Who cares what he's thinking? A new approach to dating

Mmmmm.. food....

Who cares what he's thinking? A new approach to dating

So much time is spent by women trying to figure out what it is that men are thinking. Does he love you? Does he think your ass looks large in that dress? Does he want to have babies with you? What is he thinking about when he has one hand down the front of his pants and is staring out the window blankly?

Here's a revelation ladies. It doesn't matter what he's thinking.

This may sound harsh at first, but once you think about it for a while, the logic of that statement is going to sink in. Anyone who has spend any length of time around almost any male soon realizes that he is probably either thinking about food, or sex, or both. That's about it. Even at occasions like funerals, graduation ceremonies, driving in rush hour traffic, or avoiding enemy fire whilst diving into trenches, the odds are that his mind is flicking between those two subjects.

There was a reason that those old 1950's housewife manuals advised women to look their best and cook good food. These are the sure fire biological ways to a man's heart. His thought processes play a happy second fiddle to those two drives, and are greatly influenced by them.

Are you worried about whether or not he wants to marry you? Don't. All you really need to worry about is whether or not he wants to sleep with you, and if you can make sure he gets the foods he likes. Once a man gets tired of chasing these two commodities, he is liable to settle down with the best provider of them.

It's not very romantic is it really? Does he have no soul? Of course he does. It's just that his more romantic, higher urges are likely to be stimulated initially by his desire to copulate with you, and secondarily the food related experiences he has around you. In today's world cooking has all but gone out the window as a marketable skill for women looking for husbands, but those who can do it well are still in high demand in some circles, as are women who have the number for Japanese restaurants who do really good sushi.

I've set up a special board on the right for feminists to hurl knives and other sharp objects at, perhaps the odd sharpened glass dildo even. That's perfectly okay, it is rather upsetting to find out that Grandma was right all along. Sure, you can drop the food aspect of things, but no guy wants to be with a woman who he doesn't want to sleep with, unless you count the gay men, who I would bet are probably with men they want to sleep with.

So, what are they thinking? It doesn't really matter, because you already know much of what they're thinking. It's not all about sex and food of course, they also hope that you won't yell at them, they don't like that much either. After that I think most of their thoughts revolve around what it would be like if they were ninjas, or super heroes.

This all sounds terrible, but what it really does is free you to think more deeply on what you think about him. Women, on average, spend far more time thinking about such emotional things, so you probably need all the time you can get.

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Comments 9 comments

tshirtscene profile image

tshirtscene 9 years ago

I'm not sure if it's intended, but your hubs give the distinct impression of being very "funny" and I do enjoy them, I've just read through 4 of them.

Hope Alexander profile image

Hope Alexander 9 years ago Author

Why thank you, I am very glad you do enjoy them, and find them "funny" (does this mean just plain weird I wonder, it wouldn't be the first time, you know :) ) Thanks for your comment!

tshirtscene profile image

tshirtscene 9 years ago

lol, I found them refreshing, and you are welcome :)

Hope Alexander profile image

Hope Alexander 9 years ago Author

Rock on tshirtscene!

Tina 9 years ago

Yes, indeed, this has a bit of truth to it doesnt it? going back to the days of the cavemen...women, food, and the urge to procreate

8 years ago

See, I knew men were idiots! Thanx for that!! Now I understand.

izettl profile image

izettl 8 years ago from The Great Northwest

Very good Hub! I always wondered why I had better luck dating than my friends and now I know why- I simply didn't go out of my way to worry about what the man thought- it actually attracted more guys by doing that. I bet you are totally right on the mark about what men mainly think about (food and sex). Very funny too!

notalezzy 7 years ago

how is it possible for an intelligent woman then to have a relationship with a man, knowing how base they are?

R3dcougar profile image

R3dcougar 6 years ago from Ireland

In a roundabout way you have said what we have all suspected - its not that men don't think, its just that they think of different things then we do. Women think about their feelings and relationships CONSTANTLY, while men think about actions. Men are goal-oriented and prefer to make plans and think about tasks related to their goals. And their goals usually have to do with scoring some sex...If we just stop asking men about their feelings and let them get on with expressing what they want with their actions, we will all be much happier!

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