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Real Women Have Curves: Voluptuous Is The New Black

Updated on August 16, 2009
Marilyn was sexy.
Marilyn was sexy.
Catherine Zeta Jones is sexy.
Catherine Zeta Jones is sexy.

Skinny is the crack-cocaine of the new millennium. Women are fast becoming addicted to deadly fashion trends and they’re growing dangerously thin. These Lollipop Ladies have made anorexia nervosa fashionable. They stroll the red carpet in the latest Versace gowns, bare ribs winking at you as their chest cavity sinks inward. You can’t help wincing in pain when you look at them.

It’s time real women returned to Hollywood, so we don’t wind up with a generation of half-dead women who don’t realize curves are part of being female.

Now, I’m not one of those health guru nutcases you see on late night infomercials. I’m not really here to promote healthy living, because I think most women would sacrifice their health in order to be beautiful. And if I’m honest, I’d be perfectly willing to go hungry in order to have a body I deem perfect. So I’m not going to make this appeal from the holier-than-thou “love yourself” perspective. I’m coming at you from the most realistic angle I can think of – sex appeal. And there is nothing sexy about an emaciated woman.

I don’t personally have the body structure to be that skinny, even if I wanted to. As I mention in my Big Booty Jeans article, I have some serious booty going on. And I love, love, love having it. I also enjoy having breasts. Therefore, I’m unwilling to binge, purge or otherwise starve my body in hopes of looking like someone who belongs in hospice somewhere.

Salma Hayek is sexy.
Salma Hayek is sexy.
Raquel Welch is sexy.
Raquel Welch is sexy.

So what's my point?

I want us to return to the age of beauty. Sure, the concept has evolved over time. I don’t want to go back to the middle ages, don’t worry. I don’t actually want to go too far back at all. I want to go back to my mother’s generation. Most of my friends worry that men don’t find that look sexy.

Yes, they do.

Of course, I realize that if you ask the average man today what sexy is, he’ll probably rattle off a Lollipop Hollywood starlet. I can understand why you might have the impression a girl with real curves wouldn’t appeal to him. Not to worry. The only reason he’s not naming voluptuous women is because he doesn’t have a modern-day reference for one.

If you asked him about Sophia Loren, Brigitte Bardot, Raquel Welch – he’d be drooling by the time you finished the question. This doesn't mean that you should stuff your face with twinkies and sit on your couch all day. Obesity is not sexy, either.

So what do you do?

You tone it, baby.

The difference between a chubby girl and a sexy girl is just a waist.

Keira Knightley needs some home cooking!
Keira Knightley needs some home cooking!

Seriously. Marilyn Monroe would have looked quite pudgy without hers. So would Sophia Loren and others. It's that hourglass figure that men lust for, whether they know it or not. It's genetic. So, if you don't have one naturally, do some exercises to tone that tummy up.

But remember, curves are sexy - skeletons are not.

Just take a look at the women around you. Who would sleep with, if you were a man? Or if you're a lesbian, or bi, or whatever. I mean, would you want to sleep with a girl who looks like she's ill? Or would you rather sleep with someone who has a little padding in the right places?

If it doesn’t wobble too much when you walk, he will find it sexy – because it is.

xx Isabella

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