Weddings: Who Pays for What These Days?

Even though wedding costs have dropped considerably on average since the recession, weddings are still expensive. Average cost: About $20,000.

So is the bride's family supposed to shoulder the entire cost?

NO!

In ancient days, men had so many daughters that it behoved them to pay for their weddings and would throw in a dowry to boot, (if they were lucky enough to marry them off), and that's how the tradition of the bride's parents paying for the wedding festivities made its way to the modern world.

Today, as many couples pay for their own weddings as those who have their parents shoulder the cost--and a third of today's weddings are paid for by "communal" effort, meaning that everyone contributes including the bride's and groom's parents and the bride and groom.

These statistics mean that tradition is changing!

The days of the bride's parents paying for the entiere wedding cost are over! Weddings are just too expensive to shoulder one family with the expense. 

That's why wedding costs must be porportionately shared by all involved. If the bride's parents are paying for the food, for example, then the groom's should pay for the liquor. if the bride's parents are paying for the flowers, then the groom's should pay for the band... etc. 

And this doesn't leave the bride and groom off the hook, either. If both are employed and can contribute--then they should!

Many brides encounter future in-laws, who refuse to contribute even if they're financially able. This can cause terrible problems for the bride and her parents, who are expected to bear the burden of the entire wedding cost.

At this point, it's up to the bride-to-be's fiancé to take matters into his own hands and explain to his family that weddings are two-way streets, and that if they refuse to contribute, then he'd appreciate a contribution to the wedding in lieu of a wedding gift.

Hopefully, that will solve the problem!