How Many Bridal Showers Should a Bride Have

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Introduction to Bridal Showers

You may know a bride to be and be confused about how many shower invitations you have—or haven’t—received. Just how many bridal showers should one bride have?

The answer is, it depends. There is no fixed number. It will totally depend on the bride’s work, family and social life. But which showers you attend and which you send your regrets are totally up to you. Don’t feel obligated to attend every shower as often there can be as many as five!

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The Family Shower

Traditionally, the maid of honor will give the bride her big shower. And in days of old, the showering would end there. This would be the time both moms and all family and close friends would be invited to either an intimate event for the ladies or a larger event with even more female relatives, but times are changing.

Often, there are additional showers given by others, couples are invited and the festivities spill over into other areas of the bride’s life.

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The Work Shower

Often times, the bride will have friends at work who want to throw her a bridal shower. These events can range from the break room cake, coffee and unique bridal shower favors to after-hours drinks and dinner. Chances are if you’re part of the bride’s close friends, you’re going to be invited. The tricky part is when you are a close friends and coworker. You may be invited to the family shower as well. You might choose to bring the larger bridal shower gift to her family shower and give her a smaller token of your well-wishes for the work shower, but yes, you should show up at both.

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The Step Family Shower

Often, if there is an extended step family or there is tension between anyone in the family, a separate step-shower may be thrown. This will depend on the particular family members involved. If the bride’s step-parents live out of state and they’d like to shower her at their local, she may have a third bridal shower to attend. Guests will typically come from the geographical area that the step-parents reside in and those who are farther away would not be expected to fly in for this additional shower.

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The Club Shower

People are involved in so many things these days that there could be a shower or two in the bride’s future that just may catch her off guard. Her book club may surprise her with a party one night, or her bowling league, or her Tai Chi class. If she’s an elementary teacher, the students’ moms may want to throw her a party during school hours. Usually, these showers will be completely prepared and paid for by the members of the group and family and other friends will not be invited.

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The Church Shower

If the bride is affiliated with an organized religion, depending on the congregation, they may decide to host a shower in her honor as well. If you’ve been invited (and given gifts at) the family and/or work shower, you are not expected to attend this shower and give another gift. If your lives cross over into many areas of the bride’s life, she will understand that you can’t be at all her showers and she certainly won’t be expecting a wedding gift basket each time you do show up.

Bridal Shower Favor Ideas

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The Couples Shower

Couples from the bride’s neighborhood or circle of friends who don’t fit into any of the other categories might like to shower the bride with wedding gifts as well. Maybe it’s her second wedding and this is a new group of friends for the bride and groom. This could be anything from a couples’ night out at a restaurant or a Jack and Jill shower at someone’s home. Again, it’s perfectly ok to decline if you’re already gone to several of the other showers and are getting pooped out. No one expects you to give a gift for each invitation you receive for a shower. Your simple note or call with regrets and well-wishes is enough.

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Comments Welcome! 6 comments

Pinkchic18 profile image

Pinkchic18 4 years ago from Minnesota Author

Dear confused friend,

That is too bad that you have to deal with that! I would not say that it's your obligation to hold a bridal shower unless you were VERY good friends with the bride or groom and if you OFFERED to do it. Otherwise I would leave it to the couple's family or friends. It doesn't seem like something that should be mandatory on your part. Wishing you the very best.


Confused friend 4 years ago

We are friends of the mother of the groom. She has asked us to host a shower for her. We are thinking that the bride and grooms friends should host and we should attend. Should we be hosting a shower for this couple that we don't even know? Sort of put out....


Pinkchic18 profile image

Pinkchic18 5 years ago from Minnesota Author

@wedding2012 - Typically only people who are invited to the wedding are invited to the bridal showers, but if you want to throw it for her and people there don't expect to be invited, then it could be a nice gesture. It all depends on the situation there. Thank you for your comment!


wedding2012 5 years ago

Question: If you give an office shower, neighbourhood shower - do the people you invite have to be only people who are invited to the wedding? I have a club friend getting married next year and myself and other clubmates would like to throw her a shower. We don't expect to be invited to the wedding - although I'm sure some of the girls on the club list will be. Is it still OK to invite the rest of the members?


onegirlfactory profile image

onegirlfactory 6 years ago

Excellent hub. My sister and her husband had a joint shower when they got engaged, by the way, with friends and family from both sides in attendance. It was a great way to hang out and get to know one another better.


acaetnna profile image

acaetnna 6 years ago from Guildford

Why not have as many showers as possible I say. Great hub, thank you.

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