Shadow in the Sun

Stripped ~

I put down my pride for you. I put it down, and I walked away. How much less of me can there be than what I have become? Scary when I think of what the answer to that question may be. Scary because I am at the very center of this whole process. I let you do this to me . . .

I am shadow though I stand in the blinding sun. How can I be this hollow? I am a tiny fragment of my former self, and all that is visible is the thin outer layer. I am buried in the folds of a flower blossoming with a thousand petals. I call that flower love. I love you, I love you, I love you so much that I have buried myself inside of you.

Why is there no logic, nor indisputable argument, which can tear me away from you? Without you, nothing makes sense. I disappear into the shadow that is me. I am love living in darkness, and playing over and again in my mind is ~isn’t that where love is needed most? I comfort myself with that particular thought as if I will find all manner of justification for this torture which I have allowed to become my life. Love cannot be explained, and I don’t believe that it cares to be explained. The heart purely understands and accepts love. My head lives on a different plane. The two shall never meet. They speak different languages, neither of which translates into the other.

There is nothing more beautiful than to be folded inside of a flower called love. I am immersed in the glory that is you, and I see you in a way that no other can possibly fathom. Still, I cannot deny that loving you in darkness leaves me hollow. A love that is hidden never sees the sun. I exist on the line where the sun meets shadow ~ I am neither here, nor there. And it is no matter . . . because I cannot give you up.

© 2012 Bella Nina

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Comments 15 comments

writer20 profile image

writer20 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

This is a sad poem with a beautiful rose keeping you company.

Voted up and beautiful, Joyce.


Bella Nina profile image

Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA Author

Thank you so much Joyce. I appreciate you reading my work.


always exploring profile image

always exploring 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

So very beautiful! Love's torment, perfectly described..


SparrowMinistries 4 years ago

Penetrating. Devastating. Heartbreaking. Real. Up and awesome!


Bella Nina profile image

Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA Author

Thank you both for your support of this hub. It is real, tormenting, heartbreaking, and beautiful. That is love. All of it. I appreciate so very much that you have read and recognized all of this.


Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Voted up and beautiful. Love can hurt much we just have to try and go on. Sad but very expressive poem.


Bella Nina profile image

Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA Author

Thank you so much Miss Gypsy Rose Lee. I always appreciate your comments!! Love does hurt, but, it is almost impossible to give up on love.


Sueswan 4 years ago

Hi Bella,

"Still, I cannot deny that loving you in darkness leaves me hollow. A love that is hidden never sees the sun"

Beautiful and heartwrenching. You deserve sunshine.

Voted up and away


Bella Nina profile image

Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA Author

Thank you Sueswan. I am still searching for my sunshine. Thank you for your kind words. They are truly appreciated.


Rolly A Chabot profile image

Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

Hi Bella Nina... words are hard to express some feelings and yet you have captured them well... thank you for sharing...

Special Hugs from Canada


Bella Nina profile image

Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA Author

Thank you for caring Rolly! I appreciate your comment. Thx for the hugs too!


Theater girl profile image

Theater girl 3 years ago from New Jersey

"Loving you in darkness leaves me hollow"

This line is so moving and resonating!


Bella Nina profile image

Bella Nina 3 years ago from USA Author

I am glad this piece spoke to you Theater girl. Thank you for reading.


Rolly A Chabot profile image

Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

Hi Bella... "I disappear into the shadow that is me. I am love living in darkness, and playing over and again in my mind is ~isn’t that where love is needed most"

Powerful words to ponder this day, voted up for certain...

Hugs


Bella Nina profile image

Bella Nina 2 years ago from USA Author

Thank you for reading my work. And thank you for the vote!

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