"Honey, Was it Something I Said or Thought?"
- A faux pas is a socially awkward or tactless act, especially one that violates accepted social norms, standard customs, or the rules of etiquette. The expression faux pas comes from French, where it means "false step", "misstep" (in a physical
Source: Wikipedia Free Encyclopedia
Chaos always has a small origin
It all started so innocently. A loving-couple was just sitting quietly enjoying each other's company and the male part of the couple was gazing intently into his gorgeous girlfriend's blue eyes and enjoying the sight of her hair gently falling now and then over her eyes. And she was also enjoying his total-attention. Things were perfect.
A few minutes passed. Then "Natalie," broke the silence by asking, "Lowell, am I as pretty as 'Genny,' your 'ex?" Poor "Lowell," his mind had wandered (like men's minds do) to the mental replay of the last minute of Super Bowl 49, and the very moment that Russell Wilson, quarterback of the Seahawks released the ball to pass to a receiver and what "Lowell" said, "not hardly," and that was exactly how he answered his girlfriend's question. Verbatim.
"Lowell" sees a scary change in "Genny"
"Genny's" eyes went from a sensual blue, to a fiery, Hellish fire and brimstone red and she began to tremble with anger as she said, "Not hardly?" "Is that what you said, 'not hardly?" Her voice cut his Super Bowl fantasy in two as easily as a Los Angeles gang leader's switchblade would cut through a stack of vanilla ice cream.
"Lowell," the poor guy, was busted and I mean busted to such a point of guilt that he would call Perry Mason if he existed.
"Gen," that is, uhhh, not what I meant! I was thinking about the Super Bowl last Sunday, and uhh, your question just came at the wrong time," he stammered to explain.
Proof that a man's plans sometimes hurts his love life
Things caused in relationships by men not thinking before speaking
"Lowell" gets in deeper
"Oh, not only did you screw-up my question, but you were thinking of the Super Bowl instead of ME?" She bellowed to a now-beaten-down "Lowell," soon to be her "ex."
Obviously, nothing "Lowell," could do or say would appease "Genny," so they agreed to call it quits and part as people who made a huge mistake in dating for three years. What a nasty scene. How bad and hurt, poor "Lowell," felt as he watched "Genny" fade out of sight.
Oh, if "Lowell," had just gotten his hands on this hub entitled--
"Honey, Was it Something I Said or Thought?"
(I will name the scene first. And then tell you what (a) distant, unfocused guy is thinking about or says without really thinking about it).
Girl: "Honey, do you like my eggs this morning?" Guy: "Gail has such pretty legs." "Gail' just happens to be his girlriends best friend.
Girl: "I don't think my mother believes in the devil." Guy: "Yeah, she is surely the devil."
Girl: "I am worried about "Shana," my sorority sister. I think she may be gay." Guy: "I am not judging your sister even if she is gay."
Girl: "Honey, I appreciate your losing weight for me." Guy: "Oh, are you losing weight?'
Girl: "Does this skirt make my butt look fat?" "Fat thighs? I don't think your thighs are fat."
Girl: "Are you really over your "ex?" Guy: "Why do you want to be my "ex?"
Girl: "Someone told me you said my parents were fools." Guy: "I never said they sold pools."
Girl: "When we marry, can I keep "Tipsy," my poodle in the house?" Guy: "Why not? You are staying in the house."
Girl: "Why didn't you 'clean 'Tom's' clock for making a pass at me?" Guy: "Mistakes happen."
Girl: "What did you mean by 'I like her pair,' when you talked in your sleep last night?" Guy: "I said that 'I liked her hair."
Girl: "Before we get married, I want to be honest with you and let you know that I am not much of a cook." Guy: "Honey, I am not here to argue with you."
Girl: "Does this wart on my cheek bother you?" Guy: "No, I do not want us to part."
And finally . . .
Girl: "Would like for me to stop asking questions?" Guy: "Sure, sweetie. I like you a lot."
Note: Guys, let this piece be a lesson for you. Think before you speak. It's as simple as that.
This guy 'thought' his funny plan would get some laughs
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