How can I tell if the girl is actually interested in me?

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  1. robes profile image59
    robesposted 11 years ago

    How can I tell if the girl is actually interested in me?

    I met a girl at college and we've been talking a ton. In fact when we went out for dinner we seriously talked and talked for over 3 hours. After all of the laughs and joy however, is when I don't really know what she is thinking. We do text/talk a lot but I'm always the one who has to say something first. Is that strange?

  2. Rosana Modugno profile image73
    Rosana Modugnoposted 11 years ago

    Just so you know, I never text or call a man I'm interested in first.  It's just part of my pride and the fact that I believe in old fashioned chivalry.  I like being chased.  She may be the same way, so don't ever take that personally.

    By the sounds of it, you hit it off at dinner, then it faded a bit?  If that's the case, it could be anything from schoolwork, personal life or disinterest.  The only way to know is talk to her.  Call her, ask her out again.

    If she says no, I'd say forget it.  If she says yes, you have your answer.

  3. profile image0
    jcheng16posted 11 years ago

    it's definitely not strange that you have to initiate conversation, a lot of times girls have the idea that if a guy really wants to talk to her he will. Otherwise she feels like she's just bothering him. In your case it sounds like you guys really had a spark which is great! The only way to know for sure is to take her out again. Maybe another dinner, because texting is great and everything but being able to see someone's facial expressions and body language can tell you a lot about it they're really interested or just trying to be nice. Also a key indicator would be if she even accepts another dinner, because if she wasn't interested she would be able to come up with some excuse to not go and not even suggest a reschedule. if a reschedule is suggested then there is still hope, and the best case scenario would be a simple yes. good luck !

  4. Li Galo profile image75
    Li Galoposted 11 years ago

    This sounds promising for you but before she puts you in the friends category, you better hurry up your game before another guy puts some moves on her!  Call her and ask her on an actual date.  Use the word "date" in your phone request.  You ask her when you will pick her up for the date and arrive on time.  Dress up a little for the occasion - just enough so she knows you made an effort (not a tux unless you're going to a formal ball).  Think Dockers, not jeans.  Think collared shirt, not t-shirt.  You show up for the date with a rose or bunch of flowers, you take her to the date location, and you pay for everything.  You hold open the doors for her while on the date, help her with her sweater or coat, etc.  You kiss her at some point or have a good night kiss at her door.  Now THAT'S a date. 

    Just hanging out and having dinner together is NOT a date.  Asking her just to dinner is too vague.  I go to dinner all the time with my guy friends and it means nothing... and yes, we laugh and hang out for 2-3 hours each time - but I date someone else and they are clear they are nothing more than friends to me!  Be clearer in your communication and you'll know where you stand with her.

    It takes a bit of guts to ask her out on a true date but it's better to know where this is going.  If she says she's dating someone else or "just started" dating someone else or not dating at all, then you know you're out of the running as a romantic partner.  If you value the friendship you started with her and can handle just staying friends, then keep her as a friend.  Feelings can change over time for women once they know a man very well.

    You sound like a good guy.  Good luck!

 
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