the uplifting hub.

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 4 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Therightword - Like you said, humor and optimism are a way of life, I too believe there's getting more in expecting less. Sounds difficult but worth all the effort. Thanks for that wisdom, we all needed the right words :=) Lovely name. Thank you for the inspiring words.

Injured lamb profile image

Injured lamb 4 years ago

Thanks Tonette for sharing with us such a thought provoking really gives me some deep thoughts...

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 4 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Always welcome lamb. There is nothing like giving yourself for others, you will find so much joy in seeing them happy. Now it makes me happy to know this gives you some deep thoughts. Happy days and be happy with people always:=) Thanks for reading.

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oceansider 4 years ago

Hi Tonipet, Thank you for this great article and what you said in it, about putting others first, for being patient, I agree with, and this is what Jesus Christ wants us to do, to love others, as you have said!

May God bless you and take care! Helen

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 4 years ago from The City of Generals Author

My dear Helen - truly only through JESUS that we can put others before us first, for only through HIS blessings that we can do it truthfully with joy right from the heart. Your words are so encouraging. Thank you for that, too. Blessings as well.

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oceansider 4 years ago

Yes, tonipet, we can only love others and put them first, with the love of Jesus, definitely! Take care, glad my words were encouraging.

Olde Cashmere profile image

Olde Cashmere 4 years ago from Michigan, United States

This is a beautiful hub and I admire you for putting together such powerful words. Voted up, useful, awesome, and beautiful :)

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 4 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Olde Cashmere - I should say those words are a reflection of being among wonderful people. It makes us do things with joy. Glad to be among all of you. Best wishes James and thank you.

Karson 2 years ago

It's always a relief when someone with obvious exsretipe answers. Thanks!

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 2 years ago from The City of Generals Author

Very much welcome, Karson. We all learn from one another. Thanks for reading and may your days be happy... MERRY CHRISTMAS!:=)

Patty 2 years ago

You are so awesome for helping me solve this mytersy.

Patty 2 years ago

You are so awesome for helping me solve this mytersy.

Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 12 months ago from The City of Generals Author

HI Patty. We live in the world full of mysteries. At those times we're uncertain, there are only two choices we have -- to be confused or not.... Me? I'd choose not to be confused, lol. I got this advice from a monk who said one way to be happy is to understand that nothing is perfect , no one is perfect. I bet that's mystery solved! So glad the article has helped you! Hugs! -Tonette

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