eHarmony Reviews: Long Distance Christian Relationships Dating Stories

When I entered my forties as a single man, my family and friends began to say I would never marry. It wasn't long before I started to believe them. I decided to try online dating which was a huge step of faith for me because I couldn't see how it would work. I didn't believe in long distance relationships and felt the odds of finding the right person within a 50 mile radius of home was slim. What I had never considered before was that even in dating faith knows no boundaries. I decided I needed to trust God and take a step of faith into the world of online dating.

Being a devout christian, naturally I was looking for someone with a similar faith and vision. It was also important to me to find a woman who had saved herself for marriage because that was what I had done. While looking at the different dating sites available, the one that stuck out from all the rest was eharmony.

There were a couple of reasons why eHarmony impressed me more than other dating sites I had researched. First, singles were prescreened on "29 Dimensions® of Compatibility" which were scientific predictors of longterm relationship success." Second, there were several stages of introduction that allowed me to get to know more about the woman whose profile I found interesting, before deciding whether I would like to communicate with her.

I decided to sign up for a year because I had learned from experience that achieving anything worthwhile takes time. After spending several months searching locally for a suitable marriage partner I found that I was having no more success with eHarmony than with other methods of meeting woman I had tried in the past. I was puzzled. I felt I had taken a step of faith only to reach a dead end. In order to meet someone through eHarmony I felt I would need to pursue a long distance relationship. My understanding of long-distance relationships was that they were rarely successful because of the challenges they posed. I became discouraged and almost gave up on eHarmony.

Then something happened that changed my mind. A passage of scripture came to mind. "Jesus looked at them intently and said, “Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But with God everything is possible" Matthew 19:26 NLT. This Vince Lombardi quote also helped: "quitters never win and winners never quit." It was time to take my faith to a new level and expand my eHarmony search perimeters to include all of North America.

I would like to say that after changing my search perimeters that I found my perfect match the next day. The truth is I had work hard at finding the right person for 21 months.

After nearly 2 years I began to grow weary of online dating and almost quit again. Then one morning, while I was looking through my new eharmony matches there she was, the woman of my dreams. Her name was Janet, she was beautiful, had similar goals and interests to mine and required a Christ-centered marriage.

I invited Janet to begin communications. When she agreed we ended up writing 48 emails back and forth over the next month. We quickly became great friends. I knew eventually I would have to meet her in person and get to know her on a more personal level. The problem was that she lived 1200 miles away. We managed to get together for the weekend, once a month, over the next four months. I began to realize that these weekend visits were not allowing me to spend enough time with her to take the relationship to the next level.

I felt I would have to take another leap of faith and move to her town. Not only would I have to leave my job, family and friends but I would have to move to a country where I wasn't legally entitled to work. Continuing the relationship under these circumstances went far beyond my reasoning, but lots of prayer gave a strong peace to keep going. My continual prayer would be " Lord as long as I continue to feel your peace with each step of faith I take, I will not turn back.

I called Janet on the phone and after discussing our relationship we agreed that one of us would have to move. After examining both are situations we agreed it would be better if I moved. Before long I packed up all my belongings and moved to her town. We were married 3 months later. October 15 was our fifth wedding anniversary and through the years we have continued to grow closer and the peace of God that led me to my new home has remained with me until this day.

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Comments 37 comments

Shelley Bernard 6 years ago

This is a beautiful story Steve. I am so happy that my cousin, Janet, found someone so wonderful to spend her life with. It may have taken a little time, but God truly blessed you both!


einron profile image

einron 6 years ago from Toronto, Ontario, CANADA

Very glad for you. Glad also that you are a Christian and have strong Christian values. May God bless both of you.


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 6 years ago from South Africa

Oh, this is awesome! I’ve tried this too, and was much in love until the final leap when we tested togetherness in reality.

The problem is – in cyberspace we see only each others souls and hearts and thoughts, while in reality we see everything else but the soul, heart and thoughts. We see each others habits, the good ones and the bad ones, the way we conduct ourselves, the way we treat others... et cetera. The chance that you may stay in love with the person you’ve met in cyberspace is 10%. So one has to be very wise....

Congratulations to you. I will never try this again, because the pain I experience when I realize that God was just teaching me another lesson in life, instead of answering my prayers, is quite unbearable and confusing for a while.

I wish you another 25 years together!


Diane Inside profile image

Diane Inside 6 years ago

This is such a sweet story, I used to think God would provide a mate for me, but what I didn't remember is that God helps those who help themselves. Instead of sitting back and waiting we sometimes have to put ourselves out there. I'm glad you found love. A very sweet hub.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 6 years ago

What a beautiful story with a marvelous ending.


FGual profile image

FGual 6 years ago from USA

What a great story, eHarmony knows what they are doing apparently. You are a lucky man.


Earth Angel profile image

Earth Angel 6 years ago

Happy 5th Anniversary!!

What a lovely story!! Thank you for sharing!!

Blessings always, Earth Angel!!


stevemark122000 profile image

stevemark122000 6 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks everyone for your comments!

Martie, I am sorry to hear that things did not work out for you online. Your comment has made me realize that there are some important details I left out of this hub so stay tuned.


quuenieproac profile image

quuenieproac 6 years ago from Malaysia

Such a lovely story. Wishing you a happy 5th wedding anniversary.

I am going to celebrate my 40th wedding anniversary end of this year! Time flies, enjoy life.

God bless.


ghomefitness profile image

ghomefitness 6 years ago from Chicago,IL

Happy Anniversary! What a leap of faith, it seams most great things take that kind of leap.


FloBe profile image

FloBe 6 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

I also met my husband on eHarmony and we got married in May. It was orchestrated by God in an amazing way...so, for us, we'd have to agree that it really does work :)


stevemark122000 profile image

stevemark122000 6 years ago from Southern California Author

ghomefitness, well put, leaps of faith are an important part of victorious Christian living.

Flobe, thanks for your comment. Yes it really does work. We have seen several friends of ours try eHarmony after seeing our success. The found there match on eHarmony and are now happily married.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago

Beautiful story!!! thank you for sharing and I wish you many more years of love and happiness!!


LeslieAdrienne profile image

LeslieAdrienne 6 years ago from Georgia

I agree with everyone else....yours is a beautiful story! Happy anniversary and of course may you have many, many more.


brakel2 profile image

brakel2 6 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Steve - I hope that you have many happy years. My daughter has not had success with online dating, and I will email this story to her. She is a good Christian and if you can do it so can she. Happy anniversary. What a great love story. It could be in a magazine. It touched my heart.


Dorrene 6 years ago

I loved your story. I too had a happy ending after using an online dating service. I really met my best friend and we've been married for 10 years now! Our biggest commonality was that we are both Methodist! I enjoy all your Hubs as I am very interested in natural healing. God bless you and keep up the good work!


stevemark122000 profile image

stevemark122000 6 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks singlemomat52 for your comment!

I appreciate your comment Leslie!

Well thanks brakel2, I appreciate your comment!

I hope your daughter finds a good Christian man.

Thanks for your comment Dorrene! Glad to here you were successful with online dating.


Allan Douglas profile image

Allan Douglas 6 years ago from Great Smoky Mountains, Tennessee

I'm forwarding thus URL to a friend of mine who desperately needs to read this encouragment. Thanks!

Oh, and my wife and I found each other through a newspaper personals ad - something I always said I'd never do. But God worked it out so perfectly we knew He was in it.


Megavitamin profile image

Megavitamin 6 years ago

Lovely story. Congratulations!


bayoulady profile image

bayoulady 6 years ago from Northern Louisiana,USA

a beautiful story. glad it worked for you! AS handsome as you are, and obviously intelligent too, I don't see why some nice young lady hadn't already caught your eye. (I can say this because my daughter is 43..I'm old enough to be your mama..lol!)


lyjo 6 years ago

I'm so very happy for both of you, Happy Anniversary, God Bless you always, another enjoyable hub, thanks & take really good care, both of you!


stevemark122000 profile image

stevemark122000 6 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks for sharing your story Allan?

Megavitamin, thanks for stopping by!

Thanks bayoulady, looking back at my past the timing feels right.

Thanks lyjo, I always appreciate your comments!


Fullerman5000 profile image

Fullerman5000 6 years ago from Louisiana, USA

Great story man. Yeah, i have thought about trying one of these sites out. After ready this story, i think to myself that i would not hurt to try. Thanks for sharing.


eHarmony_jack 6 years ago

Hi Steve,

What a wonderful and inspiring story. It is amazing what can happen if you dedicate yourself to a goal and are willing to think outside the box! We are so happy that eHarmony had the opportunity to bring you and Janet together.

There are so many aspects of your story that I know would be inspiring to eHarmony members still looking for their special match. So, if you haven't already done so, we'd love for you to share your story with our Success Stories team. You can find a link on any of our site pages.

Happy 5th Wedding Anniversary!

Jack


jill of alltrades profile image

jill of alltrades 6 years ago from Philippines

Wow! What a beautiful and inspiring story!

Happy 5th Anniversary!


stevemark122000 profile image

stevemark122000 6 years ago from Southern California Author

Jack thanks for your comment. I will submit the story to the eHarmony success story team.

Thanks for your comment Jill and for stopping by.


KKalmes profile image

KKalmes 6 years ago from Chicago, Illinois

Hello SM, my eHarmony story is not quite the success... after 2 hours of answering compatibility questions, I got a response saying "they were sorry, but there are occasions when they cannot offer their services because they feel the cannot be successful matching a profile".

All I kept thinking was "how many sex-offenders, rapists, married men, perverts, wife-beaters, 16 year olds, ex-cons" have they taken profiles from and they couldn't accept mine. A 40 year old woman raising two kids successfully, working successfully, homeowner, dog, close family... what could I possibly have conveyed in my answers?

The mind of an ax murderer?

Seriously, I stink at relationships, but I have never killed any ex-lovers, or ex-husbands... not that I haven't written about killing them off... just not worth the jail time.


Neverletitgo profile image

Neverletitgo 6 years ago from Minneapolis, MN

Happy anniversary Steve. This is a miracle my friend. I am glad that you won finally. Thanks for sharing your true story for finding your sweetheart.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK

Happy anniversary :-)


Sa`ge profile image

Sa`ge 6 years ago from Barefoot Island

Beautiful story, many happy returns to both of you!

:D hugs :D


Karen 6 years ago

Steve, yours is a beautiful story. Congratulations to both of you and may you both share many years together.

I have to say I too tried eharmony for two years, including the lond distance relationship, but never got any replies. I guess it works for some but not all.


KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

KoffeeKlatch Gals 6 years ago from Sunny Florida

What a wonderful story. I often wondered if eHarmony actually worked. It looks like it does. Good luck to the two of you. It reminds me of the quote "Good things come to those who wait."


stevemark122000 profile image

stevemark122000 6 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks for your comment koffeeKlatch Gals! Yes that quote is so true. A good friend of mine and good friend of my wife both had been waiting for quite awhile and after seeing our success decided to try eHarmony. Both found their match long distance and now both are happily married.


OmNaser profile image

OmNaser 6 years ago from kuwait

you are very lucky to find a good woman online , I could not trust anyone and fear the idea of a man would totally lie to me ...unless i know him in person


frogyfish profile image

frogyfish 6 years ago from Central United States of America

A beautifully related success story...and like you emphasized, guided by the hands of God - and aided with your persistence! Congratulations to you both, with many happy years together ahead - and for Eternity too!


Effy 5 years ago

Be quietly confident that when the time is right

You and your love will be together

Your souls destined to unite


Efficient Admin profile image

Efficient Admin 3 years ago from Charlotte, NC

Wow this is an awesome story. It is also inspiring for anyone looking for their Christian mate. Thanks for sharing, voted up and interesting. P.S. did you live in another country and not the USA? I see you are in Southern CA now. Is that where Janet lived?

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