Psycho Lamp Man
She was on State Street going to the local club she liked to frequent. It was a Thursday Night. She really didn’t want to go out but her ex was insistent upon it. He was not a good boyfriend but a great friend she could not figure out why that was. She liked going out with him and his friends since her friends never really liked to go out late or to the same clubs. This way she had someone to go with and she was able to have fun.
This night she was actually bored after she got there. The crowd was a bit different and no one really interested her. She tried to talk to a few people here and there but they all petered out. She was just about to ask her ex if they could leave when she spotted him talking to a girl in the corner. She could only imagine what he was saying and was pretty sure that it was the same exact thing that he had said to her about a year before. Were they in the exact same location of the club too? She couldn’t really remember but she thought so. Anyway she knew he would be there for a bit more so she decided to walk around the club one more time and look for an unexpecting victim. She was almost done doing the walk around when she spotted someone in a Minnesota Vikings Jersey. He was not her type at all but thought that it was interesting that he was actually dressed head to toe in Vikings gear, purple is such a strange color for clothing she thought to herself. So she walked up next to him and said, “Let me guess you are a Raiders fan too?” she smiled at him but he didn’t get it at all. So she added, “Just kidding I can see that you are a HUGE Vikings fan.” Then he figured it out. She thought to herself that he was a little slow but let that go. They started talking. He was shocked that she knew a lot about sports but she was used to that by now. Her father was a professional football player and she had a family member that was a professional baseball player not to mention she was a tomboy; sports were her forte. Guys were usually surprised by her overall knowledge and would proceed to test her until they realized that she knew exactly what she was talking about. This guy was no different but they were having a good conversation that is until she saw her ex motion to her that it was time to go. She gave him the one more minute finger although at that point she had another finger she wanted to flash him. So she wrapped up her discussion with her newest Viking fan and they decided to meet the next night at a bar down the street.
It was Friday night and she was back on State Street a few doors down from the club she was at the previous night. She was a little early to meet her new friend she of course could not remember his name she was terrible with that type of thing. She ordered a whiskey sour while she waited for him and talked to the bartender since it was still really early and there was no one in the bar yet. About ten minutes later he walked in dressed in you guessed it Vikings paraphernalia she was a little shocked and was starting to think that this guy might be a bit off but she gave him a chance. They had a couple of drinks and she was slowly realizing that they really had nothing in common and she was getting bored by the conversation. Luckily she had given him an excuse the night before just in case this type of thing happened. She was happy she had not given him her phone number or any pertinent information because she was beginning to get really skeptical. He offered to walk her to her car and she reluctantly said yes. On the way to the car she unexpectedly let out a huge burp. She was a little embarrassed but laughed after she said excuse me because she thought it was kind of funny. He was not impressed at all and let her know that. She was happy that she was getting in her car and going away. She looked out of her rearview window and saw him watching the car drive off. She was happy to be rid of him and only hoped that she would not run into him again. She went home and told her roommates about the horrendous date and they laughed. Then she called her ex to tell him about it and he laughed too.
Two days later she was heading to class. She noticed a car parked on the street but didn’t really pay any attention to it because it was a college town. When she returned home she saw that the same car was still there and proceeded to climb the stairs to her apartment. She was greeted by two of her roommates who had also noticed the car sitting out there when their male roommate came home and asked what was going on. When everyone went out to check on the car the car took off. So everyone went back inside and did not give the car another thought until the next day.
The following day she was woken by her male roommate who said she had to come out and see what was going on. On the porch was a huge box and attached to the box was a note. She took out the note and read it. It was from the Viking’s fan it was a love note and the box was a halogen torchiere floor lamp. She had never seen one before and her roommates were telling her that they were expensive. She however did not care she was completely freaked out. Had he followed her home how did he know where she lived? Was that him who had been sitting in his car? She had no idea what type of car he drove and was suddenly getting creeped out. She read the note and was even more freaked. In the note it talked about how she was the light in his life and that she shone brighter than the sun. Was this the same guy totally freaked out by her awesome burp three days before? She was trying to figure things out when the phone rang. She answered it and it was him. By now the roommates knew him as “psycho lamp man”. He was calling her but how? She asked him how he got the number and her address, his response was creepy “I have my ways”. She was starting to become disturbed. She told him thank you for the lamp but she did not want it. He refused to take it back. She asked him not to call anymore. He agreed.
The calls were numerous; there were messages on her phone from him. The calls got so bad that she refused to answer the phone, she would have her male roommate or her ex answer the phone. A week went by and he was not getting the hint, there were numerous gifts at her doorstep each and every day. The next big gift left on the door step was a diamond ring. WTF?! She was really scared now. She actually took the ring to have it appraised and was shocked at the value. What was this guy thinking? Boy could she pick them. At first her ex was laughing at the situation and then he realized how serious this was getting. No one knew exactly what to do. So she decided to take all of the gifts back to him, she asked her ex to come with her but he refused and told her that she shouldn’t go either he thought she should keep them because they were gifts but she really wanted no part of them. She told her ex that she was going to go drop off the stuff and although he didn’t agree with her doing that she let him know psycho lamp man’s address and what time she was going. She would call him again when she got home. Her ex wanted her to stop by his house on her way home just to be sure. She agreed.
She drove up psycho lamp man’s driveway to his house and gathered the stuff out of her car. There were so many gifts things were falling out of the huge box she had. Everything was still in its original package. She was only able to carry one box so she left the lamp behind for the second trip. She went up to the door and knocked. She was relieved when his roommates answered the door. She let them know that she was dropping off some items for him. They agreed and let her in. She didn’t notice that the roommates were leaving as she was carrying everything in. When she looked up psycho lamp man was standing right there in front of her. His hand on the door shutting it as he talked, his eyes were frightening as her heart jumped into her throat. She was trying to assess the situation and figure out the quickest way to get out. She was at a loss. He was getting angry and she could tell that he was not going to let her leave. He was attempting to lock the door when she kicked him and caught him off guard. She turned the knob and tried to open the door to get out but he was pulling her back. He was very strong, her back was to him and she kept her hand on the knob trying to pull it open. She saw another lock on the door and unlatched it freeing the door. She could feel him running after her but she was not about to turn around. A horn honked as she tried to reach her car but she ignored it running as fast as she could. He caught up to her as she tried to put her keys in the car door. Why did she lock it? Why did she come here? She was scared. She did not want to turn around she just wanted to get the door of the car open. She heard loud voices coming from the distance, she recognized them. She felt his grip loosen but still did not turn around she jumped into her car, shut and locked the door and turned to look. Her ex, his friend and psycho lamp men were in a heated battle. The battle was one-sided and she was sure she knew the outcome. Her ex was telling her to leave so she did. She drove directly to her ex’s house and waited. First the police came then her ex and his friend showed up. She felt relieved the nightmare was finally over.
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