There are so many labels and descriptions attached to the word LOVE; there is the so-called "love at first sight", "love develops", "first love never dies", "unconditional love", "true love", "love is sacrifice", "love is blind", "a long-lasting love", "forgiving love", "enduring love", "you can give without loving but you cannot love without giving" "falling in love", and a lot, lot more...but one thing is sure "Love can make or break a life whether one is aware of it or not. Love is a personal experience that marks the type of personality a person has.
People who are hurt because of unrequited love tend to suppress the hurt feelings and go on preying on what is meaningful to him/her to the point that long-lasting personal happiness evades him for the rest of his life.
The face of love may change, but love itself never does.
There is no 'true love', 'puppy love', 'familial love', 'romantic love'.
It's all love, something that goes beyond emotion. Psychologists believe that love is a combination of emotions but I believe it is not an emotion at all. That is why it is not explainable.
Here's another gem regarding love: If you love with the heart, you will lose your mind. If you love with the mind, you will lose your heart.
"That is why it is not explainable"
Yes, you are right about this statement and I like your "If you love with the heart, you will lose your mind. If you love with the mind, you will lose your heart"; It is similar to "My head is above my heart."
But this is my personal observation and I am speaking for myself. The feelings of love for the person I loved so dearly in the past had completely gone and has evolved into a higher definition. I would say, people come and go but the feelings of love remains ad is transferrable.I think that love has its own stages too.
Oh my goodness, couturepopcafe. I'm so relieved to hear you say that because the fact of the matter is, is that, you're exactly right. I wrote a Hub about love and half of it is about what you just said and I'm actually so glad you realized what I have realized!
Indeed. If it were so easy, then volumes of books would not be writtena bout it.
not once you figure out what it is! best of luck on your quest. for those inclined towards the spiritual may read in the bible suggesting God is love, God is light, scientists have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt, everything is made of light at its foundation.
frozen light in quantum physics in a search bar yield quite a bit of results. in the end, everything is love, even the "bad" stuff.
Thanks for the comment; I agree that God is love, in fact He is the Source of all Light and Love. I know the types of love that are taught in the church, I was a Bible woman and have read and studied the bible for four years, my Dad was a church Minister; The three types of love taught in the church are Eros, Philos, and Agape. Agape is the "God Love"...but non-religious people don't know or perhaps don't believe in this. The reason I raise this question is to know what most people understand about love and its mystery.
I think until you one day understand what unconditional love is, it's not such a mystery anymore. True love does exist, but very few work hard enough to find it. They settle for what they know from society and their families. Never seeking out the truth to end the mystery. Perhaps those that have been married 50 or mor years understand what its all about, and maybe a few younger ones and inbetween if they have figured out the keys to love themselves and each other.
Lucky are those who found love and nourish it. Love knows no ill and is enduring; what makes love "seemingly" mysterious is the people "in love", they fall in love in no time then fall out of love anytime. But love per see, if nurtured will last longer than the lovers.
Thanks for the comment.
Think that happens in a long term marriages you will always fall in and out of love with each other. There will be times when you don't like each other, than totally love each other, it is just learning the lessons in life, and learning move and flow together. Seeing the others perspectives. I think the problem is today the younger generations equate romance with love, and when things get hard the quit and leave. They don't stick around long enough to find out what true love is.
Exactly. Life has its turns and twists and love is put to tests. Enduring love won't even notice them. It's normal to sidetrack emotionally, we are all humans after all and we use our five senses to appreciate life; being human, we are also allowed to make mistake once in a while and that is why one of the qualities in the package called "Love" is "forgiving" and "unconditional". This can only happen when in the triangle of love "agape" is at the top. There are a lot of things to learn about ourselves if we allow love to teach us lessons in life.
Thanks for your thougts about love.
Love is a lesson, a part of life, could be a good, could be a bad, but in general it's better to experience it, then to never know what it is like to have it in the first place.
"It is better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all"; yes Aleta, I agree with you.
Thanks for the comment.
A great line but not exactly on the mark. We can never lose love or lose at love. If it is in fact love.Once again, it never goes away, doesn't change, stays the same at the core but may change on the face.
Yes, love is an energy hence we never lost it; this statement "it's better to have love and lost..." means losing the object of love (the person you love in a given time) but love finds someone else in a much higher and more meaningful sense than the previous.
Love is no Mystery to those who know what it is. Two people joining and working together to become one in their life. Instead of the World setting the conditions to your relationship you both except mutual responsibility and take on the challenge and succeed and fail together but never judge these things of the World on your relationship. Its not your career, the things you own but what you have and what you both need. You succeed together or face the challenge together. We spend way to much time apart and rate our relationships on things other then us. Its being there and succeeding together regardless of results that only matters. Life is Life and us is never them.
It is in many ways:
Example: You can find love in a place you would least expect and that's just the beginning of a lovely but mysterious journey....
Love begets love and everyone has that within each of us. If you are ready for love then Love finds a way for us even when we already had forgotten in our conscious mind that we were looking for love. Sometimes we try to look for someone to love but no matter how we try we just cannot find it; Love has its own perfect timing that is unique to each of us; this is the reason why we are sometimes caught offhanded, we are already falling in love or had fallen in love when we realize it...it's time had come...even if its in the wrong place.
Love has its own perfect timing that is unique to each of us..very well put
Thank you; Love is just within us, people or love ones come and go but love is always present within us; all we do is to acknowledge it and it will surely work for us.
Love needs mastery, mastery over emotions..especially negative ones.. otherwise it could become history.. not really a mystery, since all you need to do is love and love with absolute trust and confidence... It is a simple thing complicated by complicated people... that is my take..
Hey sofs, haven't seen you in a while. I can agree that love needs mastery over emotion. Love is not, IMO, an emotion itself though psychologists believe it is a compound emotion.
I think the real mystery of love is that we cannot explain it in words. We can feel it/experience it and who feels it knows it but there is no way to explain it to another.
Learning to love ourselves is something we can only learn if we are loved by another. Mother's love, for example. As we grow, sometimes we experience rejection and begin to see ourselves as unloveable creating the lack of ability to love others. As we grow further, and with awareness of the subject of love itself, we relearn to love ourselves perhaps because we are more open to receiving it, we notice the love that is given to us more than we notice the rejection, both of which can come from anywhere.
But like the oxygen mask on a plane, we put it on ourselves first before we can save (love) someone else.
Good to see you too couturepopcafe, I have been around.. Nah Love is not an emotion...it is an attitude.... a way of life
I agree in the mastery concept in love; but remember that love is a high voltage emotion. Emotions are very difficult to control especially when it is provoked; a little jealousy is needed to neutralize the love feeling for "drama" effect, otherwise love would be saintly and boring. it will then be martyr or sacrificial love.
Wrong, wrong, and wrong. Sorry. I'm not getting on you but love is NOT an emotion and should not be confused as one. It is above all emotion, though it may stir us greatly. If there is jealousy, then love is weak. Love is not boring but life can be. Martyrdom and sacrifice can be a result of loving. And one last word on love - you won't see grace if you won't go anywhere near it. If you think love has more to do with jealousy and drama, you haven't experienced love. Forget boyfriend love, romantic, familial, whatever 'branch' of love you want to add a label to. There is only one love. When you feel it, you'll know it.
There is the so-called "crime of passion", people in this, kill or murder because of intense and uncontrolled emotion. Jealousy is another intense emotion that can only be experienced as a consequence of loving. If love is not an emotion, would you say that it is mechanical, technical or intellectual?
Love is a force, an energy that is felt and triggers some definite action or behavior. Emotion is also a force, an energy within a person that drives him to action. The emotion may be positive or negative and the action or behavior complements the force or energy or emotion in a given moment. Love is such a strong and powerful force that drives, motivates, urges one to action, though love is only for the good of everyone concerned.
Love exists in every human being, in nature, and in all creation; nothing is made, natural or man-made that was not triggered in the first place, by a certain urge, desire, any emotion. Emotion is the vehicle to manifest and demonstrate into action or behavior and material reality what has been contemplated in the intangible and deepest sense of any person who acknowledges the presence of love within him. Love is multifaceted and surely, emotion is on its peak intensity when love is demonstrated.
Love is an unconditional sense and way of being with another. If you don't understand what I mean by that.. then you don't understand the true depth of love or the boundlessness of it's energy.
Do I agree that love is a mystery?
- Certainly Not. But perhaps to those who expect something from it, or have never found it within themselves... then it will always remain in many respects, a mystery.
- I've been totally spoiled by this sense in my life as both a Scorpio/Dragon to the extreme and a poet who writes on the sensuality of being.
The mysteries of not understanding love are for amateurs who seek conditions!
My son is also a Scorpio/Dragon; he is stubborn too but I LOVE him...if he is not my son, I will reject him...the mystery of "Mother's Love" is not amateur but of course this is an open discussion. The mystery there is Love is long-suffering and patient along with everything else for someone you truly love. If you love someone you can be the best person you yourself is even surprise; you do something to your love one that you can never do with anyone else, anyone you don't care about.
Beautifully expressed PD... The well springs of your sensual and tender poetry arises from this deep understanding of love.. Good to know someone who understands that deep way of life
Thank you Sofs... though clearly some depth is wasted on jagged rocks and shallow places!
- I feel with your answer, that you are seeking to add conditions to the very thing that I described as being an unconditional sense.
Re: your son, he is obviously a Young Scorpio/Dragon and perhaps yet to reach the plateau that I have related to. Being stubborn has nothing to do with what I was referring to.. 'being stubborn' is merely a matter of personal choice and interpretation, that from an emotional perspective, places conditions upon the other party! Being Stubborn in Love is a Selfish (and amateur) Concept!
- As I stated 'Love' (in it's Truest Sense) is an unconditional sense, that requires NO Conditions!
It doesn't matter whether you understand the depth of my understanding in regards to my vast experience.. what ultimately matters is: What Conditions you place between Yourself and Love's Acceptance of You!
- That is Why so few Do Find Perfection in their Love and Why so many Don't!
And as Sofs stated - What I have said is Very Deep and requires Depth to appreciate it! If you have ever experienced the love that I am relating to; then you will Know Exactly what I am saying!
Nobody can explain the depths and understanding of unconditional love in behalf of anyone. I know what i am talking about but I am not here to show superiority whatsoever in matters of love.
My son is young, true but I had met anyone around me as stubborn as dropping out of College at 17 because he was already a father, married at 18, a millionaire at 23. He is 34 now who owns his company as a systems analyst for a casino in Las Vegas, I am 57 but my granddaughter is already an Architecture student in Far Eastern University. Each of us has our own truth and experience in terms of the depths of Unconditional love. I am speaking my truth, the truth that works for me. I am not a poem but I create poems myself, an I am a living testimony of my statements.
We don't compare who is best in interpreting love here, each experience in love and life is his own reality.we just express our opinions as we learn to live our lives in love.
There is no such thing as amateurs in love; love has stages as growth and development in every phase of our lives. Nobody is born mature in the first place. We won't look down to toddlers because they are not adults.
I'd disagree with the idea that there are not different types of love. I once read a really well done (and scientific) analysis of the different types of love and the common elements each type has, but also the elements that are exclusive to one or another type. Personally, I've experienced some of the different types of love too. (I'd include the name of the author and book, but it was years ago. I've tried to find the book since, and I can't, but I may not have the spelling of her name correct at this point.)
The analysis of love pointed out that there are two things that are always present in any of the types of love, and those two things are respect for, and admiration of, the other person. The author pointed out that if one or neither of those elements is missing the love isn't whole. I, personally, would add that the respect for the other person also has to be complete and whole. It isn't enough to respect someone for one thing that s/he is but only that. Respecting someone "because she's a good mother" or "because she's so successful in her career" isn't enough.
Having said that, do I think love is a mystery?
Sometimes no, not at all. Sometimes, maybe. Sometimes a little bit.
Different authors have their own explanation of what love is but what is absolute is the experience of love in the personal level. The religious people would classify love into three, Eros, Philos, and Agape. The highest form of love is Agape, Philos is substantial and Eros is fallible or erotic. Thse so-called "Love triangle" or triumvirate or trinity is the "Perfect love has no man". .
Only God can perfect and impute love to humanity. If you are not religious then you may attribute that to Spiritually or the mystic Supernatural.
Lisa, interesting take and with some validity, IMO. But I don't believe scientists can explain this phenomenon any more than you or I can.
Psychologists believe that love is not one of the primary emotions but a combination of emotions. I don't agree with that either. I believe that love is not an emotion at all. It's in a class by itself and completely unexplainable. We try to put words on it to describe it but all we can do is describe the feeling we get from it, not the thing itself.
So I still have to say attaining love is not the mystery. The only mystery is that it can't definitively be put into words.
The love of God to us can never be a mystery,the love a mother has for her child would never be mystery but I think only the love that exist in romace could only be mysterious sometimes because of the way we go about it.
When I say "mystery", it means that we cannot theorize our feelings and we cannot give a concrete ans to the question "Why do you love me?" or "Why do I love you?" In the context of your answer let me ask you "Why does lo God love us?" and are we lovable enough to a Perfect God? Likewise with the mother Why does she love her child even if for others that child is not lovable for some reason?
most of people on the planet have not sat down and thought out what love is. it is all things. the duality of its nature baffles us, myself included. (used to anyway) there are two equal sides to anything and everything, period. it is all love. if God is love, and God is light, everything in our universe is made from light at its smallest basis. it is the foundation of life, and of course, is life. seeing it for what it is as it is, is our journey to find love in its form for each of us.
"for those that have eyes to see"...
once a person gets a glimpse of love, your heart will open and all you can say is "thank you God, i love you".
it can turn a tragedy into a triumph. the greater seed of adversity inside all of us that can grow into a blossom of strength.
It is important to be loved. I have learned you actually do not need to be loved by lots of people even if it is just one person, it keeps you going, well me going anyway, We seems to need love, or to be loved.,
Love is a force that keeps us going, no matter how you define the word (love, is a personal conviction). It is something your psyche is convinced you are in it, I mean...you are loved, and you are capable of loving....without this sensed feeling of love, we all will just be like robots.
I so much agree with that jynzly, love is a beautiful thing and when you are in love with the right person is just the starting of man's existence.
Exactly pharuk, how many of us would say "I just exist", his statement is an outcry from the psyche who has "no life" no inspiration, no driving force, and nothing can compare the intensity of the driving force called "love"...however one defines or perceives it.
Jynzly, you know sometimes I wonder what life would be if there is nothing like "love"there won't be you, me or anyone on earth because adam and Eve wouldn't have come together as one that brought about the existence of us. Love is life without love there is no life, a little bit of love is useful more than millions of hatred. True love is as soft as a sheet of paper yet very hard to be cut by any cutting object
lovely comments there, i like your last line. I am sure i read somewhere God Is Love.
Joy56, "God is Love"...that's an equation, God=Love, rather than a definition. This is the "mystery". We cannot explain or define God just as we cannot define Love; we can only experience it and any one who has that love working in his/her life is filled with an energy that invites only good into his/her life. God as Love working our lives begets another type of love in human definition which shows the person loving his/her "neighbors as himself" as well as another type of love in "lovers" definition in a marriage relationship. When this "love triangle" is completed in a person's life then what else could be perfect? He will have everything his heart desires. That vacuum of every human would filled. There would be no feeling of "emptiness."
thanks friend s for the sharing the some lovely thought and wonder full conversation thans for the news
Love is a mystery to the un-initiated among us. To those who have not found it. Or the people who seek love but can't find it or can't make it last. Love can definitely be a mystery and confusing, like turning on a hot water tap but getting cold water.
But Love can be a joy and a dream come true when it happens. When I met my partner I learned a lot from that relationship and that helpful knowledge broadened my understanding. Having a kind and loving person who enlightens us can make all the difference.
Some part of the mystery comes from fear and of wanting some things but not being brave enough to follow through on things. I have learned so much from that.
I wish you joy and contentment in finding love. Everything is a mystery until we learn. And look at all the things you can learn... loving is no different.
Love is like being in no-man's land. It doesn't have a true identity, and you live in an undefined world. It's the best feeling when you have it - whether it's with a partner, child etc.
oo realy fairy thanks a lot for this news
Love is the inclusion that results from significantly appreciating another people advantages.
show but u think
Love is not a mystery ..... love is in happiness with which world sees you .....
Sometimes the person you love most is the person you hate most.
my love, my friend, check out my new hub regarding tarsiers... i tried to call you yesterday.
It's my bday today and I will be spending it with the dogs, the cat, and the husband.
Happy Birhday Ma'am Veron. I thought you were in Baguio, Jean said you will spend your birthday there. I will visit you later at 5:00, I had just gone to my lawyer.
Yes I saw in the notification about your new hub, had read yet, I kept away from hub for a day...
You're right, the more you love, the more you hate...and vice versa..
It's a personal thing whether love is a mystery or not and depending how you define mystery and love.
For me what makes love a mystery is its power to make one look blooming and beautiful when in love...
Got to take the dogs to the park. will be out for 2 hours, then do the laundry, bathe the dogs, clean the house. Am not sure if i still have energy for dinner, but could have dinner with us?
sa holiday land tayo. Same ambiance with bale capampangan kasi pareho lang ang may ari. meron na go signal kay mister, we have dinner date tayo lang dalawa.
YES, what time.
My treat...I go to your place at 6:00 or so.
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