Infidelity Among Men And Women Society Weighs In

Should Women Come Terms With The Fact That Some Men Cheat?

Man Trying to Talk To His Wife.
Man Trying to Talk To His Wife. | Source

Introduction:

Is infidelity accepted among men? This article is surrounds the topic of infidelity and how some women view the matter at hand.

What's Good For The Goose Is Good For The Gander!

Woman Holding Clip board
Woman Holding Clip board | Source

Two Can Play That Game!

I used to stay up late at night eavesdropping on my parent’s conversation. Through the thin walls separating our bedrooms, I overheard my dad telling my mom, that she had to deal with his infidelity in order to make their relationship work.

That’s how men are!” Is what he would say. But what bothered me the most is that my mom constantly put up with my dad’s philandering ways.

I was nothing like my mother, she was passive and quiet; she rarely spoke a word. I took after my dad, who was bold, and unapologetic for his unsubtle behavior. My promiscuous nature was also inherited from my dad as well.

My mother continually reminded me that men can go out into this big vast world and have all the sex they want, because this is a “man’s world.” However, a young lady must keep her legs closed and her heart open towards submission.

My mother’s advice went in one ear and out the other. I refuse to be a doormat for men like my dad!

I enjoy sex, similar to most men. And due to my heavy sexual appetite, I’ve been called every bad name imaginable, by men who thought that I was one of those women who idly stand by and keep quiet. Nope! Two can play that game.

Men are studs when they sleep around and women are known as sluts. I believe that the same societal judgment should be applied to women as well. I don’t understand Why Is It publicly acceptable for men to sleep around? Signed,

(O.S.)Outspoken Slut, & Proud of It!

Think Before You Hop Into The Sack!

Hotel Bed.
Hotel Bed. | Source

The Problem.

Dear… Lady, it’s not wise for men or women to sleep around. I can think of three reasons off hand:

Research indicates that the following STD’s plague those who engage in sex with multiple partners.

1. Sexually Transmitted diseases: Gonorrhea (1.4 million each year (1.3 men to every woman. This disease is caused by direct contact with infected mucous membranes and secretions in genitals mouth and throat.

Syphilis -130,000 each year (1.3 men to every woman) Caused by direct contact with ulcers of someone with active infection.

Chlamydia- 4 million each year (1.3 men to every woman) the cause of this disease stems from direct contact with infected mucous membranes.

Genital Herpes- 30 million affected; 500,000 each year (2 women to every man) The cause stems from direct contact with an active sore or virus containing genital secretions which can lie dormant for months in some cases years.

2. Pregnancy- You could end up pregnant by a guy you don’t know or like. And as for men, you could end up impregnating a woman who will come after you for child support. (Note: eighteen years is a long time.)

3. Bad Reputation: Defend your reputation. After all, you don’t want Outspoken Slutengraved on your headstone.

Solution

If you feel the need to sleep around perhaps something more could be going on mentally. Contacting a health professional that you can talk to about your energetic physical desires could be of help.


Million-Dollar Cheat Deal

Have It Your Way Jerry Weintraub

The Truth About Infidelity

Lust can happen in a seemingly good relationship. The desire to please the flesh over commitment can torment the soul.

According to research, the temptation is acceptable in a large city. In smaller towns infidelity is not accepted.

Relationship doctors share that 50 percent of all married women are residing with a husband who has or will eventually cheat. Many experts claim that the number could be higher. Do to shame many men will not admit to having an affair.

However studies suggest that women are catching up to men. Some women are having affairs on the job.

Trying to Get Even

Many women and men who have been cheated on feel victimized to the point of getting even. In a studies show that the majority of women are emotionally hurt by the thought that their husband shared a meaningful relationship with another woman.

While men are most hurt concerning the physical nature in which their wives were involved with another man.

Women communicate verbally, the details that their spouse may have shared with another woman is heartbreaking. Later on some women began beating themselves up mentally.

Why Men Cheat

Men feel betrayal differently from women. For men there is a sexual desire and adventure.

Some men desire the attention from another woman, other than their wife. Many men view infidelity as an escape. And some men feel that it is acceptable.

Why Women Allow Cheating In Their Marriage

Many Women Allow Cheating in their marriage, due to low self-esteem, not believing that they are capable of finding anyone else, they allow the infidelity.

Is It Possible To Stay With A Spouse Who Cheats?


It is possible to stay with the spouse, if you are willing to forgive. Forgiveness surrounds trusting that your spouse is not lying, learning not to doubt your spouse, and truly accepting his/her apology.

However, the jilted spouse has to really believe through constant reassurance that she/he will never be hurt again, and this could take a while.

Emunah La-Paz

Emunah La-Paz

The Cheating Poll

Is It Publicly Acceptable For Men To Sleep Around?

See results without voting

Why Do Married Men Cheat With Unattractive Women? A Book About The Handling Infidelity Within The Boundries Of Self-Control, By Emunah La-Paz

More by this Author


Comments 9 comments

dashingscorpio profile image

dashingscorpio 2 years ago

Life is a personal journey.

Most women (do not approve) of their men sleeping around. Women have called such men "dogs", "low life", and "no good". I've yet to meet one woman who thought it was "cool" for men to sleep with as many women as they wanted. However lots of men (don't care) what women think!

Most men also do not approve of their women sleeping around. Men have called such women "sluts", "whores", and "skanks". However lots of women (do care) what men think!

Essentially neither gender approves of the other behaving this way. However the major difference is (women will attack other women) for being promiscuous! Men on the other hand do not attack other men!

In recent decade there has been a cultural shift among women. Better birth control methods and better career opportunities with higher pay have made it possible for women to be more independent. In fact according to an AARP survey it was revealed that (women) initiate the filing of 66% or 2/3rds of all divorces in the U.S. Apparently when one has options they put up with less crap.

Another major change in society is many women are becoming more like men when it comes to sexual activity. The young girls are taking queues from their crop of celebrity idols with regard to using their sexuality (Rihanna, Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, and even Beyoncé has started incorporate more overt sexually aggressive moves in her act.)

Anyone who has ever watched an episode of the TV shows (Cheaters, The Maury Povich Show AKA "You are NOT the father!", and Paternity Court) is keenly aware that neither gender is standing on holy ground when it comes to cheating. Even lesbians have been known to cheat!

I have yet to meet a man or woman who thought it was okay for the significant other to have sex with others unless they were in an "open relationship".


swilliams profile image

swilliams 2 years ago from Arizona Author

Hi Mr. D.S. As usual it is great to read your insightful and professional aspect. I do have a question, are you saying that society feels that it is acceptable for women to cheat? We all know that there was a time when men could have multiple wives an concubines, which has evolved into mistress in these times. I've never heard of women being able to do the same thing. Not that I condone either side.


dashingscorpio profile image

dashingscorpio 2 years ago

I guess it all depends on how one defines "society".

My main point is women make up more than 50% of society and I have never met a single one of them who thought it was (acceptable) for their mate/spouse to have a mistress. If over half of the population (disapproves) of something it's difficult to assert that "society" feels it's acceptable.

The reality is each of us can only control ourselves. Although we can't stop someone from cheating on us we do have the ability to control whether or not we continue to invest our time in the relationship.

As far as the days of multiple wives and concubines that was an era where women were for the most part on the same level as property. They weren't allowed to attend school, vote, or make any major decisions. In some Arab countries little girls are forced to have their clitoris removed with the idea being that they're not likely to cheat if they do not receive pleasure from having sex. In the U.S. we consider that barbaric!

I believe there is a difference between (accepting) something and feeling (powerless) to do anything about it. Even when the bible speaks of divorce it does so from the (male) point of view by listing the reasons (he) is allowed to divorce a woman. Obeying the law during that era meant they believed they were following (God's) law.

Men wrote the bible and just about every other religious doctrine which explains why women were not viewed as equals. Gradually countries started moving away from being "religious states" to being more progressive. A woman from biblical times would be blown away to see that a woman is the president & CEO of General Motors or all the other successful women like Oprah who own businesses where they hire and fire men.


mts1098 profile image

mts1098 2 years ago from InsideTheManCave

in relationships where mutual communication and trust exist - it should not be okay for either gender to sleep around


swilliams profile image

swilliams 2 years ago from Arizona Author

Thanks Mr. D.S. I have been running into many women who keep holding on to their cheating spouse or waiting for them to return or leave the other woman as if it's normal. As you said it all depends on that individual person. It just seems as if men still have the power to have their cake and eat it too.

Mts1098 I do believe the key is to invest in a relationship that has mutual communication and trust. These qualities are very hard to find.

Thanks for your feedback.


csmiravite-blogs profile image

csmiravite-blogs 2 years ago from Philippines

What I notice is that both men and women cheat. More of the men, than women. Both would try to hide it, but once out in the open, women tend to be more forgiving than the men. Men could not tolerate cheating by their wives, and would react more violently, if they found out. It would take so much for the couple to save their relationship, if incidences of cheating happens.


swilliams profile image

swilliams 2 years ago from Arizona Author

This is an interesting acknowledgement most Men cannot tolerate cheating by their wives, and most women are so forgiving. Sometimes I wonder if it has to do with self-esteem. Thanks for your feedback Csmiravite-blogs!


dashingscorpio profile image

dashingscorpio 2 years ago

swilliams, You may be onto something with regard to the lack of self-esteem possibly being the reason why women are more willing to forgive men who cheat. I've known women who would rather have a "no good" man than to not have a man at all. Most men on the other hand would kick their cheating wives/mates to the curb.

Having said that I have also seen several instances where women got pregnant while cheating and the husband stayed with her and raised the child as his own. These "family secrets" are more common than you would imagine. Some people don't have any "deal breakers" when they're "in love".


swilliams profile image

swilliams 2 years ago from Arizona Author

Mr. D.S. I agree. I think there is a man shortage in the world which causes women to compete with one another. Women were built to be loving, however when they start fighting over men and doing whatever it takes to keep a no-good-man it seems desperate. However I have seen men who stay with women who have cheated and having another man's child. I don't know what to think of that. It's very complex to me.

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