I think you just have to start with forgiveness. I forgive you every day. I think it takes time...but if you see the person as a good person..see them how you'd like them to be..remember all the good things they've done. All the good times you've shared..remembering the best self of them, that is there true self. Forgiveness is difficult at first...but the more you focus on the positive...the positive will become your reality. Instead of focusing on the negatives, focus on the positive. Learn to let it go. Not for them, or that they deserve it. Just forgive them because you need to for yourself. Healing your own heart, and releasing the anger, resentments, fears, insecurities. Learn not to allow anyone to effect you emotionally. You have detach from the negative emotions. What I tell people is to send that person love. Think of giving them an imaginary rose every day, saying an affirmation "I love you anyway. I forgive you for hurting me. I know this isn't about me. It's about you, because someone hurt you." I think if you try these things in a few weeks it becomes easier. Judgement will only make matters worse, as well as arguing, blaming, criticising, yelling, screaming. That only pushes them away. If you need to release your emotions, than write, paint, draw, or do something artistically, or musically. It clears all the negativity out. You're not harming no one, not yourself, or another person, but releasing it from yourself.