I couldn't find a thread for this - if there is one then many apologies.
I have been in more than a few relationships - not all of them sexual - most of them not. I know there are many out there who would disagree with my antics but lets brush that awside for the moment.
I would like everyone to post a bit about their own experience so that we all have a place to go to for advice if we experience bumps along the way.
If you are like me you are in a relationship which you would like to see working. You are in love and you do not want to be with anyone else - but you are quite different from your partner and it can often be a bit of a struggle.
My tip is this - If you can't trust him to take out the garbage then do it yourself and ask him to do something he will remember - like go out for beer and get you chocolate whilst he's gone. I have to remind myself at all times that we are a team, we really are a partnership - and we can't work against each other.
Accept that your partner is flawed. They are only human after all.
I actually have a couple hubs on this, and a few how-to's on eHow.
If you can't communicate, you are done.
Give and take is essential, always respect each others views and opinions, don't expect the other to change for you, you either take them as they are or not at all, and the man should always make breakfast in bed!
I've found that listening to your partner and basically paying attention is really important also learning to compromise is up there too.
Sorry if I'm being cliched but these helped me in relationships with friends lovers and colleagues.
Try and do sweet thing s from time to time, even if it makes you appear weak, it will make you appear stronger in the long run.
i THINK I HAVE ABOUT 5 GREAT HUBS ON THIS PLEASE CHECK THEM OUT MOST OF WHAT I SAY IS BASED ON FIRST HAND EXPERIENCE THROUGH EITHER MYSELF OR FRIENDS.
I wrote 5 hubs about Relationship Communication specifically on How to Mend a Broken Relationship and How to Maintain a Healthy Relationship. You might want to check it out.
When things come up in my relationship that bother myself or my partner, sometimes we make up contracts. Like, he doesn't like me swearing, and i don't like his constant farting and other hygiene habits. So we make a contract that states:IE: Marcel will make the utmost effort to refrain from using fowl language. Rob will make a clear effort to fart less often, or not around Marcel, and will remember to wash his hands after handling food. Then we will both sign it, and stick it somewhere where we can reflect on it occasionally.
You've really got to make a constant effort to keep each other happy if you are in it for the long haul.
Just telling him that you love him. I like to buy cards, lots of love cards, thank you cards, thinking of you cards and then periodically I will fill them out with how much I love him and all that mushy stuff that he loves and I put the cards where he'll find them. He tells me how much he appreciates it.
communication is the most important it will easer make or break the relationship
Sometimes when relationships get comfortable, it seems there is a switch flipped. Things you never thought of a person doing or not doing they do or not do:( The reminder, that we are on the same side, the what may seem to the apposing partner is not the enemy!
We, like you said, all have our faults...just doing what wasn't done, takes less time or the same as complaining about it. It is nice to give one another grace, once in awhile:)
One thing, that I realized recently, is that when I was young, my father always took the garbage out. At home, I take the garbage out allot. One day I shared with my spouse, how things were, when I was young..., he gave me grace!
Without me asking, he started taking the garbage out more! Yepeee! Seems small, yet the little things sometimes carry allot of weight:)
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