"The" 10, Absolutely Worst, Things You Can Do or Say
GUYS, "PLEASE" READ THIS CAREFULLY
Pictures of "absolutely" the worst things men and women can do or say. (Explanations in story).
So you decide to eat
at this fancy dining establishment. The type of restaurant that requires men to wear a tie and suit. Not your average "dive," with the smoky atmosphere, fights breaking out every five minutes and a gallon glass jug on the bar with pickled eggs to eat. This place you are dining at tonight is uptown with a lot of class.
Uh, oh. Your steak doesn't good. Your taste buds are finely-tuned instruments that tell you when food isn't good. You tell your waiter, "Lance," to tell the chef about this problem. "Lance" complies. Several times. But the chef is very temperamental. He doesn't remedy the problem. You tell "Lance," "your chef is a bum!"
Friend. just eat the steak without uttering a word to "Lance" or anyone. Insulting a chef anywhere is definitely one of the "10 Worst Things You Can Do or Say."
ARE YOU A PERSON who loves dogs? The world needs more animal-lovers. Say, you have a new next-door neighbor moving in who has a cute puppy. You go to welcome the them, but friend, you were busy cutting-up the steaks for your cook-out and never changed clothes. When you set foot on this new neighbor's property, your love for dogs will disappear. Having the scent of raw meat on your clothes is "One of The Worst Things You Can Do or Say."
GIRLS, WHEN YOU GO TO A BIG OFFICE MEETING do you ever take that extra minute to inspect your teeth? Oh, I know that you check your make-up which is always perfect, but if you have lunch before this meeting, chances are that when you and the girls are in the ladies room "freshening up" for the meeting, you might be distracted talking about the new single guy in the office and neglect your front teeth. When people laugh at you in the meeting for having a piece of cabbage lodged in your teeth, you will think of this story.
GUYS, ALWAYS BE AWARE of your surroundings in every restaurant you frequent. Why? I will tell you. There you are at your table nibbling on that prime rib when you spy a very hot chick at the next table who winks at you. You smile and wink back. Hey, this might lead to something, but this pesky kid with a pinwheel keeps running around and around your table laughing and giggling until you tell the hot chick, "this brat has to go," and the hot chick's face turns hades-red and says, "that brat IS MY KID." Oops. You are looking pretty foolish right about now. Just take a few extra minutes when this happens to you and assume that the kid belongs to a hot chick and most of all, keep your anger under-raps, or no "getting lucky" for you.
GIRLS AND GUYS, THIS IS A SIMILAR SITUATION that if you do not first think before speaking, you could end-up unemployed. I am totally-serious. Let's pretend that your overbearing boss has called you into his office for a "brain-storming" session about new ideas for the company to make more money. He leaves his office door open. This is a sign for you to be "sharp as a tack." Suddenly, without warning, during your talk with the boss, this twelve-year old girl walks by the boss' office grinning and just being a young person. You laugh outloud and foolishly remark, "did ya' see that, boss? That girl is so ugly she should be named "Muddy Fence." Good luck finding a new job, for you have forgotten that today was "Bring Your Daughter To Work Day," and "Muddy Fence" was your now-ex-boss' daughter. Didn't your boss' veins sticking out on his head mean anything to you?
HEY, GUYS. PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO THIS ONE and I am sorry if you think that I am picking on you, but I am not. I am here to help you avoid confusion, fights, and humiliation. My advice to you, if you are already-engaged to marry the "love of your life," is to get to know and meet every female relative she has. Even those who live in far-away lands. If you don't, well this could happen to you. You are sitting on the couch one evening and she asks, "want to see some photos?" Sure. As an engaged-guy, you are very agreeable. While sifting through the photos, you just have to say, "who's this dog?" Referring to a girl who is cosmetically-challenged. Well, buddy. Welcome back to the single life, for this "dog," was her older sister, "June," who lives in Michigan. I am serious. Avoid embarrassment and know your girlfriend's female relatives.
GIRLS OR GUYS, THIS SITUATION IS PRESENT ALMOST EVERYDAY as you enter or exit any store in your town. You are in a big hurry to meet your new girl (or boy) friend at the local Burger King and man, is he (or she) hot! Your arms are full of new clothes you have just bought inside the store and this elderly man (or woman) is in your way walking as fast as a 90-year-old can walk. And there it is. Your "anger area." "can you hurry up, old timer?" you blurt out without thinking. You have not only hurt his old man (or woman's) feelings, but made a fool of yourself in public. Just take it easy and let the senior citizen move at his (or her) own speed.
HEY, CUSTOMER REP'S, THIS IS FOR YOU so pay close-attention. Briefly, the most-annoying, irritating thing that can ever be said to a customer is, "can you hold for a minute while I get my boss?" Oh at the awful swearing your sensitive ears will hear. And this customer is not an ex-Marine, but an elderly granny with a bad phone. Be nice. Be cool. And think before you speak. If you want to keep this job.
OKAY, YOU HAVE PARTIED, BUT NOT DRANK ALCOHOL but a police officer pulls you over as you go home. Just a routine traffic stop. You forget that you are sober and panic. Bad move. Then you do something even more stupid. You say to the cop, "don't check my breath, haw, haw," this will only arouse suspicion. Be still. Be quiet and he will let you go. Deal?
Just want to say "thanks" to you for taking time to read this self-help hub. I am not trying to tell you how to live your lives, but how you can have an easier life.
And I encourage you to copy down this information and keep it tacked-securely to your bathroom or bedroom wall just in-case a situation I talk about in this story arises.
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