Why It Is UNWISE for College/Postgraduate Degreed Women To EVEN CONSIDER Less Educated Men

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Opposites Do Not Necessarily Attract

The purpose of a college and/or postgraduate education is multifold. It gives one a better socioeconomic life. It makes one more culturally and intellectually cognizant of his/her sociocultural environment. It makes one think more coherently and logically. It also makes one totally appreciative of the higher and better things that life has to offer.

Tertiary education furthermore gives one a broader view of life. It gives one an exposure of higher and more varied and cultural things that a secondary education does not. College and/or postgraduate education affords one better jobs hence a commensurate standard of living than a person who is not college educated.

College and/or postgraduate educated people read more than high school graduates. In addition to that, their reading material is more advanced and complex. They also travel more and have more interests. If they elect to have children, those children will be more advantaged academically because their parents have the tools to educate them in ways that noncollege educated parents cannot do. Studies show that children of college and/or postgraduate educated parents have a more expansive vocubulary which they reach elementary school than their counterparts of less educated parents.

You see being college and postgraduate educated is advantageous all around. College and/or postgraduate educated women have the better jobs. They are also more socioeconomically independent and do not have to depend upon men economically like her less educated counterparts do. In addition to that, college and/or postgraduate women have their choice of men to pick regarding relationships. Of course, such women tend to attract similarly educated and professional men.

However, there are some college and/or postgraduate women who bemoan the supposedly lack of available men, particularly among some ethnic and/or racial groups. Some of these women portend that rather to be without a relationship, they settle for what they can get so to speak. There are college and/or postgraduate educated women who settle for men who are high school graduates and/or nonprofessional men. They reason that a man is a man regardless.

What these women fail to consider that they absolutely have little or nothing in common with such a man. Noncollege educated men usually have lower paying menial jobs that do not equal to that of her job either professionally and/or socioeconomically. Many a college and/or postgraduate educated professional woman often earns more than a noncollege educated man.

The college and/or postgraduate educated women will always outachieve and outearn this man. In addition to the socioeconomic parity between them, she is more cultural adept and savvy than he is. The average noncollege educated and/or blue collar men has an extremely narrow purview of life. They are usually content living for the moment and not planning for the future. Few noncollege educated and/or blue collar men are interested in advancing themselves either educationally or socioeconomically.

Because these men have not attained tertiary education, they deem such education to be totally unnecessary for survival. They believe that the purpose of schooling is solely to obtain employment and not for enrichment. The world educational enrichment is totally an anathema to the noncollege educated and/or blue collar man who have a different cultural purview. Many of such men consider a tertiary education and beyond to be totally baseless and superficial. Because of this belief, they are often mistrustful of higher education.

As a result of not attending college and/or higher forms of education, they are not exposed to the higher cultural and intellectual things that college affords. They are often contend with more mundane forms of entertainment. A noncollege educated and/or blue collar men cannot be asked to appreciate events such as attending plays and lectures because he was never exposed to such as a college and/or postgraduate person would be.

A college and/or postgraduate educated professional woman would be at a loss with such a man. There will only be a few subjects, if at all, that she could totally discuss with him. If she does have an in-depth intellectual discussion with this man, it would be almost pointless as she definitely has more knowledge than he does. For instance, there was an acquaintance who had a Ph.D. in Psychology and had a high powered career. She went with a welder who had a 10th grade education. She was very cultured and sophiscated. She was multilingual and travelled the world. She had interests which was beyond the purview of the welder.

To put it more succinctly, the relationship would be classified as a no-go from the very start. This acquaintance came from a racial background which inculcated her that there are few available educated men in her racial category. She was told to only date men from her same racial category even if he is lesser educated and has a nonprofessional job. In other words, she was told that any man is better than no man at all.

So she adhered to such advice at her own peril. She was interested in attending plays and lectures while he was only interested in going to bars and drinking to oblivion. He never read a book in his life and disdained any form of intellectual stimulation. If he did not attend bars, he relaxed by watching television. He was not interested in exploring the world. He was just content as he is. Each time they had a conversation, it always resulted in arguments because he could not comprehend what she was discussing.

Their circle of friends were also different. The acquaintance stated that when she was around his friends, all they talked about was wrestling and related things. She indicated to her friends that she was totally out of place with his friends. This relationship was totally on rocky waters so to speak.It was totally oblivious that there was no commonality in that relationship. .

In terms of career presentation and corporate image, a college educated and/or postgraduate professional woman is often viewed negatvely by her colleagues and superiors if she decides to bring her noncollege educated and/or blue collar boyfriend, husband, and/or significant other to office gatherings whether it is an office party and/or related office event. Remember the old adage that a person is known by the company he/she keeps. In other words, one's relationships are adequate reflections of that person.

Such a man evidently is unable to hold a conversation with her professional colleagues and superiors. This mere act on the part of the noncollege educated and/or blue collar man is observed by these same colleagues and superiors. Oftentimes, how one conducts oneself in corporate gatherings is considered regarding career related matters such as promotions. Besides the job implications regarding such associations, colleagues and superiors wonder why does such an intelligent woman is going with such a man. Colleagues and superiors wonder she could do better so why did she settle for him? The question asked is she so desperate for a man, does she have low self-esteem, or what? Sometimes, people further wonder something must be inherently wrong with her as it seems that no highly educated professional man wants her.

Of course, socioeconomically, this woman is behind the eight ball. Since she makes more than he does, she is, in essence, the breadwinner in the family. She can never relax socioeconomically as his job situation is more precarious than hers. Men who are noncollege educated often have low end menial jobs. Those jobs are usually dead end with no prospects of advancement. Blue collar men also earn less than their college educated mates. The former's job status is also perilous because of the increased automation and/or computerization of their jobs. Jobs for noncollege educated and/or blue collar men are becoming fewer and fewer in this postindustrialized era.

As a result of less jobs for the noncollege educated and/or blue collar man, he will most likely be unemployed for a large part of his life. This means that his college educated and/or postgraduate professional mate has to foot most of the financial bills. In essence, she is carrying him financially instead of being on an equal financial par in the relationship. This unequal financial parity causes the noncollege educated and/or blue collar men to feel that he is inferior to his college educated and/or postgraduate professional mate because subconsiously he knows that he will never be in her socioeconomic league.

If this couple has children, those children will receive conflicting messages from the parents involved. While the college educated and/or postgraduate professional woman espouses education and intellectual achievement, her noncollege educated and/or blue collar significant other will be totally unconcerned with thie issue of education. They will have divergent attitudes in other areas of life.

While the college and/or postgraduate educated professional woman teaches the child to be open minded and embrace a myriad of cultures, the noncollege educated and/or blue collar spouse will only espouse a much more narrower view of life. Noncollege educated and/or blue collar people are oftentimes more authoritarian regarding their parenting methodology than those who are college and better educated. This authenticates why noncollege educated and blue collar people value strict and unquestioning obedience in their children while college and better educated people value independent thinking and judgement in their children. Noncollege educated and/or blue collar people also use harsher and more negative punitive methods such as corporal punishments and yelling to discipline their children whereas college and better educated people explain things more to their children and use constructive discipline.

College and/or postgraduate educated professional woman do not have a confidant to turn to regarding discussing their problems. The average noncollege educated and/or blue collar men does not comprehend what problems she is encountering from day to day. He contends that because she is more educated than he is, she is not really experiencing any major problems. He believes that if she experienced the problems he was experiencing, now that would be a problem worth discussing. Also, the noncollege educated and/or blue collar man is often not in his significant other's corner when she has a career revelation, promotion, and/or a career epiphany. He also does not understand her need to advance herself educationally, careerwise, and/or intellectually as he is content to stay within his educational and job purview.

Many times the noncollege educated and/or blue collar men is jealous of his more educated and successful significant other because he believes that as a man, he should be calling the shots. He feels quite usurped by her both educationally, intellectually, and socioeconomically. That is quite a blow to his male ego and he cannot tolerate this whatever! Oftentimes, many noncollege educated and/or blue collar men sabotage their more educated and successful significant others either overtly and/or covertly. Sometimes this sabotage include physical abuse. In this man's estimation, he is going to be the man no matter what it takes. He is clearly uncomfortable with the fact that a woman is doing much better than he is.

A college and/or postgraduate educated professional woman who settles for a noncollege educated and/or blue collar man is going to have a poorer quality of life socioeconomically and intellectually than if she went with a man from a similar background. Noncollege educated and/or blue collar men cannot adequate provide for her because he is often socioeconomically subpar to her. Because of his socioeconomical subparity, she often must assume the dominant economic role in the relationship. Intellectually, they have divergent interests which makes it extremely difficult to for them to hold an intelligent conversation with each other. In essence, the prospects of a college educated and/or postgraduate professional woman having a semblance of a relationship with a noncollege educated and/or blue collar men is quite dismal to say the least.

In conclusion, people want other people who they have a commonality with whether it is educational, intellectual, and/or socioeconomic. People are the most comfortable with those who have similar backgrounds to theirs. This is why college and/or postgraduate educated professional women should only date and/or enter into relationships with men who are also college and/or postgraduate educated and professional. In those types of relationships, they have an educational, intellectual, and a socioeconomic commonality.

Conversely, it is quite unwise for a college and/or postgraduate educated professional woman to date and/or enter into a relationship with a noncollege educated and/or blue collar man. First of all, they have absolutely nothing in common as regards to educational, intellectual, and socioeconomic status. These differences are so divergent that each party will never agree upon anything nor come to an intelligent conclusion. In other words, college and.or postgraduated educated, professional women who enter into relationships with noncollege educated and/or blue collar men are only doing themselves a grave disservice. Women want men who are their educational, intellectual, and socioeconomic equal and/or better. No women should settle for less than that-ever!






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Comments 24 comments

Sooner28 4 years ago

"What these women fail to consider that they absolutely have little or nothing in common with such a man. Noncollege educated men usually have lower paying menial jobs that do not equal to that of her job either professionally and/or socioeconomically. Many a college and/or postgraduate educated professional woman often earns more than a noncollege educated man."

I guess education makes some people better than others? Or that money is the source of all happiness? I have college education. Are you seriously suggesting I should not be with someone who I care about and enjoy being with if she doesn't have a college degree? This is a really strange, and extremely snobbish hub.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To Sonner28: No, it is realistic hub. If a college educated woman wants to have a dismal and colorless life, by all means go with a noncollege educated man.

In such a relationship, she will not have stimulating conversation but only monosyllabic conversation as this type of man is neither educationally nor intellectually prodigious. Her socioeconomic life will be precarious. Such a man has a menial job if that and she will have to carry more than her weight in such a relationship.

If you want a man whose idea of an evening out is going to McDonalds and maybe a movie, by all means, go with a noncollege educated man! However, if a woman wants a good life- go with an educated man who is an intelligent conversationalist, have a very good job, and do more than just going to McDonalds and a movie! Yes, college educated people should only go with college educated people. It is only commonsense to do so.


Attikos profile image

Attikos 4 years ago from East Cackalacky

Such blatant snobbery can't be meant to be taken seriously. This is a facetious Hub.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To Attikos: This is not snobbery. I really mean this and this hub is not facetious. This is an undeniable fact of life, thank you kindly!


Attikos profile image

Attikos 4 years ago from East Cackalacky

Undeniable fact of life, is it? That clinches the matter.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To Attikos: This is indeed an undeniable fact of life. College and/or postgraduate educated professional women should only have relationships with men of a similar and/or better background. It is the intelligent thing to do and that it what correct thinking college educated professional women do.

Any college educated professional woman who goes with a noncollege educated, nonprofessional,and/or blue collar men clearly has self-esteem issues. Obviously, they have nothing in common neither intellectually, educationally, nor socioeconomically.

He will always earn less and he will never advance as fas as she. He also has fewer interest than she because of his lower education. This translates into the college educated woman not having an intelligent conversation with this man. Such a conversation is far beyond the purview of this man.

In essence, their respective lifestyle will be discordant to say the least. In other words, if a college educated professional woman goes with a noncollege educated man, her existence will be quite mediocre and bland so to speak. To put it succinctly, why settle for beef jerkie while you can have the choicest filet mignon!


Sooner28 4 years ago

You equate intelligence with a college degree. Our great economists told us everything was fine before the economy collapsed. Look at how turned out :P.

There are plenty of intelligent folk without a college degree. I just can't believe you would be proposing such a discriminatory point of view.

Ben Franklin was self-educated. I guess he would be excluded based on your criterion! Here is a large list of autodidacts. http://www.autodidactic.com/profiles/profiles.htm

Abraham Lincoln was also self-educated. http://www.lib.niu.edu/1995/ihy950229.html


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To Sooner28: Ben Franklin and Abraham Lincoln was from a different and earlier era. Most people in that era were noncollege educated. In fact, high school education during those eras was a rarity.

I am talking about this postmodern era. Most people are college educated and undereducated people are becoming fewer and fewer. The good jobs are going to people with college educations. People who are undereducated are not getting the good jobs period.

College education is equivalent to intelligence. Today, if one is to be deemed intelligent, one obtains tertiary education. Education is a necessary in this postmodern and postindustrialized era. College makes one more broadminded and logical as one is exposed to various facets which the noncollege educated person is not exposed to.

College education makes one appreciate the better cultural and intellectual things in life. College educated people are not as narrown and authoritarian as those who do not attend college. People who attend college and/or postgraduate school read more than those who did not attend college.

If you observe noncollege educated and/or blue collar people, you notice that there is a lack of intelligent conversation among those people. They have no concept of culture and intellectual things. They are just content to be the way they are. In other words, they have quite a tunnel vision-anything other than their purview is sorely discounted and ignored! The college educated woman is only condemning herself to a lesser life in all facets if she unwisely elects to have a relationship with a noncollege educated man. Her loss!


Helena Ricketts profile image

Helena Ricketts 4 years ago from Indiana

This hub is genius. A controversial subject matter loaded with key word placement that would obviously push buttons to receive comments and repeated views. Although I think the subject matter portrays us as being shallow, self centered individuals and is completely untrue for most women, I say hats off to you gmwilliams because this was a brilliant hub.

I do have to disagree with your view though. It's opinion presented as fact which will inevitably get a rise out of a lot of people here. It will be a fun one to watch!


Attikos profile image

Attikos 4 years ago from East Cackalacky

All right, I'm going to make a real effort to take this more seriously. Forgive my ridicule. I really thought the old social bigotry against "marrying beneath your station" had contracted a terminal disease eighty years ago and finally died with the boomer generation. I have to admit I'm taken a bit aback at finding it alive and well, at least in some circles.

Please accept my apology. It isn't nice to make fun of someone's obviously sincere views. That the principle has been translated for a self-declared meritocracy's need to reinforce its delusory feelings of superiority makes no difference to the etiquette of the matter.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

@Attikos: It is good to add to the discussion. This is what being an American is all about!


Attikos profile image

Attikos 4 years ago from East Cackalacky

It's my pleasure, believe me.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

Helena: This hub is definitely striking nerves. I have never seen one hub having so many hits in such a few days. I wrote this hub from the heart for I have seen too many highly educated, professional women enter into relationships with undereducated, nonprofessional and/or blue collar men only to suffer in silence or leave the relationship when a more desirable men of similar educational and career status came along!


Helena Ricketts profile image

Helena Ricketts 4 years ago from Indiana

@gmwilliams I knew it would when I read it. Controversy strikes up conversation every time. It's a basic marketing tactic that a lot of people have utilized to gain traffic and that's what you are seeing here. It hits people's emotional buttons. I don't use it even though I know about it because I don't think it's a good way to acquire and retain a following online. Not to mention it sparks anger which isn't an emotion that I like to bring out in my readers because it isn't healthy.

It's not so much what you are saying, it's the manner in which it's being said. It's opinion present as fact which a lot of people will view as they are being lied to and that's makes them angry.

As a college educated woman who is married to a career Army man that about to retire and "only" has a high school education, I have to respectfully disagree with your opinion on this subject.

I think it has more to do with values that are instilled into someone as a child. I have been taught to look at the entire individual, not just their bank account. My marriage is strong and a complete contradiction to the opinion that is presented in this hub. Everyone is entitled to their opinions and the life consequences that come with them. That is the natural law of things.

You can argue that what you have presented is fact until, as my grandmother would say, the cows come home. Unfortunately when the person you are trying to convince is wrapped up in the emotion of anger that you created, you'll get absolutely nowhere with your point of view and the reasoning behind it with them. That's basic human psychology and you are seeing it right here in your comments.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

Thank you Helena for stopping by and adding to the discussion!


youngmom1986 profile image

youngmom1986 4 years ago from Arkansas

I am a college student, studying to be a doctor. I am married to a man who graduate high school but has no need for college as his goal in life is to be a police officer. We have three very intelligent children who benefit from him being their father because of his personality, not his education. He is soft spoken and compassionate towards them and I don't think education has to do with finding a mate. Personality and common goals for the future and for life in general can make the two unlikeness of people become a great couple.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

No. I do not write for clicks. This hub is heartfelt.

I have observed professional, college educated women in relationships with nonprofesssional, noncollege educated and/or blue collar men with quite disastrous results. Many of these women are acquaitances and relatives.

Their interests are vastly different from that of the nonprofessional, noncollege educated, and/or blue collar significant other. While the former loves theatre, museums, and other higher cultural pursuits, the latter is only interested in participating in mundane activities so to speak.

They relay to me how they are somewhat the breadwinners in their household as they earn more than the latter. They also tell me how other professional colleagues and friends look down on them because they are with these men. In essence, women want men that they can look up, not down at! The purpose of a college education is to have a better life socioeconomically and intellectually, thank you!


EmpressFelicity profile image

EmpressFelicity 4 years ago from Kent, England, UK

"She was interested in attending plays and lectures while he was only interested in going to bars and drinking to oblivion. He never read a book in his life and disdained any form of intellectual stimulation. If he did not attend bars, he relaxed by watching television. He was not interested in exploring the world."

Blimey, generalise much?

You can't simply assume that every non-graduate is a barfly who is only interested in football, beer and reality TV. That's grossly insulting. Many men (and women) who don't go to college are highly intelligent - they don't go to college because (a) they can't afford college, or (b) they just don't want to go, or (c) they have a more hands-on bent that is better served by learning a practical skill or trade rather than spending three years getting into debt doing a sociology degree.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To EmpressFelicity: I knowest of what I speak. I have a wide circle of family, friends, and associates with college degrees and professional jobs. Some of these dear women were in relationships with undereducated, nonprofessional and/or blue collar men with often negative results.

These women portend that they could not have a deep and intellectual discourse with their significant others whether the latter were boyfriends, lovers, and/or husbands. They also indicated that their interests were so widely divergent.

A few of them added that reading a good book was quite foreign to such men. I was not denigrating the undereducated, nonprofessional man at all, I was only stating the facts.

Many people are very afraid of the truth and that is why this hub is deemed "controversial". However, it is not.

I remember discussing this situation with a highly placed coworker. She told me that a college and/or postgraduate educated, professional woman SHOULD NEVER enter into a relationship with an undereducated, nonprofessional men because it will be at her peril.

I really do not know why people are upset at this! Isn't this common knowledge. I know it is among my circle. Oh well, off to writing another hub! Oh the travails of a writer.


hidden sexism 4 years ago

This hub is quite sexist in my opinion. Why does a woman need a man she can "look up to" intelligence wise? Why is it desirable for the female to be of lesser intelligence than the male in a relationship, but not the other way around? I actually agree with the premise that people of similar education make better partners in life, but I think this emphasis on women marrying up is depressingly sexist.

First of all, it supposes that there is an inexhaustible supply of men who are intellectually superior to the women who seek out such mates. This subtly implies that the author thinks men are inherently more intelligent than women.

But in my experience, I have found women of varying education levels to be, on the whole, smarter than men of similar education levels. In my Ph.D. program, my male colleagues were not as clever, resourceful, or creative as their female counterparts. They were not as adept at reading social cues, and generally they just did not shine as brightly.

If you look at college enrollment stats, most college undergraduates today are women, and in graduate school womens enrollment is also creeping upward. Sooner or later there won't be enough educated men to go around for all the educated women. Some women will have to "settle" for someone with less education, unless they are lesbians or want to be single.

Could it possible be that, on the whole, women are just as smart, if not smarter than men? If we accept this shocking hypothesis, how can every woman find her intellectual equal or superior????????


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To hidden sexism: I am taking about an equal parity regarding relationships. That is all. Couples with the same and/or similar educational, intellectual, and/or socioeconomic backgrounds usually have more harmonious relationships with each other than couples who have different and/or divergent educational, intellectual, and/or socioeconomic backgrounds. You are an astute woman, thank you for your comments. They definitely add to the discussion.


Mark 4 years ago

gmwilliamns said: "I am taking about an equal parity regarding relationships. That is all. Couples with the same and/or similar educational, intellectual, and/or socioeconomic backgrounds"

But women rarely seek their equals. Women generally seek men of greater economic means. Education is not even on par, as women generally look for men with more valuable degrees than their own. A graduate degree in physics is not equal to a graduate degree in social work. The time both parties spent in college is the only thing equal about those two degrees. Thankfully, men are not as picky. If they were, women would be on their own. What's even more interesting is that when men outnumbered women in college, they were still willing to marry uneducated women. The equal parity argument did not become an issue until women graduates were more common. Less than a century ago, marriages not only lasted for a long time, but there was more of a socioeconomic and academic imbalance between spouses.

Out of curiosity, what was your major? It obviously wasn't anything invloving mathematics, because a math major would understand that since women outnumber men in college, it is mathematically impossible for all educated women to marry educated men. Even dating outside one's race or emigrating will not help, as almost all nations are experiencing this imbalance.

Men and women are in for a bumpy ride. Looks like this social experiment known as feminism was not such a hot idea after all.


EmpressFelicity profile image

EmpressFelicity 4 years ago from Kent, England, UK

@gmwilliams: "Of course, there are prodigious people who did not attend college but are quite inventive and creative peoople. Many have their own jobs and enterprises. Some are even entertainers. These are not the people I am talking about."

You didn't exactly make that clear in your hub though, did you?

What's that creaking noise I hear? I know - it's the sound of moving goalposts!


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

But I thought that all knew this. Of course, there are varied types of people who do not have college educations as there are people who have college educations. There are people who attend college because they are interested in learning and advancing themselves. Others attend college just to get a good job. Few attend college because it is family tradition and/or that is what their parents wanted them to do and they are just reluctantly following their parents' wishes. Yet, many others attend college because they frankly do not know what they should do at this point and rather to work until they are certain of what they should do, they just go to college to take up space. That is common knowledge and self-explanatory!

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