Approach Anxiety Secret: Overcome Your Fear Of Approaching Women in 5 Minutes!

Approach Anxiety Secret: How To Approach Women

Approach anxiety is pretty easy to explain. All of us guys get it
at one point or another.

Remember seeing a super hella hot girl that you were just dying
to say hi to except you never did because some tiny voice in
your head was pretty good at talking you out of it?

I sure do. It seems there is a weird alter personality we've got
in our brains that takes control the moment we're about to do
something we really WANT to do.

No matter how much you want to walk over and say hi to the girl,
you feel absolutely 100% PARALYZED and can't actually do it.

It's as if some hidden force has taken over your body and mind.

And its holding you back!

You try to fight the force in your head, however you can't seem to
free yourself from this invisible force. This invisible force is called
approach anxiety.

Every single one of us has experienced this nonsense.

At first, when I started going out, I'd find myself at a bar, seeing
everybody else have fun, I just couldn't figure out how to be as cool
and social as these people were.

I had no clue what to say if I strolled over and actually chatted
to a group of girls.

I'd be like a wallflower, watching dudes going up to girls & just start
chatting with them, it seemed they were in a secret society of men
that developed this unbelievable approaching skill. I certainly
wasn't in that society. I couldn't approach women.

Deep down inside, I knew that was totally wrong. These guys had the
exact same physical biology as I did, I mean, our brains are almost
exactly the same.

I finally came to the conclusion that the only difference between me and
the guys is this supposed secret society was that they were THINKING
DIFFERENT THOUGHTS than I was when they approached a girl.

There is nothing more to approaching women!

They had a different mindset than I did, this mindset made it possible
for them to break through that invisible force known as approach anxiety
and go talk to the girl they liked.

One other key I figured out was knowing what you're gonna say to her
BEFORE I walked up.

For a few months, I just sat back and watched how these guys worked.

The funny thing is that the lines these dudes were using weren't
even close to being secret or special. They said things like:

"Hi there, how are you tonight?"

I couldn't believe this crap worked with girls, but it really did.
But it wasn't because of the words....More on this in a second.

"So what are you doing this evening?"

I mean, this isn't any different than the 1st one. I thought chuckled
to myself at how un-original their lines were. This was the best these
players could do?

Then a flashbulb went off in my head...................

I was looking for a more complicated solution than I needed. Overcoming
approach anxiety wasn't complicated at all.

These dudes weren't even all that much to look at, and still they were
successful, and here I was looking for some other secret to show me how
to fix my problem.

But the solution was staring me in the face the ENTIRE TIME!!!!

After these dudes walked up to a girl, they just started talking about
small things, after a few minutes everyone would be laughing & having
a fun time.

This was exactly the solution I was searching for, it just took me a super
long time to figure it out...

I just had to go over to these girls and bring them a good time!

I know, it sounds like an over-simplification, but thats really all
these chicks want when they go out......


The secret was that it wasn't at all the fun that allowed these dudes to
get over their fear of approaching girls.............

It was the BELIEF that they were going to be fun when they got there.

Holy Moses.

I know what you're thinking....This sounds so simple, but it certainly
ain't easy.

This is why I'm laying out an easy five part technique to get over ur
own fear of approaching women. this is a hella simple process that
any guy can use to start a conversation with a hot girl. It will
work in any situation.

Shall we begin?

Secret Approach Anxiety Part ONE) Always Follow the 3 Second Rule......

As soon as you notice a girl you'd like to meet, u have no more than 3
tiny seconds until that voice in ur mind tries to talk you out of it.

So if you take to long to approach, the invisible man in your head seizes
control and you find yourself totally paralyzed.

You don't want this invisible bastard of a man to take over......

The moment you spot a hot chick, just walk over and talk to her as well
as her friends. You're probably saying to yourself, "I need some time to
think of something to say". Wrong, so wrong. Whats happening is
that your mind gets caught up in the anxiety of the moment, & the fear
takes over and stops you.

So just approach her. As long as you have a bit of confidence & a good
opening line, everything will be money. Here's how to get them both.

SECRET APPROACH Anxiety PART TWO) Control Your Body Language!

Once you take a step in the direction of the girl, push your chest
out & shoulders back. Raise your chin so that you are almost
looking down your nose a bit. It will probably seem awkward at 1st,
but this is just because you aren't used to doing it.

Once you adjust your posture, ur confidence totally moves up a few points.

Psychologists have proved this because emotional states in our mind are
directly linked to physical states in our body. Don't believe me, try to
smile and think bad thoughts at the same time....Its really hard isn't it?

Let's move the eff on......

Secret APPROACH Anxiety PART THREE) Setting the Limit...

I want you to feel totally safe when you go up to a girl. The thought
of rejection or that you could look like a fool in front of them is
what actually causes most of your fear.

If you set a limit on how long you're gonna talk to
the girls, you'll be able to lessen ur anxiety level and relax.
This projects a much better "vibe".

To do this, just make sure the 1st thing you say to them is:

"I was just about to leave, but..."


"I was on my way to meet a friend, but..."

All these lines do is give a girl a context for you approaching them.
Girls are always gonna wanna know the answer to the
question "Why is this guy talking to me?"

These lines also tells them that you have someplace else to go,
which causes u to be less likely to freak out when you start the talk.

Doing this stuff will give you some confidence.

Now all you need is........

SECRET APPROACH Anxiety PART FOUR) How To Open The Conversation.......

This opening line is absolutely priceless, I guarantee it works almost
100% of the time. Its pain free, super easy to remember and erases the
need to come up with something clever to say.

Drumroll please.......

The magic opening phrase when you approach a woman is:

"I just had to let u know that u have a really about
you. My name is Bobby"

When you introduce yourself, she'll give you her name, and then all
you have to do is ask a quick, funny question about wherever it is
that you find yourself in.

For example, in a Macy's department store , you would say: "Hmmm, I see
you came here to shop that magnetic strip off your mastercard?"

If you're at the bar, just say, "I bet you came here to recruit
people for your church, right?"

There's no need to be hella clever with these lines. Its totally not

Just get a little laugh so that you break her
tension and show her that you're a cool guy.

Because you want to reach to the final step fast.......

SECRET APPROACH Anxiety PART FIVE) Close her & make an easy exit.....

The goal of approaching is getting the girl invested in the
interaction so that she has a bit to lose if she doesn't talk to
you again.

This totally stops the "flaking" that chicks do!

This is a no fail technique, but it can take some practice to get
it down pat.

I think the best path is to find something you have in common
that the girl is interested in, and then promise a sort of payoff
related to it.

Here's how it could go. Imagine this all takes place at a Best Buy, and
she tells you she'd getting the new "Killers" album. Just tell her
something like:

"OMG, I totally have an awesome video of them at Lollapalooza. I had it
on my phone, but erased it. Give me ur number & if we meet up again
I'll show it to you. You would absolutely love it!"

If you have her put her number in ur phone, and call her right there so
she can add your name in her phone, this will avoid her seeing a number
she doesn't really know later on and she'll be more likely to answer.

Bam Bam Bam......Done and Done.

World's Best Dating Advice

Comments 5 comments

Jack Reed - How To Approach Women 7 years ago

Because we think of a lot of negative things, that would hinder men from approaching women. It is best to always keep a positive thinking and keep in mind that approaching women is normal and most women wants to be approached.

Approach Anxiety 6 years ago

Good article on approach anxiety. I use some of these techniques in my system as well. Check out my site.

chengxuebo 6 years ago


dave 3 years ago

Let the women approach so you at least know that they are interested.

jaysamuelli profile image

jaysamuelli 3 years ago from NYC

great hub, i have had approach anxiety before

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