Wishes, Confessions, and Regrets of a Less-Than-Average Guy

A perfect specimen of a man

Men are the absolute world’s worst when it comes to confessing a weakness in their lives or an area where they are not as strong as other men.

Women are not squeamish about confiding their (few) failings with their BFF’s over a quiet lunch of mineral water and a crisp, fresh salad.

I am not so foolish as to try and explain why men and women differ in this area of personal confessions. I can only assume that this is how they are wired.

A guy with the perfect body

Michael Phelps, natural winner

Chris Evans, actor, loved and admired by all pretty girls

This guy is so confident that he can't help but look arrogant

Bo Jackson star of two sports, professional football and baseball

Do I look great or what?

Blake Griffin, natural superstar

Jamis Winston, the talk of college football

Now it’s my turn. I am not the least bit ashamed to “air out” my many weaknesses and personal flaws. Why should I? I am not going to my grave by telling you the truth.

So here is a list of personal things that I have never shared with you entitled:

“Wishes, Confessions, and Regrets of a Less-Than-Average Guy”

Five Wishes

  • I wish that I were so good looking that when I walk by a pretty girl she faints on the spot. And awakens crazy in-love with “a” Greek god who passed her two hours ago and she will pay dearly in cash for a professional private eye to find me.
  • I wish that “my” style of dancing with a gorgeous lady would simply be to remain sitting at our table and moving my pinkie finger back and forth in perfect rhythm with the band.
  • I wish that even when I make an error, my entourage of beautiful girls would argue that my error was only my imagination.
  • I wish that I would only have to move my left eyebrow to attract a gang of lovely women.
  • I wish that “if” I were to have a bad photo, it would make pretty girls burn Justin Beiber’s best photos on the public square.

Five Confessions

  • I confess that I have always longed to not only turn a pretty girl’s head, but her entire body.
  • I confess that I wish God had given me the looks of the late James Garner.
  • I confess I had been born as Joe Namath.
  • I confess that I had yearned to have the perfect body with no time spent in the gym, special diets, or daily regiments of tough exercise.
  • I confess that I have always wanted to be the stellar athlete—no matter the sport, I was a natural.

Five Regrets

  • I regret not taking more tough subjects in high school.
  • I regret living my life to please others.
  • I regret not being more mentally-tough and telling the “uppity” people around me to simply “take a hike.”
  • I regret not following my dreams even though they were not what my friends were shooting for.
  • I regret not being more sensitive to those like me who came across my life and then left.

One more . . .

I regret you spending ten to fifteen-minutes reading this story when you could have been outside spraying for fire ants or those pesky rag weeds growing in your front yard.

"Thank You for

stopping by. It is

always

my pleasure to

see you.

Kenneth"

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Comments 18 comments

Kiss andTales profile image

Kiss andTales 2 years ago

Wishes and confessions and regrets is a wonderful hub of good lessons, you are a great thinker ,you think many things out,and you are not one sided,you are able to see your self on both sides of the coin as example, that is even if you are not the benefactor!

What I have come to like about you is your sincerity of truth, most of hubs are great because of that being great in you.

Another thing is that when people can not express how they feel you do that for them

A great gift in you God has blessed. So far I have not been disappointed in your writings and I know I can see your name and be glad you are there.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dearest KissandTales,

I am so moved by your sweet comment that I do not know what to say. "Thank You, DEAR FRIEND, for having such a pure heart and spirit." "I mean it." "I was thinking about you today as a matter of fact and boom! There you are!"

"You have made my day and not just his day, but a LOT of days."

"Please come back to see me often."


sheilamyers 2 years ago

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm glad none of your wishes came true. If they would have, you may not have turned out to be the great guy you are today. I can imagine men like that being the egoists who turn me off because they think they can have anything they want.

As for your regrets - there's only one you can't change and that's because you can't have a "do over" for school. From reading your hubs, I think you probably now do the opposite of what you listed. Sure, you can't go back and treat some of those people any differently so you don't have the regrets, but you can move forward, which I think you have.

Wishes, confessions, and regrets have made you who you are today and I think you're a great guy now and hope you never change.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

My Dearest Sheila,

(Did my salutation say how I feel about you too?)

Thank you, Sheila, so very much for this very-enlightening comment. No one has ever said these things to me. Honest.

And sheila, I feel the same about you--you are a great girl who always adds to my days, not subtracts.

I hope in some way that I can do something to pay you back for such a sweet comment.


Abby Campbell profile image

Abby Campbell 2 years ago from Charlotte, North Carolina

Oh my! Ken, when I saw the steroid-filled bodybuilder on your spotlight, I was already laughing. You crack me up so much, and I thank you. It's the end of the day, and I truly enjoyed your hub here. As I read down to the 5 regrets, I was thinking "Ah, he's got a serious side." Then I get to the next sentence, and you made my tear up with laughter again. You are the BEST!


sripoonam profile image

sripoonam 2 years ago

We all have wishes, regrets and confessions to make , it takes a lot of guts to claim that , superlikes :*


sheilamyers 2 years ago

Kenneth: You don't have to try very hard to "pay me back" because it isn't necessary. You always have nice things to say in your responses and comments you leave at my hubs.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

My Dear sheilamyers,

I am going to say, "thank you, sweet friend," first for the lovely and comforting comments and now, do not take this the wrong way. YOU and Those on My Followers List have to be Gifts of God because NOT ONE, including you, has ever left me a harsh word or profane comment.

And I appreciate that so much.

I just meant that I wish I had the finances or means to send YOU and My Followers a check for $100,000.00 to spend as you wish.

Love you, Dear Sheila.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

sripoonam,

Thank you so much for your sweet comment. It doesn't bother me to confess my numerous faults and flaws.

I thought it would make me a stronger person. And even if it doesn't, I haven't hurt anyone.

Love you for your support.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Abby!

My dear friend, thank you from my heart, for your very-delightful comment. Yes, I do in fact, have a serious side:

Confession: I do appreciate spiders. I never bother them and they never bother me.

I appreciate your taking time at the end of your day to read my materials instead of taking a good nap.

Honest. Come back anytime.


ananceleste profile image

ananceleste 2 years ago from California

This is charming, to say the least. I learned the hard way that we only regret the things that we don't do, or the things that go unsaid. As a writer, you won the second half of that equation. Live each day without regret, every thing we do teaches us something. No time is ever wasted. Just make sure that you never leave anything for tomorrow. Today is all you have. Don't let the day go by without telling those around you how important they are; so death can't take that from you. Like Chuck Palahnink said; " We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will"

PS;

Beauty is fleeting like the seasons. Essence survives the winter.


vkwok profile image

vkwok 2 years ago from Hawaii

Thanks for sharing this food for thought. It really got the gears in my head turning.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

My Dearest ananceleste,

Thank you so very much, not just for reading my heartfelt hub, but for the spiritual-mentoring you did for me in your comment.

Wow. I appreciate it so much. I am so grateful to you for being a Special Person, Friend, Follower and a "tamer of the pen," when it comes to writing.

I wish I could recall the late Dr. Hunter S Thompson's motto for life. I will find it and go to your email on your Profile page and send it to you.

I understand what you are saying and I not only appreciate it, but agree with you to "leave it all on the field," as they say in sports areanas.

You are a true light I see in the blurred fog I have right now in my life. Thank you. I shall NEVER forget you.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, vkwok,

You are very welcome for the laugh you got from this. Your laughing makes me happy. God bless you my friend with peace of mind and complete happiness.


Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 2 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Great hub and very thought provoking. Lots of things I could agree with like taking tougher subjects or being more serious in high school. Thanks for sharing.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, sweet Gypsy Rose Lee,

Thank you, dear friend, for your sweet words. I guess if I had thought that could have passed, I would have taken those tough courses, but still, I was not financially-able to attend college.

You are welcome for the sharing, but it was my pleasure.

Happy Labor Day.


Tonipet profile image

Tonipet 2 years ago from The City of Generals

Hello Kenneth!, First, thanks for the wonderful message:-D...

This is a great hub -- you're right, it's not going to offer you any less confessing what's inside you. Wishes, Confessions, and Regrets of a Less-Than-Average Guy -- is one hub telling the world what is takes to be a real man. You've taught us a lot. Many of us may even have realized the many times we've been insensitive to others too, when we could've at least shared a piece of joy.

Well, I guess my knees are sturdy enough not to faint when Capt. America stops in front of me -- but not when Superman flies me to the stars! Lol kidding! Hope I made you smile.

Thanks again, Kenneth... allow me to be your new fan... following you back! Keep up and I salute the man in you. -Tonette


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear Tonette,

Wow! I have never, I mean never, in my almost four years of being a hubber, received such a sweet message as yours. I am sincere. Thank you so much for taking time to read this hub and for your heartfelt words.

Sure you can be my fan, I love it. And I am already a fan of yours and your lovely name. Was it okay to say that?

You did give me a smile with the Superman and Capt. America references. I like these guys too. I had lunch with them just last week. LOL.

No, Tonette. I salute you, the talented, good-hearted, and sweet lady that you are. God bless your life in every way.

Your Friend for Life,

Kenneth

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