I'm 35 and Single. Is It Time to Get a Cat?

Time to Face the Facts

I've tried everything recently. I've been on dating sites. I've tried to have friends set me up on dates. I've worn a little extra make-up at the grocery store and tried to look seductive while buying cereal. The fact is, I am 35 and single. I am almost 36 now, so time is running out. Obviously, if I don't find a guy soon, I am going to be forced to purchase a cat.

There is an unwritten law that states any woman in her mid-30s without children must own a cat. Maybe the law is even written somewhere, but I haven't seen it yet. Basically, I've been pushing it this entire year thinking I could continue being in my mid-30s without owning a cat. To turn 36 and still have no boyfriend and no cat, well, that is just unacceptable.

Hallelujah, It's Not Raining Men

Since my quest to find a man has obviously failed, my next quest must be to find the perfect cat. In all honesty, all I really want is someone that looks forward to seeing me come home from work and wants to cuddle while I watch TV. Sure, a man can do that, but he'll just whine if I want to take over the remote control. Do cats do that? No.

A cat will chill out with you and watch whatever you want to watch on TV. The cat is just happy you are there and feeding it. Take out a laser pointer or some catnip, and that cat is happy for the rest of the night. Is a man that easy to please? No, of course not. So a cat is so much better than a man, right?

The kittens are starting to come for me!
The kittens are starting to come for me! | Source

Acceptance is Key

So I've accepted my fate. I may as well go to the shelter this weekend to find my little Midnight, or Snuggles, or Garfield. Of course, then I have to feed a cat. The cat is going to leave cat hair all over my couch. Then, I'll have to vacuum all the time. Even worse, I'll be forced to have a litter box. I'll need to clean that all the time, too. When am I going to find the time for all that? After all, I am single, so therefore, there is no man helping me pay the bills. I will then have to start working longer hours just so I can pay for the litter, food, vet bills, cat toys, etc. What little free time I have will be spent cleaning after the cat. I will be lucky if I have time for television at all. I guess the cat will watch TV by herself.

Of course, then the issue will be that Kitty is lonely. While I am working all those long hours and cleaning during all of my free time, the cat will be neglected. This means I will be forced to buy another cat to keep the first cat entertained. Great. That means more food, more litter, more cleaning, and more money being spent. However, this is the life of a single woman, so I must accept it. After all, at least people are polite enough to no longer use the term "spinster." Everyone just simply recommends getting some cats. That is way better, right?

Books on Cat Care

Crazy Cat Lady Status

Once I have two cats, I am sure I will have a new reputation as having a "cat friendly" home. In a sense, the way marijuana is the gateway drug for harder drugs, one or two cats is the gateway to Crazy Cat Lady status.

Oh yes, it starts out simple enough. Oh, just one cat or two cats. No big deal. There is no cat addiction. Everything is normal here. A friend or two drops off a cat so you can catsit for them, but they never return to pick up Fluffy or Skittles. The cats start multiplying like Gremlins being feed after midnight. The next thing you know, you've got 20 cats milling around. Your neighbors are complaining about the odor. Your family is trying to have an intervention. No man will come near you at the grocery store, so now you'll never get a date. You have become the Crazy Cat Lady!

Well, Maybe Not

Come to think of it, I really don't want a cat at all. Also, I kind of don't want a man ruining my good time either. I rather like being single. I can do whatever I want, and don't have a man or cat bothering me. I can come and go as I please. I can watch whatever I want on TV. I don't have to clean up after a cat or a dude. What a great life!


Copyright ©2012 Jeannieinabottle

Does Amazon ship cats now?
Does Amazon ship cats now?

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Comments 209 comments

Marlena Oechsner profile image

Marlena Oechsner 4 years ago from Wisconsin

Thank you for making my day! This hub is hilarious! I love how you relate one cat to marijuana, like being a gateway into craziness. Excellent writing. I too have faced the inevitable thought of becoming a crazy cat lady. When I was single in my 20s, my stepsister and I watched the episode of CSI where the cat lady dies and the cats eat her face because no one finds her! (And no one feeds the cats.) We used to joke that I would turn into that. But instead of buying a cat, I advocate for buying a dog. You have to walk them, so it's a great way to get exercise (and meet cute guys with dogs too). Go to the nearest park, play fetch with your dog, and watch the guys roll in! :)


Marie-Grace profile image

Marie-Grace 4 years ago from Travelling, Always

So good, so much fun! I'm allergic to cats, so I'm probably required to become a crazy dog lady.


ThoughtSandwiches profile image

ThoughtSandwiches 4 years ago from Reno, Nevada

Jeannie...

Cat addiction? What cat addiction?? I can quit anytime...

This is very, very funny and a great way to greet the day!

Thanks,

Thomas

PS...that was you looking seductive in the cereal aisle? I was gonna come over...


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa

OMG! You're 35 and single and don't have a cat yet? You should be picking out Mr. Mittens' little brother or sister by now! Hilarious hub, coming from a person with three cats (and husband and dog). Voted up and funny and sharing with my Facebook friends.


alocsin profile image

alocsin 4 years ago from Orange County, CA

Great fun and I applaud your decision to remain catless! Voting this Up and Interesting.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Marlena - Oh, that story is so creepy. I do not want to be the crazy cat lady and the cats are forced to eat me. I do have a hamster, but only one. For now, I would say I am not the crazy hamster lady. I could see myself becoming the crazy bird lady though if I had more free time.

Marie-Grace - Yes, an allergy to cats means you must become the crazy dog lady. I think that is a law, too. :-)

ThoughtSandwiches - Sure, sure, everyone says they can quit at anytime. Admitting you have a problem is the first step! By the way, I was wondering who was watching me while I decided between multi-grain Cheerios vs. plain Cheerios. Come on over next time. :-)

Deborah - I know! I am so behind in everything. I guess I am a late bloomer with starting my "cat family." Thanks for the vote up and for sharing!

alocsin - Thank you for accepting me the way I am - totally catless! Also, thanks for the votes, too!

Thanks everyone for the comments!


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 4 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Stay single and catless, my friend. What we need in this country is a "Rent a Man" service. Seriously, you only need men a few hours a week at the most.

I'm drawing up a business plan now. Nobody steals my idea, right?


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 4 years ago from California

Highlarious! Entertaining hub!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Austinstar - Let me know when you have your "Rent a Man" service up and running. Sometimes I just need stuff repaired or I need someone to bring me chicken noodle soup and sympathesize with me when I am sick. I hope you have different types of men to rent such as "Mr. Sensitive," "Mr. Nice Guy You Can Introduce at Family Functions," Mr. Repair It All & Kill Spiders," etc. Great idea!

AudreyHowitt - I am glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for dropping by!


Sara Sweeney 4 years ago

Very cute - I don't even like cats and I enjoyed reading the whole thing ;)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am happy you enjoyed it. Cats are cute, but I just don't think I need one right now. It is tempting sometimes though. At least a cat will be around when I need him. Thanks for reading and for the comment!


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 4 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Ha! I just wrote the hub http://hubpages.com/business/Calling-all-men-How-m...

I need volunteers to offer suggestions on how to proceed.

Thanks for inspiring me!


Lisa HW profile image

Lisa HW 4 years ago from Massachusetts

Very funny Hub. After a lifetime of never being catless, a couple of decades or so of adding kids, a dog, and additional cats here or there; I'm now an empty nester whose last little birdie brought her two cats with her. So, I've been cat-less for awhile now. It has taken quite a while to get used to not finding surprise vomit mornings, being able to leave doors open, and not shuffling around in order not to step on a silent cat.

Recently, I've been thinking about how maybe I'd like another little friend around, but I do have two neighbor cats who visit and leave - so that's kind of enough. I don't know... As much as I like kitties, there's something really GREAT about being cat-less and free as the birds certain cats have been known to murder and leave on the back porch as a gift. As an empty nester, I figure I'm at extremely high risk of becoming a cat lady. Then again, no I'm not because I'm not going to let that happen. Enjoy your cat-less-ness. They'll always be cats waiting for you (and any hats you may want to put on them) when you're an empty nester.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi, I love the way you talk yourself out of getting a cat! lol! this was so funny! of course men leave bits of their hair on the couch too, and they get man flu! at least with a cat you can just drop it of at the vets to be made better! maybe a dog? haha!


Gordon Hamilton profile image

Gordon Hamilton 4 years ago from Wishaw, Lanarkshire, United Kingdom

Hi,

Interesting thoughts and it is definitely worth getting company. Having been single again these past couple of years, I don't know where I'd be without my four legged friend - a dog. Funny, my ex used to say that cats were women's pets and dogs were for men. I don't know the ins and outs of that but I do know I have a major cat phobia, so she may have had something there!

Whether you go down the road of cat, dog or man, I hope you at least find the happiness and contentment you seek :)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Hey JIAB - Hilarious - I have a sister who will appreciate this too:) lol She is 33 and there are cats clawing at her door! Seriously - and I told her not to feed them...she is...not a good sign! lol


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Austinstar - What a great hub! I hope you find some dudes willing to work for the new company. I am wondering if you can add Mr. Bouncer or Mr. Security. I like to go in scary neighborhoods sometimes. :-)

I feel honored that I inspired you and shared your hub with my followers. Thanks!

Lisa HW - For now, I think I am staying catless. They really are cute, but much like children, they are even cuter when they belong to someone else. I am really am considering getting a fish tank again though. I already have a hamster. With fish and a hamster, it would be like a cat restaurant in my apartment!

Nell Rose - You are right! Men do leave hair on the couch, too. That is why I tend to date men that shave their heads... it helps! Hehe. They sure can be messy though.

Gordon - Thanks! I am not sure what is best - cat, dog, man, or just neither of those things. It is fun to just look around at Petsmart, but not buy. Maybe that is all I will do next time I am lonely.

RealHousewife - Wow! She could write an even better hub about fighting off the urge to become the cat lady. It is as if they are beating down her door and calling to her. That is pretty hilarious. Thanks for sharing that!

Thanks everyone for the comments!


ThoughtSandwiches profile image

ThoughtSandwiches 4 years ago from Reno, Nevada

Jeannie...

Yes...That was me. I was crouched behind the croutons. APPARENTLY...Walmart has a policy of frowning on crouton crouching and I was thrown out of the store before I was able to make me move. You looked good.

Thomas

PS...Prior to the "unfortunate incident" with Wal-mart security...I was rooting for the plain Cheerios. I am a purist.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

So that was you! I can't believe it. You are part of the reason I was forced to write the Walmart Etiquette hub! I thought you were just hanging out in the aisle blocking people from buying croutons. Wow! That is amazing.

Oh, and thanks by the way. I really try to take my look to the next level when buying Cheerios at Walmart. I went with the extra tight pair a sweat pants that day and my nicest pair of fake Uggs. Glad you noticed. ;-)


ThoughtSandwiches profile image

ThoughtSandwiches 4 years ago from Reno, Nevada

Well that was the problem...everyone all of a sudden wanted croutons. You can imagine my embarrassment. I planned on regrouping (mentally, I mean) and approaching you in dairy...but then I was nearly arrested...

Oh yeah...I noticed...

Thomas


adrienne2 profile image

adrienne2 4 years ago from Atlanta

Jeannie, You are way to funny. When I started at the beginning of the article my heart felt sad. I thought gosh I am 49 and aint looking for the cats!! I like the way you ended the article, (btw he will find you) if you ever decide to receive a gentlemen. Voted up!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

ThoughtSandwiches - Well, perhaps we will meet at another time. We just were not destined for Walmart... maybe Target? :-)

adrienne2 - I am glad you didn't feel sad by the end of the article. I just think it is funny what society expects from women. I am not too worried about meeting a guy anymore. I suspect I will find the perfect cat before I ever find Mr. Right. That is OK for me. :-) Thanks for the comment!


ThePracticalMommy profile image

ThePracticalMommy 4 years ago from United States

Sure you don't want a cat? I have a few hanging out around my house I'd be glad to send you! ;) Funny hub! Thanks for the laugh!


cclitgirl profile image

cclitgirl 4 years ago from Western NC

I looked through the comments halfway expecting to see men lining up just so they could get a look at your fantastically hilarious hub! So sweet and so cute...oh wait, I may be talking about the cat. Such awesome humor - I love this! Voted up and Thanks for SHARING!


rasta1 profile image

rasta1 4 years ago from Jamaica

I must warn you, I am a Lion!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

ThePracticalMommy - Thanks for the generous offer, but I think I will pass. My co-worker is even giving away a cat, but I decided against it. Thanks for dropping by and for the comment!

cclitgirl - I thought maybe I would get some offers, too, but it looks like most guys would prefer I just buy a cat. At least Thomas a.k.a. ThoughtSandwiches was stalking me at Walmart. It is nice to have a fan. Hehe. Thanks for the vote up!

rasta1 - Uh-oh! Well, thank you for that. Maybe that is what I am missing... I need a lion instead of a housecat. :-)


Greensleeves Hubs profile image

Greensleeves Hubs 4 years ago from Essex, UK

Good funny hub Jeannie, but you spoiled it all in the first paragraph. You said:

'The fact is, I am 35 and single. I am almost 36 now, so time is running out.'

I am single. I saw 36 a long time ago. Now I am depressed. Shame on you.

Maybe I'll get a cat.


Kris Heeter profile image

Kris Heeter 4 years ago from Indiana

Enjoyed your hub and share it with my following hubbers!

I had cat when I was single and it was because of her that my husband and I met (and he ended up being VERY allergic to her!). So she brought be "good guy" karma - it was actually because of her that we met. He (husband) is more neat and tidy than me, so no cleaning up after him :)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Greensleeves Hubs - Sorry I depressed you. But it is OK! You totally don't need a cat. I suggest a nice fish tank. They don't leave hair on the couch. :-)

Kris - Wow, it is as if a man and a cat can't live in the same place! It is nice that she brought good karma though. You are really lucky he is such a neat guy.

Thank you both for the comments!


Greensleeves Hubs profile image

Greensleeves Hubs 4 years ago from Essex, UK

Maybe I'll get a fish tank, like you suggest

But maybe I won't keep fish in it. They take a lot of maintenance to keep them looking nice. Maybe I'll just have an empty fish tank and keep the cat in it.

That way it won't leave any hairs on the couch.:-)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

That's a brilliant idea! Maybe I will give that one a try, too. ;-)


nextgoodthing profile image

nextgoodthing 4 years ago from Miami,Fl

Sense of humor is the key to live a longer life.Maybe full of cats? who knows?! Great hub, thank you for the fun reading it


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas

Jeannie.. I just kept snickering to myself while reading this and then after all you just talked yourself out of both man and cat.hehe... funny thing is you will probably end up with both! Seriously, though.. I can relate to everything you wrote and I really enjoyed your hub. Thanks for sharing :0)


mljdgulley354 profile image

mljdgulley354 4 years ago

Had to vote up and funny. I too liked the way you talked yourself out of having either a cat or a man around. Both are nice to have around sometimes and other times they can be a pain like most of life. Sometimes it is good and other times you wonder why you got out of bed.


Faceless39 profile image

Faceless39 4 years ago from The North Woods, USA

Voted up, funny, and awesome. You are freaking hilarious, and I love your story. Well written and such a fun thing to read. You have a new follower!


WD Curry 111 profile image

WD Curry 111 4 years ago from Space Coast

You will have more luck hanging around the beer. Make sure to bend over and get something out of the bottom of the freezer to increase your odds.

Please don't go on dating sites. It comes along when you aren't looking. If you start turning over rocks, you will just find snakes, lizards and insects.

Cats don't really like you. They know how to work the gig.


Jackie Lynnley profile image

Jackie Lynnley 4 years ago from The Beautiful South

I have had a cat 16 years, what's that tell you? lol

Fun hub!


Perspycacious profile image

Perspycacious 4 years ago from Today's America and The World Beyond

With all the cats that would love to have a home to call their shared abode, please find one that is in danger of being euthenized (sp?) and share its 9th life. It will love you for it, and automatically reduce the likely male suitors by the number of those you run across who are allergic to cats (mother-in-laws of that variety, too!) And, frankly, you will soon love the cat enough that it will become "Love me? Love my cat" time.


rlaha profile image

rlaha 4 years ago from Spartanburg, SC

Cats are great pets contrary to dog lovers' beliefs. They are loveable just like dogs and some of them even think they are dogs. You should get one before you find a spouse. You will find that sometimes they can be more comforting than people at times.


cclitgirl profile image

cclitgirl 4 years ago from Western NC

I also have to add that my sis-in-law was a crazy cat lady last Halloween. It was *awesome*. She got all these stuffed animals that were cats and attached them all over herself with velcro. Hehehe. She's single. So, I have to admit, I have to giggle. She also does have two real cats. :D


Rachel Richmond profile image

Rachel Richmond 4 years ago from California

Haha!! Gremlins!! I love your hub..I hope that you get all you desire in your life and never settle for anything less! You won't be the cat lady. :)


stricktlydating profile image

stricktlydating 4 years ago from Australia

Yeah! Being single is kinda fun!


instantlyfamily profile image

instantlyfamily 4 years ago

Thank for the laughs this morning. But it's funny how life works out...as soon as you decide that you don't want a man or a cat, Boom, there is a stray cat at your back door and a good looking single man moving in across the street. Good luck!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

nextgoodthing - Yes, my sense of humor has gotten me through a lot. Thanks for reading and I am glad you liked the hub.

Jamie - Thanks! I am happy you liked the hub. One of the guys I was dating a few months ago told me if the two of us got a cat together, I couldn't be a crazy cat lady. However, he didn't last. Glad I didn't get a cat with him!

mljdgulley354 - I have to agree with you on that. Sometimes pets and men can both be a pain, but sometimes either is nice to have around.

Faceless39 - Thanks so much! I am glad you enjoy my hubs. Thanks for being a new follower, too.

WD Curry 111 - That sounds like a good idea. Maybe I need to linger around the liquor store with a low-cut shirt on. Thanks for the idea! Honestly, there are some decent guys online. I work with 4 different people who met their spouses online - perfectly normal people, too! So there is hope. I just prefer to take a break for now.

Jackie - That is a long time to have a cat. I guess they do make great companions. 16 years is quite a while!

Perspycacious - If I do decide to get a cat, I will get one that needs to be adopted. Petsmart always has shelter cats and adoption events. They try to lure me in when I am buying food for my hamster. So far, they haven't gotten me yet!

rlaha - I can imagine a cat can be as much fun as a dog at time. Also, they do seem as if they would be comforting pets. Maybe one of these days I will get one.

cclitgirl - That sounds like a hilarious outfit. I might try that one year. Uh-oh... two real cats already? Don't let her get anymore! Hehe. :-)

Rachel - Thanks for reassuring me. I don't think I could be a cat lady since I am too cheap to even get one cat. If I ever win the lottery though, who knows what could happen!

sticktlydating - Being single is really fun sometimes. Every now and then, it can be a nuisance though. Sometimes it is more fun to be in a couple.

Thanks everyone for reading and posting comments. I am really surprised this hub has become this popular. I suppose there are many single women considering getting cats. :-)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

instantlyfamily - I am happy you enjoyed the hub. Maybe you are right. Perhaps I will find a stray cat and a man will approach me because I've found his missing cat. You never know! Thanks for the comment!


Angie Jardine profile image

Angie Jardine 4 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

I have had assorted husbands and assorted cats all my life (the cats that is) and if I had to choose ...

Hmmm, better not tell you, just in case my old man finds out .... lol ;)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Hahaha... I think I know where you are going with that one. I am still think a cat wouldn't try to steal the remote control and that seems like a plus to me. Thanks for dropping by my hub!


Simone Smith profile image

Simone Smith 4 years ago from San Francisco

TOTALLY LOVE THIS HUB. Hahaa, it made me kind of look forward to future cat ownership, but much like you, I am rather happy being single AND cat-less. Things are good! Hahaa, I'm feeling that way even more so now that I've started giving dating a try, though I'll be keeping it up if only for the lulz.

You rock, Jeannieinabottle!


American View profile image

American View 4 years ago from Plano, Texas

I cannot believe Thomas is trying to take credit for my many hours of stalking and I cannot believe you spotted me, I must be slipping. LOL :) I know about the cat thing but forget it. Get a dog, they are more loyal, obedient, and cuddle. The dog will be happy to see you when you come home, even if you only went outside for a minute to get the mail, but to the dog he thought you were gone forever. Just a suggestion.

Voted up and across the board


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Simone - I am glad you enjoyed the hub so much. I became inspired while eating lunch with co-workers that have actually had success using online dating sites. Amazing! So yeah, they were saying I should get a pet and then I realized it is expected of women to do just that. Thanks for the compliment and dropping by my hub!

American View - So it was you! I can't believe it. So I take it you were stalking me, and Thomas was stalking you since he knew all the details. Wow! This is incredible. I don't need just one man when I am getting all this attention. Thanks for the votes, too! I feel so loved!


one2recognize2 profile image

one2recognize2 4 years ago from New York

Now I know where to go whenever I need a quick fix(laugh). Loved this, crazy cat lady. lol...


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thank you! I am glad you enjoyed the hub. Now, I must go pick out some cats the pet store...


rlaha profile image

rlaha 4 years ago from Spartanburg, SC

@Jeannieinabottle: Please take pictures of your cats and post them :). I would love to see them.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

rlaha - I don't have any cats. After all, I decided at the end of the hub not to get any cats. I do have a really cute hamster though. I might buy some new fish, too. :-)


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 4 years ago from California

Went back and read this again! So funny!


Marcy Goodfleisch profile image

Marcy Goodfleisch 4 years ago from Planet Earth

Clever and funny hub! Just so you'll know, you have to clean up the shedding fur and the dirty litter box with men, too. Trust me on that one.

Votes up and funny.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Audrey - Thanks for coming back to read my hub again. I am happy you like it so much!

Marcy - Yes, I know you must clean up after men, too. The good thing about cats is they can't argue with you about it. Hehe. Thanks for the votes!


WebsiteConfetti profile image

WebsiteConfetti 4 years ago from Australia

Funny hub! I received a cat mug for my 30th birthday last year.. was it a hint haha


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I think you are right. Someone was trying to tell you something. Thanks for dropping by my hub!


rlaha profile image

rlaha 4 years ago from Spartanburg, SC

Hi Jeannieinabottle: Oh that's too bad that you didn't get a cat after all. That's alright though! I'd love to see pictures of your fish and hamster :).


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

rlaha - I have a hub about my last hamster and my new hamster named Mimi. You can find it here: http://jeannieinabottle.hubpages.com/hub/As-the-Ha... There are photos included. :-)


Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 4 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

Jeannie ~ I LOVED this. Your writing is awesome. A great balance between fact and humor. I hope that you continue your happiness no matter "what" is in your life. I currently have two cats. But I am much older than you, ha.

Sharyn


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thank you so much! That is such a compliment. I try to be humorous about things, but sometimes I am very frustrated. I am definitely thinking cats might be better than a man at this point. :-)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Jeannie...I would not be the one to advise in this case. I love cats, have 2 and think everyone, regardless of age & lifestyle, should have at LEAST one. Problem being, it is quite true that one cat leads to 2...leads to....Your hub is great, funny as heck and I loved it. Seriously, I'm thinking..."Aquarium" for you. Yes? No? Peace!


SJmorningsun25 4 years ago

Oh, Jeannieinabottle . . . you are too funny! Love this Hub. I'm a bit younger, but in my family I'm already on the older side to still be single. So, I got a dog--I get unswerving devotion, someone who is always thrilled to be with me, and for whom every day is the BEST DAY EVER. It's fantastic. :-) Here's to the single life! Just be you, and if Mr. Right ever comes along, he'll know. And if not--well, you don't need him. You are more than fantastic on your own! Cheers!


Charles Hilton 4 years ago

I'm 51 and single and loving it. I just lost a dog and I have one left and her and my two grown kids are all the companionship I need---until they move out and leave me all alone. lol. Then maybe I'll get a bird. :P

Excellent hub, as usual. :)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

fpherj48 - Cats do seem to be quite nice. They might just be better than any man. I do think if you go past two though, it can lead you down the path of a starring role in the show Animal Hoarders. An aquarium... that might be a good idea!

SJmorningsun25 - Dogs are quite fun and very loyal. In my apartment building, we are not allowed dogs. I am not sure if I would want the responsibility in an apartment anyway. If I had a yard though, I could be talked into getting a dog.

Charles - It is pretty awesome being single. Of course, with two kids, I am sure you are not along anyway. Birds are great pets though. You might just be onto something. Thanks!

Thanks everyone for the comments!


TIMETRAVELER2 profile image

TIMETRAVELER2 4 years ago

Never, never, never, never...NEVER GIVE UP!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thank you, TIMETRAVELER2 for your inspirational words. So far, I haven't given up yet!


amymarie_5 profile image

amymarie_5 4 years ago from Chicago IL

I'll be 37 in a few months. I have two cats. Really I do. LOL. Don't worry Jeannieina bottle, love will find you. Cat or no cat!

Lots of people marry young out of desperation and end up being miserable because of it. Sure, a lot of people have stereotypes about us single 30 something girls but I don't like those people much anyway!

Rated all ups!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks for the votes up! It is true that many people do marry and are completely miserable. I just think it is funny when people find out I live by myself, they recommend a cat. Hehe.


amymarie_5 profile image

amymarie_5 4 years ago from Chicago IL

Yep, I know what u mean! How do u think I ended up with my first cat? Mom not only suggested it, she called the vet she uses and asked them to call her if someone brought in a stray, lol


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Wow, it was like you were being initiated into a group or something. Maybe there is a law that states your mom has to find a cat for you once you are a certain age.


amymarie_5 profile image

amymarie_5 4 years ago from Chicago IL

Lol!! I should look into that! I was 32 when she decided I needed a cat! I gotta admit after I saw her I melted. She was so tiny and cute. Then I adopted her brother later so she could have someone to keep her company since I'm hardly home. Now in single, 36 and have two cats. Im a cat lady and it's all my moms fault!!!

Thanks for making me laugh! I needed it!!!!!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I'm happy I could make you laugh! Yes, I have to say, it is kind of your mother's fault. It is a good thing my mom isn't an animal person. She thinks my hamster is plenty enough. :-)


Lilleyth profile image

Lilleyth 4 years ago from Mid-Atlantic

Very funny hub, I chuckled all the way through.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am glad you enjoyed it. I am actually dating someone now. I am starting to think having a cat would be easier. :-)

Thanks for reading and thanks for the comment!


mattdigiulio profile image

mattdigiulio 4 years ago

It's always time to get a cat!


aethelthryth profile image

aethelthryth 4 years ago from American Southwest

Very much enjoyed your Hub. I had a conversation like this with my best friend. I ended up getting ferrets when I was 34. A year later, I was married. I noticed that most of my friends who liked my ferrets got married themselves shortly thereafter. And most of my friends who hated the ferrets, didn't. So my husband and I have been meaning for some time to write a dating book called "Ferreting Out Mr. Right." We figure it's at least as good a strategy as most dating books out there.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

mattdigiulio - I didn't realize anytime was a good time to get a cat. Maybe you are right. Thanks! :-)

aethelthryth - I've never heard this theory before, but you might just be on to something. Perhaps I should have bought a ferret all along. I do own a pretty darn cute hamster though. I bought my first hamster about 6 or 7 years ago though, so maybe a ferret brings better luck. Thanks for sharing!


Sonya L Morley profile image

Sonya L Morley 4 years ago from Edinburgh

This is so great, I love your style of writing and had a chuckle reading this article, good job!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much, Sonya. So far, I am now 36 but still don't own a cat. :-)


rmcleve profile image

rmcleve 4 years ago from Woodbridge, VA

I'm in my mid-20s, am in a relationship, and have a cat! Although I understand everything you're saying, I just want to put in a shout out to all the awesome, loving, sweet cats in the world. Dogs, too! We have 3 dogs and a cat and I wouldn't have it any other way.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

You being in a relationship helps a lot. You can have a cat and 3 dogs, but you won't be known as "the cat lady" or "dog lady." It is all about being in a relationship. :-) Hehe. It is funny the stereotypes about women and cats. It really means nothing, but it is funny to acknowledge it sometimes. For me, I have an awesome hamster and that's enough. Thanks for checking out my hub!


rmcleve profile image

rmcleve 4 years ago from Woodbridge, VA

That's hilarious! Hamsters are great. Whatever makes you happy makes me happy! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!


TimFellow profile image

TimFellow 4 years ago from The Universe

I always thought it was easy for a girl to find a relationship. Maybe that's not the case.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Sorry, Tim, that has not been the case. There is a major dude shortage on the east coast. I guess maybe it is not difficult to find a relationship... it is difficult to find a good one. :-) Thanks for the comment!


bravewarrior profile image

bravewarrior 4 years ago from Central Florida

Funny and so true! I have 3 cats and I'll take them over a man any day! You can't train men and you still have to clean up after them and handle their "feces". Cats love you no matter what and you don't have to get all gussied up for them!

Voted up and funny. I LOVE funny!! Now I'm going to hit the follow button. You can thank billybuc for that!


Perspycacious profile image

Perspycacious 4 years ago from Today's America and The World Beyond

It has always been difficult, even perhaps part of the divine design, to find a good relationship that will be lasting and satisfying. If the extent of the concerns is "35 and Single", I can point to some bigger concerns we all have (you included) which may have some greater priority. What is more, by getting a cat you are probably ruling out a good relationship with a person allergic to that variety of feline, thereby narrowing further the already narrowing field you describe.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

bravewarrior - You are so right! You never have to get too dressed up for a cat. Also, it is probably easier to clean up after them. They are way nicer than men in that respect. Thanks for checking out my hub! :-)

Perspycacious - I can't figure out how others find men so easily. It does seem like it is always guilty. And you are right... I am on online dating sites and a lot of men are allergic to cats. Very few are allergic to hamsters, which is the pet I have now. Thanks for sharing!!!


Perspycacious profile image

Perspycacious 4 years ago from Today's America and The World Beyond

Find the non-controller by skipping a day or so of communicating online and seeing what happens. The non-controller will forgive and forget. Good fortune with the dating scene. It would be easier, wouldn't it, if God just pointed and said "That one!"? You might try an actual photo here on HubPages instead of the caricature (on a boardwalk?)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks, that is good advice. Actually, I've been so busy lately I have not been able to login, so maybe that will help. As far as my profile photo goes, I am not trying to meet anyone here on HubPages and my identity needs to be concealed for personal and work reasons. Oh well. Guess there will be no HubPages hookups for me! :-)


Chris Hugh 4 years ago

I enjoyed your article. It was funny, uplifting and well-written. I liked it a lot.

Muffin, Puffin, Sprinkles (don't ask how he got that name), Snowbubbles, Roycroft, Princess, Miss Felinia, Stinkerbelle, Graymalkin and Sir Purrsalot, however, did not.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am happy you enjoyed the hub. I am sorry the cats did not. I am sure the cats have a saying like, "I am 35 days old and single. Is it time to find a human?" Hehehe. Thanks for the comment!


Lil Miss Reader profile image

Lil Miss Reader 4 years ago from Somerset New Jersey

I loved this! I have a cat and often fear that my unwillingness to get married or have children will lead me to become a crazy cat lady! I hope not, but I've come to accept the possibility that itmay happen. Who knows.

Thought this was very funny and enjoyed it thoroughly. Thanks!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! I am happy you enjoyed the hub. I am now 36 and still catless. I am breaking all the rules! :-) It is tough sometimes because I am pretty sure a cat would be nicer to me than most of the men I date. I still have not ruled out the crazy cat lady possibilities for me. Thanks for the comment!


bravewarrior profile image

bravewarrior 4 years ago from Central Florida

Trust me on the cat vs man thing, Jeannie! I have 3 cats and haven't found a man yet who's as loyal, loving or undemanding!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I definitely believe you on this one, bravewarrior!


Glimmer Twin Fan profile image

Glimmer Twin Fan 4 years ago

Ha Ha! Very funny hub. I got married when I was 35 and I had a cat. My husband got me and the cat as a package deal.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

That is a win-win situation right there. You get a husband and a cat! :-) Thanks for checking out my hub.


Docmo profile image

Docmo 4 years ago from UK

Jeannine - you need to change your dating sites. I am sure there are many men out there who are better than cats ( just about) Who would want to miss out on an articulate, funny, warm, intelligent ( is it working yet?) person ... voted up of course!


DanaTeresa profile image

DanaTeresa 4 years ago from Ohio

GOOD FOR YOU! Embrace the single life. Until of course you meet that person you deserve. I would give you some advice on meeting Mr. Right, but I am as cluless as it gets...

I CAN give you some cat lady advice. I was having dinner with four girls and all of us have cats! None of us married. All in out 30's. We came to the conclusion that 2 cats is ok. Three and you are entering crazy cat lady zone.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Docmo - Hahaha... I've tried so many dating sites. It is scary out there! But I refuse to give up. ;-) And thanks for the compliments!

DanaTeresa - OK... I will go with that. 2 cats are OK; 3 cats are for crazy ladies. For now, I am embracing the single life. Thanks so much for the comment and the encouragement!


calculus-geometry profile image

calculus-geometry 4 years ago from Germany

Somewhere I saw a map of the US color-coded by sex ratio. If you have a dude shortage in the East, I suggest moving to Nevada or Wyoming. Even if you don't find a man, you can get a puma out west.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

My problem might very well be a location issue. Of course, a puma might be a better choice anyway. Thanks for the suggestion!


bravewarrior profile image

bravewarrior 4 years ago from Central Florida

I guess I belong in the crazy lady brigade 'cuz I have 3 cats!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I think the concern is once you have 3 cats, you are more likely to lose all control and keep taking them in. As long as you stay at 3, you are fine. :-)


bravewarrior profile image

bravewarrior 4 years ago from Central Florida

Nope, 3's the limit. I've had friends try to sucker me but I stood firm!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Good for you! 3 is usually a lucky number anyway. :-)


lezsaysit profile image

lezsaysit 4 years ago from New York, NY

I'm a fan..........O:)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! Glad you enjoyed it.


Grant N.Z profile image

Grant N.Z 4 years ago from New Zealand

Very Good. I can't understand why you are single , you have a great sense of humour. I really enjoyed this hub. You don't need a man or a cat. Cheers and good luck . Grant


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! I am starting to think you have the right idea. I don't need a man or a cat... both would drive me nuts. :-)


carol7777 profile image

carol7777 4 years ago from Arizona

I loved this hub. You are so funny. However cats are very sweet and I love my two boys. Animals are work and responsibility..but worth it.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am happy you enjoyed the hub. I think cats are probably way easier to live with compared to a man. I just might get one yet. A cat, that is. :-) Thanks for dropping by!


danielabram 4 years ago

My recommendation: get a fish and call it Charlie.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

You are so right. I used to have a fish named Finley and then a fish named Bubbles. They were both pretty awesome. Thanks for the recommendation. :-)


RunningDeer profile image

RunningDeer 4 years ago from Iowa

Hilarious hub! The title caught my eye right away. You should get a dog :) Up and shared!


sen.sush23 profile image

sen.sush23 4 years ago from Kolkata, India

Jeannie, I voted the hub funny, but realized immediately that it was way too useful to put down as light humor! Woman, you have put your finger on the spot...the struggle we in our 30's (and later than 30's) need to put up to prevent our time with the t.v. from being tampered with! I think you have done a service to our fraternity by setting an example with your freedom fight! Good luck to you. By the way, what do you say to a Gold fish? He can only ogle, and not interrupt when you talk... :)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

RunningDeer - Thanks so much! I am happy you enjoyed my hub. Dogs are cute, but for now, I think my hamster is the best pet. Thanks for sharing and voting up!

sen.sush23 - Why, thank you so much. Yes, I feel as if I do have a single gal crew. It is fun being single, and you are right, it is awesome having full control of the TV at all times. :-) You are right about the goldfish, too. I've had betta fish before, and I think a new fish might need to come into my life. Thanks for the comment and the vote!


jpcmc profile image

jpcmc 4 years ago from Quezon CIty, Phlippines

Really funny. Who knows, you might meet someone as you pick out your cat. Just don't wear too much make up. It might scare the cats. Just crossing my fingers. :)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Hahaha... thanks for the advice. Too much makeup would probably scare the men away, too. :-)


kittythedreamer profile image

kittythedreamer 4 years ago from the Ether

You are stinkin' hilarious, Jeannie. Seriously. Voted up and funny. I want to be the old lady who walks to the mailbox in her bra and yells obscenities at the police...with a snake wrapped around my shoulders. :)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! You would be really cool if you went to your mailbox with a snake wrapped around your shoulders. Maybe we can be neighbors. I will be the lady with birds and hamsters all over the place.


jojo29 profile image

jojo29 4 years ago from CA

Lol..you are really hilarious. I liked your hub!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thank you so much! I appreciate the comment.


mythbuster profile image

mythbuster 4 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

And a laugh was had by all who read this hub... I am still laughing (I like the pic and caption, "Does Amazon ship cats now?"). I like the ending of this hub - woo hoo - for singles! Laughing so hard I am not even making sense here and can't think clearly so I will go finish laughing it off... thanks for sharing, voted up!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! I am glad you enjoyed it. It is so much nicer being single without a cat sometimes. :-) Thanks for voting up and thanks for sharing!


christin53 profile image

christin53 4 years ago from UK

Very funny :) There are a lot of advantages to being single and catless having the bed all to yourself is one :)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

You are so right. My hamster never tries to curl up in bed with me. If she happens to escape, she hides somewhere else and lets me have the bed all to myself. Thanks for the comment!


Faceless39 profile image

Faceless39 4 years ago from The North Woods, USA

You are so funny and have such a natural, inborn talent to entertain and make people laugh. I love reading your hubs!

That said, you will find someone when you least expect it. Really. So just get your cat and live your life, and "he" will eventually just show up one day. :)

Thanks again for a fun time. This is one of the very few times when I've both re-read a hub and re-commented. Voted up, funny, and awesome.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thank you so much! That is such a compliment to hear your read my hub more than once! Thanks for the votes. I think I am now in the state of mind of "Whatever happens happens." There really is no point in looking for a decent guy. I am having no luck finding one, so maybe one will find me instead. Thanks again!


prairieprincess profile image

prairieprincess 4 years ago from Canada

This is hilarious! I love how you come to a place of acceptance at the end. Maybe your life ain't so bad, after all, right? And believe me, as a cat lady myself, the litter is definitely worth reconsidering! Great hub. Voted up and sharing.


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK

I'm 40, single and have two cats! All my life i've tried not to conform to stereotypes. Damn!


Wesman Todd Shaw profile image

Wesman Todd Shaw 4 years ago from Kaufman, Texas

I'm getting really close to turning 39.....I've about ditched the notion of marriage....or even having a live in girlfriend.

I really just want one to spend some quality time with......where I'll find her, I've no idea. She might not exist.

Oh, and I want a dog...AND a cat :)


davenmidtown profile image

davenmidtown 4 years ago from Sacramento, California

jeannieinabottle: What an awesome hub. I am 45 and single and am owned by two cats. Frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way. Not all of us are meant to be coupled... some of us are meant to have cats instead....


Annette R. Smith profile image

Annette R. Smith 4 years ago from Orlando, Florida

What a fun read, and something I can relate to. When I finally stopped looking, the man AND the cat found me ... at 42. We've been married for nearly five years, and we've welcomed another cat into our family.


Nat Amaral profile image

Nat Amaral 4 years ago from BC Canada

Cool hub. There's nothing wrong with being 36 and single (or in my case, 38 and single). Not to mention that some animals make better company than people (not just men). I know that since I used to have a cat, and I'm thinking about getting another. Shadow (a black cat I once had) was great company--she died almost five years ago, and I miss her. I often see friends with cats, and they always put a smile on my face.


JayeWisdom profile image

JayeWisdom 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

You may want to consider adopting a pet rather than buying one--especially from a pet store (which keep those horrid puppy mills in business).

I became single again later in life and got my first pet--a dog--at age 61. She is a wonderful companion, loyal and gives me unconditional love. She's also a good watchdog. (And she doesn't snore!)

Jaye


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Yo...Boy Toy....I'm watching you.....Going on 39 is NO excuse for not thinking about getting married......you just never mind, Texas boy....She's right around the corner....cute little Southern girl.....blonde, big green eyes and a big ole hook in her pocket to catch herself a young stud who plays GEE-tar and writes stories.......Careful...I'm a stalker. I hear everything!! hahahahahahahahahah


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

prairieprincess - Thanks so much for checking out my hub and for sharing it. Yes, I agree life isn't so bad without a cat or a man. As it turns out, dating 3 men at once is more fun than just settling for one anyway. Who knew?

Peanutritious - It is OK. Two cats are still not conforming to anything... yet! Just don't get too many cats and you'll be fine. :-) Thanks for the comment!

Wesman Todd Shaw - There are so many single people out there, so obviously, it is not all bad. And I agree... a cat and a dog might be a good idea. Thanks for checking out my hub!

davemidtown - And some of us were meant to have hamsters. I think I fall into that category. :-) Thanks for the comment.

Annette R. Smith - I've heard some people say to stop looking for a man and it will happen. However, I stopped looking for a man for years and they stopped looking for me, too. For now, I am being proactive with the situation. But it is still fun being single and maybe that is the real problem. I am happy for you and your husband and cat. Maybe that is what I need... both! Thanks for checking out my hub!

Nat Amaral - You are so right. So many animals are better company than humans. Right now, I am happily waiting for my hamster to wake up for the evening. We are sharing a salad together tonight. She is happy just to have a carrot. Men are so much more demanding than that! Thanks for checking out my hub!

JayeWisdom - If I were to get a cat, I would adopt one. But for now, I am cat-free and happy. :-) I know someone in a similar situation... she got two dogs for the first time ever after becoming single. They make her quite happy. I do think one might snore though... ;-) Thanks for the comment!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Uh-oh, Wesman Todd Shaw, I think you are being watched by fpherj48. Her last comment on here is clearly geared at you. Look out!


Mr. Happy profile image

Mr. Happy 4 years ago from Toronto, Canada

"In a sense, the way marijuana is the gateway drug for harder drugs, one or two cats is the gateway to Crazy Cat Lady status." - I was thinking one or two cats would be the gateway for witchcraft. That would be pretty good too because then, You could just use spells to find whomever You wish.

"I can do whatever I want, and don't have a man or cat bothering me." - I agree here. I suppose that is one of the reasons why I started practicing celibacy and abstinence over a decade ago. Well, I wasn't thinking about men bothering me, more like the ladies (LOL).

I got a fish about five-six years ago. Even fish tanks need cleaning though and my fish only eats other live fish so ... ya, not even fish are responsibilities free. And You are certainly not going to cuddle with a fish, unless You like hangin'-out inside aquariums.

I enjoyed the read. Thank You for the laugh!

Good luck on your adventures.

Cheers!


cathylynn99 profile image

cathylynn99 4 years ago from northeastern US

i married for the first ime at 52. he was 59 and never married. we are very happy. never give up.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Mr. Happy - Haha... I am not sure two cats are the gateway to witchcraft, unless maybe they are black cats. Perhaps it would be more fun to go that route anyway. :-) Fish tanks can be a pain, but I am thinking it might help to have one again. Of course, they aren't that cuddly, are they? Thanks for checking out my hub.

cathylynn99 - Thanks so much for sharing that info. Maybe I will get married at 52, too. It will probably take me that long to find someone I actually like. :-)


Wesman Todd Shaw profile image

Wesman Todd Shaw 4 years ago from Kaufman, Texas

Oh I need as many EFFERs as I can get to look out for my lonely old bones :)

I've certainly got a Lady picked out....but I've yet to convince her of how she can't live without me....the story only gets stranger if I say more though...:)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

It does all sound a bit strange, but I won't be nosy and ask for details. I will just have to wait for you to write a hub about it. :-)


kimberlie33 profile image

kimberlie33 4 years ago from Brooklyn, NY

Great hub! Really cute.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! I am happy you liked it.


livewithrichard profile image

livewithrichard 4 years ago from Charleston, SC

Very funny stuff here Jeannie... I love the way you use logic to talk yourself out of becoming that Cat Lady. I feel for you too, being single does have its advantages but so does being part of a couple. Here's an idea, if you talk yourself back into wanting a man, get a dog... Not a breed that is going to stay small or be a lap dog. Get a dog that is going to be a beast. One that you can walk in the park or along a lakefront and be the envy of every guy that passes. Guys love girls that love dogs, they only tolerate girls that own cats. Trust me, it will not matter what you wear or how much makeup you have on, the dog will be the catalyst to your romantic endeavors.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I love that phrase - Guys love girls that love dogs, they only tolerate girls that own cats. Dogs are great pets, too, but for now, I am sticking with my hamster. She is just too cute! :-) Thanks for the comment!


DDE profile image

DDE 4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

Awesome and hilarious thanks for this Hub you certainly know how to keep your reader to the end of the article.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! I am happy you liked it!


isenhower33 profile image

isenhower33 4 years ago from Crothersville, IN

If you find the right guy you wouldn't have to worry about cleaning up after him or fighting for the remote cause some guys don't care about what's on tv. I explain this whole dating scene in my girls vs. love. While single can be fun, but going out to experience the world is only as good as the person you have next to you. Without that person to share adventures with its not as great as it could be. I like the hub though :) good idea on it....


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks for your comment! I have determined that is a pretty good way to figure out if a guy likes me... if he actually cares about what is on TV, then he is not that into me. :-)


Jenn-Anne profile image

Jenn-Anne 4 years ago

Fun hub! What a great read! Aside from cat hair and litterbox clean up there is one other peril about cat ownership that you failed to mention - the very real possibility that your cat might try to kill you, as cats are known to do. ;o) Voted up and sharing!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

You are so right! I never realized how much cats were out to kill humans until reading your hub. :-) I will have to be very careful if I do decide to get a cat! Thanks for checking out my hub.


Thundermama profile image

Thundermama 4 years ago from Canada

Oh my did I laugh out loud when I read this. So glad you have decided not to become a crazy cat lady and are enjoying your single status. Gateway...still laughing, so funny.


Justsilvie 4 years ago

So funny! really enjoyed it... I am also one of the scratch the cat and get a dog bunch... great conversation starter in the park.


NMLady profile image

NMLady 4 years ago from New Mexico & Arizona

LOL!! BTW I didn't find my hubby until I was 50!! And we have a great life..... Altho, I was cat person from the minute I met my first cat as a toddler!!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thundermama - Thanks so much! I am happy you liked the hub so much. And yes, no cats for me... yet! :-)

Justsilvie - That is so true... dogs can help in the park. What guy is able to walk past a gal with a dog? ;-) Thanks for your comment!

NMLady - That is great! That means it is worth waiting for the right man. Thanks for your comment and thanks for checking out my hub!


Kaili Bisson profile image

Kaili Bisson 4 years ago from Canada

This is a hoot! Thank you so much for making me laugh out loud on a cold, rainy November night.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am glad I could brighten your day. It is starting to get cold and dreary out there, that is for sure. Thanks for your comment!


ElleBee 4 years ago

Love this, definitely made me start my morning with a laugh!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am happy you liked it. I am 36 now and still no cat! :-)


shiningirisheyes profile image

shiningirisheyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

Fantastic, funny, hilarious, strong, insightful and absolutely made my day with this hub!!!

I am voting up and then I am sharing!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much for the vote up and for sharing! I am happy you really liked it. :-)


elle64 profile image

elle64 4 years ago from Scandinavia

cats are lovely- I have two- and a husband a 2 kids- Cats are easy to live with easier than any man!!!!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I imagine it is much easier living with a cat rather than a man anyday. So far, I might just be better off without both of them.... although lately I am leaning more towards getting a cat. ;-) Thanks for your comment!


bat115 profile image

bat115 3 years ago from Los Angeles, CA

Funny, I'm the male version of this hub!


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am glad you liked it. It is nice to know there are guys that feel the same way.


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Dolores Monet 3 years ago from East Coast, United States

Jeannie! By not getting a cat you are missing out on all the benefits - leaving your house with a read end full of fur, always having a cat story to bore your friends, coming to the realization that cats are totally the smartest and most beautiful creatures on this planet. That's what happened to me!


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Yes, it is certainly the rear end full of cat fur that I miss not having the most. :-) I've noticed this on other cat owners and I always look at the cat hair with envy. Hehe. Thanks for the comment!


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CarissaHolly 3 years ago from Argyle, Texas

You need a Louie. Not my Louie, but his twin. lol


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Haha... nah, I think I am quite alright for now. I am not even responsible enough for a fish right now.


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MJennifer 3 years ago from Arizona

This is the funniest, funnest hub I've yet had the pleasure of reading. I met my own husband on horseback. I suggest skip the cat, get a horse. When did a white knight ever ride up on a CAT?


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

You are so right! Horses are way better than cats anyway! Thanks for checking out my hub. :-)


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Sue Bailey 3 years ago from South Yorkshire, UK

Much older than you Jeannie. But I have resolved to stay single and catless for the rest of my days. Mind you my daughter got a really cute ginger tabby the other day who I might borrow; anyone got a man I can just borrow too?.....


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I don't blame you. Borrowing a cat seems like the best idea. For now, I am completely petless and pleasantly surprised at how nice it can be. I am, however, in a relationship right now, so that is pretty rare. He has a puppy, so that seems like plenty enough for me. Thanks for checking out my hub!


Sue Bailey profile image

Sue Bailey 3 years ago from South Yorkshire, UK

Good luck with the relationship!


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thank you!


AnelaKini 3 years ago

I'm newly 38, single, and have always been a crazy pet lady. :D


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

There is a lot to be said for being the pet lady. I should just become one, too! Thanks for your comment.


Blond Logic profile image

Blond Logic 3 years ago from Brazil

Funny stuff. Hey, you're livin' the life. Most people want what you have. Don't get sucked into the propaganda.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Hahaha... thanks! I am even completely pet-free right now... not even a fish! It is nicer than I thought it would be. No cats anytime soon for me!


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justmesuzanne 3 years ago from Texas

Well, you've got it all wrong! In the first place, you can't "own" a cat! You can only cohabitate with a cat! Additionally, you don't get a cat. They just come to you when the time has arrived. For every year past 35 that you remain single, a cat will come. I should know. I have 15 of them! Every time someone moves out of my neighborhood, they leave at least one cat and it comes to live in my yard, eat my cat food and sleep on my insulated, heated cat porch in the winter! (Complete with love seat, cat tree and comfy beds.)

Voted up, funny and shared! :)


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I never realized a cat would show up each year after I turned 35. I did have a woman at a festival just put a kitten in my arms recently... I was able to get away, but I do think the cats are coming for me. I was able to resist, no matter how cute that kitten was that day! Thanks for the votes and thanks for sharing my hub!


sheilamyers 3 years ago

You had me laughing so hard my sides hurt. I'm older than you and still haven't found Mr. Right. And yes ... I'm heading toward that crazy cat woman status. I think. Two cats are all I can handle so you walk into my house and not be able to move without stepping on tails.


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I am happy you enjoyed the hub. I think you are safe with just 2 cats. Once you get past 3, that is when people start to get concerned. Thanks for checking out my hub!


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FlourishAnyway 3 years ago from USA

I went off the deep end with the cat thing as a child. We lived at the end of a cul-de-sac in the country where people would drop the poor things off. We'd keep them, spay and neuter them. I grew up surrounded by a plethora of other people's unwanted cats that became my own. We had 5 acres. It was heaven. Now I live in suburbia and have my own large brood. I love the critters. They are mythical, magical and clean up after themselves. Men are human.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I have family members in the same situation. Cats just show up and make themselves at home. They are sweet little animals. They seem more appealing as pets each day. :-) Thanks for your comment.


AlwaysTrue2Myself profile image

AlwaysTrue2Myself 3 years ago from USA

Very entertaining!


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Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! I am happy you liked my hub.


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leni sands 3 years ago from UK

How did I miss this - what a brilliant hub, cheered me up no end today. I have been a 'cat-lady' all my life so the dilemma didn't hit me at 30 or 35 although at 50 I suddenly became the proud owner of two...


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Hey, two cats still doesn't sound like too many. I am happy this hub cheered you up. Thank you so much for dropping by and thanks for your comment!


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TarrinLupo 2 years ago from Peterborough NH

I love cat ladies, embrace it girl.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much! :-)


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 2 years ago from Wales

I loved this one ;Brilliant !!!Now looking forward to many more by you. By the way I am now a cat owner or rather I am owned by two rescue cats mum and daughter and love them to bits. Great work and wishing you a happy weekend.

Eddy.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Thanks so much, Eddy. I am glad you enjoyed it. I am not single anymore, but now I want a cat more! I think it is to counterbalance my fiancé and his dog!


sassypiehole profile image

sassypiehole 2 years ago from the ATL

LMAO - I got married (the FIRST time) when I was 35 and I bought HIM a cat before telling him to hit the road. Of course, she lives with me and my current husband now.

Careful what you wish for; cat's are so much easier to manage than husbands! ;-)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Indeed... I am engaged now and still catless. Now I want to get a cat because he has a dog. Then the cat, dog, and fiancé can all ignore me and do whatever they all want anyway. Hehehe. ;-) Thanks for your comment!


sassypiehole profile image

sassypiehole 2 years ago from the ATL

Well, if its any conciliation... I have a cat, a dog, a husband, two fish and a 6-year-old. The cat is now psychotic and losing all of her hair because of the dog (and the girl), and the husband hasn't remembered an anniversary/birthday, etc. in ten years.

Like I said; careful what you wish for! ;-)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Wow, I will keep all of this in mind. Sounds like fun over there. ;-)


sassypiehole profile image

sassypiehole 2 years ago from the ATL

It's a BLAST! Especially when the dog sticks her head in the litter box for an afternoon snack! *Shivers* ;-)


Rae-LeighDawn profile image

Rae-LeighDawn 2 years ago

I'm 36 and single AND I live with my mom. (we have a cat) .. ironically I have only recently discovered I am worth waiting for the right person.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

That is not so bad... only 1 cat. For that matter, you and your mother share the cat, so it is like you have 1/2 a cat. You could get a couple more and you'd still be OK. ;-)


Rae-LeighDawn profile image

Rae-LeighDawn 2 years ago

LOL ..thanks ;)


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atlantichorizons 23 months ago from Wilmington, NC

This is awesome! I have been there. The cats did help. The only problem is that once you get in a serious relationship, he has a dander allergy! Well, needless to say, Sammy, Kasey and Travis weren't going anywhere! He had to get some allergy medication.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 23 months ago from Baltimore, MD Author

I don't blame you. It is much better for him to get some allergy medicine than to try to learn how to live without the cats or the guy. Thanks for checking out my hub.

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    Jeannie InABottle (Jeannieinabottle)1,161 Followers
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    Jeannie has been writing for HubPages for over 5 years. She covers a wide variety of topics - anything from hamsters to office work.



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