Six Practical Healthy Ways To Overcome Anger and Avoid Depression
So, you are angry! At what? With whom? Since when? You have a deep-seated problem that triggers your anger. You are stressed out. You are depressed. You are hurting so badly. You can't let go. You are dangerously heading to an emotional crisis. Don't you know that negative and overwhelming emotion can make you sick? It can lead you to either a neurotic or a psychotic condition. You may not realize it, but people close to you will.
Don't be a dud! When anger knocks you out, try to recover your balance like a real fighter. Pull yourself up, don't let anger pull you down. Identify the cause of that anger. It may not be worth a cent to feel that way. No matter how careful we are, problems that trigger anger will find us. Nix the problem, overcome your anger, beat depression that is likely to be its ugly end. Do your best to unplug yourself from anger before it burns you out. Think positive. Act positive and - act now!
To Set The Subject In The Right Perspective, What is Anger? (New World Dictionary, Second College Edition).
ANGER is broadly applicable to feelings of resentful or revengeful displeasure. It has several connotations depending on its seriousness, such as : 1. indignation - implies righteous anger aroused by what seems unjust, mean or insulting; 2. rage - suggests a violent outburst of anger in which self-control is lost; 3. fury - implies a frenzied rage that borders on madness; 4. ire - is chiefly a literary word that suggests a great show of anger in acts, words, looks, etc.; 5. wrath - implies deep indignation expressing itself in a desire to punish or get revenge.
There you are! By these definitions, you may categorize your anger that is recently eating you up. And whatever it is, anger is still regarded as unpleasant, negative, unhealthy.
What is Depression?
Depression connotes low spirits, gloominess, dejection, sadness. It's an emotional condition either neurotic or psychotic, characterized by feelings of helplessness, inadequacy, etc.
There again! Depression is an emotional condition caused by prolonged anger. A person may feel unbearable self-pity and refuses to go out and socialize because he is busy nursing his pains and hurts. Or if he does, his presence around is the last thing others would want because he spreads around his abomination.
Anger and depression are enemies of our body due to repercussions like anxieties, sleeplessness, lack of appetite, moodiness, and the like. We can't avoid being angry, but I have suggestions to overcome anger. Less anger we have in our hearts, less depression to live on.
Some Healthy Suggestions to Nix Anger and Depression
1. Shake off and shape up.
Anger invites depression. Both drain you emotionally and physically to a point where you want to unload your burden. Chances are, a very angry person seems blind at the height of anger. He may vent his anger on the wrong guy. Many relationships had been broken this way. Some supposedly long-enduring kind of friendship, a successful marriage, good family relationship, are just few of relationships that went sour due to unjust and unreasonable verbal and physical abuse by an enraged friend, husband or wife, parent, brother or sister.
If you happen to be this person, do your best to recover from your anger. You may be barking up the wrong tree. It's important to listen to what the other would say. Apologize right away if somebody other than the one you hurt explains to you that you are wrong. Shake off and shape up. If you are the victim of such an outburst, don't let the domino effect get you by reacting with equally provoking outburst. Don't fan the already raging fire. Keep this in mind, it's not you who have a problem, so it's easier for you to think positive. Soothe his feelings with soft, careful, and mellow advice. But, act only if you feel it right at the moment. Otherwise, just take a flight, after leaving some words of advice.
2. Keep the sinking ship afloat as much as possible.
When the winds of anger threatens a good relationship like a ship about to sink in turbulent seas, keep the vessel afloat. Collect your strength and push away anything that will rock the boat . Don't get intimidated if you are the object of that anger. Don't be onion-skinned, because until proven, you are innocent to whatever you are suspected about that caused the other to get angry with you. Keep the situation under control with the highest degree of tolerance. This is the birthmark of a God-fearing individual- loving, understanding, and exercises calm under pressure.
Kind words are tonic to a raging wrath. Your first duty is to salvage the relationship. If by all means, the ship continues to tilt to a dangerous dive, abandon ship. You did what you have to do and did your best. Don't dwell on guilt afterward. You always have a choice. Stay away from the worrier. He must learn his lesson on his own.
3. Stay away from a person blinded by anger.
A compulsive troublemaker at the height of anger won't listen to any reason. See if he has anything in his hands. Take note of his actions. It's just right to keep your distance for safety. We can never tell what an extremely angry person will do if you make mistake in your words or actions toward him. Many good intentions to pacify a howling beast ended in accidents or even in death. Let him listen to his own noise by keeping your calm. Wait for him to slacken, because anger has also a life span. If he insists, let go and leave.
4. Find a goal of self-improvement.
Anger doesn't happen overnight. It also has a shell where it stays, waiting to be dealt with. Before any untoward incident happens, I mean before this hidden anger shows its ugly fangs, the person must identify what causes his anger. Normally, we are angry when we don't get things right to our own liking, good or bad. We are angry because we are not contented with our job. We are angry when we are unemployed and are helplessly depending on dole-outs. We boil inside by mere mention of things we want to have but couldn't get. We don't believe that it may not be good for us. We even fake anger to cover up our bad deeds. We believe that we are always right so that any word of reprimand makes us blow our top. Wrong! Guilty conscience also causes anger. We need to give ourselves a chance to find out why we failed and what consequences we risk of our bad behavior. It may be a hard decision to make , but we must. Learning never ends, it's a life-long process. Let's develop the ability to process the triggers of our anger and find ways to solve them for self-improvement. In every argument, there are two sides to consider. Every problem has its solution.
It's best to seek advice from people we trust. If we can't work out solution to our own problem, somebody knows how. We only need to understand that no man is an island. Self-improvement doesn't mean you have to do it all alone. We can learn from others as well. Be open to what others may say, at the same time that we apply good judgment to what we learn from them. Don't be a lazy rut, waiting for others to bail you out every time you fail. Move. Persevere. Nobody will do it for you.
5. Engage yourself in worthwhile hobby/hobbies.
This interesting topic your teacher taught you as a schoolchild is still the best healthy suggestion to keep you active, busy, and productive. Instead of wallowing in indolence, in your perceived nothingness, inadequacies- that only make you angry- review your childhood hobbies. You may actually have missed them due to exigencies of daily work, of life as a whole. Don't let negative emotions overpower you doing nothing of worth. Create and be proud of your God-given talents.
Gardening, for example, could be an exhilarating hobby. Imagine life sprouting under your thumb- seedlings of all sorts proudly peeping into the world and trusting you to nurture them in their helplessness. What a feeling to smell your own flowers, taste your own vegetables and savor your own succulent fruits. Your reward will be innumerable. Just try it!
6. Serve God, by serving others.
Christians active in church service, such as the lay ministers, believe that our deep faith in God teaches us to live life free from negatives- like sins. Anger, extreme anger- makes us sinners, because we cause the tribulation of others by being angry. We likewise make God sad by being angry with our brothers. For did He not say, "Love your neighbors as you love Me"? Our neighbor starts from our closest relation, our family. We don't have the right to love another if we don't love our own brother. Did Jesus not tell His disciples, "Whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers, that you do unto me"? You vent your anger on an innocent brother, that you vented on God, The Father Almighty.
Keep God's commandments. Gain spiritual wisdom from Godly teachings in order to broaden your relationship with others and with God. Serve others and you have served God. Love others and you have loved God. Put God in the center of your life and you will think the nth times before you vent your anger unto another. If you are unhappy, join the church choir. Singing is the best form of prayer. Let's sing for our deliverance from anger and depression. Sing praises to the Lord, Our God. Amen, Alleluia!
More by this Author
All alone and in pain . . . I writhed in excruciating pain from my right waist radiating down my right thigh and two feet one early morning. It was 5:30 in the morning of June 9, 2009, a Tuesday. I just...