If she doesn't allow you to touch her there, you probably shouldn't! If she isn't in the mood, you shouldn't try and make her do anything. If this is a common problem, you should try to be more intimate with her OUTSIDE the bedroom. Most of the time, this means she isn't comfortable with you, or your past experiences in the bedroom. As a woman, I would tell you to talk to her about it.
I totally agree with this response. If I had a problem in the bedroom, I have to start feeling comfortable again before I let anything happen.
Taking the romance outside of the bedroom with a little patience may help her return to that comfort zone with you. You also need to figure out if you did anything that might have made her react this way.
I guess my advice is incomplete... dont give up. Start analyzing, what are the things you think made you sexy the first time she saw you. Look at yourself in the mirror. search for more things, aside from physical ways, to make yourself sexy! I assure you...it's not only physical ways. example a food... Just by looking at a palatable food makes one drool, it's the same thing Goodluck!
I'm not female, but what I know about the female body is that it has more erogenous zone than you can shake a stick at. Meaning, almost her entire body will have some sort of affect and effect on her. It isn't always important to touch the most sensitive spots to get her motivated.
I mean light touches on the neck. Light caress of her face. Gentle caress of her in general will help lighten things. Even cuddling or snuggling up to her could work. It really depends on what you've learned during your relationship.
*sighs* I am going to regret answering this question...
Most males think that women work like they do. For most men, that equates to going right for the goods. That is the biggest turn off in the world. (At least for me personally)
Not to be crass, but lets take the boobs... Boobies are not an erogenous zone until a women's mind lets them be one. That's why breast feeding doesn't get all weird. However, they still are likely sensitive... that equates to annoying as crap if someone starts trying to use them like radio nobs until I am in the zone.
In a vague way, the other areas (sorry, boobies are as graphic as I go) work the same way. The mind has to be there first before the body responds.
For me personally, a half an hour of conversation (not about serious or stressful stuff... strictly light topics) and cuddling generally gets me in a good frame of mind...
Groping me randomly gets hubby dirty looks and couch sleep.
Run the vacuum. Scrub the toilet. Wash the dishes. Take out the trash. Pay the bills. Do the grocery shopping. I really get excited when I see my man doing things for us around our home without me having to ask him. When these chores are through and off of my mind, that leaves room to think of other things. I'm serious. This really works.
This is very difficult, without knowing the woman in question. And I've known women who could never get turned on. It had been drilled into their heads that sex was something dirty to women.
But, find out what her idea of romance is and actively pursue it. Don't act as if it is a means to an end. Do it for romance sake. Lull her into the enjoyment of the game and work your way into sex over a period of time. Never moving to the next stage until she welcomes the advances you've incorporated into the last.
It may take time, but if it's worth the effort, it should pay off eventually.
Honestly when you're in a long term relationship or a marriage I think it's important to talk about sex. This way you learn what pleases the other and it really is a big part of the relationship. You are just going to have to patient though, there is no quick fix to something like that. Many women grow up being taught 'sex is bad' 'sex is wrong' even though what their parents most likely mean to say it that sex is something that should be saved for marriage or love, it comes out that way and stuff like that really sticks with a person. I know several females who believe that way and for a long time I was one of them. You are going to have to talk to her often and bring up these topics so she can slowly get comfortable discussing them with you. Again be extremely patient and tread lightly, don't harp on her everyday to talk about these things. Follow every single person's advice that was listed here, DO all these things for her because your actions are going to speak loudly than your words and I am assuming you love this woman and aren't just trying to have sex with her. If that is the case, then move on. If, however, you are in a relationship marriage whatever the case may be then give her time and be as honest and sincere as possible and eventually she should become more comfortable discussing it with you. Good luck.
It's in the NOT touching those sensitive parts that will drive a woman wild...it's the anticipation...tease tease tease. Talk sweet stuff, Set the mood, and drive her nuts by not touching, trust me. Have I ever lied to you?
I pushed my bf away in the same situation. It's simple: I am not in mood. I would be annoyed if he tried harder to do so. So I suggest you to get well prepared, set the mood with the aid of romantic stuff e.g. flowers, music.... And yes, you should talk to her about this.
As a woman I must say something is off with her. Most woman love the attention feeling wanted, needed and loved. I would try using techniques like showing appreciation, giving her more attention in different ways...my favorite is when my hubby will throw in my towel in the dryer after my bath or even giving me one is erotic. Sensual play is what most woman want. It's ashame she is depriving your relationship. Good luck!
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