Single Moms and Dating

As a single mother, dating is often very difficult. Trying to find a babysitter who will be able to stay out late, dealing with your own guilt at leaving your children, and wondering when it is right to introduce someone new to your children. All of these are concerns facing single moms. I found that trying to develop a social life in the midst of raising a family is one of the hardest things mothers face. The following advice is tried and true ways to start the dating process.

First and foremost, you need to realize that you deserve to have some time for yourself. You need a break from your daily stress and struggles. Make sure you always explain to your date that you have children. I know so many women who are afraid to tell anyone that they have kids, for fear of rejection. That is precisely why you need to tell your date. If he is the kind of person who would not want to date a woman with children, then you need to know that up front, because he is definitely not the right kind of person for you! In my many years of being single and dating, I never found the fact that I had three kids to be a problem. My happiness, confidence and pride in my children always seemed to show through. Like they say, attitude is everything.

Make sure you are always aware of the "red flags" that a person gives off. Women often tend to overlook the signs of a bad partner, which later, after the relationship has ended they often say that they felt it wasn't right, but just ignored it. Realize that you and your kids deserve nothing but the best! Do not settle, you are worth a lot more than you think. Even if you don't have the confidence yet to believe in your own self worth, you know that your children deserve nothing but the best. Trust your instincts and when someone makes you feel uncomfortable, uneasy, or just plain bad about yourself, move on. There are many wonderful guys out there ready and willing to be a part of your life.

Do not let your kids make you feel guilty. They will always try to, but just remind them that they would not like it if you never let them spend time with their friends? This tends to make them see you as a person and not just a "mom". Once they realize that you need time for yourself too, it no longer becomes an issue. If your children are young, I would schedule dates a little later so that I would put the children to bed and they never even realized that I had been gone. My babysitter was a neighbor and her parents would often let her sleep over. Try and find a neighbor or family member that can watch the kids, the guilt you feel for going out becomes a lot easier when you realize that the children are sleeping the whole time you are away. Remember that the guilt you feel is normal, we all feel it, but you deserve to treat yourself to some fun also.

Introducing your children to someone new should happen only after you have made sure that this person is a quality, stable, supportive, confident and caring person. Make sure you talk to your children about this person and that they feel okay with meeting them. If they are not ready to, don't force the issue. They will eventually come around, especially when they notice how happy this person makes you. Your children want you to be happy, they just need time to warm up to the fact that another person other than their father is making you happy.

Go out and be the wonderful, confident, and happy person that you used to be. The person that you thought was long gone, the person that you are beginning to discover and once again like. You deserve the best and you need to learn how to believe in yourself again. Your happiness is in direct correlation with your children's happiness. Go out and find your passion for life, love and adventure! Your children will thank you!

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Hazok profile image

Hazok 8 years ago from Malaysia

i will pass this to a friend of mine, a single mom of three kids. thanks


Thirst Of Holy Spirit Ministries Pakistan 7 years ago

Dear Brother in Christ! Blessing and greeting:We are living in Islamic Republic of Pakistan. Our Ministry working here in Pakistan, Its is Muslim country here the word of Jesus are very important “Brothers and Sisters I have a request to you as you know we are working in many outreach areas we go in door to door for Prayers, Preaching and Bible distribution section on Thirst Of Holy Spirit Ministries in Pakistan. Last year we have distributed more then 500 Urdu Bibles free of cost to new believers. Now we again want to start Bible distribution mission. We need more then 2000Urdu Bibles for our outreach areas. People are waiting for their own Bibles. Urdu is national language of Pakistan and people can easily read Urdu Bible. Brother you have to share this letter with your brothers and sisters in Christ and friends and relative and church members to help us in this mission. Your small help will be very big contribution. We will send you complete Bible distribution report with pictures. We will be very thankful to you for this kindness. Kindly reply me soon. ” Thirst Of Holy Spirit Ministries in Pakistan is a non-denominational & non-profit Christian ministry supported by our loving staff, and by the contributions of the community. We are working since 2004. Our vision and calling is to reach the un-reached, un-churched and remote areas of Pakistan. Our purpose is to fulfill the Great Commission that Jesus gave to us “Go ye into the entire world and preach the gospel to every creature.” (Mark 16:15). We are dedicated to spreading the Good News of the redemption of mankind by the blood of Jesus Christ in hopes that Pakistani people will accept Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord and receive eternal life.We are doing cottage prayer meetings and open air prayer meetings to the un-reached areas. The areas we are focusing on preaching in Muslim & Hindus, church planting, Sunday school, leadership development Education of children & capacity building. Through Sunday school we develop every part of a child-spirit, soul, and body – through worship, teaching, prayer, fellowship and evangelism and we are committed to see that each child knows Christ as their personal Lord and Savior and is trained for a lifetime of service. We are helping of Widows through food. We invite you to come on a Mission Trip to Pakistan to preach to the un-reached sections of Pakistan. We would be delighted for you to visit in Pakistan to encourage us and our needy people. We ask you to stand with us in prayer and support. We would like to invite those of you the Lord has called to come and be a part of the great Harvest in Pakistan. Pray for the needs of our ministry that we are engaged in spreading Gospel to Muslims, & Hindus in Pakistan. We need ministry donors for the ministry work in Pakistan, we have 7 Pastors & 5-Elders who are working with us in different areas of Pakistan. We want to plant churches in different areas of Pakistan. We request you to share about our ministries with your Church family or ministries leadership team and respond to us as the Lord leads you. If you have any questions or would like more information, please do not hesitate to contact us. We will be glad to share more information with you. We hope you will help us in Toba Tek Singh Pakistan. God richly bless you as you follow and serve Him whole heartedly in Jesus Christ. We also want affiliation & work with you in Toba Tek Singh Pakistan. May God truly bless and use you more in this wonderful harvest for Christ under the Holy Spirit. Hallelujah, Amen. With humble prayers and regards, Yours in Jesus Christ, Please donate us. Contact us. Ev. Qaisar Anwar Christian Colony Toba Tek Singh 36050 Pakistan, Website; http://www.freewebs.com/thirstofholyspiritministri... Thanks


HENRY NYABUTO 6 years ago

happy to join this group.

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