HOW TO SATISFY WOMAN YOU LOVE ?

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I have very frequently read or heard from guys that men have no clue what women expect from them, because we usually express ourselves on diplomatic way so men have to read between lines (men hate to read between the lines) or even worse - we do not say it at all and expect that men guess our thoughts and wishes.

So if we need to say it clearly, what we really want from permanent relationship and commitment ?

Let me start with the fact that we do want a lot, sometimes too much. Sometimes we want that man to whom we are in love with completely changes his nature, "in the name of love", what is often impossible. But men also often want too much from us, so if relationship does not work, nobody is innocent.

Why I paraphrased here 10 commandnets to explain what women want? Well, if there are commandments, it means this is the Law, if the Law is clearly written nobody can say that "he did not understand what he is supposed to do ". Hehe, the Law needs to be obeyed... or not....

.BTW, this Hub is satiric one, so please do not take everything too serious!

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Commandments for men

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I am your girlfriend or wife, your Goddess, who brought you out of the misery of your previous life, out of the house of loneliness and thou shall have no other Gods or Goddesses before me.

  • Thou shall not make for yourself an idol, whether in the form of pub, or casino, or footbal, or TV or video game, or online pornography or anything that is in heaven above, or that is on the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.
  • Thou shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I your Goddess am a jealous Goddess, never forgetting to those who reject me, but showing steadfast love to those who love me and keep my commandments.
  • Thou shall not make wrongful use of the name of the Goddess, for She will not acquit anyone who misuses her name.
  • Respect your father and your mother, but thou shall remember that your women is on the first place, so that your days may be long and that it may go well with you in the life that your Goddess is giving you.
  • Thou shall not expect to find the things as thou hast at your parentś home for thou hast left thy previous home behind to experience new and different things.
  • Thou shall grow up and understand that your childhood is over.
  • Observe time spent together with your Goddess and keep it holy. Whenever needed you shall labour and do all your work, earn money and bring it home. But whenever your Goddess needs romance you shall not do any work so that you can have romantic time together with your Goddess.

  • Thou shall not bear false witness against your wife or girlfriend, neither shall you lie to her. Remember that you were slave in your life and your Goddess set you free with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm, therefore the Goddess commanded you not to lie.

  • Thou shall develop high level of communication skills.

  • Thou shall not commit adultery - neither in your life nor in your mind
  • Neither shall you covet your neighbor’s wife. Thou shall not forget that in this world, every man is your neighbour.

ANEX:

Thou shall also understand that if you always blindly obey these Commandments your Goddess will not find you amusing any more. So thou shall always act wisely and never become slave of these commandments.

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Girls, do never forgett: if you command, your man might obey, but sooner or later he will run away

Moses destroying 10 commandemnts
Moses destroying 10 commandemnts

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Dear guys, please forgive me for cruelty expressed in those commandments, do not forget that original, which I paraphrased , was written by men (Moses and Co.).

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BTW, women who will agree with these commandments, have also need to understand the following: if you command, your man must obey - but sooner or later - HE WILL RUN AWAY. Nobody can stand the slavery.

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At the end, COOPERATION is always the best... and only one that can work. Advice for the both sides is - cooperate and communicate, commandments did not bring us anywhere, no matter which gender was/is "in charge".

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Comments 30 comments

dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York

Yes, these Commandments should work for both sides! It makes perfect sense for both men and women to take notice of such Commandments. I liked this one probably the most:

Thou shall grow up and understand that your childhood is over.

Playtime is over! Loved it. Thanks, Tatjana-Mihaela. You made some really great points here.


poetlorraine 7 years ago

very well thought out hub lots of fun, with a bit of a lesson for us, well done, enjoyed it a lot..


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

He, he Dohn, I also said to the women: if you command, your man must obey - but sooner or later - HE WILL RUN AWAY...

Thanks for the visit and comment.


Green Lotus profile image

Green Lotus 7 years ago from Atlanta, GA

Well, aside from the Football (Soccer) god he worships, I say that surprisingly, my guy is pretty observant of your modern day commandments. I loved everything you wrote, although I think men do have a tough time realizing playtime is over - but that's ok too. Who wants a serious old fart anyway?


rogerdv profile image

rogerdv 7 years ago

Women are easy to underestand! They want a lot of sex, but not too much. They want you to there for them, but also they need their space. They want you to be caressing, but not so much to suffocate them. they are not interested in your money (sometimes...) but they expect that you take care of their expenses, make them gifts (aniversary, birthday, mother in law birthday...). Arent they easy to underestand?


rogerdv profile image

rogerdv 7 years ago

Women are easy to underestand! They want a lot of sex, but not too much. They want you to there for them, but also they need their space. They want you to be caressing, but not so much to suffocate them. they are not interested in your money (sometimes...) but they expect that you take care of their expenses, make them gifts (aniversary, birthday, mother in law birthday...). Arent they easy to underestand?


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Thank you very much, Poetlorraine.


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Yes Green Lotus, I could not agree more with you, too serious guys are - boring. Thanks for visit and comment


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Hahaha, Rogerdv, that is one of the reasons, why I paraphrased 10 commandments.... BTW...I agree with you - it is not easy to understand women.


H P Roychoudhury profile image

H P Roychoudhury 7 years ago from Guwahati, India

Yes you are right, no Commandments are required but commitment in field work is essential to restore love for each other. Thanks for presenting such a thoughtful hub. Thanks once again Tatjana.


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Well I do not believe in commandments, HPR, I believe in common sense. I used commandments just to show people how desires can sound bad if expressed as commandments...and see how people would react if I do not directly tell them that this is satire.

Thank you for visit and comment.


Mortgagestar1 profile image

Mortgagestar1 7 years ago from Weirton,West Virginia

Check out " The Promise Keepers " What woman wouldn't want this?


Craig Suits profile image

Craig Suits 7 years ago from Florida

Well I'm happy to hear you don't believe in the Ten Commandments. I don't either. George Carlin, a very famous American comedian did a piece on the Commandments where he reduced them down to just two. Very funny stuff but his language is a little rough. If you wish, I'll email you a copy. Let me know...

Ok, down to business...

At 68, I've earned an honorary PHD in "Understanding Women" and have come to certain conclusions that are simple but nessasary to learn in order to keep from loosing it on your way up to becoming my age.

This is just for the guys in your audience...

First and most important is that you understand that all human women on earth, big one's, little one's, fat one's, skinny one's, young ones, old one's, stupid ones, smart one's, pretty one's and ugly one's, are all unequivably and certifiably insane and that attempting to understand any one of them is similar to you or I reading the first page of an advanced book on nuclear fusion. Forget about it! i.e. "What's the matter dear? Why are you crying"?..."I don't know"...

That said, the rest is always a crap game but if you follow these rules, you'll stand a much better chance of having a long and lasting relationship with the girl of your dreams.

One of the more useful of our religious one liner's is: "Do onto others as you would have then do onto you". Now if you can modify that to become a daily effort in respect to your loved one, you'll be home free.

Get involved in "her" world, share her likes and dislikes as if they were yours, treat her with equality, respect, and gentleness. Make her the most important thing in your life and do it everyday. After all, she is isn't she? Give her all the love you have to offer in every respect and every day without missing a trick and then double the effort. A little baby powder on a hot day, a birthday cake you made yourself just for her, you know what I mean. And keep yourself in shape, she didn't fall in love with a baby grand piano at the beginning did she?

Follow these simple guidelines that you will enjoy as much as she does if you love her and expect nothing in return. In the event you've done your job well, she will respond with the same care and concern you give her on a daily basis. Mutual trust is the most important goal you must strive for. Without trust, there's nothing.

If it doesn't work out, at least you know you've done the right thing so dump the creep and go find another one with bigger boobs and the hell with what I just said...

Hang in there...


momof3inNNH09 profile image

momof3inNNH09 7 years ago

Wow, that was awesome. You really put it out there. I love it.


donotfear profile image

donotfear 7 years ago from The Boondocks

I like this!


wsp2469 profile image

wsp2469 7 years ago from Alta Loma, Ca

This is funny but I just might have to write a male response! (You're cute, too!)


dragoshs profile image

dragoshs 7 years ago from Uk and Romania

The name of pa


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Dear Hubbers, thank you all for the visit and comments. Will respond on specific questions later on. So glad you enjoyed in my Hub.


shinujohn2008 7 years ago

great commandments for making a loving family


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 6 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Hahaha, you can imagine!

Thank for the vist and comment.


myownworld profile image

myownworld 6 years ago from uk

what a fantastic hub! Insightful...and witty at the same time! I agree with every word...thanks for sharing it.


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 6 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Thank you very much, MOW, I am glad to see you here.


ralwus 6 years ago

LOL I love this Tatjana. So funny! You remind me of my Aphrodite and her red hair now with your commandments. I don't always obey her either. Great hub and Merry Christmas to you darlin'.


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 6 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Thank you so much, CC....You do not need to obey, is better to - cooperate, he, he...

A lots of love to you ...and very Merry Christmass to you and your family.


rockyhenry 6 years ago

i like dis


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 6 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Thanks, Henry.


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 6 years ago

Very, very nice. Thanks for the beautiful insight.


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 6 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Thank you, MD.


DREAM ON profile image

DREAM ON 6 years ago

That is all there is to making her happy!That's a piece of cake.Only if she gets the first piece.


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 6 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA Author

Thank you very much for your comment DO.

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