How to avoid a one night stand and the nightmare of waking up in someone else's bed
There's a lot of talk about how to have a one night stand, but this post focuses on how to avoid a one night stand. It is aimed at reaffirming some of the basic things girls and women should watch out for while going to parties or meeting someone. One night stands are meaningless sexual encounters that may leave an emotional, mental and physical scar for life. Let's soak up on some much needed wisdom and remind ourselves how to avoid one night stands.
1) Don't give into peer pressure
Peer pressure can be one of the major reasons why girls and women alike fall into the trap of a one night stand or a sexual encounter. If you are in a group that talks about and takes part in activities that promote the same, feel free to step away and declare that you will not be a part of the chaos.
It is better not to succumb to peer pressure than to go along with the flow of things and then having to regret and worry about your past.
2) Don't have a sexual escapade simply because everyone else is doing it
It is very easy to get carried away and do what everyone else is doing, especially when you are a part of a group in school, college or even during a vacation.
Spring break or schoolies, make sure that you don't get sucked into the whirlpool of 'Everyone's doing it, why not me' A bad sexual encounter will leave an emotional scar for life.
3) Don't drink too much
As obvious as it is, drinking too much can be a major lead up to a one night stand. Alcohol is a social lubricant and when you've had too much, it is hard to make good decisions. You may consider yourself a girl who can handle her drinks, but as the night goes by, a few drinks too many can easily lead to a one night stand with a total stranger.
For all you know, your sexual escapade may not even go beyond the dirty walls of the bathroom of the nightclub or the pub you are in. Know your limits, and stop drinking when you think you've had too much and just leave when before it gets too late.
4) Always have a place to crash at
"Where am I going to go after the party? It will be too late for public transport" If a question like this is plaguing your mind before a party, make sure you find the right answer before you step out of the door.
Call a responsible friend and make sure that you arrange for your stay at their place for the night. The last thing you'd want is to be caught up in is a moral dilemma involving a decision that leads to a one night stand at a friend's acquaintance's pad, just because you had nowhere else to go to.
5) Always have someone to go home with
"Can I drop you home?" are the dreaded words that often seem too kind or generous when a gentleman walks up to you at 3 am on a Friday night. If that gentleman is not the friend you had planned to go home with, do not budge, no matter how great a chord you struck up with him earlier.
If you are attending a party, a pub, a nightclub or a night out in the town, always have someone to drop you home or someone to go home with.
6) Have a friend by your side and party in pairs
One of the best assets a single girl can have while on a night out is a trustworthy best buddy. Go out to parties with a friend and make a promise that both of you will watch each others' backs.
This means your friend will forget everything else in the world and be by your side if you become too drunk to handle yourself or in any other worst case scenario. You will do the same too.
7) Always remember that rich is not always nice
Suppose you are on a first date with a guy who has an expensive set of wheels, a Gucci suit, manners of the most humble gentleman ever, the seemingly kindest heart and the innocence that of a 2 year old. This kind soul may in fact be your worst nightmare.
Even if the person in question is an acquaintance of your best friend, remember that he is not your best friend. Make sure you are not blinded by the bling and excessive display of wealth could be a warning bell unless you are in the habit of being around the uber rich.
8) Don't accept drinks from strangers or random acquaintances
It is widely reported that drinks can be spiked with hallucinogenic drugs that may leave you incapable controlling yourself for hours together.
Make it a rule and always get your drink yourself or from someone that you can trust your life with while you are on a night out.
9) If it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't
If the thought "This does not feel right at all" crosses your mind before you are about to plunge into bed with a new acquaintance, it probably isn't.
Ask yourself again if the position you are in can hurt you in the future, physically or emotionally. If it still does not feel right, apologize and excuse yourself to make your way out. Get a cab and head home.
10) Talk to a close and responsible friend
A last minute chat to a close friend can be god sent if the friend actually cares for your well being. If you find yourself in a compromising position with someone who you have met just moments back and you're thinking "Gee should I be doing this?", excuse yourself and speak to your responsible friend.
A moment of passion may have taken over logic, but a true friend may be able to bring you back to reality and stop you from doing something that you are likely to regret.
Note: This article is not meant to be sexist or gender biased. Women and men may both be equally prone to unwanted and undesirable sexual encounters.
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