I wanted to attempt to answer your question, though not directed to me...so I hope you don't mind giving my opinion. Being spiritual as I know it as a christian...can be fun at times...just life in general has fun moments.. It is definitely not all fun though... In your search and striving to be more like God is not a fun process sometimes...can be overwhelming, painful, hard, and life long. But to me ..it is worth every minute of the pain...to feel the love of God with you always....Something you can't describe..a high you cant get in drugs and the gift of everlasting life...blessings to you in your search..