Why do some people have a hard time expressing their true feelings?
Friendship or Relationship?
Friendship it truly a good thing, without friends we wouldn't have any one to blow off to and tell all of our problems and keep all of our secrets. Some people only have a few select friends while other people feel the need to befriend an extensive group of people. I am the few friends type, I know a lot of people whom I am cordial with when I work with them, go to school with them, or see them in public. I have never felt the need to have a large amount of friends, it must have something to do with my very strong sense of self reliance and not wanting to burden other people with my problems. On the other hand, my daughter who passed away last year at the age of twenty-five, had a multitude of friends from all different backgrounds, and classes. She would do any thing for anyone.
The one question that sometimes comes up is can men and women be friends. I believe revious paragraph talked about friendship which is a type of relationship, but there are so may other types, one being boyfriend and girlfriend. How do you know when it has gone from a regular friendship to something more such as a boyfriend girlfriend type of relationship. That is where the line becomes scuedfor many couples. Unless there is adequate communication between the two parties so they know that they are on the same page, the ideas of the two parties involved may be quite different. Even if there is reasonable communication one person may change their mind depending on the mood, what they are feeling for the day, or if for some reason they don't want other people to know.
they can, without crossing the line in to something that seems like a relationship.
Underlying messages and evasive answers.
Back to the question at hand why to people have a hard time expressing their true feelings? The reason I ask this question is of the situation that I currently find myself in. I have a male friend that I have know for twenty some years we met when I was late teens early twenties and he was five years older than I was. At that time he had plans for himself and wasn't getting married until he was thirty needless to say I didn't wait around for him to decided what he really wanted to I made my own life. He on the other hand made a horrible decision in the person he choose to marry, she was the one that was around when he was thirty and wanted to get married to fit his life plan. While he was married he found out I broke up with my then boyfriend and began tracking me down, wanting to be with me and to sleep with me. I politely reminded him that he was married and I was not going to be the one to break apart his marriage. Needless to say that he never stopped trying to be with me. I then got married to another man, and needless to say my friends marriage broke up, at least it wasn't my fault. Over the past few years we have crossed each others paths at least five times if not more. We were always cordial to each other, after all we didn't part company on bad terms. Then last year my now ex-husband and I split up, due to my his alcohol abuse, and his not wanting to get help for his problem. Before my ex actually left for the fair state of Georgia to be with his mother, I had run into my long time friend at a craft and food festival in our town. My friend had asked how married life was and I told him the truth. We exchanged numbers and began to talk to each other, I never crossed the line because my husband was still living in my home and had not departed for GA yet. Once my husband left my friend and I started to rekindle old flames once again. I however have a never busy schedule, being a college student, working at bank part-time, an raising a three year old on my own. My life to say the least is very busy and very hectic, all of which my friend was aware of, even though he knew this, he whines would whine about not being able to have time for me. When I had questioned what he wanted from me he stated he wasn't ready for a relationship, and maybe we should not talk for a few weeks, I told him I didn't have time for games and that he should have a nice life and told him goodbye. To that his reply was that is not what I want, he says I like you, like being with you and like talking to you. I told him I was not into games. Over the next few months we spent a few nights together, and have talked to and texted each other quite a bit. He always telling me he wants more time, and wants to spend more nights with me. Here is the kicker he still says he is not ready for a relationship and he loves me as a person. The one time we talked he said he didn't want his kids to know he has a girlfriend. Now I am confused am I just a booty call that he wants every night, or am I his girlfriend. I mean we don't go out together, and do anything, mostly because of our conflicting schedules, but he would rather spend every weekend with his daughters than a little time with me. I feel like I am the one who gives the most and I am quite frankly tired of giving. I mean we can still be friends, but he needs to either come clean with his kids and let them know he wants to be with me, or stop bugging me about being with me and just accept that we are just friends. After all he had suggested that we move in the same house together, as room mates so his kids wouldn't know, but how long would the two of us sleeping in separate rooms last, when he is around he can't keep his hands off me.
This is why I wish people would express their true feelings. His body language and some of his conversations give off every indication he wants to be with me, but then out of the blue, he says he's not ready for a relationship right now. Give me a break!!!