Ways of Improving Personality:
Effective personalities are not developed in a night, so to speak. Each person desiring to improve his personality must strive to equip himself with a program of self-improvement and must stick to it no matter what. Through patient application and effort, one can develop characteristics that we have judge as attractive or unattractive in others and which we can adapt in our own behavior patterns. Some of the positive steps to take if we wish to improve ourselves are the following:
1.Self-appraisal- Begin by listing down and evaluating your physical, intellectual, social and emotional traits in terms of effectiveness, ineffectiveness or partial effectiveness. You may use a personal rating sheet.
2. Effective regulation of emotional life- One must develop a high degree of control over one’s emotion and not allowing one’s emotions to control you. Negative or unpleasant emotions like fear, envy, pride, etc. should be checked or sublimated; the positive emotions like joy, love, reverence, etc., should be developed.
3. Social relations – One should be capable of social intimacy – forming friendships and participating in social relations that are deeper than mere acquaintances. Social competence consists of being able to actualize one’s own needs. Relations with others should not be exploitative, manipulative or artificial but must be characterized by mutuality and genuine respect and affection.
4. Work- One must be committed to some form of work that is satisfying as well as economically good. Keep busy and indulge in worthwhile hobbies.
5. Love and sex – One must be able to forego personal gratification, even sexual gratification, to satisfy the loved one. Love consists of thinking more of other people rather than one’s own self.
6. Self – One must have a positive regard of one’s self as a distinguishable of the world he lives. One should have a well-developed ego identity and should know who he is, where he is going and should have an inner assurance that he will be recognized and accepted by those who count.
7. Philosophy of Life– One should live by a philosophy of life that should give direction to one’s actuations. One good philosophy is ‘to do well, to de good, and to be liked”, i.e. living simply with no splash, or glamour, or notoriety, striving little for social or economic gains. Another good one is: “To see God in everything you do.” The Bible contains many golden passages that can enlighten or guide one’s life.
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