Online Affairs- The Cheaters Playground!

Online Cheating

  • 57% of people have used the Internet to flirt. (Greenfield and Rivet - Internet Use & Abuse Survey 1999).
  • 38% of people have engaged in explicit online sexual conversation and 50% of people have made phone contact with someone they chatted with online. (Greenfield and Rivet - Internet Use & Abuse Survey 1999).
  • Evidence proves there is a high correlation between on-line cybersex and subsequent real-time sexual affairs. (Greenfield and Rivet - Internet Use & Abuse Survey 1999)
  • 31% of people have had an online conversation that has led to real-time sex. (Greenfield and Rivet - Internet Use & Abuse Survey 1999)


The Internet provides a relatively safe place to meet people and it provides a way to be whomever you want to be without the fear of being outed for who you really are. You can make yourself out to be better looking, more successful, happier, athletic, important etc etc. You can take on personalities online that you wouldn't dare exhibit in real life, the Internet gives people a way to boost their self-esteem and to compensate for the short comings of their true reality. It is truly a make believe world in which the story can be written which ever way one chooses. The person on the other end of the computer sees and hears only what you want them to. It's not always easy to be dishonest about your appearance, especially if you want to eventually meet or include the use of a web cam in your online meetings; however, it is very easy to lie about who you are and what you do


When you “meet” someone online who sounds exciting, vibrant, sexy and interesting, you spend as much time as possible learning about them and fantasizing about them. You become locked into your own little secret world where you spend your time wondering how they look, how well they relate to you, how much you have in common, how they are always happy to hear from you and always say the perfect thing etc. As the “relationship” goes on, the two get to know each other better and the real world begins to enter the conversations. Little by little you share more of your personal information and life and little by little you dabble in the idea of bringing the relationship to reality. Trust develops because this is the person you can relate to and can share anything with. You are completely engaged in your online affair bubble and you begin obsessing about ways to bring this relationship out of cyberspace and into the real world.


Many people are shocked to find out that their loved one would be trolling for sex on the Internet or actually participating in an online affair. But the sad reality is that, like affairs at school, work, the gym or any other social setting, it usually begins quite innocently and grows into something much bigger and more difficult to get out of as time passes. People go online and in time get to know one another in this safe environment, they begin to trust one another, friendship grows, emotional bonds strengthen and before long the find themselves planning or having real time, real life relationships. Do not underestimate the power of the Internet for people meeting and beginning relationships, it happens daily in all areas and walks of life.


There are also those who are not looking to have a relationship outside of their marriage, or to build themselves up to others, rather they simply want sex with someone they don’t know. They desire the excitement of the chase, the power to entice and the possibility of commitment free sex They are attracted to the excitement the Internet can provide. They get off on the dirty stories they type about sex and fantasies and what they would do to the other person. They boost their sexual capabilities and give detailed accounts of the kind of lover they are and the pleasure they can bring.. They seek out others who share this desire and who are willing to "play the game". It is important not to fool ourselves, these are not just strippers, sex industry people or the dirty old man wearing a trench coat. This can be anyone, your coworker, your children's teachers, the next door neighbour, the bank manager and even your spouse. The Internet provides a place for anyone wanting to reach out for companionship, friendship, sex. affairs or whatever it is they seek and it's only a few keystrokes away. It can be social networking sites, chat rooms, web cam chat sites, free cybersex, paid cybersex- you name it, it's available.

Facts:

75% of all married males do not see online dating and online flirting as being a form of cheating. Women really feel much differently; cheating is cheating, regardless of when, exactly where or how.

Internet Porn Statistics - http://www.healthymind.com

-$57.0 billion revenue world-wide

-$12.0 billion of this is US revenue, more than all combined revenues of all professional football, baseball and basketball franchises or the combined revenues of ABC, CBS, and NBC (6.2 billion). $2.5 of the $12 billion is related to internet porn.

The National Coalition for the Protection of Children and Families states that "approximately 40 million people in the United States are sexually involved with the Internet.

"Sex is the number 1 topic searched on the Internet" (NCPCE Online, "Current Statistics", http://www.nationalcoalition.org)

25% of total search engine requests are porn-related. (Top three searches: sex, mp3 and hotmail.) 8% of total emails are porn-related. Average daily pornographic emails are 4.5 per internet user 12% of total websites are pornographic


It's important to be aware of your partners online activities. This doesn't mean you have to parent them or become obsessed with their online activities but if you suspect your partner is having an affair, chances are there is more to it. No one is immune to the lure of the internet as it provides a safe, discreet place for partners to seek out friendships that may or may not lead to real life affairs.

More by this Author


Comments 2 comments

wonderful1 profile image

wonderful1 5 years ago from Southern California

Yup! Totally true account of the lure online. I fell into the trap, mostly because I care about people, and the guy poured out his bleeding heart. It could all be true, but if anyone is in a relationship with someone else, just say "NO!" My last Hub is about a similar subject: don't fall for cyber-romance. It is a form of fantasy addiction. If your life is boring or missing something, and online "fantasy" romance can spice it up, and a lot of men think it's OK, since it's not physical. Great Hub, voted "useful."


cheatlierepeat profile image

cheatlierepeat 5 years ago from Canada Author

I can see how easy it could be to get wrapped up into the online thing. People can be anyone they want to be when hidden behind a screen. I'm looking forward to reading your hub, will be over there shorty :) Thank so much!

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working