What's A Blind Date?

Can I take it off now??
Can I take it off now??
Hold still...I don't want to miss!
Hold still...I don't want to miss!

"I know this really nice single girl...."

Cupid is alive and well and living amongst us. This innocent-looking little angel, bow and arrow in tote, gets around. He'll show up just about anywhere and can strike when you least expect. Legend has it, Cupid is the Angel of Love. If he aims his arrow of kisses & bilss at unsuspecting lonely hearts, they are bound to find true love.

OK, this is silly. I'm sorry. I know you're all mature adults and would never entertain such childish nonsense. I also know that a whole bunch of us have friends who love to play Cupid. There's something about an available single male or female that obviously annoys the heck out of some people. These are the helpful, caring friends, neighbors and co-workers who just can't leave well-enough alone. They talk about you being single as though you have a terminal illness. "It's sad. I hate seeing Joe all alone.....no dates, so lonely. He needs someone."

Really? This is news to Joe. Recently promoted, making the big bucks, healthy and in great shape, driving a brand new car and living the good life.... Dancing to his own rhythm, singing his own sweet tune, answering to no one. Oh yeah, that'll do it. This is reason enough for people to insist he needs a woman. Uh-Huh, Joe's female friends are thinking, "What a catch! He's every woman's dream.....Think, girls! Who can we fix him up with?" Even his male friends, his best buddies, the guys who stick by through thick and thin, yeah even them.....especially them. What they're thinking is, "Rotten S.O.B.....just look at him! Why should he be so damned happy and free? That's it! He's FREE! We need to change that, real quick!"

Just you and me..in private!
Just you and me..in private!

What would we ever do without FRIENDS?

Sometimes, it looks like what you're not going to do is remain single and carefree. Not if they can help it and not for long.

Does any of this strike a chord with you? Have you ever been "fixed up," by well-meaning friends?
If you have, the experience has stayed with you, whether disastrous or fabulous. From the very day you were accosted, prodded and coerced, to that final moment...the end of the blind date,when you said, "Good Night." If you've never had a blind date, quit smiling. You're next.

Truth is, once you've had a chance to call and talk to the hottest chick in town, (sworn to by your buddies) the ice has broken and it's not so bad after all. You might even be looking forward to it. Hey, maybe everyone is right. You do need to date, meet a woman, get out and have some fun. But a Blind Date? C'mon, Joe, think about it.

You have nothing more than her first name and phone number. Good move, Joe. Really smart. Who is she? More importantly....Whoa Dude, what does she look like? Blonde? Brunette? Tall? Nice body? Man, face it, you have no idea what to expect Saturday night when you knock on that door. Bimbo? Snob? PSYCHO??! No Joe, don't go there. You can't call the girl and make some feeble excuse about how you just happen to remember you have Bible Study on Saturday night. Forget it. You're in now pal, just relax and everything will be fine.



PLEASE, look like Brad Pitt.
PLEASE, look like Brad Pitt.

Yes, Ladies.....you too.

Girls, let's be honest. We love playing matchmaker. In fact, we all believe we know exactly who is perfect for whom and want to take sole credit for the hook up....because we're already imagining the bride will toss her bouquet directly into our hands.

I've done it. I played the game as Ms. Cupid. I've also been the target and said, "Yes," to a blind date.....twice. If you desperately want your female friend to go out with your former college buddy, here's the key phrase that hooks 'em every time. "Honestly Lori, I swear.....if I wasn't engaged, I'd scoop this baby up myself!!" Ah yes, women trust other women when it comes to all things, MAN. Further, just knowing another woman lusts after a guy makes another woman, maybe lots of women want him. Don't balk. You know that's true.

The female thought process is entirely different than the male process......like anybody reading this might need me to say this? . Anyway, what I'm getting at is, the first thing we do is check our closet for the perfect, "guaranteed to snag him," outfit. Make a string of appointments: Hair, nails and facial. Uh huh girls, this guy's done like dinner!" And speaking of dinner. As you can clearly see,the reason that women expect the man will buy dinner is that we spend all our money getting ready for the date.


You're more than I hoped for!
You're more than I hoped for!

Blind Date night.... The unveiling

Only the very first ten to fifteen minutes is a bit painful. Feeling awkward, just a little nervous and apprehensive. Some simple niceties exchanged, a friendly smile, maybe a proper "nice to meet you," quick hug. It's all cool. No big deal. What were you so worried about? He's cute, she's really friendly. No huge frights or disappointments.

Now the date begins. From this point on ......I can't believe what just went through my twisted mind!....I had an incredible urge to print out The Miranda Warning in it's entirety just then.

I have no idea why that occurred to me. I'm not that kind of person that would throw in some sarcastic twist here. Not at a time like this. I mean, it can be really important to have some sound advice about what to expect on a blind date, some possible tips on things to do, conversations to have. I'm sure people are counting on me to be helpful.

Really, I'm sorry. It's so strange, all I can think to offer is the Miranda Warning.

But hey! Don't even think about leaving this page before watching the video below!

Go ahead...LAUGH!

Interesting Blind Date Video

More by this Author


Comments 92 comments

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 15 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Au Fait...I LOVE your comment! The more I get to know you, the more I just know you and I could be Best-Buds! LOL As I read this, I asked myself...."Did I write this?!" There's a big check mark next to every word you said!

The women who have given alleged tips?? Yeah...ah NO, not too smart. Not smart at all. YOU are the one who should be giving the tips until these ladies get a clue! LOL

Fortunately the men who are worth dating or even getting to know, are mature, intelligent men who respect an independent, interesting, self-assured woman. It's the losers who want women who are......well, losers too.

Frankly, I haven't the slightest inkling to date. The mere thought of that dreaded routine sends shivers up my spine. I just mentioned this to a friend of mine and she said, "Yeah GF, those days are so long gone, don't you wonder why it was ever so important??" We both laughed as we continued to come up with very funny one liners....

If there was a Best Answer choice for our hubs, believe me, today you're the winner! LOL...Thanks so much Au fait. Reading your comments is my entertainment!


Au fait profile image

Au fait 15 months ago from North Texas

Glad I came back to read this again. Nope, I've never been on a blind date arranged by someone else, nor have I ever arranged a meeting for other people in the way of a date.

No, I have never searched my closet for the perfect outfit and I have never gone to the lengths you describe, getting my hair done, nails, done, etc. to impress a date. I am who I am. May as well discover that right away.

No, what other women think doesn't impress me. Most of the women I have known will put up with anything -- including a regular fist in the face -- just to keep that paycheck coming into the house.

Can't tell you how many times other women have told me I have to let guys win, have to learn to drink more because they do, have to get used to them 'looking' and desiring other women, even being with other women, because that's how men are.

One woman, fairly attractive, said the reason she put up with being treated disrespectfully and rudely was because she didn't want to be alone. A lot of men tend to get the idea all women are the same, because so many women are similar to what I've described here. Both men and women are usually somewhere between shocked and offended when I'm not.

Of course the reason so many women fall in line is because men expect it and they're spoiled terribly. Most women don't seem brave enough to face disappointing what a man expects. They'll take the rudeness and abuse if it comes to that.

Never felt nervous on first dates either. Not since I turned 30 -- a while ago now. I can have a conversation with anyone, just pick the subject. Can also learn what really matters (to me) about most men without their ever knowing it through conversation.

Enjoyed this article and I'm sure most women (and probably most men) can identify with what you say. Yes, it's funny too. You write humor better than anyone I know, and I think that's a true gift. I'm not sure a person can learn that. A person either has the natural ability or they don't. I think you have it.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 23 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

and of course the same to you SFAM! You and the Captain and all the chickies, mates & babies!! Love you all


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 23 months ago from Orlando, FL

Happy New Year Effer!!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 23 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Peg.......Good for you for taking on the project of a Novel! I wish you much success. IMHO, it requires such seriousness & research, as well as confidence to step up to that plate, it's admirable.

Thanks for the positive feedback. While I've not ever been on a "blind" date.....I have certainly been on a few where I wish I could have kept my eyes shut!!........LOL. "Happy New Year!...Peace, Paula


PegCole17 profile image

PegCole17 23 months ago from Dallas, Texas

Paula, you are so witty and thorough in your detail about blind dates and their consequences. Truly, this came at the perfect time for me to refresh my memory about the whole set-up process. I'm editing a chapter in my novel where the heroine talks about being the object of everyone's perfect matchmaking target. It has provided a new angle to this for me. Thank you. Voted up and funny, that's for sure. Miranda warning...lol.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

With a name like "lovedoctor," who would even consider trying to fix you up with a blind date?!!...........I'd be sure you can do quite well on your own!! LOL


lovedoctor926 3 years ago

I went on a blind date several years ago and had a horrible time. Many of my friends enjoy playing Cupid. I don't like the idea of getting fixed up with anyone. voted up funny!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

I think we ALL saw the "Graduate,".......and let's not forget that the graduate was calling his OLDER lover, "Mrs. Robinson," in and out of bed!! Speaking of the '60's....I'm a die-hard Boomer, of course.....so 2 decades older, sort of creeps me out, Paul. LOL...It's much too Mommy/Daddy complex to suit me.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand

Paula, that depends. Some younger guys like a woman 20 years older. It just depends on what the man is expecting from the woman. Do you remember the 60s movie, "The Graduate" with Dustin Hoffman and Ann Bancroft?


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Paul.....LOL......Thanks so much for sharing. My hub obviously put you in the "sharing" mood.......after all, setting up a buddy with a blind date, is a bit like wanting to "share the misery!".......?

Always look at the bright side. Being 5 inches taller than you, is better than 20 years older?


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand

Paula,

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this hub, and I found it very funny, interesting, and useful. When I was in college, I went on quite a few blind dates. About half of the time, I liked the coed that I was fixed up with. The most awkward situation was finding my date to be five inches taller than me!! It's really true how married guys envy their buddies who are free and single. Voted up and sharing with followers and on Facebook. Also Pinning and Tweeting.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Lilly/Lori.......Glad you enjoyed my hub. LOL.....the truth is, I believe the Miranda Warning was created exclusively for women....to be given as a "gift," when we think we've stumbled upon a potential "keeper."

"Follow this warning, honey.....and you stand a good chance!!" LOL!!!


LillyGrillzit profile image

LillyGrillzit 3 years ago from The River Valley, Arkansas

I love this! A very literal thinker, when I am advised that a tentative 'blind date's wants to know if he should pick me up or will we meet at the____________…I need that Miranda warning. Another problem I have with trying to date, are so many grown men have been well...grounded. What did they do to get grounded their whole lives? LOL Voted up and laughed a lot.


Au fait profile image

Au fait 3 years ago from North Texas

It's OK to laugh. I meant it to be funny -- even though it's also true. ;) I think it's important not to take oneself too seriously!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

OMG! NO! I think YOU'RE great!!!.....and there is nothing funny about the truth you speak!!!..........


Au fait profile image

Au fait 3 years ago from North Texas

I think you're great, love to read your stuff, you're funny Paula, but I have no interest in a man that all the women are crazy about. I figure those guys have such big heads from all that attention that their egos would be way to inflated for me to handle. Besides, I'm used to getting all the attention myself. ;)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Laurinzo...Quite true.....Valentine's Day IS around the corner....Now I'll have to run to the aid of a single friend, won't I? Can't have anyone be alone on Valentine's Day, can we? Even if they WANT to be alone!..LOL


Laurinzo Scott profile image

Laurinzo Scott 3 years ago from Phoenix, Az.

This is soooo perfect with Valentine's Day around the corner... I am voting up and sharing...definitely!!!!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

The big problem it...as I see it......The dates that our friends think are the perfect match for us, don't even come close to the kind of person we are attracted to! Like you say...I'll choose my own dates, thank you!


lovedoctor926 4 years ago

I have the perfect guy for you! I don't like any of my friends or relatives fixing me up with any guy. It's pretty annoying! It's like saying I have to find you someone because you are not capable of finding someone on your own. Lol. I pass.. I totally agree with your comment above that people who are attached can't leave single people alone! Anyway, I like to be the one to pick and choose the hunks..Voted up funny!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

LOL......Like I said in a sneaky manner...."Misery loves company!" People who are attached....can't leave single people alone!!


Jools99 profile image

Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

Paula, only ever had one blind date - 1 was definitely enough :o( This was very funny, still chuckling. I didn't marry until my late 20s and I was sick of friends telling me they knew 'just the right bloke for you' Yeah, yeah, yeah....


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Yes we do....we seem to be compelled to pair up everyone!! Often, it works out well!


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up.

well done!! though i admit, we love playing matchmaker..


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Woo Hoo! Sure....let's cause a Hubpages scandal!! Oh, but you need to know, I'm actually promised to Dusty (we've been sharing love emails for some time now)...AND..I continue to threaten Wesman that he needs a GOOD woman to straighten his butt out...and if I can't find one for him, he may be stuck with me. I don't care if I'm 10 years older than his mother. I am shameless.......and I have a hub crush on several other guys who stalk the pages here..........but, if you give me your schedule, I'll fit you in. I'm so pleased! Some guys get all hung up about an old great granny who has multiple affairs going on...so glad you're cool..with this!!

About your nightmare attempt at playing cupid with your wife as partner in crime.......How can we know ahead of time? Just plead the 5th!.........Later, Mohan.....well, not too much later...you know, my meds and early bedtime....


Docmo profile image

Docmo 4 years ago from UK

Heigh ho, Paula. I have been party to such a nefarious plot by by my better ( well ,she thinks so) half when she tried to set up a friend of ours with her cousin. What more, we chose to accompany the nervous couple on a foursome dinner plan. This buttock clenchingly awful night still wakes me up in a cold sweat. My cringe glands went hyperactive as my friend went into full weird mode and you could cut the air with a butter knife. Your delightful expose on this rotten practice is a welcome cry against all those who are plotting this act this very moment.. voted up of course, hon. Having said all that, I'll blind-date you anytime ;-)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

LMAO!!! The Witness Protection Program..........that's a good one, Cogerson!!


Cogerson profile image

Cogerson 4 years ago from Virginia

A very funny and well done hub. I think we all have some experience with a blind date...and most do not end very well. I especially liked the fact that you could not get the Miranda Warning out of your head. I think the thing going through my mind during my very bad blind date....was I need to go into the Witness Protection Program immediately. Voted up and funny....I true pleasure to read.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Eddy....thanks for visiting. Glad you enjoyed my blind date!!!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

ImKarn.....LOL...that is a classic! I love that you absolutely and immediately knew it was a situation that called for "Reverse!" I'm sure you saved yourself some wasted time and needless aggravation!! LOL....thanks for the visit!


ImKarn23 profile image

ImKarn23 4 years ago

Lol..poor confused Joe! people keep trying to set us singles up cause they can't stand that we're not as miserable as they are...lol..i once drove up to a restaurant where i was meeting a blind date(i've been on 2 - this was the 2nd..and last..lol)..i saw this guy standing outside smoking and i KNEW it was him...i just KNEW. Now..i'm a nice person, but - honest to god - i put her in reverse and drove home without a how do you do! and..i don't care if i roast in hell...lol..voting tweeting liking..


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

hahaha I totally DID! omg! Paula I went out there and there were flames shooting up...I even posted a photo on FB...caution...don't read interesting hubs while waiting for dinner to cook...you forget! lol

But great hub - I was interested for sure!!! hahahaha


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Kelly...Have the firetrucks left yet? LMAO....sorry, don't mean to laugh at your burnt dinner!!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Hmmm ya know...I don't think I have ever been on a blind date...but I have had several offers when I was single:)

Oh my Paula - yes...oh crap guess what? I have stuff buring on the grill! OMG! Byeee!


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

What a wonderful hub fpherj48 ;I loved it and here's to so many more to come.

Eddy.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

I am not single......but happily married to a man who shares my love of laughter....we make each laugh, daily. In fact,we behave like idiots, which is why we live far from any neighbors.....we're sure they'd call the paddy wagon on us.

Thank you for your flattery (I'm humbled) and I appreciate the share!


TToombs08 profile image

TToombs08 4 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

Effer, you are a comic genius! :) I loved it! Are you single, I know this great guy that could really use a woman with a great sense of humor...

Voted up and shared all over hell's half acre! :)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Martie.....Oh sure....leave it to our South African Princess to snag CUPID himself!! We should have known you'd get the BIG Kahuna!! LOL........I'm all happy and giggly for you, my dear friend!! Send pictures!!


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 4 years ago from South Africa

"OK, this is silly. I'm sorry. I know you're all mature adults and would never entertain such childish nonsense.... like Cupid aiming his arrow of kisses & bliss at unsuspecting lonely hearts, they are bound to find true love.."

Come again?

I'm looking back and see myself clearly as one of those adults not believing in Cupid. For many-many years I refused all dates whether they were incited by friends or direct. But recently I realized that I was missing out on a lot of fun, and so I've launched a mission to search for Cupid himself. And guess what? I found him in all his glory with arrow of hearts and bliss the works. Trust me, he is REAL :)

I once tried to play match-maker; I was so sure the two were meant for each other. But then I was rudely reminded by the man that he was old and wise enough to find his own mate. Damn punk! The road to hell is indeed paved with good intentions.

The years I've been single I enjoyed being alone. I really had no need whatsoever for company. Nobody was able to understand me and my 'weird' need to be alone. I was never lonely. The characters in the stories I wrote were my friends, and I was one of them, and the hero - the man of my dreams - was all mine. When the story came to its end - and posted to be published - I fell into a bottomless well of depression just to be saved again by a brilliant new idea of a story - a rendezvous with the man of my dreams.....

Excellent hub, Paula! You've hit a couple of nails on the head :)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Jeannie....I don't know what it is about singles, that make "friends" go in search of a partner for them. Do they simply look too damned happy?

La Thing.......I figure everyone should get used to being "dropped like a hot potato!!"


LaThing profile image

LaThing 4 years ago from From a World Within, USA

Hey, Paula, this is a great one, and what an ending, LOL, JUST DROP THEM like hot potatoes! I was waiting for more!! Love your way of writing.... Enjoyed it, and yeah, never went of a blind date.... Too scary *_*

Voting up and awesome!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD

I have been the victim of blind dates before, too. I really don't mind as long as my friends know a guy that really seems like my type. However, I hate the blind dates that are basically desperate attempts to hook me up with any single man. I can easily find my own dude to date by going on any online dating site. If I don't have anything in common with the guy, it is just not very nice. Sometimes I think it is all part of a big prank and I need new friends. Hehe. Fun hub and voted up!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

shruti.......Teenagers get to have lots of fun. At this time in your life, you're in the huge, deep, "dating pool," ......making choices, learning lessons, getting smarter! Good luck......Use your head. Keep a qualifications List at all times!


Phoebe Pike 4 years ago

I tried to make the best of it, but an hour into the date I started to imagine what it would be like if Johnny Depp suddenly showed up, round house kicked my date and became a stand-in. Needless to say, my imagination ran wild.


shruti sheshadri profile image

shruti sheshadri 4 years ago from Bangalore, India

hehe, this really connects to me... being a teenager! i do really feel silly now!

awesome hub, voted up:)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

You POOR girl. I don't even know what to say! How did you hang in there for the evening?? Bless your heart.......You may have felt like Cinderella....but it seems your date was NO prince!!! LOL


Phoebe Pike 4 years ago

The last blind date I went on I felt like Cinderella. His car was bright orange and rusting, he smelled like a chicken coop and his personality was basically evil stepmother material. To add to the insanity, somehow a mouse was in his car and I lost my shoe at the bowling alley. I wish I could say he was at least funny, but his only joke was "Knock, knock" -Who's there? "Me." -Me who? .... that was the end of the joke.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Aw. C'mon GTF.....it's FUN introducing people......Cupid is not responsible for Disasters! You didn't know this?? Horrid experiences are the fault of the daters. A warning and disclaimer is read and signed prior to all dates....no grudges allowed......!


Glimmer Twin Fan profile image

Glimmer Twin Fan 4 years ago

So funny! I stayed away from blind dates when I was single and don't set people up on them now. I did it once for a girlfriend years ago and it was a total disaster but I won't go into details here. Thanks for a good laugh.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Alecia:

Wow....your Mom must be the busiest cupid I've ever heard of. She needs to rest her wings and lay down her bow and arrow!! LOL

angel:

Good for you for being "picky." Wait for the right one! I'm sure he'll be the best!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

drbj.........If he's a typical man.......He Will be the latter, even if he's NOT breathing.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

Since I am older than soil, fpher, I only have two basic requirements for a blind date. One - he must be breathing on his own - no oxygen tank backpack; and Two - he must be erect. Voted your hub UP m'dear which is also the definition of the latter


angel115707 profile image

angel115707 4 years ago from Galveston, TX

Ha ha ha, very funny and cute! I thankfully avoid dating all together, I have to know a guy before I give him 1/2 a chance, yes I'm ultra picky. Seems my ghostman boss is a matchmaker, others say he's done it before, I got to know his suggested friend and I am not sorry he played matchmaker at all...lmao!

very awesome, voted up.


Alecia Murphy profile image

Alecia Murphy 4 years ago from Wilmington, North Carolina

My mom pulled the blind meeting act on me once. And it was with our long-term (former) hairdresser and friend's nephew. He was my age and in my grade and for some reason they thought we should date since we were both focused on studies. The problem? I didn't know that kid from Adam. My hairdresser came from a nice family but I never really considered dating her nephew. We knew each other in a roundabout way but beyond that I didn't sense anything. Nevertheless we didn't end up dating and I chewed out my mom. Thankfully she got the message and she hasn't pulled that act on me.

She's tried before with other family members. In fact she tried with two of my cousins (one from her side, one from dad's) and that didn't work out. And before that she tried to setup my dad's cousin with one of her old friends. Her latest attempt was my cousin and mom's co-worker. The guy looked up my cousin on Facebook and saw my cousin with her boyfriend- that finally taught her a lesson. You can't force who people like are or drawn to. While some instances of a blind date work, most of the time you shouldn't set people up unless they imply or ask for it. Fun hub Effer!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

OMG!!! I cannot believe you said that! Wait a minute. Yes I can. I jokingly told Jim one day I was going to find myself a wealthy 99 year old sugar daddy...and he jumped on that so quickly with....."Cut me in and I'll help you find him!"..........Aren't men wonderful? Such priorities.! Hey gf, thanks for the share!


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 4 years ago from New York

As always, this is a sidesplitter GF....me thinks she knows too much....giver and reciver of blind dates, oh my! From "rotten S.O.B." to "what a catch" you've captured it all! Really who has the right to remain single? Funny how we always seem to be in the same boat, I don't think Larry would appreciate me going on a blind date either...but then who knows, if the guy's rich we might be able to work something out ;)

Voted up, useful, funny, and interesting. Shared with my followers and pinned.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Hug .. Hug.. Kisses too......People will start" talking", ....ROFLMAO... LET 'EM!!!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

No, that's why I love you...not just like! :)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Good for you, Pop! No one can ever accuse you of being indecisive! Get to the point...now...Just do it! Your intuitions must be in peak form!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Looks like we experienced what might be called a communications BLIP!

Never fear.....AP ever on the ball....to the rescue!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Hiya, Tammy.....I play matchmaker often...but I've wised up and I am now "SNEAKY." I arrange what we might call, "chance meetings." This eliminates liability!! LOL! I think a few people are ON TO ME!! Time to change my tricks!! ..........I agree, Tammy....the thought of ever deciding to "date" again, leaves me cold and nauseous......NO THANKS!!

Oh...and not to mention the fact that Jim might just frown on his wife dating. Ya think?? lol


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

teaches....It sure can be a risk....but less of one when "cupid" is someone close to you and you trust him/her! What do they say? "Nothing ventured, nothing gained?" LOL......I know of both results from blind dates....Good & bad......so it's like gambling....but truth is, we gamble every day with life!!! Thanks so much teaches. Always happy to see you!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

That's me, Sunshine girl....Silly Nilly! I thought that's why you like me??!!


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breakfastpop 4 years ago

I went on only one blind date in my life and that was enough for me. The best part is that it lasted about 2 minutes. We left my friends's house and when we got to the bottom of the steps, I just said I thought this was a mistake and I walked away! I have never set up anyone in my life and I think I will keep it that way. Up funny and awesome!


Alastar Packer profile image

Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

Oh no no AP got himself turned around in the communicatin' dept. I've been trying to set up a friend with blind dates of and on and he always finds some excuse not to go lol. And AP knew you were married Effer, just meant in a general way being yourself and intuition.. Dang these night aid capsules from the doctor; back to the natural food store! LOL


tammyswallow profile image

tammyswallow 4 years ago from North Carolina

This is hilarious! I haven't played matchmaker in years. I don't want that liability.. LOL. Meeting people off the internet was enough to scare me away from that. Dating really, really, really sucks and I am glad I don't have to do it anymore. Great hub and thanks for the chuckle!


teaches12345 profile image

teaches12345 4 years ago

I have never had this opportunity, I think I would have been scared to try a blind date. I think it is taking a risk to set two people up, but some times it does work. What a fun look at this topic and so enjoyable to read.


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

No, No, No, Yes, No, No. There I think my Effer has all my answers. You are so silly!:)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Alastar....Gosh....sorry if I made it sound like I'm a candidate for blind dates! That's not quite so! I had a couple of blind dates in my adult life...long, long ago. But I am very much married and have been for 13 years!! LOL...........

So, you are fending off the blind date offers by your male friends.....quite successfully? Good for you, Alastar, hold your ground! lol It doesn't seem to me you would need any assistance in the dating dept!! Peace.


Alastar Packer profile image

Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

Hah ha Effer, that's true about the well-meaning men friends! Five or six years now and still no go with the bud on a blind date- one even a relative. Gotta admit the Miranda warning threw me at first...okay, got some help from the comments. Just be yourself and trust that remarkable female intuition and all should be fine- unless,..never mind...lol!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Nell Rose....Now THAT'S the kind of blind date I'm talkin about!! You are one crazy lady! I wanna hang out with you! That's definitely something I would have done........but how come so many times, girl? Don't they have any good-looking men across the pond?


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Ok Jaye...but here's a little tip, free of charge from the Prez of "Effers R Us"........You don't need to fix up a friend.......you need to fix up an enemy! Know what I mean? That gabby, gossipy woman that annoys you so much?..(Don't tell me you don't know someone like that...we ALL do)........Fix her up with the biggest loser you can find! AMUSEMENT, Jaye....we retirees have to think; Amusement!!!.....Then plead the 5th!!!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi effer, lol! love it! I remember going on a blind date! Oh it was sooo embarrassing! I walked in, took one look at him and thought yuck! haha! then I got stuck with him for three whole hours! then my mind clicked into place and i did the only thing I could think off, in fact its something I used to do quite often, here we go, hold breath! I climbed out the toilet window and legged it home! lol! true story, and in the end I got good at hooking my leg over that window ledge! totally true, but very baaaaad! haha! voted up! cheers nell


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Sunshine....Never went on a blind date, huh? Hmmmmm, ever go out with a blind guy? Or, maybe fall blindly in love with someone you didn't have the courage to flirt with.?.......OR.......were you ever blinded by a guy's good looks? How about a date with a guy who had no blinds on his windows? You might have been on a date that felt like the blind leading the blind......? HUH? What did you say? Oh, Wow, GF....you just blind-sided me!! lolololololololololololololololo

It's the E F F E R !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Ruchira.....One of mine was fun and pleasant....although he was NOT my type........the other date was one of those......"Oh Dear, I have a headache and must go home.".........and then, run like hell!! lol


Ruchira profile image

Ruchira 4 years ago from United States

Hi Paula,

Great and fun read. Never had a blind date although would have loved it 'cause the adventure of what kind of conversation to have etc would have been rolling on and also what kind of person he would be looks like...would be too good!!

But, thanks for taking me on this journey...loved it!


sen.sush23 profile image

sen.sush23 4 years ago from Kolkata, India

On the contrary Paula..they seem to have passed me by- probably considering me as too drab and uninteresting! LOL, I would have loved an adventure or two of the nature you mention !!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Suzie....Hey! Sounds like you're a success all the way around. ......when you had the blind date and when you set your brother up!! I hope your brother sent you a big check! LOL


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Happy Mariso.....If it's a man.....it's passionate....unless your definition and mine are different.......If that's your main requirement, you can leave the blindfold on and just grab the first warm male body that walks by!!! LOL!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Se bill.....I'll give up my story if you tell yours! You FIRST!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

sen.sush......Blind dates have been in vogue since the beginning of time and always will be. Obviously, you were one of those lovely and popular young ladies who never appeared to need any help!! LOL Good for you!


JayeWisdom profile image

JayeWisdom 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

Hilariously funny, Paula! Since I've had not one, but TWO, blind dates in my lifetime--one as a teen, the other as a 30-something divorcee--I can relate. Believe me, the Miranda warning is relevant! That is why I've always resisted the urge to "fix up" any of my friends with blind dates.


craiglyn profile image

craiglyn 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

The Miranda Warning - really "The Devil Made You Do It". Loved this hub as I am sitting here worrying the thought of "blind date". It happened to me last Christmas in my community, only the lady did not tell me she was trying to fix me up - in fact she denied it. BUT she invited me to a cocktail party at her house where there were about 24 people going -no guess it was 25 -because one guy was solo and I made 26. Gee thanks. No warning at all - just come! LOL


trish1048 profile image

trish1048 4 years ago

I had one blind date in my life, back in the summer of 1966. I was in-between boyfriends, and my mom's friend asked me if I would mind meeting a guy that was new at his job. Well, being the huge flirt that I was, I gave it a thought, and said sure, why not?

Well, we actually dated for two years and got married in 1968. I have two beautiful grown children and a grandchild to bless my life. My hubby and I had 20 wonderful years together (including the two when we dated), and sadly, at the tender age of 36, he was taken from me. He went out fishing one Sunday when I got a call to come to a hospital because there had been an accident. When I got to the hospital, I knew. He was gone, due to drowning. Although this story had a tragic ending, my blind date was a blessing in disguise.


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

I never had a blind date and never want one especially after all the stories I have heard about them. BUT the ironic part about your hub timing is that last night the family was trying to come up with a potential blind date for my daughters friend. Everyone was thinking "which guy" would be good while I was thinking "which girl"... we never came up with a possible "date." Maybe I'll just send her your hub instead. Minus my comment of course:)


Suzie HQ profile image

Suzie HQ 4 years ago from Dublin, Ireland

Hi Paula,

Oh what a laugh I had here! Been there . . .done that and more that have my collection of those damn T-shirts but . . . .try it I say to the non believers! Met my beloved on the internet (another story!!) then the first date (like a blind date kinda!!) that was 5 yrs ago, still going strong!. 4 yrs ago I set my brother up on a blind date with a friend I worked with. Now happily in wedded bliss with no.2 on the way! Thanks so much Paula for a great article, memory lane ambles and bucket load of laughs! Voting and sharing!!! :-)


nevjn 4 years ago

Hi there,

My name is Happy Mariso. I am a 43 yeas old heath doctor in CA.I wanna find a young man who can bring me passion. Of course I am single and live alone! If you wanna make friends with me please sign up on c_o_u_g_a_r_s_t_e_r_c_0_m and check me out! I’ll be right there for you, smart boy!


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billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

Paula, I was about to call it a night and to my complete surprise, you popped up, like a piece of perfectly done toast. :)

Great....this is rolling on the floor laughing my ass off great! Yes, I've been on one and yes, you described the process perfectly and yes, I survived and thank God, I never have to do it again.

Remind me to tell you about my only experience sometime.

bill


sen.sush23 profile image

sen.sush23 4 years ago from Kolkata, India

I guess this is very useful to lots of young healthy, merry singles- if they are in the process of being snagged for the first 'blind date'..to read and take care! Unfortunately, I am past that stage- and have survived all cupid's arrows, but blind dates were not much in vogue in my time! Ha, ha...lovely read. Up and Awesome.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

rcrumple.....wow...you're quick!! That's probably why you got yourself into all that damned trouble......Too quick!

Thanks for stopping by and actually liking my hub!!


rcrumple profile image

rcrumple 4 years ago from Kentucky

Anything you say can be used against you in a court of law, be it divorce proceedings or murder, whichever comes first! 32 years ago I went on my only blind date and got snagged, hooked, handcuffed, strapped for life, neutered, and whatever else you can call it. My cries for help were ignored and I am forever in search of the person that did it... so I can kill them! lol Funny, funny hub with a tremendous cut 'em off at the pass ending! Genius! Up & Funny & Awesome

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    Paula (fpherj48)844 Followers
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    Paula has freelanced for nearly 40 years. She has a passion for her forte of Behavioral Science & continuing education in this field.



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