How To Handle It When Someone You Love Let You Down
How To Handle It When Someone You Love Let You Down
You must first realize that everyone makes mistakes, it is encoded in our DNA. However, forgiveness is also encoded in our DNA. Therefore some of us get a second chance to redeem ourselves from our mistakes and be forgiven and given a second chance.
When someone we love let us down, depending on the severity of what they've done, we'll forgive our loved ones, but if it is something that we have a hard tme accepting, we won't forgive them at all or it will be a long time before we decide that forgiving them is the right thing to do. God's love in us is the driving force for forgiveness.
If your husband or wife has cheated on you, they've let you down in a big way and it might be hard for someone to forgive their partner for their infidelity. It will take a while for you to trust them again and sometimes the help of a therapist can help you learn to forgive your partner.
There are many ways someone can let you down, for example, if someone backed out of being your maid of honor for your wedding, they didn't show up or give you any notice, they have let you down and you'll naturally be angry with your friend or relative for letting you down this way.
When you are let down by someone, don't let it hurt you emotionally by punishing yourself or pitying yourself. Anger will have to be subdued and sometimes quickly forgiving your friend or relative for what they've done is best, just remember not to count on them anymore for anything.
People you know who've never let you down should be the only ones you should count on to help you or be there for you. Needless to say, you should always reciprocate to keep that trusting pattern going in your relationship. This is a tip I always follow, never recruit or demand that someone do something for you. Ask them politely and give them a chance to say no. Don't be disappointed in them because they can't do what you've asked of them.
Others have a life too, and they might not be enough time in their schedule for you. Things happen that can prevent someone from being there for you, like sickness, it slipped their mind or they might just really be tired and can't do it. Our expectations of others can really become a disappointment for us. So first learn to depend on yourself before you depend on others.
Don't cloud your judgement with relying on others not let you down because it can be possible that someone whose always been there for us can surprise you with not being there when you need them most. Asking someone are they one hundred percent sure that they will pull though for you is not fair to them, because they can't control the weather, illness, or any other circumstances that prevents them from being there for you.
Always keep in mind that something can possibly go wrong and have a back up plan just in case someone bails out on you whether they do it on purpose or not. Family and friends are important, so never let a mistake that wasn't done on purpose put a strain on your relationship with them.
If this let down has made you question your relationship with them, discuss it over with them by first remaining calm and asking them why they let you down. Some people are so hurt when someone let them down that they don't even consider that it could have been out of that friend's control and in return they too will get back at that friend by letting them down.
If you measure your relationships on what others do for you, you will be disappointed many times, sometimes we let ourselves down, and we have a hard time forgiving ourselves so don't think your friends and family is any better than you are.