Marriage and Money: Partnership Is What Matters Most

Hubbers Responded Overwhelmingly

This hub is based on a question that I asked in the question section. You responded overwhelmingly to the question: In a marriage, does the man (husband) have to be the main money earner? More than thirty responses poured in. I believe it is important that I share the results because you felt so strongly about the question. Responses came from both married and single people. I know this because I read your profiles – although all did not indicate their marital status. A few Hubbers expressed themselves very well, which I will share who they are in a moment.The majority of the responses indicated that a marriage is a partnership and that the financial responsibility rests with both. Certain factors determine the level of financial support of either spouse:

  1. Ability
  2. Education
  3. Occupation
  4. Culture - Era
  5. Non traditional thinking

Less popular responses to the question are (the main money earner):

  1. It does not matter
  2. Matters to the man
  3. The Man should be the main money earner

I want to get back to your responses and go one by one and discuss the five determining factors taken into consideration to handle the financial matters of the family.

Couples Partner To Make Ends Meet

Finances Drive A Marriage
Finances Drive A Marriage | Source

Do Both Spouses Contribute Financially To The Household?

See results without voting

Five Points That Determine Marriage Income

Ability

In order to earn a living, we all must have a skill or ability. Ability is they type of skill we have to accomplish an outcome. We all wish we could have the ability of a great athlete, celebrity or superstar. But we know that there are only a small percentage of people who have ability to reach stardom. In a marriage, the more ability you have combined, the greater chance of income earning you have. Each partner must learn something. Learning is a part of growth. Ability creates a force in the marriage that drives your destination. Complacency only leads to death.

Education

Education refers to the level of education attained. Have you graduated high school, college, post-graduate degree or doctoral degree? Have you gone to trade school or a professional school? Education is a tool to become more knowledgeable about a particular subject that you are interested in. Since education can be delivered in several formats, there is no excuse for lack of education. There are online classes, elearning, distance learning, teleseminars, teleconferences and face-to-face learning. You can go to trade school, community college, four-year college or university, master’s program and doctoral studies.

Occupation

How important is occupation in a marriage? When you married, did you take into consideration the occupation that your spouse chose? I think this is very important. If you are thinking about marriage, do you even know what your potential spouse occupation is or even desires to be? Most important, are you and your spouse working on improving their occupation. In our recent economy, many employees have been downsized, layed-off and fired from their jobs. Many small businesses have shut down and large corporations have cut back. Many people have had to reinvent themselves. Find new jobs and refocus their future plans.

Do you know what your career options? Now is time for new learning and retraining. What have you always wanted to do? Your career decision highly impacts your marriage. No one wants to be married to an unmotivated unambitious individual. Marriage is for people who want to grow together and change the world with their ability. I know of many couples that have similar lines of careers: business, teachers, lawyers, law enforcement agents and preachers. Having similar fields of interest can make for a stronger bond. I am not saying that you cannot have different kinds of careers to have a successful marriage. It is something to think about. If you have been married for many years now, you might want to come together and team up for increased earning potential. Ever thought about working on the same project? Then there is the traditional occupation thinker, ladies must be nurses and men must be police officers. Think again.

Culture

I grew up in a home where my mom was a Homemaker; in it’s true sense of the word. She cooked breakfast for my dad as he went off to work. She also made his lunch. He worked in a factory for many years. Many of her girlfriends did the same thing as she. They stayed home, raised the children and took care of the needs of the house – cooking, cleaning, washing and taking care of husband. My dad was the chief of the house – he made most of the money. My mom worked a few odd jobs, and was skilled. So I learned by example the role of a mother and father at home. I think the notion that we can not live on one income is invalid, because many families did years ago. We want more material things today, we desire more. We have access to more stuff.

Non-traditional Thinking

Many hubbers expressed that the old way of thinking is not acceptable today. The man does not have to be the breadwinner; in fact, many male hubbers welcome their wives to make more money than they. In fact, it was bogerk who received the most votes; Wayne Brown and GetFitRight gave some very insightful responses that were well thought out.  All responses are appreciated.

Let me know your thoughts and Vote Up if you like this Hub!

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Comments 16 comments

Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

heart4theword, thank you so much for your comments and discussion on family income. Men do set an example for their sons when they become fathers; and men set an example for their daughters of what to look for in a man.

I think when everyone, both Male and Female do their part - the best they can do, pool their resources and place it all in God's hands we will live more financially fulfilling lives.

Good response, Thanks!


heart4theword profile image

heart4theword 5 years ago from hub

I agree with you in that the Male doesn't have to be the main bread winner. Yet I feel that men, should make enough money to be able to pay the mortgage and the main living expenses...giving them a great feeling of accomplishment that they are providing for their family. Also being a good example to their children on the responsibilities and working together as a family. As you said: "Marriage should be a partnership,"...not a dictatorship:) Excellent hub topic!


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

Thanks crystolite, you say, ".....important piece of of work." I appreciate you today!!!!


crystolite profile image

crystolite 5 years ago from Houston TX

Useful and important piece of work which am glad i came across.Thanks for sharing this good and wonderful tips.


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

SJKSJK, yeah, money is a huge factor in marital fights. Money is always an uncomfortable subject, especially when you lack. If you were not taught about money growing up, chances are, you will have lots of money problems -- married or not.

Thanks for making your comment on this hub, appreciate you!


SJKSJK profile image

SJKSJK 5 years ago from delray beach, florida

Probably the most common reason that married couples fight is over money. You make some good points. Good Hub.


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

Hi Smaridge01, it would be ideal if we were trained before marriage. Some couples start out with expectations, hopes and unrealistic dreams. The interesting thing is, marriage is a lifelong learning process because nothings stays the same. We can all learn something from each other.

Thanks for your voice of this matter!


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

Thanks Happyboomernurse, I value the opinions and feedback from the hub community. The responses to this topic of Marriage and Money came through very loud and clear. You say marriage is a "loving partnership" -- I agree. We must agree on what is important, and money is of utmost importance. It is our values that cause us to use money the way we do.

Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!


Smaridge01 profile image

Smaridge01 5 years ago from Florida

Good hub TOH. This is an important subject, one we should probably all be trained on BEFORE we get married! lol

Thanks,

Wayne


Happyboomernurse profile image

Happyboomernurse 5 years ago from South Carolina

Great hub. I think it was cool that you researched the issue right here on hub pages. Thanks for sharing the results. I believe marriage is a loving partnership and that the division of labor needs to be jointly agreed on based on what each partner brings into the marriage, but love and values are paramount.


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

Teddletonmr, I agree with you. We married people have to love each other more than money. Money brings couples together and draws them apart too. These are some trying times, let's try and work together. Thanks for commenting on this "good article" as you say.


Teddletonmr profile image

Teddletonmr 5 years ago from Midwest USA

Good article, Marriage And Money: Partnership Is Most Important, You Said So.

The love of money, rather than each other can only end badly for us all.


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

Hi dotty1, you raise a good point. Onegoodwoman mentioned something similar in her response to the question. We want to get the most out of money. I think if we combine our skills of managing money we will be better off. For example, the "Saver" makes sure we save and the "Money Manager" -- one who manages bills, do the budget. One of the things I try to do is, keep cost and expenses down. I think we can all use a little help when it come to managing money. Thank you so much for stopping by!! See you round.


dotty1 profile image

dotty1 5 years ago from In my world

this is a great hub ...money is a bit of a nitemare to sort out in marriage....yet I think it is men that want to be in control...??I might be wrong


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan Author

Thanks ssaul. You responded to the question too. Thanks for the being the first here. Money issues are a big problem in marriage -- you said 90%. You raise a very good point -- money problems take a toll on one's mental health. This is the very reason we should be trying to reinvent ourselves. We need new knowledge for new jobs. I think we shoud also realize that it takes time to re-build. Patience is important too!


ssaul 5 years ago

nice hub, you got that right money for me is really essential in my marriage especially in this economy! money most of the times cause 90 percent of the problems in a marriage which in turn take a toll on one mental health

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