If you are structured you are an on time person, do not like to be late, like a clean house and like order. he sounds like a person who is the opposite of you. If un-resolved this could lead to issues in your relationship.
However if he does not wish to be a part of planning you may be asking too much. Don't show him ten types of flowers, narrow it down to two and they will choose. Men do not like to have to have lots of choices, and the moment he does not pick the one you really like you get mad.
Give him simple choices and let hem decide and you stick to it. He will not want to decide every thing so you do that, he will not care. Let him pick the tux, the food, two at a time, not in the same day. And Lets play a game, like if you were deciding the menu for the wedding, ask the question when cooking , say would you like Chicken, or Beef tonight, ( and really be cooking ) what ever he decides will be your choice for the wedding. He was involved but he did not have to interupt his mental to make a decision. In other words some men think this is girly stuff you should do with your girls and your mom, he could care less, but it means something to you so you have to get your answers by going in the back door. I hope this helps