dashingscorpio profile image 84

Is marrying someone you don't love the ultimate definition of settling?


Recently a question was asked on HP: Is it more important for you to marry someone who loves you than to marry someone (you) love? A few folks stated they'd rather be with someone (who loves them) rather than they themselves being "in love". Essentially the belief is if someone is "in love" with you they'll treat you right. However this begs the question: If you don't love your spouse can you really be "happy" with them? Is it settling? Is it fair? Aren't you more likely to fantasize or consider cheating with someone whom you do have chemistry with or melts your heart if given the chance?

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gmwilliams profile image84

Best Answer Grace Marguerite Williams (gmwilliams) says

15 months ago
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  • dashingscorpio profile image

    dashingscorpio 15 months ago

    Excellent Points! (Some people have low self-esteem and would consider themselves lucky to find someone who loves them) There are others who want love they're unwilling to give! Maybe they got hurt once and said: "Never again!"

    They're takers!


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Deborah Demander profile image90

Deborah Demander says

6 weeks ago
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tsmog profile image84

Tim Mitchell (tsmog) says

15 months ago
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  • dashingscorpio profile image

    dashingscorpio 15 months ago

    The concept of "settling" will always remain as long some people (feel) they could have chosen a better mate for themselves. They're saying they didn't get what they wanted but took what they could get.

    We're talking about those not in love.


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Dreamlin profile image80

Dreamlin says

15 months ago
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  • dashingscorpio profile image

    dashingscorpio 15 months ago

    I agree with you about "true love" being lasting.

    I want to know if you believe a person who'd only marry someone that (loved them more) is settling? Controlling? Selfish? Cheating their mate out of being with someone who'd love them equally?


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passionatelearnr profile image86

passionatelearnr says

15 months ago
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  • dashingscorpio profile image

    dashingscorpio 15 months ago

    However is it settling? Are you cheating them out of the opportunity to be with someone who actually does love (them)? Are you cheating yourself out of the joy of being with someone you're "in love" with?

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