How To Have Lots Of Friends

Be Friendly.

I decided to compile this page in response to a hubber's request. What qualifies me to write about how to have lots of friends? As a child, you would not have called me a swan. I was the second tallest girl in the class, had allergies, a lisp (You try being one of the kids taken out of phys ed to go to speech in Brooklyn). Yet somehow, I managed to transform myself into a bicycle riding, ballet dancing, play directing, poet on the school newspaper with friends in almost every crowd. At the end of my junior year in high school we were leaving Puerto Rico to move to Mexico. A bittersweet time... My amazing best friend, Lillian Gilliken gave me a surprise going away party which to this day is truly one of the peak moments of my life. So I can say, I have made really wonderful friends.

I'm a lot older now, and maybe my nearest and dearest are fewer. Still I am able to get a party together, for myself and my loved ones, and even pull together highly attended events just by contacting my social network.

The coolest thing, is that I believe all of these people genuinely like me. I'm far from perfect, but lots and lots of people consider me kindhearted, in addition to intelligent, funny and soulful.

So here you are. It was meant to be. Visit often and let me show you a few ways to have the social life you've always wanted.

Be A Good Person.

Being a good person doesn't necessarily mean being nicey nice. It means having principles and acting on them. It means being truthful, not hurtful, loyal, helpful.

Do you look around and see people who are popular, but not really good people? Do you wish you could be like them? That's for someone else to write. This is about having friends. People you can count on and who can count on you. I don't know how old you are. I'm trying to address people of any age. It's a great feeling to have a great group of friends who can count on each other.

Be Good to Others and Let Others Be Good toYou.

If anyone has helped you in any way, reward that kindness with thank you notes, little gifts, reciprocal gestures, snacks, anything that's appropriate.

Giving and receiving are among the great pleasures of life, and the foundation of many good friendships.

Friends with Money

I started babysitting at the age of 11, because I liked having more money than my parents could give me. The advantage was that when people asked if they could borrow a dollar, I usually could say yes. Believe me, it added to my prestige.

Babysitting may not be an option in our worrisome times, but if you have any legal means of making money... like working behind a counter, in a store, organizing relatives' basements, you'll develop a self confidence that can catapult you into the major leagues.

If you're over 20, this holds even more truth. You'll definitely have more friends if you're not the one asking.

Remember Birthdays

It seems so obvious. Don't you love it when people remember yours? If you keep a list of people's b-days, and follow up with a simple phone call or an e-card, acquaintances can become friends in less than a year's time! Celebrate!

Get a Puppy.

When I was still single, my Dad kept telling me to go to the Animal Shelter and find man's best friend. I argued that I was a cat person and he argued back that you never see people walking their cats.

People who have dogs are always meeting other people with dogs. It's one of the best ways to hook up with people who are not all about themselves.

Care For the Sick

It can be as simple as zipping over with some clear soup from your neighborhood Chinese restaurant, or a committment like volunteering at a local hospital. Concern yourself for the well being of others and watch friendships grow.

Comments 8 comments

adite profile image

adite 9 years ago from New Delhi, India

How would you define a FRIEND? I know lots of people, but do all of them qualify as friends...Dont think so. As I grow older I realize that many of my so-called 'friends' are more acquaintances and fair-weather friends (I'm not saying they are to blame for this situation, I may have contributed to this ambivalence) rather than REAL friends. Friends, I can count on the tips of my fingers. Mind you, I'm happy to have a few real friends than have an address-book full of friends who are little more than acquaintances...!


Guru-C profile image

Guru-C 9 years ago Author

Dear Adite: I understand your point of view and agree with you about the value of true friends. At this point in my life, I know my friends' phone numbers by heart. But one of the hubbers requested a site on how to have lots of friends. I think kids and teenagers, even people in their 20's, need to open themselves to getting to know lots of people and treat them as friends. Later on, we get more selective because we've been with certain people through thick and thin, while others are just acquaintances or drinking buddies. I also feel that while our true friends are like our own brothers and sisters, it's good to at least try to admit new people into our inner circles. I don't have children and I certainly wouldn't like to be lonely when I enter the "third age". I hope to have a happy, bustling world of friends and relatives of all ages who can drop by at a moment's notice. Thank you so much for visiting and commenting. Let's stay in touch!


Patty Inglish, MS profile image

Patty Inglish, MS 9 years ago from North America

Lots of useful information on this Hub! Thanks for sharing.


Guru-C profile image

Guru-C 9 years ago Author

Thank you, Patty.


Gabriel Smith 8 years ago

Hey i'm a loser, i'm spending new year's eve all alone by myself. I do have a good sense of humour and i do have many friends....and many enemies...but i don't know y nothing is going on between us. it's like i know them well in school but when we go home it's like nothing no contact no nothing. what advice can u give me


Guru-C profile image

Guru-C 8 years ago Author

Hello Gabriel. First of all, you're not a loser. Second, why are you spending new year's eve alone? What about your family? (I'm Latina. We spend New Years Eve with family). Well, tomorrow is another day, just get through this one and you won't have to think about New Years for another year... Perhaps you can reach out to the people you consider your friends and wish them a Happy New Year - send them text messages or call them today. After that, you might try to do the same with the people you consider your enemies. They may turn out to be even better than friends... Let's stay in touch. Tell me more about yourself. I wish you a very Happy and Healthy New Year!!!


Guru-C profile image

Guru-C 7 years ago Author

Hi Badcompany99. I totally agree. Thank you for your kind words.


MilesBerry 5 years ago

I wasn't sure what to expect in the hub, but thought your ideas were interesting. Good hub and keep up the good work!

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