Should the man propose to a woman or should it be flexible? Why or why not?

1. 66

   KrystalDposted 8 years ago

   Should the man propose to a woman or should it be flexible? Why or why not?
   
   Lately there have been more women popping the question. What are your thoughts about this? Also, what are your thoughts about a couple buying an engagement ring together?
   
   

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2. 68

   Mihnea Andreescuposted 8 years ago

   I think people should stick to the traditional way of proposing-it definitely sounds more romantic for a man to propose a woman than vice versa.I wouldn't like to see women proposing men, it just sounds wrong.Buying an engagement ring together is not a bad idea though-it helps the couple to start learning how to take decisions together.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      There's nothing "wrong" with getting what you want!

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3. 71

   thranaxposted 8 years ago

   I think it should be flexible. Why can't a girl propose to a man? They are equal partners nowadays. Its pretty fitting too, because more then not - she will have a job and be the bread winner and he will be looking for a job for a long time. *Thats a joke everyone*
   
   Seriously, I think a girl proposing to a man would be even more romantic then a man proposing to a girl. They are the ones skilled in the area anyway.

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I agree. The end result is much more important than (who) initiated the proposal!
      It amazes me how many people are willing to place self imposed limits, restrictions, and obstacles in their path to happiness!

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4. 76

   realtalk247posted 8 years ago

   Mistake. Typically it is harder for a man to commit than a woman when it comes to a long term relationship.  You want your partner to want you and step up and claim the woman he loves.  If you start a relationship asking him to marry you -it may be a sign that you are into the relationship more than he is and will consequently always put more effort into the relationship. Besides, the last thing you want to hear if there are issues: "You asked me to marry you." 
   It may sound old-fashioned but there is something about a man proposing to a woman that is not only romantic but necessary to sustain the relationship.

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   1. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      "If you start a relationship asking him to marry you -it may be a sign that you are into the relationship more than he is"
      It's a good thing (men) don't look it that way when they propose! Ego & pride have kept a lot of women unhappy.

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5. 81

   dashingscorpioposted 8 years ago

   
   
   An old adage goes: "If it's not worth asking for it's not worth having."
   
   There is nothing wrong with a woman proposing to a man especially if they've been in a long-term committed relationship for years.
   
   Too often women will say they "want it to be the man's idea" and then when it's not happening they'll give him an (ultimatum) or keep dropping "hints". That's the same as her "indirectly proposing".
   
   Another group of women are content to "suffer in silence" and if the relationship ends they{ blame the man} for "wasting (their) time"!
   
   I suspect quite a few of them also {fear rejection} or being put off. However at least they'll know where they stand and can move on.
   
   For a lot of women it comes down to their "pride" or "ego" along with still having the desire to live out the "fairytale" portrayed in movies.
   
   The real issue here is all of her girlfriends and family will be asking her how, where, and when did (he) propose?
   
   They'd be too embarrassed to admit they did the proposing!.
   
   When it's all said and done if a couple does get married it shouldn't make a difference as to who proposed to whom.
   The end results are the same!!!
   
   As for shopping together for the engagement/wedding ring I believe it's the best way to assure the bride gets a ring that (she) loves!
   I can't tell you how often I've read or heard of women seeking advice about how to approach their man with the news that they don't really like their engagement ring without hurting his feelings.
   My wife and I enjoyed shopping for her ring as we learned all about the "4 Cs" (Cut, Color, Clarity & Carat)
   The reality is most men want their wives to have a ring they love!

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   1. 68

      Mihnea Andreescuposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      That's a very good answer.I liked it-I agree with you on the idea of women dropping hints ,thus indirectly proposing men,but  direct proposals done by women do not sound as a very good idea to me.Shopping for a ring together sounds cool though!

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   2. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Yes there are lots of women who would never propose to a man but they have no problem "twisting his arm" with an ultimatum! Which sounds more desperate? Asking or forcing? Perception is reality!

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6. 70

   connorjposted 8 years ago

   No, no, no, never-ever, no way, none - Jose'! A man should always propose to a woman.
   Wait a moment, there are exceptions, there is a beautiful singer, named Loreena McKennett, a most beautiful soul and a haunting voice that should propose to me! I change my tune immediately, there needs to be flexibility so two souls can unite. Souls have no gender...

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   1. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      "Souls have no gender" - Very true!
      Neither does love and desire. Traditions are man made.

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   2. 66

      KrystalDposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      "Souls have no gender" and "traditions are man made" are both excellent points.

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      connorjposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Perhaps not all traditions are indeed "man"-made; consider, the entry of the Christ...

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      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      John, Some people believe religion is man made as well!

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7. 40

   Stephanie Chavezposted 7 years ago

   I am new here and was just perusing some questions and yours stood out. There is something to be said about romance, chivalry, and tradition. As you stated, traditions are man-made and you are correct in that but it doesn't make them wrong. In a society when so many things are constantly changing, keeping certain things the same... in a way... roots us. I am all for smashing "gender roles" in a relationship. Being the top bread winner no longer needs to be solely for the male and doing all the housework no longer needs to be just for the female. Every once in a while though it is nice to be treated to having the car door opened for me, flowers bought for me just because, and even bigger- to be proposed to. Personally, I have always imagined that magical moment when my love gets down on one knee to ask me to be his forever. There are many things that we compromise on but this is one thing that I would like to retain my position on.
   We have actually had this discussion and come to a bit of a compromise (we are good at those). He agreed to be the one to propose in keeping with tradition, but I will in turn also buy him an "engagement ring" of sorts so as to romance him as well. This way he also has a symbol of our commitment to each other (prior to exchanging wedding bands) that he can wear proudly!

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