Reasons Why Guys Who Take Their Dates to Traveling Carnivals Are Screwing Up

This is the "hook" to get guys to come inside

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One question

can you tell me why traveling carnivals make so much money? Is it the "Amazing Monko, The Fire-eating Monkey?" The super-thrilling rides? Well what then?

Guys. That's the answer in a nutshell, no arguments. Guys who are gullible and easily-led from a sensible pathway down a "Fools Road," that carries this simp to the magically-alluring night-life only found in the traveling carnival.

Guy, you are all smiles now, but wait until you get inside the carnival

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You look like a "He Man," to your girl, but another guy will soon beat you

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Do not make a mistake

in believing that a circus and a traveling carnival are the same industry, for they are not. The carnival, the one by Barnum-Bailey, does have a bit more credibility than those traveling "Money-Suctions" that go from town to town taking suckers, mostly young guys with pretty girls, for all of the money and self-respect they have.

The last traveling carnival that came to my hometown had an alcoholic for a clown named, "Bosco," who hurled insensitive racial remarks right and left all night long, until an African-American girl who had been pushed too far, let him have it with her fists and mouth at the same time. Our local police arrested this jerk for public drunkness and aggravated assault. This is the type of carnival I am talking about.

Girl leads humiliated boyfriend out of the carney

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This guy spent $35.00 on a $3.00 Teddy bear

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"The lure of bright lights and deception"

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Eating is a bad mistake at carnivals for you will lose it on the rides

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Forgive me, I went off-point

for a moment, but it was worth it to alert you guys who are still dating that pretty girl you met at the Piggly Wiggly two months ago while she was with her mom shopping for groceries to feed to her family for Sunday dinner.

Yes, guys. You are the ones this piece is aimed at for no other reason that for you to keep your self-respect, hard-earned money, and the loving-respect of your pretty girlfiend. Because the majority of traveling carnivals are designed to strip you of all three things.

I have stood on the outside of the carnivals who came to my hometown many years ago and see the local guys who had worked hard all day then went home, shaved, showered, dressed in their finest and then picked up their steady girlfriends to go to the carnival. What a night.

And even I at a young age could see plainly that these guys were growing angry at losing at simple games such as "Milk Bottle Throw," and lose most of their money as their supportive girlfriends tried to put on a civil face as their boyfriends were made a fool of by slick carnival gamers. Then these same guys, when they had lost enough, began to swear at the slick hucksters and almost came to blows with them. Who could blame them?

Our rural town is just the type of small town that traveling carnival owners prey upon because we rural people have an ugly stigma of being stupid rubes who will fall for anything. So please be aware of what I am telling you. Summer is here and this is the time for traveling carnivals to blow into your town, take your money and leave.

Look how gullible this young man is at the carival

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Guys, showing off at carnivals is not wise

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What did I say about loading-up on food at carnivals?

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So now, guys here are the reasons

why "you," are the basic reason that traveling carnivals are raking-in the dough.

Before I begin, let me prove my point by giving you some hard facts about "you":

  • You guys are driven by ego, pride, and testosterone and these three ingredients always cloud your judgment and make you lose your common sense when your pretty girlfriend is with you.
  • You want to impress your girlfriend at any cost. Right, guys?
  • You want your girlfriend to go with a winner, but a good old boy loser.
  • You want to prove your manhood in these allegedly-easy carnival games

1. Do you not know that although your girlfriend loves you, that you are always going to "go to war" with anyone who laughs at you or makes fun of you. And most carnival gamers do just that to shake you up into getting unsettled so you will make mistakes at their rigged-games.

2. Carnival-gamers are masters of manipulation of the male ego. When your and your girlfriend stroll by one of their games (that are fixed so you will lose), and you hear, "Hey, there, big boy! Come on over and win a pretty Teddy bear for the pretty lady!" First you smile and try to keep walking. Then you hear, "If I were her man, I would be here winning this bear for her and isn't she the prettiest rose in the garden." You have had it. Your temper is now mixing with your ego and you would rather lay down in front of an oncoming freight train than lose the respect of your girlfriend. Soon you are down a few bucks. Your caring girlfriend tells you it's time to leave and she really doesn't care for the bear. The crooked-gamer hears this and says, "Are you the man in this relationship or the mouse, boy?" Then you lose the rest of your money.

3. I have used the word "most," in describing crooked traveling carnivals, not "all." There are a few good carnivals out there, but do not go seeking them. Now when you enter the carnival, do not run directly to the food and chow-down. Sure you are hungry from not eating lunch at your job today at the "Oil and Lube Galaxy," but if you load up on corndogs and fried peppermint sticks, you will lose it on the rides they have in the carnival. Do you really want to vomit in front of your girlfriend? She will surely think you are a weakling.

4. Before a traveling carnival rolls into your town, did you know that your industries and job picture are all studied by the carnival owners? The carnival being in your town is not a random event, but a strategic business move. They are there for one reason: To make money. Your dough. And please do not act all manly in front of your girlfriend because it will never work. Remember, "It takes more courage to walk away from trouble than get mixed up in it."

5. Yes, you love your girlfriend with all of your heart and I do not blame you for taking her to the carnival because it is a new thing in town. I am not dissing your town, but if your town is like mine, there is not a whole lot to do, so the carnival is the best idea for you to take your girlfriend for one thing you do not need is a bored girlfriend. The carnival is one jumping place alright. Rides, food, drinking that is not seen, and illegal drugs are used by the ride operators. I read about this one carnival that was put out of business by a family whose son was injured on a ride operated by a drunk operator, so please watch yourself at the carnivals.


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Married couples are perfect

for going to the traveling carnival. Why? Do you see the smile on the husband's face? He is smiling because he does not have anything to prove to his supportive wife of 20 years. Yes, when they dated, he learned a hard-lesson by overdoing his bravado one night at one of these "Money Pits With Wheels," and lost a lot of money.

Then his then-girlfriend who is now his wife sat him down when they got home, dried his tears, and rebuilt his manhood by telling him that she never wanted to go to the carnival to begin with. He learned in that two-hour talk that listening to her is a wise thing and when a carnival rolls into town to excise the citizens' money, a wise thing is to go to a movie and have a better time.

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Comments 6 comments

sheilamyers 2 years ago

You are so correct about the carnivals are there to make money and the games are rigged. Well, maybe not rigged as in no one can ever win, but they're designed to be nearly impossible to win - the milk bottles are too heavy to knock over with the ball, the basketball is only slightly smaller than the hoop, the balloons aren't inflated enough to be damaged by a glancing dart, and I could go on. Here's the other thing. You spend $10-20 to win that little bear. Not worth it really. They buy those in bulk and probably only paid a $1 for it. And you can probably buy the same "prize" in the little gift shop (if they have one) for $5.


Amanda108 profile image

Amanda108 2 years ago from Michigan, United States

Carnivals definitely aren't a sensible date for whoever is paying, that's for sure. But as a woman, I kind of love being taken to one, especially at night. I like the grease in the air and the obnoxious lights and the attempts to win stupid stuffed animals, perhaps because it's just such a classic American summertime activity.

Very amusing hub!


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

Everything you write is very true Kenneth. I went to my first travelling fair in about 20 years in May this year with my wife. I am older and wiser now. We only looked at free displays, bought a little food but didn't go on any rides ( you know the price of those now?) and I didn't get sucked in by any sideshow games like I used to. We even got free show bags with our entry for the grand kids. This was a fun hub, but I am a little concerned that under your picture titled "eating is a bad mistake at carnivals for you will lose it on the rides" you have a couple holding plastic bags containing gold fish. I hope that isn't the new 'fair fare'...lol. I have written a couple of hubs about fairs also "A Day at the Show" and "Freak Show" you may like to check out. Voted up.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Jodah,

My friend, I am proud of you. I really am! Great going!

I am serious.

But the sad part, I cannot say that this hub helped to wise you up. LOL.

Thanks for your comments.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Amanda108,

Thanks for your opinion on this topic. I guess for girls that the atmosphere is romantic and exciting. Thanks for the info. I appreciate your slant.

Come back to visit again.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear sheilamyers,

I wish I had emailed you before I wrote this. The information about the games you have in your comment was more in-detail.

But you are right. Rigged or maybe "creatively-designed," not to be beaten.

At any rate, people will LOSE money.

Thanks, dear friend for your help.

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