How Cubs Rate Cougars

Surprise!! Men like to rate things

Well, lo and behold, the cubs have their own rating system for us cougars. I know women hate to be rated, but let's face it ladies, that's what men do. Furthermore, we have our rating system, but we try to be more discreet about it and often disguise it some emotional explanation. Let's get real. We have deal breakers that are sometimes more arbitrary than those men have.


However, I digress. We are now talking about the male perspective only. I will make a traditional list as they do from A to AAA+++ at the conclusion, but I found the subtleties of their rankings to be to important to ignore. Therefore I didn't want to only make it a crass list with firm designations. It appears there are a group of factors that push you up or down the list so there is not hard and fast definition of each category. The factors are as follows:

Does she hide you or sneak around with you? The more open she is the higher she rates. This can have a direct correlation to whether she is married, but not limited to that. She could be embarrassed, has disapproving children, jealous exes etc.

Does she have time or can make time for you easily? The more flexible she is, the better. Men don't want to have be required to spend a lot of time with you, but they want you to be available when they chose and for however long they chose. The more able you are to accommodate that perfect world of theirs, the higher she ranks. This is probably the most important factor for most. If she can get a babysitter at the drop of a hat when he calls and isn't working (doesn't have a curfew) or better yet is an ex-trophy wife with lots of money and time, we're talking AAA.

Is she beautiful and/or fit? Obviously more is better here as well.

Does she have money? Do I actually have to explain that one?

Does she have children? Actually not as important as you might think as long as she has a babysitter on speed dial or they're old enough that they don't live at home. Bottom-line, as long as she'll drop everything at the drop of a hat and can stay up all night with you if it happens to go that way, Great.

Is she smart? The smarter - the better.

Is she funny? Humor is important. That goes for both sexes.

Does she allow an open relationship? No Strings Attached? Something all men hope they can have at the beginning. Unless the cub is looking for a long term relationship which is rarely the case at first, the ranking goes way up.

Sexually adventurous? Ah come on, you know the answer to that one..... We're all grown ups here.

Confident? Definitely a plus and almost a requirement for being a cougar.

Successful in her own right? Success is a big turn on.

High Maintenance? If she is needy, self absorbed, high drama, discusses past relationships or talks to much in general then she loses value very quickly. Any of the above can become deal breakers in and of themselves. I'm sure many men can add to this description endlessly.

Nag about wanting to see them more or want a commitment? God forbid. You can drop on the rating scale quicker than the Dow Jones ticker during Sept. 2008.

Needs to bring her kids to his outings? Do that once to many times and you will find your calls being screened.

All the above factors are based on how they contribute to the FUN factor. Impede the fun = deal breaker.

I've been told by the 100's of cubs I've interviewed, it's about fun, don't treat them like they are your girlfriend, that would entail giving them to much information. It's the mystery that sets a good cougar apart. Don't ruin it by trying to make them your confidant,

There are obvious AAAs, but any big deficits in the above categories can pull you down, and vice versa. To satisfy the male need to see a neat definition, I submit the following list"

A
A single or married cougar who can support herself, probably average looking to good looking, who has many family or work commitments that limit spur of the moment plans with whom the cub has a friends with benefits or more relationship.

AA
A single/married cougar who is very successful, who can mentor, teach and guide a cub, who's great company and perhaps can even support him financially, if necessary. She is readily available for a good time most of the time, but not always. Looks can range from average to good looking.

AAA
A single woman who has money, doesn't work, has time, is flexible, confident, is open, adventurous, funny, fun to be around and beautiful - The all around perfect woman.

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13 comments

superb 4 years ago

All my life, I have dated and married older men then after my divorce, I'd became a cougar and never looked back. My current cub is 24 and I am 53 and I am fit and look good therefore, I have no problem with our age differences nor being seen in public with my cub.


UtopiaLifeSteve 5 years ago

Great post! I'd have to agree about the being financially supported thing. Completely emasculating for any man with any amount of self respect.


MermaidMoney profile image

MermaidMoney 5 years ago from Detroit, Michigan

Here I am... a AAA cougar... waiting for my hott cub! :P

I don't need to work, don't have a job but I am working on my Master's Degree and perfecting my writing skills, starting to travel, learning photography, things I couldn't do when younger... A cougar that has goals & ambition is hott too for cubs I have noticed.

Thank you for this article, it was awesome!

Although I don't agree with the idea that a cougar has to support her cub financially, it is emasculating to say the least for a man to be financially helped by a woman. At least in my experience.

Being older, wiser, independent and financially stable gives a woman a huge leg up in the relationship (yes pun fully intended...purrrrrr.... lol) so a younger man needs to have a couple things to bring to the table also in order to feel like a real man and keep the balance of power at an equilibrium.


Bernard Anderson 6 years ago

I also agree with R3dcougar. Preconceived standards are not as important as who you encounter in an actual environment.


GmaGoldie profile image

GmaGoldie 6 years ago from Madison, Wisconsin

Fascinating! R3dcougar is right - chemistry. The aura of the person I could never read but the warmth is the key.


R3dcougar profile image

R3dcougar 6 years ago from Ireland

I think when we have the opportunity, we all tend to rate things in an objective sort of way - but when we are actually face to face with someone, its all about chemistry. Older, younger, taller, shorter, whatever - all of the rating systems go out the window and it gets down to pure attraction. Its either there or it ain't.

And hopefully all my cubs consider me triple A! ;)


Al Bell 6 years ago

I think the cougar thing is blown out of proportion. Young women and men are considered hot because they usually are fit, appear to be sexually ready, and in many instances naive. That has been a turn on to both men and women since the dawn of time. It is no secret and it's nothing new. In the 1960's with the advent of the pill and the new sexual revolution people began to explore sex a lot. (hah, it was great.) Older women, younger women, any woman...Any port in a storm woman... Nothing new, but it's fun to talk about. On a scale of 1 to 10 I'd give you a firm 10 or is that a AAA?


Linsi V 6 years ago

I married a man 9 yrs younger and it lasted 20 years, the final 11 of which were celibate ... once all the kids were born, I was basically treated like a mother ... and you don't have sex with your mother, do you !!! But I have to add that Iknow for sure he was never unfaithful, so the no-sex thing was his problem, which ultimately became mine too .... I had to leave the marriage in the end because that side of things were/are important to me.

Not trying to make a point here - just relaying my experience of an older woman/younger man relationship.

I still get plenty of attention from younger men ... and yes, I quite like it !!! ;o)


amie 7 years ago

i was married, still am, to a cub ,14 years younger than me. age not totally a big issue as i look younger than i am, luckily, but no, now i think i should have had someone closer to my age, yet he cheated with a woman my age! go figure


Steven Scott 7 years ago

The Cougar-Cub dynamic is interesting to read about. I'm sure that nothing is every 100% true for everyone, but this is an interesting point of view.


IsabellaRothchild profile image

IsabellaRothchild 7 years ago from Orlando, FL Author

I promise to tackle that topic soon. Good point.


Monica Grant 7 years ago

Finding a "AAA" Cougar is probably as tough as finding an "AAA" cub! Is there a rating system for Cubs?


Incognito030707 profile image

Incognito030707 7 years ago

I'm surprised that no one has commented on this yet. Well I'm not sure about you or anyone else reading this, but I don't live in a perfect world and would never expect to find a "AAA" cougar. Also, the so called "AAA" cougar has money, but no job. I don't think that being jobless is such a good thing for anyone. When we aren't busy we're bored, and boredom can cause us to do any number of things against our better judgement. I can't say that I'd want anyone to support me financially either. Part of being a man is making your own way in life and standing on your own two feet. Also, while being available on short notice is great, it shouldn't inconvenience your cougar. We're all human, and I know that I wouldn't want to be penalized just because someone else wanted me to be available when I couldn't be. Those are just my thoughts though.

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