How to get rid of parents in law.( It's not gonna happen)

 Ha! Since the dawn of man, in laws have been a problem. Not to say dad in-law is innocent, but mommy dearest(in-law) usually is the one to manipulate all the trouble! Even Fred Flintstone didn't get along with his mother in-law; they are animated reflections of what it is like to deal with in-laws in reality. Let me give you an example of what a crazy in law is like, as well as tips on how to break your tension whenever your spouse's parents come around.

I met my husband back in October 04' and things progressed quickly from there. We had been together for about three months before I met his mother. Here was this little lady who looked like she could have been Mrs. Clause. I thought she was the nicest older lady I had ever met and so I thought things were great! That was until the day I did my boyfriend's laundry. His mom drove over to our house and gave me a lecture on how it was sweet for me to do the wash, but she does his laundry. I could not believe this woman had the nerve to say that! When his mom would come around, she would always mention Tomas'(my boyfriend), ex-wife and drag on about her bi-polar condition. His mother would always blame the divorce and the fights between Tomas and his first wife on her condition. I just sat back and wondered how could this woman make so many assumptions about a mental disorder that she was not educated on? Especially since I was diagnosed with manic bi-polar disorder a few years earlier. I was even labeled borderline personality disorder! Here I had to tolerate this nonsense for respect for Tomas.

His brother's wedding was the next jab at me. They had the nerve to address the invitation to Tomas and guest! Even though we were living together. I did go because I love my new sister in-law. A couple of days later I got the Flu. Tomas stayed with me in case I needed to go to the hospital. His mom called and started to tell him that I was my mom and dad's problem to worry about. That is the day my mouth unhinged!!!

At first, I just told her that people in serious relationships look out for each other and it wasn't really her business. I also told her that I was diagnosed bi-polar and you should have heard her tune change! My confrontation of the issues did not stop her.

Let me make this easier for all you readers. I will give you a summarized list of "my mother in-law".

She has bailed hin out of legal issues time after time; she continues to do his laundry (mind you, we are married now!); she prepares his breakfast and lunch EVERY day; she calls EVERY night to wake my husband up for work, even though I am awake and sitting next to him; she buys his clothes, scibbies and all; she drives to his work to drop off his lunch if forgotten; she buys his groceries and toiletries, and the list of things she does for her son, who is 37 years old, and my husband, go way beyond this.

Now let me just say that my husband's dad passed away when Tomas was 19 years old. Every time he does something stupid, his mother has the nerve to say it is because he was just a small boy when he lost his dad. I told my husband to get it through his head that at 19, he was an adult! This woman makes no attempt to smother her oldest son. It is almost as ifshe thinks of my husband as her husband( his father). Anyway, she cannot interfere like this!

Speaking of the things she does, how about the things she has not done. As a granparent, most would want to be in their grandkid's lives as much as possible! Not my mother in-law! First, was our baby shower. She had other plans for that day so she came to the front door and dropped a gift off! My mother in-law did not even come in to meet my family or say hello to her family! The shower was a hit without her. Our daughter's 1st birthday was in May at a park with a beautifully decorated pavilion. I had planned the event 4 months early and immediately sent the invitations so people would be able to come. We had purchased a lot of food for our bbq and I special ordered a Care Bear cake(which was awesome)! Well, my family showed up with their kids' and I ended up smashing the small cake in her face. My daughter and I got it next, of course.:) I said a prayer and thanked God for giving us a wonderful day and such wonderful family and friends that came and celebrated Cadence with us. It did however, upset me that Tomas' mom nor his brother or sister in-law did not call, come to the party,nothing. I demanded my husband call his family and find out where they were and they responded in anger at the fact that we were upset! The very same week, Tomas' brother went to Mexico to see his wife's newly born neice.I was pissed and I let my husband know just how much! My husband tried to make excuses for why his family never joins our family get togethers. Remember, Tomas was raised by the very woman I am ranting about:) Anyway, we thought it would be a great idea to have our daughter's 2nd birthday party at my mom's house since she is a corner lot that is huge! Like before, the invites went out 5 months early so there could be no excuses from anyone! The only people who did not call nor show up was my in-laws! In fact, they could not even give our daughter a card or thier time! I solved this problem by deciding to not invite them to future celebrations. If they do not like that, tough, they brought it on themselves. Be sure, I will remind them of thier absence in our lives. Holidays are easy because my in-laws get together, but I am never on the invite list. When I do accompany my husband, the family acts fake and two faced, character traits I do  not tolerate.

The grand daddy of all of the evil things tis woman has done is she cut my daughter's hair!!! Not once, but twice!!! Now, everyone knows that you never cut someone else's child's hair, NEVER!!! My daughter has those blonde curls and we were letting  it grow out. After the first time, I scolded my mother in-law as if she was any person on the street! It took a long while for me to allow my daughter to visit her again, but I did try. The very next day, my daughter's bangs were chopped and hacked! Needless to say, I told my mother in-law where to go and she'll be lucky if I don't send her there!

I am not a mean person, but I do have boundaries. If being polite does not work, do not be afraid to speak up for yourself. Remember, just because they are older, does not change the fact that you are still an adult with your own thoughts, methods, and so on. OLDER does not always mean WISER!!!

My mother in-law got my drift and at least she does not come to my home nor call me. She does however still do everything as mentioned above for her 37 year old son, my husband!     

 

This is my my husband(left),Cadence, Niche, his mom, and Miguel Lopez
This is my my husband(left),Cadence, Niche, his mom, and Miguel Lopez
This is the only time Miguel, Cadence's Uncle has ever held her or even visited her!:(
This is the only time Miguel, Cadence's Uncle has ever held her or even visited her!:(
Give me a "C"! This is Cadence; the girl the Lopez family is missing out on!
Give me a "C"! This is Cadence; the girl the Lopez family is missing out on!
Alex and his sister Cadence at the zoo.
Alex and his sister Cadence at the zoo.
How could you stand not having this little girl in your life!?!
How could you stand not having this little girl in your life!?!

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Comments 34 comments

ajcor profile image

ajcor 7 years ago from NSW. Australia

I am so sorry,lipshooter that you obviously have the mother in law from hell in your lives! Try to get on without them - better still find a dear older friend who supplant and indeed become the proxy grandmother your little girl is missing out on...could work for everyone except maybe your poor husband who obviously still loves his mum...


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

Well, I don't have that kind of problem, by a long shot. The hubby should break from the chi-chi!


ajcor profile image

ajcor 7 years ago from NSW. Australia

Toad what is chi chi?


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

gazonkas on a woman, where the mommy gives her milk.


ajcor profile image

ajcor 7 years ago from NSW. Australia

Thanks Toad - just had to google "gazonkas" lol...maybe you are right - could make everyone happy!


Askme profile image

Askme 6 years ago

You need to be firmer with your mother in law. She has no business still doing your husband's laundry or making his lunch. That is HIS job. He's an adult. This woman needs to butt out. She is interferring with your marriage. She is the epitome of a meddling mother in law. It's toxic to your family relationship (meaning the one with your husband and your child). Your mother in law is in the extended family category and she needs to defer to you. She needs to make sure it's okay with YOU if she does your husband's laundry or if she cuts your child's hair. This woman is narcassistic meaning she does not see her son as a man with his own life but rather an extension of HER live. He's grown up, your mother in law needs to get a hobby. She's a real witch and she will end up ruining your marriage if she hasn't already. Tell hubby to grow a pair and tell his mom to back off and mind her own business. She's a controlling B*tch.


Deanna 6 years ago

I don't think your husband can ever stand up to his mother, if he tries she will cut him down and make him feel like dirt. So she will continue to treat him like a little and he will tell you that she cares about him that's why she is doing it. These men need to grow a backbone and stand up to their mothers and then they wonder why their wives are always cranky. F mother-in-laws after all you are only related to them 'by law' nothing else.


lipshooter profile image

lipshooter 6 years ago Author

Well, I took the stand I needed to, just for my husband to walk out on my children and I on October 3rd! His mom instructed him to mail me a money order for $25 a week to take care of me, Cadence and Alex!!!


Shaz 6 years ago

I know exactly how you feel only mine is worse she's evil in carnate she keeps trying to break our marriage but my husband is too blind to see & sides her for everything no matter how crazy it is. It started from the month I got married & now almost 2yrs down the line it just keeps getting worse. It's gotten so bad that I feel only if she dies will our lives come better. We are 3daughter in laws & she interfers in ALL our lives & hates the fact that we get along like a house on fire. She's managed to end her big sons first marriage & faked a stroke to end the 2nd sons, even broke her daughters engagment so that she won't be left alone. God help me but she's the most even witch on the face of this earth & I know God doesn't even want her coz he doesn't need that kind of evil near him. Any solutions to my problem. PS my husband WILL NEVER say no even when his mother wanted to take my 2week old baby away from me.


Chuck 6 years ago

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Chuck 6 years ago

Yes, you can get rid of your in-laws! Don't ever let anyone tell you that you cannot.

Mine is a hard German. Mother-in-law is 70ish and still goes on about Jews. Absolutely pathetic! Has an ugly mean streak in her that will never go away. Manipulative and a power and attention freak.

Dumped her kids (my wife and her sister) when they were barely teens - to go marry a millionaire in Germany. Her advice to the girls always was "You can love a rich man, the same as a poor man" Anyhow, Comes back in the 90's and wants a warm, fuzzy relationship with them.

So zoom ahead, things were ok for a while, but Mother-in-law has psychotic mood swings. Things start up again. Sick woman through and through. So, we finally dumped the Nazi! Unholy piece of garbage is finally out of our lives!

How'd we do it? Simple.....we avoid all contact! Ignore everything...works like a charm.

Oh, she's fairly rich too, used to think we'd kiss her ass for inheritence. WRONG! My wife's sister takes up that mantle now...unfortunately almost a carbon copy of Nazi mom. Shame, she had potential.

Father-in-law is ex-military and an anal critic, but he is tolerable and has a kind heart underneath it all.

Peace....ahhhhh....can you feel it from there? LOL Love it!


Sabina 6 years ago

Your MIL is just as crazy as mine! Mine has a very strange relationship with her 3 sons. She has never gotten along with her own husband and has never had a real marriage. The two of them haven't slept in the same bed for decades! I feel she thinks her sons are like her husbands. She tries to break up all of their marriages and her sole desire is for her sons and grandchildren to all come and live with her in her house and be one big 'happy' family LOL! 2 of the 3 sons (including my husband) have now moved out of the city where the MIL lives and we are much much happier now. My MIL actually told my husband to leave me and our 3 kids and to come back and live with her and that she would support him. Currently I am the bread-winner and pay all the bills. My husband has a job but makes no money because he has loans to pay. I can say life is alot better after moving far away,however I have been unsuccessful at getting the in-laws out of my life forever. I am not sure if that can happen either.


Kristin 6 years ago

I am so relieved that I am not the only person out there! I have family in law problems too. Well today I took a stand. I wont let them trash talk me or push me around anymore and my daughter sure doesn't need it either! My parents in law have done nothing but favoritize my fiance's brothers son and girlfriend since the day he was born! I used to think that my daughter needed them (my parents both died over 2 years ago) because she has no other grand parents but I realized that she doesn't need someone who feels OBLIGATED to her. And I don't need a family that feels OBLIGATED to me either. They have shamed me from day 1 and I am taking my stand. Your blog really helped cheer me up :)


Steven 6 years ago

Well you do have the mother in law from hell, my hellion lives with me. Can you believe that she sprawls out in the living room floor (with her clothes on ) usually with one leg on the sofa & you can see all her vagina through the pants. I just cant take it any more. Why she wont live with her other kids is beyond me.


Lügen 5 years ago

You have a Nazi mother in law. Your husband needs to grow up and man up, and also buy a book "How to get rid of my own parents and man up to the challenge". Stories like this are abundant, the problem is not your in law, is your husband, who is not placing you on right spot, and still has his "mama help me" mentality. May be some testosterone therapy may help him.


Kanonymous 5 years ago

I'm so glad I came across this blog. My husband wont take a stand and kept making excuses for her, there are times where I was just so angry and said things just to hurt him because of all the hurt my MIL had to put me through. I've gotten into a couple fights with her but nothing seems to be improving. Most of the time, she is very nice and very giving, but at the same time she will throw it in your face. She is so controlling and always think highly of herself. I have distanced myself from her since our last fight, but lately she has been calling me EVERY........SINGLE.......DAY sometimes TWICE a day. She has insulted me and I didn't say anything. My parents are putting up a force and is going to help me distance myself even more away from her. She can be an evil witch sometimes. Every time my sister complains about hers who is Christian and VERY nice, I always tell her, "trade places with me, then come back and complain." Thank you for the blog, it helps me to see that I'm not the only one in this world who is just as evil as mine.


yikes! 5 years ago

omg, so you mean to tell me this IS NEVER GOING TO END!??! i have a horrid mother in law who uses my husband (her son) as HER husband, HER co-parent to HER 20 year old daughter, she uses him as HER marriage referee and she even goes through his callphone records! this is discouraging for the future indeed =(


??? 5 years ago

what you going to do if you are on my place?my parents in law earn more money then my husband and still they asking for 50,100,500,1000 dollars every second day, just to make problems between me and my husband and even my kids living in hell because of that.My husband is like blind and just saying "i never going to let my parents suffer for anything,i am going to do whatever i like,every woman can be my wife but i don't have another mum and another dad"


thanks1 5 years ago

My Mother is another German b+++ch....thanks for posting everyone. She has tormented my husband since day one. And her stupid lectures about nothing. She probably sits around all day just to come up with crap to put us down with. I am thinking about writing a book about this very subject. I am so sick and tired of it. Other people think she is nice.well little do they know. I am glad I don't live close to her. You would think that she would mellow out but no.


Sourpatch 5 years ago

My monster in law is the Queen of all evil mnl. I've been with my husband for 15 years, and I'm only 32. From the day I met her, the first thing she said was " I hope your not Korean because I hate Koreans" I said "well I'm half Korean and half white". From then on they've (his whole family, mom,dad, n brother) have just been hateful n down right Mean to me. From selling my car when I was away (had my pink slip in the car signed) without my permission, to stealing all the gifts my mom gave me when I finally married my husband, n putting putting my moms gifts to me around her house..I'm talking drapes, a Asian rock lamp, sewing kit. Nice big portrait pictures, but that's nothing, while dating (their philipino) I've heard them call me all kinds if names from bruha, aswang, bi***, n they constantly remind my man that I'm nothing to them n get rid of me. I'm no angel myself, I can't stand them, they have never been nice to me. Their fake in my face, n the funny thing is his mom talks about her own sister in laws family. I am So upset because last week, i hear my mil leaving hate messages to my husband once again saying "shes nothing to us" "she's not even blood"...duh u dumbass, if I were blood I'd b his sister! But I get wut she's trying to say. Either way15 years later..I'm ready to divorce him. Cuz they'll never stop their hate for me until I'm outta the picture, n I'm so tired of trying to bite my tounge for bs.


justin 4 years ago

I've got mother-in-law problems too. there seems to be no understanding of `boundaries' with my wife's family... and having my mother in law move in after her divorce? I thought we were helping her out- but she acts like she's been helping us out as she takes up half the house with her stuff. ...and her opinions... she acts like she's older and wiser. I don't buy that. I'm not sure that making it to age 50 or 60 makes a person wiser. Not everyone's experience has the same value...


sarahb 4 years ago

I have had 10yrs of interference, she always puts herself first, sulks and has a tantrum when can't get her own way, spoiled our wedding party, was sat on the drive when we arrived home with our son and was still in our home 12hrs later. Had a big tantrum accussing me that I wasn't fit to be a mother, snatched my child from me, whilst visiting. Always assummed they were going to be invited to every event, xmas, birthdays etc. Told me I should be proud to be married to her son, a professional! Also accussed me of tricking him into having a baby! After 2nd sons birth, which she spoilt by her sulking and tantrums we received an 8 page letter of 'home truths' petty comments about "not making a space for her on the drive when she arrived". For years this has gone on. Husband seems oblivious to her, just thinks its normal for parents to get involved. Final straw has now come after he phoned her and told her every word of an argument and fight between us and she phoned my family and told them I should be sectioned. They are welcome to my husband, he would rather his kids came from a broken home than stand up to her! Silly me I thought I'd married a man not a boy!


tobenew 4 years ago

I just got engaged. My soon to be mother in law already thinks she is in control of everything. I on the other hand see exactly what's happening and have been slowly and politely putting her in her place. She keeps on telling me that this and this needs to happen at the wedding and this is the dress I must wear and I must do my hair like this and bla bla bla. I told her that we were not yet planning the wedding, but secretly everything has already been planned, and she won't be able to do anything about it. She keeps referring to her son as this super human being and that I am just good for nothing. I can't stand her and her racist remarks and that she thinks her sons are incapable of doing any wrong. She even tells me that I am fat, even though I weigh less than her and tells me that when she was pregnant she weighed 45 kgs!!! Does she honestly expect me to believe that. Everything to her is about being skinny and having money. When we told her that we would not be getting married in a church she told me that I would not be able to get a marriage certificate. She thinks I'm so stupid to think that the church issues the document. It is a legal document you idiot. hence the term mother in LAW. The list of things she says and does to me is infinite and if I have to hear one more time how smart her son his and how handsome he is, then I'm gonna barf on her. You should see the way she hangs on him. It makes me sick, because secretly I think she wants him to be her husband. (her husband died long ago) If she could have him sucking on her tits she would be happy. She forgets one detail tho...we are moving to another country and I can't wait to get as far away from her as possible. The further away she is the less she will interfere. I have been putting up with her shit for nearly 5 years. She used to tell me that at least she's not one of those mothers who interferes in her sons lives...is phoning every 10 minutes to see what you are doing, not interfering? She thinks I am a soft person she can walk over because I have never said anything in the past. I am marrying her son now, and the claws will come out, because I will not allow her to ruin my life any longer. I have already shocked her a couple of times by telling her exactly what is and what is not acceptable in her behavior towards us. I will keep putting her in her place, because she is an interfering lunatic. Am I doing the right thing?


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dainty 4 years ago

waow!it seems all over the world inLaw are just the same.i have similar issues with my mil,she expects me to call her every now and then while she doesn't call me,she couldn't even call me on my birthday not any of my inlaws called but i called her on her birthday cus my husband reminded me to on top of it all she had the guts to tell my husband that she want to celebrate her birthday on my daughters birthday which is a month interval and i really don't want dat i want my daughter to have that day to herself.funny enough she doesn't ask me if am okay with her stupid ideas its her son she calls when obviously he wont stand up to her and say No.am sick of this,and i pray not to be a bad one in future.i need help on how to make my daughter celebrate her birthday without she interfering.


sexii momma 4 years ago

Hey I have the same problem wiv mi inlaws there all jelous of me mi hubbys father is the devil himself he is a controlfreak and tellin evreyone I was holding his son hostage at our house lol the mother cryes to mi hubby to get her own way just after mi second baby fil attacked me outside calling me names going to him me and mi hubby sat indoors knowing what was going on and never protected me but blamed me for driving his father to do this I cud go on all day.mi hubby is a sissy and all his family are incest I'm in an unhappy marrige and can't get out I can't stand mi hubby.


my husbands monster 4 years ago

When i first met his mom she was the sweetest lady, i adored her and even pushed my husband to have a better relationship with her, thats when it all went bad, she became more free around me i suppose, started treating me like i was a child and she was my husband wife. She cried for months on end before and on our wedding saying she didn't know how she would survive. He is not the only child mind you. She said she doesn't want grand children because she is too young, she is 52 years anyway who does not want the grown children to have children of their own????? I think she just wants him to be free to be available for her. She manipulates hhim for money, he hardly get to do up our home becaause she cries everytime she comes over saying she wish her ex gave her everything he promised. His brother and sister are not good enough for her. Sometimes i think she wants to be his wife. He is a good man, but too soft and i blame myself for that. She plays with his emotions andd mine as well. She is just evil, i wish she would leave us alone and get on with her life. She wants to control us and wants to show me she has the upper hand. My husband does so much for her and she still critises him, i hate the way she talks down to him and makes him feel bad for everything she does not have. I wish he would open his eyes and sees that she is not as wonderful as he thinks she is. She claims to be good at everything, a spiritual woman but shes a sarcastic, manipulative bitch who just cant let the son go.


Greg 4 years ago

Your daughter looks like a troll. No wonder why your mother in law doesn't want to be seen with her


ann 4 years ago

well reading these after being married almost 23 years and I still am shocked at the mil antics and the lack of husband support. so to answer some of the newlyweds, it is never going to be over til she dies. frankly it wont happen soon enough for me. An example, I have a sprained ankle presently and living in the same town as my lovely (sarcastic) mil whom attends church every sunday and so do we have to.. and this past sunday sitting in the car talking politely with the mil and sister in law her favorite daughter a whole other story anyway she kept pushing the door closed as my arm/hand held it open like real pushing til I finally said hey....(name) don't close the door I am talking with ... and she went off all in her tantrum and my husband thought i was rude and barked and wronged HER. still today, a whole 36 hours later she calls with a trumped reason for her beloved son to call for her rescue and I ask the problem assure her it has been handled and she has to go an incoming call comes in and she hangs up. I call and correct her problem with the other person and call her back being the nice dil I have tried over and over to be, turn the other cheek and all other weekly sermons you know, anyhow, she abruptly yells at me and then has the gall to throw in " oh and I am supposed to wish you a happy birthday tomorrow so yeah, happy birthday and hung up" I share this al lwith hubby and he again turns to me and claim I DON'T TREAT HER GOOD AND IT IS ME. so the perception after 3 kids, 23 years house building, business ownings and all his mom is always going to be the one to be on top so face it, we can try to ignore it but they are evil and we can hope and pray kharma will get them in the end. I do know with my own children how not to treat my future children's spouses. If we can break this toxic cycle maybe somebody can enjoy a happy marriage. I wish I had an answer, but counselors and friends have all shared my disgust and tips but in the end the mil's have more narcistic energy to focus on hurting us than we do, so good luck and keep repeating how much we love them and its worth it, it does help to 'fake it til you make it"


Nona 4 years ago

why are both children so overweight?


Alicia Lopez 4 years ago

Nona, my chidren might be big for their ages, but my son will be 15 and he stands at 5'7", 180 lbs.; he is very fit and my daughter is growing up and slimming down! The pics definitely show my kids at their chunky stage:}

Greg, you are a complete idiot that has no place calling a 5 year old names!!! If you have to put down a little girl, who is absolutely beautiful, you should get a hobby!!! You are the most ignorant person I have come across on here! How dare you insult a child!!!! Do you happen to live near a bridge????


3voL 2 years ago

Omg. I have the same problem too. My mil is the worst of he worst. At first, she was pretty nice and babysit her first grandson. But about 1 1/2 yr of being married I noticed some changes in my mil. She started to hangout with the wrong crowd. Every Friday & Sat nights she will go to the bar & nightclubs. Or she will pretend to be sick and call out work and go out of state to have fun with her friends. During that time my FIL was sick since he had stroke. So my husband had to go to school & work out of town. I had to quit school & my job in order to take care of my baby & FIL. I swear I feel like I was in HELL running errands for everyone. Soon I found out that my mil was having an affair. Since I can hear her talking on the phone & my bedroom was next to hers. So usually my husband comes home every weekend when he is off from school & work. I told him that his mom might be cheating on his dad(who is sick and lays down all day in bed& can't talk). At that point it breaks my heart because my FIL knows but can't talk or do anything. There will be times, you'll see my FIL crying in bed & you'll know why & for what reasons he was crying about. It was 2013, when my FIL passed away. I felt relieved that he won't have to deal with my mil's crap for cheating on him. After, a month of my FIL funeral my mil remarried and sold my FIL's house and took everything. She took all my FIL's belongs which my FIL left for us plus, she took all my valuable jewelries which my family gave it to me when I got married. All my dinnerware,flatware,pots,pans, sofas,tv, beds,etc. my husband and I was left with nothing. We moved to the city and started over from scratch. That was one of the hardest thing for both of us. Til this day, I'm happythat my mil is out of our life including my 2 boy. I also thank my FIL for his unconditionally love and support even when he was sick. I guess I was blessed with an amazing FIL but unblessed with a mil who had stole from me. Either way, it's good to know that none of my kids will be involved with my mil.


Westsidegirl 2 years ago

I feel your pain, but I am dealing with not only a b**chy MIL I am dealing with a FIL and a sister in law from h**l. Meddling ....yes. Controlling yes. Telling my children that our rules are stupid and we don't know what we are doing and as long as they are at their house they can skip out on mom and dad's rules and just lie about it. What mom and dad don't know won't hurt them. My SIL is late 30's never married--never even had a boy friend if you can believe that. Calls my kids by names she picked out instead of their given names. Doesn't speak to me even at family gatherings. And that leaving you in a room by your self thing ...my husband 's family does that to me all the time. My MIL fancies her self the smartest person on the planet (actually the whole family is full of self proclaimed geniuses ) . Every time I open my mouth to say something my MIL says "you don't know what you are talking about keep quiet". She used to only do it when my husband was not around and when I would tell him he wouldn't believe me, then she got bold, and started doing it in front of him ...but I struck back. Not right there but where it really gets her. I went home printed out the facts from the computer and the next time I saw her , which was at my home ...she wouldn't even come in , she stayed on the porch , I made her read it word for word in front of my husband and then I told her "don't you ever tell me I don't know what I am talking about and to be quiet again, do you understand me? " now she just doesn't talk to me. Which is fine. My SIL likes to pretend that I don't exist and buys my children inappropriate presents that we have told her not to buy. My oldest child is from a previous marriage. My husband adopted him when he was a toddler and even though they say they "love " him he is treated like cr*p. He isn't following in the footsteps they want so they have dismissed him. My second son is the one they have claimed as their favorite. He is interested in all the things they like and they give him everything. My daughters are too much like me and get bumped too. I have their only grand kids and likely the only ones they will ever have. I have tried for my husbands sake to be gracious and nice. But they started out this relationship on a bad note when they allowed a person I did not invite to my wedding , who was told "no"when they asked and then this person cursed me out with unthinkable words and threatened me. They told this person yes...just don't tell her "the bride". At the wedding when this person shows up and starts standing in all of the pictures(not a family member) I get upset and asked what are they doing here? I was told to shut up and mind my own business. My MIL paid for the flowers for the wedding. When picking out my bouquet I wanted my mom's favorite flower included because she is deceased and it would be a nice way yo include her. They had to special order them and it would be an extra 50.00. My fiancé told me to get the bouquet I wanted he wanted me to have something to remind me of my mother. When we got back from our honeymoon my MIL presented me with a bill for the special order because that was a stupid unnecessary expense . My in laws are constantly questioning my education. Even after 16 years of being in their sons life, they know nothing about my family. They don't ask and when I try to tell them they interrupt and walk off. They are rude ignorant people. Self righteous Hippocrates. My FIL after years of teaching my children to not follow their parents rules and to lie about it , stood it my house and accused me of not being a Christian and taking my children to church. I guess this is because we don't go to his church.

Of course you are probably wandering where my husband is in all of this ? His parents are very domineering and he doesn't like to rock the boat. He tries to make everybody happy and it has caused lots of problems in our marriage. He sees how they treat me . He gets it now. He tries to stay away from them because he knows that there is Jo changing them. He told his sister with me that her behavior needs to be addressed because it is unacceptable and so far she has not responded. As for me, I have had enough of being miserable. I have told my husband that I will not spend any more of my holidays with his family. I need something to look forward to not dread. His mother purposely cooks things she knows I do not eat every single year. Last year she even went so far as to tell my husband " tell your wife she doesn't have eat before she comes I am cooking chicken so she will gave something to eat". We get there and there is nothing but Pork and Beef. My husband asked "what the heck mom". And her response was ..." Oh well I changed my mind this morning, too bad"


ms. xxxxx 21 months ago

faint

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