i was seeing this guy for bout 2 1/2 years and he deceides to move to mexico then he cheated we boke up got back to gether then cheated for several montjs then when he came back 6 months later i nroke up then we got back together nut i wasn't his "girlfriend" i was his "girl" everythinh was as if we were boyfriend and girlfriend he even told his friends we were but we werent and well thats putting it short...
You were one of his girls. Like the flavor of the month. He is not ready for relationship and is just stringing you along, and being very selfish about it. Deal with Accept it or reject it, but do not be his dish rag. Me to me never really grow up,the just get a little wiser. wise cracks.
I think guys make things complicated (in relationships) because they are insecure. But not all guys are complicated though...especially the wham, bam, thank you mam types....they just do it and go on about their way...it's those who want to come back for seconds that make it complicated!
Insecure? You are joking right? Please, I've seen more men who are arrogant, self-absorbed, ego-maniacal than anything else. So, insecurity is not their problem.
Apparently, the men you've met have that attitude. However, there are the exceptions and if women do as I said above, pay attention(everything he does) and listen to the words he uses, then you will know what you need to know. Simple enough. No complication.
Sure, I am drawing on my own thrice divorced experience! I am talking about the insecure part...not the wham bam part! So you are saying that a man won't be complicated if the woman heeds his beck and call?
Where in anything I said did you come up with that impression? WOW!
A woman is to be true to herself. If he asks her to do something, then she has two choices- do it or do not.
Beck and call, is a foolish control game. If you've meet a man who want you to be at his beck and call, then he better be willing to pump the neighbor's dog. Because, if she is going to bend over backwards for him, it better be received back in an equal manner- otherwise the relationship is destined to fail.
"Insecure? You are joking right? Please, I've seen more men who are arrogant, self-absorbed, ego-maniacal than anything else. So, insecurity is not their problem"
Yes it is if they feel they must put on such acts then they are blatantly insecure. A real man doesn't need to overdo himself to be considered confident and manly. I do get your points - well taken. You are talking about good guys, though. I was referring to the arrogant, self-absorbed, ego types...as I inferred ...I was married to three insecure men. I will not do that again! Thanks Cag
There is a strange phenomena known as male bashing, and I think it is a form of sexism as well, some guys may be insecure but why generalize? I think if a man who looks for a strong independent women like yourself becomes insecure it might be a result of indifferent man hating! (I am so just kidding)
I would say you have a bigger problem. Just from what you explained. He might be simply playing you? Unlikely, but it could be the case.
I stand by my original post. If he is stepping up and learning to respect you? Is still to be seen by you and if it continues.
My recommendation in my original post was for you to keep paying attention to everything about him. The way he acts, the way he talks, the way he reacts, watch facial expression(even liars give tells that they don't know about) and mostly listen to how he talks to you and others in your presence.
See if things change, either for the better or the worse. You'll be ahead of him, because he won't know you're doing it. Unless, he likes to watch people himself and is good at it.