Do men and women ignore warning signs in a relationship thinking they can change the other person? Sometimes there is a compromise....but when there's not, it can have a sad ending. Do we learn from our mistakes?
Ab-So-Lu-Te-Ly! Especially in the first stage of a relationship we're so effected by the honeymoon period emotions that we tend to overlook signs that will most certainly turn out to make a mess in the relationship's future. Also, it is hard to find the perfect match nowadays, so sometimes we settle thinking that we shouldn't be as picky as judging the other's character in such detail. I say, if the warning signs are something that you are able to deal with, minor stuff such as snoring or leaving a wet towel on the bed now and then, that shouldn't be of major concern. BUT, if the warning signs include lying, or the impossibility to communicate properly with your partner, then I'd think twice before thinking I could change someone who has been corrupted by these vices all his/her life.
Sure we do! No one wants to be wrong and certainly not proven wrong, or to feel a fool, so yeah we let our heart leads us and igore the signals in our brain until it's too late. Ah, but that's life!
Oh yeah, we tend to look the other way although the signs are clearly visible. From experience, people cannot change, and if you see from the very beginning that that's how it's going to be you only have two choices; stay and deal with the person as he/she is or get out before you get too invested.
This is a difficult question, yet so easy for others to relate to. Learning to watch for the warning signs and acting on them is the key to protecting yourself from possible rejection and turmoil.
Yes, we do learn from our mistakes but, sadly, we often continue the pattern again because it is familiar to us and any other way is alien. It takes modeling and self-discipline to train yourself to become strong enough to walk away.
I have written a hub on this very subject; several, I might add.
It takes both intuition and courage to know yourself well enough to know what "warning signs" you're seeing and to act on them. Of course the whole idea of being in a romantic relationship tends to color our viewpoints -- especially as noted during the honeymoon phase.
You can look at your partner's past history with relationships (including JOBS) and family interactions and learn a LOT.
Don't forget we all try to be on our "best behavior" in the beginning. Someone who is overly charming is quite likely NOT really charming.
Pay attention to that gut -- it's usually correct. If something doesn't feel right, it probably isn't!
But in the end, there is always an element of faith involved. We are humans, after all!
Yep warning signs are often ignored. Most people want to believe they have the magic touch and that with enough of their awesome love, they can fix the other person.
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