I hate trying to give relationship advice, mainly because i don't know the people personally and because each relationship is dependent on both partners capability of working together. i'm not saying you are in a bad relationship because you can't work together, no not in the least. I'm just saying that both partners have to work through problems together.
In your case, from what I have read alone, I wonder if your ex even knows what love is. It sounds like he is simply using the word because he knows it's what you want to hear. Again I don't know you or him so I don't know if I am right and I'm not saying i am. But if you or he is simply holding on because either of you just want that safety of having someone, then is it worth it? In the end does he make you a better person, do you make him a better person? All I am saying is in the end will your struggle to be together benefit you for the better or will it only break you down?