We Don’t Talk: Understanding Communication: Essential Poetry by Pearldiver

And why 'We Don't Talk'

We Don't Talk - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.
We Don't Talk - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved. | Source
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Understanding Communication.

There are times in many friendships and relationships when for whatever reason, the very skillful art of communication is completely ignored, or is taken for granted, or just simply breaks down in a manner that puts unnecessary strain on that relationship. Times like that therefore tend to highlight the difference in levels of understanding between the parties.

Understanding how to communicate with each other effectively is crucial to the degrees of respect, growth potential and ultimately, the very survival of every relationship. Being able to maintain good relationships requires a lot of work from both sides. The very ability to realize and adopt that practice, calls on the parties to possess a depth of commitment that is not only emotionally mature, but also able to be trusted, relied upon and mutually respected.

Basically, if you care enough to care, then care enough to always care fully. Set that expectation in place as part of the key aspects within the foundation of the relationship, in such a way that ensures this commitment and attitude will always be respected.

To some however, that commitment thing, or rather the making of it, is in itself an issue. If so, then many problems are going to be forthcoming, that will put the relationship at risk, or call for a series of concessions to be made, generally by the party most prepared to commit. Factually, caring for someone is not in any way, something that should call for concessions; most of us wish to be accepted for who we are and therefore hope that our relationships will be unconditional. True friendship is a non judgmental thing, therefore it is also something that is very special, as many social environments today call for us to adopt a judgmental approach towards those we consider to be friends.

Another important thing to consider is that by understanding yourself and what your needs really are, you have the opportunity of being able to develop good communication skills, as long as the other party is able to openly do the same. If however, the relationship breaks down or turns pear shaped for some reason, then at least a mutual understanding exists of those needs and can provide a welcome platform for both parties to attempt to resolve their issues in a realistic and amicable manner. Established common ground is always important.

Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.

Original Fibonacci # 126 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.
Original Fibonacci # 126 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved. | Source

Communication continued....

Talking and listening is always going to be the greatest form of communication in any friendship or relationship, as it provides open evidence of the level of understanding, at any time, gauged merely from each party's willingness to engage and maintain conversation that is meaningful to each other. Not communicating is often used as a defensive tool to non verbally get a point across, generally one that 'says' "I don't care!" Factually, many who adopt that approach, really do care, but are also inwardly afraid of getting hurt or themselves rejected. We humans are complex animals, but deep down, we often seek the very things that we are afraid of, yet fail to communicate that to the ones that we do care for.

Not talking through unresolved issues is one perfect way to create a negative outcome. Many often also use negative excuses for not communicating and to justify their fear of commitment or lack of self respect, effectively hiding behind that act of avoidance. While not approaching the reasons why it is felt that not talking, is the way to solve a problem, what can and often does result is, that a permanent lack of communication skills is developed and over time that turns inwardly into anger and perceptions that have little bearing on the original decisions made. Of course, those are the exact occasions when talking really does have the ability to show how important any established common grounds really are and how much stronger they are when measured honestly, against perceived problems.

Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.

Original Fibonacci # 125 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.
Original Fibonacci # 125 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved. | Source

Communicate... Tell the world what is really in your heart...

Below is another piece of poetry by Pearldiver called; 'We Don't Talk'. This poem relays a message for those who don't make the effort to care fully enough to not find reasons to avoid talking. Also the enclosed set of 5 Fibonacci poems on the subject of Communication give a positive reason why, or how communication is worthwhile. But effectively, all communication should be taken for what it really represents - the ability to allow others to care for us and to show them, that we are worthy of the respect required to be that someone who genuinely cares enough to be loved and appreciated genuinely.

Communication makes the world go round... after that has been established... love keeps it turning. Take the time in your life, to communicate with those in your world; let them know what really is in your heart. Remember: A true friend will not judge you and to be a true friend, one needs to always care fully.

Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.

Real Communication Counts..

Dreams Like These 077
Dreams Like These 077 | Source
Dreams Like These 071
Dreams Like These 071 | Source

Understanding Why...

‘We Don’t Talk’


We don’t talk

It’s been so long now, that I don’t know why

I must have really hurt you in some way

Perhaps only because we didn’t talk

When we both needed to hear

What we both needed to say



We don’t talk

And the silence comes and goes

In waves of sadness, sometimes in crushed hopes

For it seems, that all you’ve ever meant to me, has been lost

I must have let you down, perhaps in you not knowing

What it takes to feel unbroken and how one copes



We don’t talk

And now you feel hurt and wounded

Each time I’ve tried to reach out to let you know

All the things that you don’t understand

A chance to share answers as to why, we don’t talk

And why in this silence, insecure reasons, were allowed to grow



We don’t talk

So heartfelt words seem cast to the winds

Destined to lie and decompose, where they fall

Their timeless value lost to a care’s desire, to leave them there

I guess they carry all the things that you don’t want to hear

And so, we don’t talk and perhaps you wrongly believe

That I don’t love you at all...


* Words by Pearldiver *

Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.

Original Fibonacci # 124 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.
Original Fibonacci # 124 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved. | Source
Original Fibonacci # 123 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.
Original Fibonacci # 123 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved. | Source
Original Fibonacci #122 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.
Original Fibonacci #122 - Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved. | Source

Please VOTE here for the best.

Which of these poetry pieces did you prefer most?

  • Fibonacci # 126
  • Fibonacci # 125
  • 'We Don't Talk'
  • Fibonacci # 124
  • Fibonacci # 123
  • Fibonacci # 122
See results without voting

There are always good words available and just waiting to be used, in every relationship.

Moving on positively..

Often we don't know all the facts to something that worries or concerns us and as a result, we tend to perceive the reality of the situation as being, what we feel it is.

So often we are wrong... but that's not the issue... the issue is... accepting our mistake and making sure that our information is not flawed... thus allowing us to make an informed decision in a non judgmental way, based on what we know, as opposed to what we don't, or what we perceive to be true.

Remember - In one way or another, every single relationship that you have or have had, has at some time relied upon you and your ability to care enough, for yourself and the other party, to at least attempt to communicate effectively! Have you ever considered that point objectively? If not, then also seriously consider the words within the poem 'We Don't Talk' as they represent a real life relationship, perhaps similar to one of yours... cheers, take care.

Copyright © 2012 Pearldiver – Art of the Diver with all rights reserved.

Thanks for reading this page.

Nightlight.
Nightlight. | Source

More by this Author


Thank you for leaving your comment below: 26 comments

Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

I hope you enjoy this unique hub.... PD


isenhower33 profile image

isenhower33 4 years ago from Crothersville, IN

I like how you incorporated so much in this hub, very unique, great job and I vote it up :)


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi isenhower33, thanks for taking the time to review and comment on this work... as you can see, I don't write conventional pages and much prefer to incorporate informative text, poetry and images, in my own way as opposed to how others contribute here... glad you appreciated my efforts... I will be sure to read some of your works also.. cheers.. take care... PD


isenhower33 profile image

isenhower33 4 years ago from Crothersville, IN

It was a great read, and I look forward to more of your writings as I followed you on here :) You take care as well


always exploring profile image

always exploring 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

Loved your poetry. communicating is so important in a relationship. Your images are perfect for this piece..Thank you..


Denise Handlon profile image

Denise Handlon 4 years ago from North Carolina

This is a beautiful hub, and I love the intricacies of the poetry, images and poetic statements in the image. As isenhower33 mentioned: very unique...and creative. Rated UP/I/A


khmohsin profile image

khmohsin 4 years ago from London,UK

Pearldiver,

I liked your unique ideas. No doubt communication makes the relations perfect.

tweeted and shared with friends too


SkeetyD profile image

SkeetyD 4 years ago from Barbados

Your poem seemed so sad yet thoughtful and deep-seated in passion, you really conveyed how you do truly love this person but you can't communicate how strong your feelings are and it comes across as silence. Excellent hub


shiningirisheyes profile image

shiningirisheyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

Great communication, when practices regularly makes for a happier life and promotes good relationships of all kinds.

Always a wonderful read.


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi Ruby, thank you for your kind, positive comment and for taking the time to read 'We Don't Talk' ... kind of a 6 for 1 poetry hub this one, as I needed to attach my Fibonacci works to a poem like this one. Glad you enjoy my efforts Ruby... cheers... you take care... PD


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi Denise, thank you for your kind compliments on this piece... I'm glad you appreciated my efforts and picked up on the paths taken within 'We Don't Talk.' I do appreciate your positive input and comments... cheers for that... you take care... PD


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi khmohsin, thanks for calling by and reading this piece... glad you liked the poetry and images... I do appreciate your positive support and the share... cheers for that... you take care... PD


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi SkeetyD, nicely reviewed and yes that is exactly right and is one interpretation of the poem 'We Don't Talk' ... glad you enjoyed this piece and took the time to leave such a positive compliment... thank you for your input... cheers.. you take care... PD


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi shiningirisheyes, ah it is always wonderful to see that you have read my poetry... thanks for always taking the time to and for reviewing this piece positively... I may have been stating the obvious to some degree and in regard to communication, but as you know, it is really is a key relationship ingredient that so many don't do well with, for a variety of reasons... I believe, being able to speak from the heart is so important... irrespective of reasons why not... cheers for calling by... you take care... PD


lilyfly profile image

lilyfly 4 years ago from Wasilla, Alaska

I am so happy to say that, my closest friends, who were alienated by my depression over my Mother , for 7 years, (which broke my already broken heart), came by, t0 drop seasoned wood in my lap, when Iwas out of good wood, and fuel, freezing.

I Always thought, (knew) they were the best people on earth, after all, I got them together thirty years ago, knowing they were meant to be together... I was able to hug Nick and Sheila, the people I have valued most in this world, and say, out loud, to both, I love you.

A burning fire, a few dogs, some food, and good friends ,love in my heart. Is there anyone luckier on the planet tonite?

You are right, Pearl. Love must be expressed to give, and receive, I guess it's hard for me to feel I deserve it, but, if such worthy people choose to give me that awesome gift, I must not be far wrong.

There is nothing greater than love. I love yaz, lily


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi Lily, wow... this poem 'We Don't Talk' is very relevant to you also then... you have expressed your words here with great imagery of a writer's solitude and what it takes to 'reward' our persistence... I'm glad you like this work and I appreciate your positive comment.

Yes..the power of good wood means many things to many people, but when it creates the ability to communicate again with those we love, than perhaps it is good wood that came from a wise tree...

Everyone 'deserves' to believe in themselves Lily... when you put down that belief, you remove your ability to accept the very things that you need in life, to not freeze... Be well and take care... honor the spirit of the opportunity, the fire and the writer..... PD


lilyfly profile image

lilyfly 4 years ago from Wasilla, Alaska

Pearl, I have found all trees wise... it's only humans that have a problem with life, and thank you for your kind words. your poems have always made me think, have moved me, as all great poetry should. Love right back at you! lily


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Cheers for that Lily, you are most welcome... take care..


Joy56 profile image

Joy56 4 years ago

I enjoyed your work. Probably a bit deep for 12 o'clock Sunday evening, but i related........

Communication....... so many reasons why it can be difficult, so many. A great subject to attempt, i would not know where to start.

you can be communicating, and be so misundersood in your communication, if you have an unreceptive audience. Must come back and take another look at this.


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi Brenda, thanks for taking the time to read and comment on this work.. If my poetry is found to be 'deep' then I have reached the plains on which I prefer to write on... that place that makes people 'think' and consider the subject from a wider perspective than they are used to... I'm lucky, I guess as that tends to be a place many wish that they could achieve in their writing... factually, I am a deep person and prefer to tell it straight, as I see it...

I don't want to write about what I know of life and my vast range of experiences in simple terms... I would be betraying the life and experiences that 'I know' and thus could not write from the heart, as deep or irrelevant as it may be considered...

Communication is 2 way thing in that it requires at least 2 steps for anyone to take, to achieve the objective... Having an unreceptive audience can also be assessed on that basis, but it takes only 1 step for someone to not bother to listen... and it only takes 1 step to ensure the words offered are worthy of the opportunity to communicate, if the audience is indeed worthy of the words! Why waste pearls huh?

Nice to see you Brenda, hope life is good for you and your audience appreciates all the words you communicate, as much I do :) Cheers... you take care.. PD


Vincent Moore 4 years ago

My eloquent scribe. You have brilliantly described why many of us are alone today. In my case, I've always been a great communicator in my business life, yet when it came to communicating properly with a woman it mostly turned into a disaster over the long haul. Oh sure, the lust and love was there always, but when we grew deeper into each others lives over time the communication levels started to wither on the vine.

I truly believe if we both could have TALKED and LISTENED properly our relationships would have had more merit. I seem to be able to communicate on a friendship level or even dating, but when it comes to commitment and living under the same roof and sharing eveything intimate and professional I tend to sink the ship. I suppose I never really was the marrying kind, although I love deeply when I love.

Like the late crooner Frankie Sinatra sang. "I Did It My Way" could apply to my demise as a husband and partner in any woman's life. Now I live alone, enjoy my own music, cook what I like to cook, keep guarded secrects, enjoy a few close friends, and now write about all my successes, failures and near misses in my life. Thank you for sharing this very insightful write, it hit home with me. I am envious of those who can stay in love with deep respect for each other forever until the end. I unfortunately am a casuality of failed marriages. Peace and blessings I send to you this eve my scribe. Voted UP and shared.


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi there Ken, I am honored to have you read, assess and comment so deeply on this work... thank you for taking the time to do so... Yes, I guess that 'We Don't Talk' actually does describe why so many are alone! I hadn't considered it from that perspective, but clearly should have.

As you have stated, many relationships would work out if those things needed to be heard and needed to be said, were mutually expressed and respected... it is often from the benefit of hindsight, found as a result of great soul searching, that such a realization becomes so glaringly obvious, standing out from an ego that has held it chained with excuses.

Don't be so hard on yourself mate, what you have described is I'm sure a fear of letting go the very thing that you seek... If you can... you will allow the relationship to develop into one of genuine value and commitment... it is a self imposed catch 22, in that you must do what your protective instincts tell you not to do... let go, totally unconditionally, rather than hold on and try to build conditionally... The Ultimate Test of Self... (there, that's great title :) )

Mind you... there will always be a price, often initially unmeasurable, for any man in love, who chooses to hold onto guarded secrets which for whatever reason, serve only to undermine his ability to commit to the true potential of any relationship... and his unconditional self! Believe me, nobody is alone on that one... hope you understand what I mean... things ultimately come down to a 'choice'

Really appreciate your candor and vulnerability, but I can't as a friend, emphasize enough how much you need to communicate to your soul, your need to trust in... your soul (first)... that is the true measurement of one's success Ken... that gives one the true value of love.... Good hunting, my friend :) You have a worthy foe! :) Take care... PD


Joy56 profile image

Joy56 4 years ago

here i am back again. I am changing my thoughts about so many things, and communication is one of the subjects i have been thinking quite deeply about......

I sadly have not written much of late, but am enjoying reading and learning......... Deep is good, Keep writing and indeed communicating. Do you ever get fun in the forums ....... Those were the days. x


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hello there I am back again, good... it's always been a woman's perogative to change her mind... so it's good to know that you still find it an essential part of the package.. I think at the moment it is quite important search engine wise to be writing occasionally here, so that you don't lose all your previous hard efforts... so it's time (to change your mind maybe). There is no longer any fun in the forums here, they have been systematically broken down as with what seems a bit of a divide and conquer strategy community wise Brenda... Hard to see wise souls like Randy and several others no longer able (banned) or no longer bothered with the site's policy-maker's favorites... Pretty sad really... it was a brilliant site before when creative personalities were allowed to mingle... Thanks for keeping in touch Brenda.. hope you get into your writing again..take care... PD


LaThing profile image

LaThing 4 years ago from From a World Within, USA

Beautiful poem, very touching ..... I can truly relate to your poem. I just wish someone else had written it! We were friends and some misunderstanding tore us apart, and I have so many things to explain..... But it's seems late now! Your poem seems so alive, and true.


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 4 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time. Author

Hi LT, thank you for your review of We Don't Talk... I appreciate your words here and I'm sure many others also have experienced this situation. The perception of being too late is one which really only endorses an excuse for not doing, or making a real effort to resolve the issue in many cases... and I guess, that in itself makes the whole lack of communication thing a lot sadder.

Quite a hard subject to write on, so I'm glad that you feel life within the poem... having a pulse is after all, a very important factor in the life of written words and the poets who share them... cheers for your positive input LT... take care.

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