How I Would Date Right Now, "If" I Could

WRITER'S NOTE: this hub was was inspired by one of my new followers, susiebrown48, one of the most-talented writers to grace the coverage areas of HubPages. I promised her that if this hub were written, that she would receive the credit. So I am doing that. "Thank you, Susie." Kenneth)

This is whom I would feel like

Albert, who owns an antique shop, if "I" were to date a lady at this stage of my life.
Albert, who owns an antique shop, if "I" were to date a lady at this stage of my life.

Candlelight dinners are very important to me

BECAUSE IT GIVES ME THE PRECIOUS TIME

to listen to, hang onto, and savor each word my date says. And having a candlelight dinner also provides me with another important pleasure: getting to soak myself in the loveliness of my date's eyes. That is the greatest turn-on in the world to me, getting to look deep into her eyes as she talks about her interests, likes, dislikes, favorite flower and music.

Story begins underneath this photo.


I am not like most men. But then again, most men say that "they" are not like most men. At least "I" know myself better than these guys who just "say" they are unique to make precious points with the ladies. Not that I am boasting.


I dare to confess here, right now, in front of God and everyone, that "I" didn't what what society calls a "fiery track record," with the ladies when I was available. Nor did I have numerous notches carved on the headboard of my bed. That is not to say that I didn't have some of "those" dates that a man cherishes for life. Even though just in memory. I used to wish I had been born a Latino for these guys know how to "really" make a girl happy.


At my age now, 58, my dating is over. Finished. Put to bed. Ancient history. The bad part that consists of being called a "fool," "idiot," several times for just trying to talk to the pretty girls who had this addiction of embarrassing me in public. And things like, "what? Me date you?" "sorry, I thought you were another guy when I gave you my number after Math class today," I am thanking God that these wicked lines will never be heard by my ears on this earth again.

Story continued underneath photo below.


Yes, I am old fashioned. I love walks on the beach

ESPECIALLY AT SUNSET

I love holding the soft hand of my date as we listen to the breaking of the waves and take our time to get to know each other and share our most-intimate secrets.

I am married to a nice woman, Pam, who would chop my head off if she only knew that I am publishing her name in this story, but why not give credit (and medals for heroism), to people who do great things? She has managed, with the grace of Our Heavenly Father, and relying on the patience that her dad passed on to her, to "tolerate" me for 37 years. That is some kind of a record, folks.


I will not talk about all of our bad times because one-hundred percent of them were my fault. Not hers. So there. I have made it public. I guess that tomorrow I will feel better at knowing all of HubPages (staff included), will know all about my marriage. No phone calls, please.


Now going with a statement that susiebrown48 made to me today, August 14, I want to go "Saw" on you, like the horror movie where people are told, "let's play a game," by this jerky-looking marionette riding a tricycle.

Story continued underneath photo below.

Sitting close together on a park bench

IS A THING THAT I REALLY LOVE

And it really doesn't have to be a park bench. Maybe my date and I could sit close in a porch swing and just talk ever now and then, because just us "being together," enjoying the precence of each other's voices, laughter, is just fine by me.

The game is this. If my wife, say, were to go to Heaven, right now, and be by Jesus' side, that would of course, make me severely-depressed. More than I am now.


Yes, I would spend days, weeks, months and years trying to grasp my life without Pam. And now even as I am writing this, I shudder in my shoes. Simply put. I cannot live without my companion. Plain and simple. That's all there is to it.


Let's also pretend that I am now 59. Single again. Living alone. Financially-set. But doggone it, so lonely that I talk to the television even when it's off.


I phone up the telephone operators to ask the time and how is her day going? I even call the Crisis Line so much that they call me by name, not a "Joe," "Bill," or "Mack." I am that lonely.


Then one day, just by the will of God and His mercy, I am walking into my local post office to get my "old man" mail that consists of flyers with coupons on them telling how much I can save on "dry bowel" medicines along with new and improved funeral from a new age funeral business in Idaho called, "Drive-Thru Funerals," oh, sorry to see Kenneth go, and can I get a Coke with that statement of respect?


Into the trash can they all go.


Just as I head for the door, a woman looking at her cell phone bumps into me accidentally. I don't mind. This is the first contact I've had with a female since Pam went to talk with Jesus.
"so sorry. Forgive me. I am so clumsy," this very-pretty lady of, say, 32, says to me revealing her perfect teeth.


"wow, I mean, no sweat. I am not hurt that much," I reply and we both laugh.
"my name's "Sherry Tidwell." I am proud to meet you," "Sherry" says very gentile revealing her extra-long eyelashes.
"Kenneth Avery is my tag, and likewise. A pure pleasure to meet someone as pretty as you," I say with confidence and hey, why not? If she doesn't respond, fine. If she does. Fine. Either way, I'm still a widower.

Hi. Guess what? Story continued underneath photo below.

Why not serenade my date with guitar music?

AND SO WHAT IF I AM NOT THAT GOOD ON THE STRINGS?

It really doesn't matter that much to my date, because she knows that this gesture is from my heart and designed just for her. I have learned over my 58 years that women love for men to be "from the heart," especially with romantic things. That is why I would buy a good, used guitar and learn the chords and lyrics from "Only you," by the Platters to tell my date just how I feel.

"Sherry," blushes momentarily and replies, "aww, that's so sweet. Thank you."


"you're very welcome," I reply with my blush now fading away.


"well, I got some more errands to run. Be seeing you," "Sherry," says as she smiles "that" smile and gracefully walks toward the door which I, as an old-fashioned gentleman, open for her.


Again she smiles. And says, "thanks again, Kenneth. Have a nice day and I hope we run into each other again."


I stand motionless for a few minutes. And dwell on her last remark. Was that her way of "wanting" to see me again or just her being nice, I think over and over. Finally I give up. I am not a mind analyst that our beloved C.I.A. employs.


Days pass. Then two weeks pass. I am now more lonely than ever, but do not confess this fact to my daughter or grandchildren who are very worried about me. How do I know this? They call me at least five times a day asking the same question, "are you doing okay?" "Sure! Top of the world," I reply lying through my teeth, but why add my burden to their load?


On one certain Wednesday, I have to go back to the post office to mail a payment for something I bought, but can't remember what it was. But these "blood suckers" are threating me over the phone for their money, so I am going to do the right thing and send them five dollars. I am not a dead beat.


When I get out of my car with my five-dollar payment in my hand and proceed to the front door of the post office, there "she" is, "Sherry Tidwell," looking like she has just stepped off the front page of Vogue magazine.


She is dressed "to the nine's" with a nice summer dress, heels, and a pearl necklace that catches my attention. Part of me wants to stay back out of sight and let her get her business concluded, while another part of me is screaming, "get in there, doofus! You may not get this chance again."


The second voice won out. I walk into the post office and I can tell that "Sherry" is not far away, from the perfume she wears, "Diamonds, by Liz Taylor," one of my favorites. My "late" wife once wore this scent when we both were younger.


"Kenneth, how are you?" "Sherry" asks almost running up to me.


"uhh, great! Right now," I reply instinctively.


"Sherry," picks up on the meaning of my "right now," knowing I feel good at seeing her, and she blushes. I feel good knowing at my age that I can still cause a pretty lady to blush.


"what have you been up to? Haven't seen you around," she asks looking over her mail.


"ahhh, just the usual, living a day at the time, writing hubs for HubPages, and other things," I reply hoping to capture her interest.


"sounds nice . . .oh, what's HubPages?" she asks wide-eyed, and her eyes are very beautiful--deep, brown and very inviting.


"it's a website where people write stories and publish them with photos. It's a great website and it helps me to deal with the passing of my wife," I explain.


"Sherry" looks solemn now. "oh, Kenneth, I didn't know. I am so sorry," she says in a voice so soft that I get chills up my spine.


"that's fine, "Sherry." thank you. I am dealing with it," I reply stuttering more with my next question.


"uhhh, care to get a cup of coffee?" I ask with my heart racing like Dale Earnhardt's number 88 Spring Cup car.


"Sherry" glances at her watch. Then says, "sure, why not? I don't have to work today. Where do you want to go?" she asks.


We end up at this small "mom and pop" restaurant just outside of our hometown. The atmosphere is quiet, easy to think. Talking is easy.


"Sherry" and I sit and talk for two and a half hours mostly about her. I like that. For I have nothing really to offer a lady of her caliber. I am totally-amazed at how we have a lot in common. One being she also has lost her husband of 27 years and is doing her best to survive.


She smiles a lot during those two and a half hours. I manage to just focus on "her," although in the back of my mind, Pam is ever-present. I like that. I wouldn't want to do anything to dishonor the memory of my late wife.


The two and a half hours go by with the speed of a purebred greyhound. I feel sad, and guilty at having coffee with another woman. "Sherry" senses this and resassures me that "it's just two new friends having coffee," and I suddenly feel better.


In the days ahead, we see each other many times. And share more coffee at t he same "mom and pop" restaurant. But the last time, we share a late-evening dinner that I asked "Sherry," to share with me on my first "date" since my wife had passed. She is so relaxed and secure with our time together I feel as if I have been reborn.


We both are in no hurry to enter into a long-lasting relationship. Yet. That is fine by me. The dates are a lot of fun. And I am re-learning so much about how a woman likes to be treated. My late wife was like that. She liked the little things that I'd do for her. "Sherry" is like this too.


The single red rose I gave her on our first "date" for this dinner made tears come to her eyes.


I think to myself, Pam, I hope you approve of "Sherry." I remember on our second date when the only thing I could afford was one rose for you too.


I fall into slumber sensing that Pam is smiling.

The End.

(Susiebrown48, I hope I made you proud.)

Actually, "this" is more like me

if dating another woman were available for me now at age 58.
if dating another woman were available for me now at age 58.

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Comments 50 comments

Nalini Marquez profile image

Nalini Marquez 4 years ago

This was an interesting piece. The idea of merging the non-fiction aspects with the fiction or the imaginative aspects can go many different places. I really like where you wrote from "I am not like most men" to "No phone calls, please." It was personal and revealed experience without having to say "and this happened," "and that happened."


Ellen Karman profile image

Ellen Karman 4 years ago from medina, Ohio

Wow, Kenneth, I too like how you worked in the non fiction with the fiction. A man of 58 would have no problem dating! It's funny we worry about the same things. I'm 45 what would happen to me? It seems so many things are changing in my life, I can sit still and the changes go around me!! Great thoughts, I don't think you will ever have to worry! Ellen Karman


picklesandrufus profile image

picklesandrufus 4 years ago from Virginia Beach, Va

Very interesting read Kenneth. I too am 58 and can't imagine going down that path again. Glad you have a good wife!


Curiad profile image

Curiad 4 years ago from Lake Charles, LA.

I am 56 and I would not know what to say on a date. I loved the way you put this story together.


lupine profile image

lupine 4 years ago from Southern California (USA)

Kenneth, you crack me up...you have such an imagination. I would like to say that you do have some good ideas on what it takes to date, the candlelight dinner, walk on the beach, rose, etc. Why not "date" your wife and do some of these things, you both may be surprised of how it could make your marriage even better and maybe she will forgive you 100%, for the things you said were your fault. All kidding aside, you must be doing something right to be married for 37 years.


Ellen Karman profile image

Ellen Karman 4 years ago from medina, Ohio

Kenneth, this is kinda funny and not addressed to you but I guess men in general. Now hypothetically, a man of 58 looking for a woman who looks like she could be on the cover of Vogue, and dressed to the nines (Gosh, when I go to the post office, I may have my barn boots on and a base ball hat on) But she's 32 (Oh lord I am 45!!!) but then she was married for 27 years, so she got married at 5, I've been married 22 years and I got married right after college! and had my first child in the first year. Any way, it makes us "real" gals, feel like we can never live up to what the world has made men think women look like and act like!! I've kept in shape and am the same small size I was when I was in the 12th grade! And dressed up I can look pretty good. But, you'll most likely see me in the book store in flip flops, shorts and a tee shirt on and some make up but that's it. I guess I'm asking all the men my age and up am I out of the running? Kenneth, you and I are friends, so this is in no way, how do I say this, I am not angry at men, I am angry at what the magazines and movies have put in men's minds - I don't know maybe some women can put some input into what I am saying. And some men. I have two kids in college, Okay I guess what I am asking, if something happens and I'm on my own, am I out of the running or women in my age category because we have a lot to offer!!!! just wondering, hope some men pipe in here?? Kenneth my friend, I'm sorry I'm opening up this subject on your beautifully written piece that obviously got me thinking. Your friend, Ellen


MsDora profile image

MsDora 4 years ago from The Caribbean

Interesting! Funny too and I think it would be funnier still if you did meet a real woman whose name is Sherry.


JayeWisdom profile image

JayeWisdom 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

I like lupine's suggestion--that you "date" Pam in the here and now, taking her out to candlelit dinners, walking on the beach with her and presenting her with a single rose...to celebrate the fact that she IS still here on Planet Earth with you. I imagine that suddenly asking your wife to go on a date with you might bring on some happy smiles from her, which would probably have a happy effect on you as well.

Dating again (for real, with new "dates", after the loss of a spouse or lover) doesn't usually live up to the fantasy, Ken. To call up that old saying, "You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince/princess." There are a lot more frogs out there than dream dates!


bac2basics profile image

bac2basics 4 years ago from Spain

Hi Kenneth. Hmmm, don´t quite know what to make of this hub of yours, or where it came to you.Funny thing is I am a widow and 57 this year. I have been a widow now for over 8 years. My husband truly was the love of my life and there will not be anyone else for me. I don´t feel lonely because I feel his presence so much with me, alone yes, but there is a big difference between the two . I still love him just as much as when he was here. I do miss him though every single day, some day´s almost to the extent of when he first died. Very occasionally I wonder what it would be like to have another man in my life, but know in reality I stop that happening because- A. When I have tried in the past, I have gone for the safety zone and focused on the unavailable old friend, and the other times although I didn´t realise at the time...Gay !!!, There has to be some Freudian reasoning in there somewhere don´t you think?... B. I know I put the barriers up too. maybe one day someone will come along and sweep me off my feet, but I´m certainly not looking or even hoping. When you have had the best..where do you go from there ? Just read Jaye Wisdoms comment about the frogs...how weird is that..When I first met my husband, we worked on a holiday camp and I had that exact poster up in my chalet, and it surely is the truth. Take Pam out on that dream date kenneth, and have a great time. :)


Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Voted up. Thanks for sharing this delightful and thought provoking hub. I have my soulmate and I'm 55 and this is it for life. I too couldn't go on without him and I'm glad I'm out of the dating game.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear Nalini,

First of all, thanks for reading my piece and secondly, thanks for your interesting comments. You were right. Blending fiction into non-fiction, works on some stories such as this one, but not all. Actually I DO LOVE the walks on beach at sunset; candlelight dinners; other romantic things, but in all honesty, and I say this with all respect to my companion, people change. I have, over the past years, tried to do some of this stuff and it didn't work. NOT HER FAULT, so I am not going to sit here and blame my mate for changing. This I couldnt control.

But I stay here wit her for I am safe, secure and know that I COULD NOT get "out there," again. Women where I live are not that into a physically-disabled man with no hair, overweight, and just addicted to writing.

Sure I am a non-smoker, drinker and gambler. I am a normal guy. GOD in His majestic creativity, made some of the most beautiful women in the world, and SOME ARE HERE ON HUBS, but I dont chase them or dream of them. I simply enjoy His works and go on.

And as for my companion, if SHE DID leave me, she could throw a rock and find someone much more compatiable than me.

I am sorry if this sounds harsh, but I am not going to tell you or anyone a lie.

Thanks for your valuable input.

KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dearest Ellen,

Thank you so very much for your comments that bolstered my self-esteem. You havent seen me in-person, and I can only write from a truthful base . . .women do not, at least aroud where I live, go for guys like me.

They love the men "in the fast lane," gamblers, drinkers and doing some "weed" along the way.

I am NOT like that. I live a somewhat boring life. And that makes me happy. I am mostly a recluse due to my incurable Fibromyalgia and Neurothopy in my bones, muscles and nerves, but thats fine.

I have in YOU, a wonderful friend. I couldnt ask for a better person to confide in and talk to.

And I believe what you say in your second comment, SOCIETY IN ITSELF has made WOMEN and guys, into mindless beings of corporate warehousing. A woman who is a pound overweight, OH MY GOD, she is obese. Same for a man.

WE either fit their mold, or we dont. And I DONT.

But talking to FRIENDS like YOU, Ellen, makes my life brighter. And happier.

Sincerely, KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear picklesandrufus,

I know what you mean. Oh, thanks for your comment. I loved it. I wouldnt survive if I had to FIND a new companion. I do not like to be rejected simply because a GIRL has the power to do so.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hey, curiad,

don't feel bad, friend. If I had a date right now with a hot lady, I would have to take a notebook along filled with subjects, jokes, and interesting stories to keep her occupied.

NO WOMAN likes to see a man like me with no hair, in need of lyposuction, and a college degree.

That is the facts.

But thank God for notebooks.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear Lupine,

Thank you for your nice comment that I appreciated, but as I told Nalini, the top commenter, I have tried several times to show romance to my companion only to be shot-down with "ohh, that again," or "what are you up to?" and those were SERIOUS comments that took the very life out of me.

So I do what I can to make HER happy - - -sweeping; cleaning; keeping house clean; dishes washed; vacuuming; making beds; folding clothes and sometimes cooking what I know how to cook . . .and thats the only way I can survive. I will not go into the details behind the scenes.

If I were talking in-person to YOU, I could explain.

Sometimes, its the man, who is suffering, but I DO KNOW that I am NOT a Skirt-Chaser now or anytime soon.

KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

My Dear Ellen,

(for your second comment) "My new GOOD friend, I think you are worrying too much about what people say or don't say." IF YOU are happy with your looks, thats all that counts. And if your mate doesnt complain, just go with the flow and be happy.

Ellen, dear, we are prisoners of a shallow society today. Do you know that over 1 Trillion dollars is spent, not by Obama, but by ad agencies who represent make-up; dress; diet drugs; lipstick and glamour products??? 1 Trillion dollars.

From your photo, and I am venturing by faith here, so dont be upset, "you are a good looking girl," and that is an honest remark. So why kill yourself and try to make YOU into someone youre not?

Okay?

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hello, Ms Dora,

In 1973 or 1974, I DID know a girl named Sherry. I liked her so much, but she was a habitual-liar and lied to me over and over and all without any remorse. I have tried for years to forgive her for the last LIE she told me years ago, hurt me so bad that I came near to having a complete mental breakdown.

This Sherry was and will never be WORTH ALL OF THAT.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Jaye,

and a Sincere Thank you, for your kind advice that I HAVE tried years ago and it didnt go far.

MY mate is not that romantic. I found that out many years ago when each day I would leave for work I would say, "Love you, babe, and you are so pretty today," she would make some hissing sound like I was only talking to get something.

A man gets tired, Jaye, of this treatment and he will turn off the compliments.

Nowadays, I do what I can do make her happy and that is all Im able to do and Jaye, even that isnt enough, but God knows all about it.

Thanks for being a good friend.

KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, bac2basics,

I agree with you and if my mate were to go to be with Jesus, I would go nuts. Ive told her this continually since 2003, when I became disabled. And I meant it.

When she goes on business trips for her company, did you know that I cannot sleep in our bed without her?

I sleep on the couch or in my recliner.

And I sense a lot of personal security in your comment about the presence of your mate and that is wonderful.

I admire you for that, and for other things.

Thank you for your insight. I needed it.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear Gypsy Rose Lee . . .Bravo! As people used to say, "you go, girl!" I am happy for you and I will strive to be just like you because in 2012, I would be eaten-alive in the dating game.

Kenneth


catgypsy profile image

catgypsy 4 years ago from the South

Kenneth, interesting hub! We are the same age and I don't date any more, it's just the last thing on my mind because I have so much else going on in my life. It is also kind of frightening these days to even think about it...there are so many kooks out there! I've been married and divorced twice and have no interest in marriage again (unless he's a millionaire...haha) so I find my solitary life suits me better these days. There's only one man I'd want to see again and he passed away. Enjoy your time with Pam.

I have to laugh a little because I caught the same thing that Ellen did..."Sherry" would have been 5 when they married!


lupine profile image

lupine 4 years ago from Southern California (USA)

Kenneth, you say you're overweight, bald, etc., that my friend is overlooked by your mate of so many years, you are loved despite any turndowns you have had in your attepts at romance. Keep writing... you come up with some good ones!


Ellen Karman profile image

Ellen Karman 4 years ago from medina, Ohio

Hi Kenneth,

No, I'm sorry I may have complicated my comment, I am not sub conscience about my looks at all!!! I feel for the women and young girls who are!! They think that they are supposed to live up to the women on the cover of Vogue, it drives them in to eating disorders and such. I am very secure in how I look and like how I look and more importantly as a woman with two daughters I have had to be confident weather I'm with them at the grain store and I'm in a base ball hat with my pony tail through the back and in dirt covered jeans and work boots I am there to get supplies for my farm and looks has nothing to do with it, even when I stop at the corner store on the way home and see people we or they know, I don't care. Or, I could be at a fund raiser for Children's Hospital and dressed up - yeah, for the first ten minutes it's fun to be made up and dressed up and looking great BUT, within eleven minutes, I'd rather be back in jeans and my hair in a pony tail! My other point is why do men want to date a woman more than twenty plus years their junior? I don't get it. I've never allowed a man to talk negatively to me, especially my husband who maybe has a few times and because I have two daughters they were younger when these few comments happened and I had to put him in his place so my daughters would know that that is not a way a man treats a woman.

Now, as you know Kenneth my youngest is leaving for college and I wonder if twenty two years of marriage has gotten to boring or if we'll have fun again like we did before the kids became teen's and happily became center stage as we both enjoyed them here and both are beautiful, strong, confident women and they are the proudest and most honorable parts of my life- has been raising them. I'm not perfect and have shown them that and hopefully and I think succeeded in showing them that no one is perfect. And, I've been honest with them and I know they can come to me with any problem, no matter what and I will help.

I got off track. Anyhow, I just hate how men think a woman should look! I spent six hours on my farm tractor yesterday, and I had to fix the Brush Hog so I had grease all over my hands, which got on my face but I am lost in loving what I'm doing the last few days of summer that I forget and run to the store in my big diesel truck and run for a cold soda, candy bar and tomorrows five hour energy. It isn't until I get in back in my truck that I realize I also have grease on my cheek. I laugh going home. Any how, I hope we both have great futures in what ever trials and tribulations that may occur! I look forward to reading more from you my friend and may God Bless us All! Ellen


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear catgypsy (still love typing that name!) . . .I am with you, seriously-speaking. Dating, EVEN IF I COULD, would not be on my list of "things to do before I die." I doubt if there are any females who would just LIKE ME FOR ME, and that's it. I am not rich, in-shape or popular with cliques or "fast crowds." I am a simple man with a simple mind with a simple mission: to make as many people smile as I can with my hubs before I leave this walk of life.

I have written this before, but I thought it bore repeating.

Thanks, catgypsy, for all of your comments and friendship.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hello, lupine,

I will. Thanks for the insight. I think in my case, it's easier for me to see my situation through the eyes of someone outside my area of life. Thanks for being so wise.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear Ellen, my Good Friend . . .what can I say? I was wrong. So sorry to get things entwined with confusion. I apologize. I see now what you meant to begin with, and personally, just in the comments you have left, I find you a very-sensitive, caring, and outgoing girl with a heart so big for others, it cannot be scoped with a laser measuring device.

Your comments, such as this one, would make a great hub in itself. I mean that. I got such a thrill out of visually-watching you with ball cap on a tractor mowing grass and with grease on your hands . . .WOW, what honesty.

I am so glad that you and I are friends, Ellen. I am serious. And it is "I" who is blessed by YOUR friendship and one whom is anxious to read MORE of YOUR hubs.

Peace to you and DO NOT quit writing.

Kenneth


Nalini Marquez profile image

Nalini Marquez 4 years ago

Hello Kenneth,

Thank you for responding; sorry about my delayed response! It makes sense that while you do actually like the things you included in your hub that you have changed with respect to some of these. I think that happens a lot in life, but instead of recognizing how that happens in life we often place blame—so it is good that you did not and that you recognized the change within yourself.

Sometimes the truth or reality is harsh but it doesn’t change it from being the truth or reality; we all work with and share (or do not share) these as we decide, and it sounds like your decision was based on not telling me or anyone a lie—a decision based on an ethical and moral basis which I have no problem with. Although it does take some of the romance out of the hub haha ;-). It sounds like you have perspective and priorities that are in check, and I am glad that you are enjoying God’s works and continuing through life! Many in life just do the latter.

I hope your companion leaving you is not a reality that you have to face and that you both continue to grow and change in a way that makes you both happy, and that you both keep enjoying life!

Thank you for taking the time to write a thoughtful and thought-out response, and for sharing your experience as candidly as you have. It’s pretty neat to be able to meet and talk to so many different people on HubPages, and I have enjoyed both reading your hub and your response.

Nalini


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

My Dear Nalini,

Happy Labor Day to you, and secondly, I admire the comment above that you left for me. I feel so warm in my heart when I read your sensitive words. I am really like a leaf twisting in the wind with my personal "windmill tipping," but hey, life is what it is. No one, not even God, said it was fair. Now life WAS fair BEFORE mankind rebelled against God, so there it is. But that still doesnt explain why I am not happy and fulfilled as I should be.

I am sorry that if you feel that I dumped this on you. For that, I apologize.

And yes, Hubs is a great place to make and keep friends.

I include you in both those analogies.

Kenneth


susiebrown48 profile image

susiebrown48 4 years ago from Clearwater, FL

Dear Kenneth, I am above and beyond, humbled and honored by your kind words of praise and that you were inspired to write this from something I wrote. I am saddened to hear that you are not 100% happy. To experience and give joy and love is our highest calling in my estimation. I thoroughly enjoyed your hub and respectfully submit that a)hair is overrated, b) who DOESN'T need lipo and c) if at first you don't succeed with the romance gestures, don't quit... you can teach old dogs new tricks! Consistency is key! Just make sure the gesture is for her, and not for how it makes you feel to do the gesture and it will be so much better received :-)


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

8/29/2012/--8:13 p.m., cdst,

Dear Susie . . .in a word, "wow!" What a comment! I needed that. And in MY humble opinion, you are not only a super-talented writer, but have a calling to make people feel good. I mean that. I shall keep your words with me for the remainder of my life. I am not being overly-dramatic, or overtly-sensitive, but telling YOU the truth.

Have a safe and happy Labor Day and write anytime.

Kenneth


Nalini Marquez profile image

Nalini Marquez 4 years ago

Hello Kenneth,

Happy Labor Day Weekend to you as well! I am glad that I was able to send some warmth and that you both appreciated that and took that from my response. Unfortunately, life isn't fair; which is one of the few things life should be BUT since it is not, we can really only reconcile ourselves to that truth. What a great feeling right? ;-). I don't know if life was truly fair before the rebellion against God as there is only so much info that we have with respect to fairness in that time period--however, I do think that there are many things we can't explain and that among these are why we feel or do not feel certain ways, towards certain things, at different times, etc. Your comment made me think of a quote:

"If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world."-C.S. Lewis

Not necessarily the answer or explanation to the lack of happiness or fulfillment that you expressed, but definitely food for thought.

No need to apologize and no worries about dumping! I hope the sharing helps you in your journey and in finding the explanation or answers that you seek.

Thank you for the inclusion in both of those analogies! I include you in those as well and do hope that you are able to enjoy the weekend and perhaps find an answer or two :-). Sorry for the novel; somehow I end up writing one without meaning to.

Nalini


Sueswan 4 years ago

Hi Kenneth,

While reading this hub I was thinking you should be taking your wife on dates and not thinking of the dates you could get after she is gone.

Then I read your comments. My friend, it sounds like you are lonely and not truly happy.

It makes me sad that you put yourself down. To me that is a bigger disability than you having fibromyalgia.

The girl on the cover of vogue is air brushed. Now a days with plastic surgery anyone can be physically beautiful. True beauty comes from within.

Take care :)


Debra Emerson 4 years ago

You wrote a very good hub. I have read so of the comments and those you have written and I think they are very good.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Nailini!

No need to apologize, EVER, for the content or length of your comments, for they gave me a warm hope of a brighter day. And your C.S. Lewis quote, I LOVE. Thanks for taking the time to just let me cross your mind. I sincerely appreciate it and pray that God blesses you so much that you will swear that you are dreaming.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dearest Susan,

Thank you too, for your sweet and insightful comments. You have always made my day with your thoughts. I appreciate you so much and wish for you, the BEST day or night, whenever you read this. Do you need a cab?

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Debra, my good friend,

Thank you kindly for your comment on this hub. Since eye surgery, Ive not felt like publishing that many hubs, but wait until I am back 100% . . .then look out.

Take care, Deb.

Kenneth


Sueswan 4 years ago

Dearest Kenneth,

I need a cab. You always make me smile my friend. :)


Nalini Marquez profile image

Nalini Marquez 4 years ago

Hello Kenneth,

Thank you; I appreciate that. I love receiving warm hopes of brighter days especially because that can be hard to find and so I am glad that my comments were able to give that to you! C.S. Lewis was full of great thoughts, and I am glad that you liked the quote! I sincerely appreciate the beautiful blessings that you have sent my way. That is very kind and I pray that God blesses you wonderfully!

Nalini


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear Sueswan,

Thanks, my Dear Friend, for your loving comments that always touch my soul. And furthermore . . .uh, oh, it's raining and here we are standing here on the sidewalk without an umbrella to our name. I got it. "TAXXXXXI!" Great, Susan. Here comes "Joey," a nephew of Harry, who said that YOU were his favorite rider.

Take care and Joey, drive carefully.

KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear Nailini . . .you are welcome, but my dear friend, I am the one whom is blessed just by knowing your words. Ive said this many times, "I have THE BEST followers of anyone on HubPages. You, Sueswan and all on this hub comment boxes prove that point.

Thanks.

KENNETH


Nalini Marquez profile image

Nalini Marquez 4 years ago

Dear Kenneth,

That is kind and your words have made an impact on me as well! I am glad that we were able to share a positive message, and that you have the best followers on HubPages who also share a positive message! Thanks to you :-).

Nalini


lupine profile image

lupine 4 years ago from Southern California (USA)

Kenneth, you really do make a connection with your followers, including myself, thru your hubs. You are a genuine person, glad I met you on hubpages.


Sueswan 4 years ago

Dearest Kenneth,

I told Joey how lucky I am to have such a good friend like you. :)


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Nalini,

Thank you, again, for your kind and caring words. Yes, I believe that a positive connection has been made through hubs between you and I, and I am grateful!

Your words have definitely touched me also. Write to me anytime and next time, stay longer.

KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hello, Lupine,

Thank you for your sweet comment. I love to brag on MY FOLLOWERS and YOU and the REST of MY FOLLOWERS ARE THE BEST. Anywhere. Wish I could have enough money to take you all out to dinner at an expensive restaurant where the waiters have to wear tuxedos.

What a great time that would be.

KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Deares Susan,

what did he say? And "I" am the blessed one in this friendship. Hey look! A Yellow Cab! And wouldn't you know it . . ."Art" is driving today. He is a buddy of mine . . ."Hey, Art, how 'bout giving this fine lady a FREE fare? You will! Great. Get in, Susan. And be aware that Art appreciates women and I mean appreciates them."

KENNETH and be careful, Art and Susan.


lupine profile image

lupine 4 years ago from Southern California (USA)

Kenneth- May your wish come true, that would be great!


Nalini Marquez profile image

Nalini Marquez 4 years ago

Hello Kenneth,

Thanks to you as well and I am grateful too. And thank you for welcoming me to write again and to stay longer--will do!

Take care Kenneth and keep up the good work/writing, and positive message sharing. :-)

Until next time,

Nalini


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, lupine,

Thank you sooooooooooooooooo much! I appreciate YOUR friendship and comments that cheered me up today.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hello, Nalini,

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I am always in need of some cheering-up and some encouraging words. I have THE BEST followers on HubPages . . .I would put my followers list up against any and all hubbers. And I love my followers so much.

Kenneth

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