I had that discussion with my hubby yesterday. The thing is to take a few step back and not reacting when you see it coming, some men or people link your upset to the care you have for them. If you love them,, you will still get upset. I t is like with children pushing the limits to get attention!
My husband will call me anytime I touch my keyboard for random useless things or have the kids gang on me so I don't have my quality time...why? because he can use me the best when my mind is on clear!!!
SO, be aware and prepared, a lot of people use that same trick to control, manipulate or simply comfort themselves in their relationship.
Love and peace to you