I'm sure it's fine, but I prefer to know the man is interested enough to ask me first. If I'm interested, I'll accept. If we continue dating, then I would certainly plan a date night, inviting him for dinner or a day trip somewhere.
I have paid for dinners with men I was in relationships with for a long time, but never a first date. They were gentlemen who preferred paying. Only one man wanted me to pay for a second dinner date after the check came.. I paid half and that was the last date with him.
in this case, after listening to him bash his former wife, I really don't think he was ready to be dating again. His dating savvy was sorely lacking. No woman wants to hear a man bashing another woman on any date.
yer right elle i found this 2 be very true after my 6th devorce,do not mention another woman when u are with another it is very bad and dangerous as i know this to be true ,one wife i had one time after commin' in late one night and going to sleep awoke straped 2 the bed and her with a 8in long butcher knife standing over me wantin' to know who the womans was i was mumblin' in my sleep.thank god the phone rang with a emergency from her mother so i know about it u c my friend,well i gota go on a date see you adios.
hey jeff rod what u talkin' eatin' dates,what kina dates u eatin' man where u gona go to eat dates,Arabs eat their dates but we don't have no date palms over here man are u nuts what is wrong with you dates in bowls,cats climbin' up trees,thatd be like sayin' Napoleon pulled a bone apart or something i wish i knew where youz gettin' all these dates umm i believe i'll get me some adios.
Yeah I did... actually more than one! And approached by someone... sure! Women approach too but the process is different. They usually make the first move by doing something that compel men to ask for a date. But I like the way women trap men... it's so exciting!
I'm an emotional yet unconventional guy... I like to enjoy my life with good people. I did wish to fall in love with a woman for a purpose. But that was the way of life when I was not married. It's been three and half years now that I'm married to a woman with a beautiful mind. So I don't want to fall in love anymore. But when I was in search for my better half I met a lot of women whom I asked for a date or I was approached by some of them. I used to meet women with the intention of finding the true wave length that matches my type... so I used to have a lot of conversation with them. It took almost seven years to complete the process. But I enjoyed every moment of it... without touching them ever, heaven's sake! I got invited by a few to do naughty things with them... but I avoided tactfully. The invitations made me excited enough but I had to keep myself in control, because I knew that the short term relationship might not just end up in marriage. My wife knows everything about my past before our marriage, I told her everything and she had no objections because she understands me... and I too, and that's the mantra of a successful marriage. I was misunderstood by many of my female friends... they call me a flirt. But I know who I'm and I don't regret. I know what I did to them is for the benefit of not only myself but also for them. An unsuccessful marriage is bad for both. This is the first time I'm sharing it in public. Thanks!
That is a great experience and thank you for sharing Andycool. I think that you found the real one and your waiting time was over. How did you know she is the one after all the many women who are coming your way?
Yes, I've been asked out numerous times in my life. In that situation, it is nice if the woman pays, but if she doesn't, that's no problem either. So, I don't really 'expect' anything. As I said in the other thread, if I invite, I always pay. I'll also pay on any date, romantic or non-romantic, when people talk about splitting the bill, or seem to be having trouble opening their wallets etc
well you know what they say about gentlemen,they ain't much fun but i think most these rats are lyin' or wantin' to don't be taken in by all the train smoke,corse a woman wants to hear sweet things even if they know they are a lie us real men know that ,i'm not supposed 2 tell u this its a male credo i could get barred from the women chasers club if they ever found out but this is what makes us most macho well i gota go the phone rang another girl wants a date.
I'd say a good and subtle way is to start a conversation about a movie, or about certain food and drink, and then suggest, as though it had only just occurred to you, that you could both go to see that movie, or to that great restaurant where they specialize in that particular food or whatever.
Nope. Have to disagree, though you are the guy and may know better. I say, don't be timid, don't be subtle. It's too easy to be misread. Tell the guy you would like to take him out. Be specific. "John, I'd like to take you out to a great restaurant I found." "Oh, really, prettydarkhorse? What's the restaurant?" "Blah, blah blah restaurant downtown. Great food. How's Saturday?" "Oh, sorry dark, I'm not free Saturday." "How's Friday?" If he says no again, say, "OK, maybe another time, then." You've now been humiliated. Smile, turn and walk away. Do not look back. Do not lower your head as you walk. In fact, put an extra swivel in your hips. He'll be watching you walk away. If he is interested, now he knows you are and will ask you out. If he says yes to your invitation, you better have a plan and yes, you absolutely pay the entire bill. Don't have less than $100. on you or a credit card in case you want to extend the evening. It would even be good if, whether he says yes or no, to give him one of those guy pats on the bicep before you leave saying "pick you up at 7".
What's with the trend thing? No trend. It's just the way it's always been. A man would never expect or want a woman to ask him out. Heaven forbid such boldness. Your generation is much more Renaissance. Guys go to baby and wedding showers now, they have groom cakes at their weddings, they cry, all very cool and human things to do. Well, hell, if we have to wear pants, you have to cry.
I do not know this trend thing you speak of. I've just literally never met a woman who asked a guy out on a date. Additionally, while many woman have expressed their approval in this thread, I still haven't seen any evidence to support they have actually asked a man out. However, I have witnessed what Mega spoke about many times. Hinting, but never flat out asking. My generation, LOL!
When you're in the dating world a really good hint is always 100% better than a request of any kind. I learned this from my mother and others in her generation. I guess it is kind of outdated, but I consider it part of the game. Only later, after you're married - hints stop working, is my experience, so you either have to seize control and tell him when and where you're both going and all, and also be sure you seize control of the bank account!
IF you feel comfortable with the guy and want to ask him to go out with you - do it! You can say "I want to pay for our night out - my treat" or "We could go dutch treat" or not say anything and play it by ear. But if you aren't comfortable asking, there are many ways to really let him know you would like to go out with him - mentioning great places you like to go, asking if he's ever gone there - saying things like "I bet we would have a lot of fun at such and such" gives him the opening to say "Would you like to go there on Saturday?" This way if he doesn't want to ask or would turn you down if you asked, neither of you get rejected.
OR You can say "I was at that concert last week and thought of you - I know you would have loved it! Wish I'd been with you!" stuff like that. Hint around. I don't feel very comfortable asking someone, unless we've already gone out before and I know for sure he'd like to go - and probably I would have a definite place in mind, a reason for asking him.
...i think it's okay too...i asked my divorce lawyer (Bob) out....he picked up the tab...and Bill got the legal bill (hey that rhymes)....it all worked out fine for me!....but then....as some of you may know Bob said I do...and the rest was history....haven't asked anyone out since....later maybe!
You married your divorce lawyer !!!!!!!! You are in deep doo doo if you ever split with him He will not only get his half of everything, he will get your check for half the bill and steal the rest from you No wonder you are behaving these days !!
no problem.....we split up not long after....Bob was a good guy....just not my type really.....should have dated him a few more times...i made him sign a pre-nup.....i'm free as a bird again.....i sent him a bill for the divorce party!....if you see him around, say hi! to him for me......I think he's somewhere in China now......
holy Mary mother of god talk about heart attack waitin' 2 happen,pass the chocolate syrup bucket and whipped cream and a few dozen hamburgers for appetizers geezz i hope theirz plenty ventilation in case of a gas attack Aquila pasha see u soon. blob er bob
I think it's okay to ask a man out. Unless it ends up being a one way deal...you know, if it's always the woman doing the asking. I remember being terrified to do so when I was single. But after I started seeing someone regular, it was no problem.
I think if it was the first time to ask, I'd just sort of casually say: "Hey, do you wanna catch a movie with me? I've been wanting to see........" Take it from there. OR "You wanna go for coffee after work tomorrow? Or dinner?"
Then you could either meet them there or make other arrangements.
I think the woman just needs to be herself. I think it doesn't have so much to do with boldness, but a woman feeling good about who she is, a self confidence that attracts the man in a way in which he wants to be with you.
Right, being "natural" is the game, if it sounds like you are trying to be bold, then it may sound not you, it could be fun if we just present who we are and act naturally, (me, might get nervous, LOL)
pay for a date? are you serious? to be honest, king larry doesn't know the meaning of the word PAY. no, on every date, im on with a chick, i always make sure she knows a few things about me. 1)I'm an honest jerk and I can be brutally honest...pinhead! 2)Neither of us pays for jack. No, what I do is have us order like the most expensive crap on the menu we can think of, then I lie to the waiter that I'm like some sort of food review critic, and they give us free food, since they want a favorable review. wink wink.
If that don't work, then I always make sure I carry a dead rat or bug inside a pouch and put it on like my desert and complain about it, so the restaurant will give us that meal for free to shut us up. Or there's the classic method...pretend you both have to use the restroom, and RUN! hahahahaha
I see nothing wrong with. But I felt shy and humbled the first time that a lady asked me, because i actually had interest in the lady but was waiting for the perfect time to ask here out which never came. Thank God she eventually did!
I think a woman should never ask. Suggest, hint etc and if he dont get it then he is just too stupid. If a woman asks a guy out then you get the whole confusion of who drives, who pays, who is going to be on top in bed. Just a real hassle.
I think it's okay for a woman to ask a guy out on a date. The worst that can happen is that he might say no. You could indicate that you're going Dutch. It's not as though you're going to get married on the first date.
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