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When is a hug more than a hug between a man and a woman who is NOT his wife?


If a man hugs a woman in front of his wife, where is the line that it has gone too far? The "hug" is fine. Does it cross the line with a kiss on the cheek? A kiss on the neck? Prolonged hugging? A kiss on the mouth? Does it just depend on the woman or on the situation or is it ALWAYS over the line when more than a hug?

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I Am Rosa profile image87

Best Answer Rosa Marchisella (I Am Rosa) says

5 years ago
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  • aliasis profile image

    aliasis 3 years ago

    Wait, men and women aren't allowed to hug as friends? I don't think that's a rule at all! Especially young people these days happily hug their opposite-sex friends, or kiss on the cheeks. And a quick closed-mouth kiss is not "mate only" either...


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William E Krill Jr (krillco) says

4 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 4 years ago

    That's actually the smartest move! That does make you a gentleman AND a caring man! Thanks for responding!

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Jeffrey Maskel (jeffreymaskel) says

3 years ago
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  • Juno Smith 16 months ago

    great comprehensive short answer, thanks.


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Thief12 profile image91

Thief12 says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    The point in question is more the kiss on the neck than a mere hug. Analyzing began with that being more of the focus. This was in fact my point; there are many different conceptions and misconceptions regarding what is appropriate. Good point!


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TIMETRAVELER2 profile image93

TIMETRAVELER2 says

5 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    Time Traveled, TRUE story! LOL...it is a touchy subject! Thanks for commenting!

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DSmizzle says

2 years ago
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Michael (the50marathons17) says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    I like the two second rule! It gives room for some affection, but closes the gap on overstepping the intimacy boundaries! Great idea!

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IslandBites says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    Thanks for replying! I think it IS often a cultural thing! I wondered about a gauge on the level of intimacy insinuated by the actions. I am a hugger, but very i am very conscious of the intimacy level of what KIND of hug is used on each person.


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Naveed Ahmed (Naveed Ahmed 624) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Thanks for commenting.

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Dr Neil S Hall (Neil S Hall) says

22 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    I agree! Thanks for commenting!

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hawkdad73 says

5 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    I agree that a quick hug is definitely different than a prolonged one! Thanks for commenting!

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Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) says

5 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    In addition, I would like to reply to another comment within this overall thread. No. I do not cheat, have not ever and will not cheat. I personally do not condone sex outside of marriage and intimate touches belong at home with your spouse.


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OSBERT JOEL C (goodnews11) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    The western culture however, has gotten so "loose" that some feel no need for respectul boundaries. Thanks for commenting!


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Besarien says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Communication is a great factor in the interpretation and understanding in this situation. Thanks for commenting!

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Audrey Selig (brakel2) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Funny but my husband would FLIP if I even hugged an ex! He gets "grumbly" if I even chat with another man. He had no problem with the situation. People and circumstances make a world of difference.

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Brinafr3sh says

3 years ago
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Shankelis (shanice whitter) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    I agree...it is sad that some think it won't be noticed. It is always noticed.

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philli says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    agreed! Thanks for commenting!

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Robert Morgan (the rawspirit) says

17 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 17 months ago

    Bobby, the key to it all is, in fact, knowing your mate and protecting that relationship. Thanks for commenting!


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Dana (Dana Lovrek) says

22 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    You are SO on target! The situation, the degree of intimacy, the culture, the spouse are all reasons to keep it "in check" and make sure to keep the communication clear. Thanks for commenting!

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Don Colfax (tehgyb) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    tehgyb,

    I agree..anything beyond a hug between a married man and another woman is inappropriate and a brief hug at that. I think it's an issue of respect and shows the value one places on the relationship with their spouse. Thanks for responding!

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EvanCat says

21 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 21 months ago

    So true. Thanks for commenting!

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kkuma01 says

5 years ago
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Martin VK says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    You are right....generalzations do not work here. However a good rule of thumb is to keep the emotions in consideration! Thanks for commenting!

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Mr. Smith says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Exactly. Thanks for commenting!

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Mary (prettynutjob30) says

19 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 15 months ago

    I am that way as well! Thanks for reading and responding!

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Sckylar Gibby-Brown (S R Gibby-Brown) says

13 days ago
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LoriSoard says

5 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    LoriSoard, I totally agree...stay on that soap box! Marriage needs protecting!

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Disillusioned (C.V.Rajan) says

3 years ago
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Oztinato says

2 years ago
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Mara Alexander (MonkeyShine75) says

22 months ago
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Robert A. Avila, PE, MCE (Biomedical) says

21 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 21 months ago

    I agree. It would be easy for imagination to get carried away! Thanks for answering!

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Mark Peter (mark kenga) says

10 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 10 months ago

    Keeping open communication is vital in any relationship! Thanks for reading and commenting!

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realtalk247 says

8 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 8 months ago

    Respect is truly a key element in a relationship! Thanks for commenting!

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ketage says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    ketage, thanks for replying. I agree 100% that a hug and kiss on the neck or mouth is totally inappropriate for any person with whom you are not intimate. Wow! Croatia! How cool!

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Vieiragirl says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    I agree. The security of the marriage makes a difference. The kiss in question is on the neck. A simple, quick hug and a peck on the forehead of cheek could be okay given the closeness of the "friendship". A relative stranger..different story.

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Betty Janet Davis says

18 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 12 months ago

    It is true that most have learned the social norm for the level of appropriateness. Some have not learned, sad to say! Thanks for reading and responding!

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Janina Rivera (jdivirtual) says

16 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 16 months ago

    Wandering hand definitely qualify as overstepping the line. Thanks for responding!

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Patricia Scott (pstraubie48) says

2 years ago
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pamesex says

5 years ago
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Richard Davis (lostdogrwd) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    I agree. If one person feels bad, it does matter. Thanks for commenting!

61

Michael Doria says

2 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    So true! Michael, thanks for commenting!

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Jared L Rice says

2 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    I agree. Body language tells a lot about a person and their intent. Thanks for the insight!

60

Jardin La Fleur says

2 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    While providing a great answer, you also bring up questions that help clarify the question! Thanks for commenting!

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Globetrekkermel says

4 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    It is a tough one. The only problem about them going somewhere more private is he was married to someone else...it was in church next to his wife and he kissed the other woman's neck.

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Diane Minton (Diane Woodson) says

4 years ago
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  • IslandBites profile image

    IslandBites 3 years ago

    Please. Nonsense.


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Wacky Mummy says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    I agree...more than that does become questionable! Thanks for commenting!

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sprickita says

3 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    You are so right....a look CAN create that connection that can lead to too much! No one in particular....just a thought provoking question. Thanks for answering!

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Billy Taylor (moviesreviews) says

22 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    If it was only a hug....I can see it being totally harmless. I feel the kiss on the neck took it over the top. Again...situations are so the key. Thanks for commenting!

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Rachel Huttenstine (Reinventing Rach) says

22 months ago
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Amit Garai says

22 months ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 21 months ago

    It can become a "chip" played in a gamble between partners! Good point! Thanks for commenting!

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Stuart A Jeffery (janikon) says

20 months ago
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Tabassum Chowdhury (tabassum19) says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    I agree. To me a kiss on the neck is intimate and seductive. Thanks for responding!

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Sai Chaitanya (chaitanyasaivb) says

2 years ago
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  • IslandBites profile image

    IslandBites 2 years ago

    Generalizations. I am a woman and I don't mind when my husband hugs other women. And I obviously don't get hurt by that, neither my husband when I hug other men.


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Lisa Brown (lisasuniquevoice) says

3 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Thanks for commenting! Touching of shoulders is a safe boundary!

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juiwei2000 says

5 years ago
 |  Comment
  • Brinafr3sh profile image

    Brinafr3sh 3 years ago

    I agree, unless the male spouse don't mind his wife giving out hugs as well, in front of him.


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Devika Primić (DDE) says

3 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    Thanks for commenting! I agree...simple guidelines help us all! Family is one thing, but still within boundaries! Thanks for commenting!

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William Thompson (DiscoInferno) says

2 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    I believe it is the kiss that puts it over the top in my thoughts! Thanks for commenting!

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Stephanie Alexander (Aunyanka) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Stephanie, you are so right. Cultures play a significant part in the interpretation of appropriateness. I believe most though would agree that kissing the mouth and neck are an intimate move. Thanks for commenting!

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David (GizSleep) says

20 months ago
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passionatelearnr says

15 months ago
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  • Thief12 profile image

    Thief12 15 months ago

    And if I were to go with that premise, will hugging/not hugging change that?


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Thom (BirminghamVoice) says

15 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 15 months ago

    Agreed! It is possible to keep it appropriate! Thanks for reading and responding!

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Divakara (Divakar P) says

15 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 15 months ago

    Good points! Thanks for reading and responding!

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Oscar Jones (Oscarlites) says

12 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 12 months ago

    Many great points, but my favorite is the last...a wife's human nature needs only a good answer. Thanks for reading and responding!

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mts1098 says

4 months ago
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David Stillwell (davenmidtown) says

5 years ago
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Angela Marie (be grateful) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    be grateful, thanks for your comment! That is so true! Thanks for reading!

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CARIBQUEEN says

19 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 10 months ago

    It truly is different when in creates discomfort in your relationship. Thanks for reading and commenting!

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Shyron E Shenko says

16 months ago
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Elfkay Adeniran (funsoaregbesola) says

13 months ago
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  • IslandBites profile image

    IslandBites 13 months ago

    So, something that can be "the beginning of an amorous affair" should only be done when the wife is not there? LOL

    Btw, you're wrong. I'm a wife and I have no problem with my husband hugging another woman, even if she's not a close relative.

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Ashley Cogdill (Alexis Cogwell) says

9 months ago
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Belle Chanel says

3 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    I think the intimacy of touch is so powerful and so dangerous to a relationship when given to someone outside of that relationship. Good luck with yours!


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Satendra Saini (SatendraSaini) says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Absolutely. Thanks for commenting!

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Daniel Abram (MrDanielAbram) says

23 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Daniel, I agree. A quick hug between even practical strangers can be okay, but prolonging it opens up problems. Thanks for commenting!

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Vince (iggy7117) says

13 months ago
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edhan says

2 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    edhan, very good line of thought there! The whole idea was more of a wondering what people thought kind of thing. It is a springboard question for couples. Thanks for answering!

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Kratika Dubey (Kratika) says

21 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 21 months ago

    I agree. Thanks for commenting!

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Rachel L Alba says

19 months ago
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Chanson Intrepide says

5 months ago
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60

jenniterrystockto says

3 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    I am SO sorry you have experienced all of that. I believe we have slacked on the training of what IS acceptable. We have more divorce and immorality than ever before. A hug is fine. Kissing IS intimate. Respect in relationships WILL preserve them.


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61

Elisa Martin says

7 weeks ago
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K Thiruselvam (thiruselvamk) says

10 months ago
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60

Angelesq says

20 months ago
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  • frumpleton 4 months ago

    Maybe I am meaner than you are. You ever heard of fight fire with fire? Well, how about hugging and kissing one of HIS friends in front of him? I'll bet he won't like that, much.


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Vipin Behari Goyal (vipinbehari) says

18 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 12 months ago

    I find it interesting that precluding even a spouse from a determination of appropriateness of intimacy seems to be acceptable to you or anyone for that matter. Freedom for intimacy with anyone....does not define a committed marriage.


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Mian Mohsan says

18 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 12 months ago

    Christians would not condone it either. Lovers should reserve this level of intimacy for private as well. Thanks for reading and commenting.

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Ana Maria Orantes (erorantes) says

12 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 11 months ago

    Ana Maria,

    Thanks for reading and responding. It should be okay to give and receive hugs ALL the time. Sadly there is sometimes an "agenda" behind them! Cultural mores often play a large role in the interpretaion of the intent! Great comment

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Evane G (Evane) says

5 months ago
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RCAugust says

5 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 3 years ago

    RCAugust, thanks for answering! That is probably the best approach!

0

Joshtheplumber says

20 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 12 months ago

    It's true. The heart which cares does know. Thanks for reading and commenting!

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Ravi and Swastha (choosetolive) says

18 months ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 12 months ago

    Many cultures do accept many levels of "hugging", however, I find that respecting the relationship brings in its own level of appropriateness of any type of touch. Thanks for reading and commenting!

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roselinsojan says

8 months ago
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alaknath says

2 months ago
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Manjunath7472 says

7 months ago
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frumpleton says

4 months ago
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Shairy says

2 months ago
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Noey Lab (noeylab) says

4 weeks ago
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Deborah Sexton says

2 years ago
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  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    So true...we put ourselves in temptations path. Thanks for commenting!

0

ShujinkoDegus says

2 years ago
 |  Comment
  • prektjr.dc profile image

    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 2 years ago

    Agreed! Thanks for commenting!

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Jerry Wilfred says

2 months ago
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Pam Birchfield says

2 years ago
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Aditya Singh (adityasingh58) says

4 months ago
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Omar Eldamsheety says

7 weeks ago
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jerry carman (jerrycarman) says

10 months ago
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PADMENDRA S R (padmendra) says

2 years ago
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    Debbie Carey (prektjr.dc) 22 months ago

    Trust is a delicate thing. Hugging IS generally a safe sign of comfort or affection. Kissing can twist things to a new level. A man who loves his wife would never pull her into questioning whether or not he is trustworthy.

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Nudely says

4 months ago
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  • Elisa Martin 7 weeks ago

    Hi my name is Elisa Martins , i have been suspecting my husband of cheating on me for a while ,i have always wanted answers i tried hiring a couple of investigators and hackers not knowing who is real and who to trust.. which didnt really work till i

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