Are You There God?
Seriously, are you there, God? I'd really like to know. I've wrestled with this question for years, and cannot come up with a definitive answer - I do know that I'm not alone with this. But I also know that the people that "believe" will tell me that it's "faith"...that's all it takes. Now, I would absolutely like to have that kind of unwavering faith - the kind that so many people claim to have. But how? In response to this, I've been told to study the Bible. I will tell you, that when I've been very sick, or beside myself with grief, I've almost always turned to prayer. Why do I do this? Desperation? Fear? A cultural habit? A sign from God? Who knows!
If God does exist, why must he be such a big mystery? Why doesn't he just show himself so that everyone knows without a shadow of a doubt? It seems to me that would solve a bunch of problems. Religion has been such a dividing factor between people. Just think for a moment about the holy wars. If God is all knowing, and all seeing, wouldn't he want to eliminate some of that? Why does he have to wait for us to come to him? I know that I'm going to hear from people that he did show himself - he sent Jesus and Jesus died for our sins. But what about now? Wouldn't so many problems be eliminated if he would just show himself now? Wouldn't God want to eliminate those problems that stem from religion? Wouldn't he want to show himself as the true God...the only God? Why, I ask, would he even have a desire to "test" our faith? What would the creator of man have to gain from that? Doesn't that short of test stem from insecurity? I'm asking again...why the big mystery?
Another thing I've read, but can't seem to get my head around, is the notion that God chooses only a handful of us. Now why in world would God create all of us, only to choose some us to be with him in heaven? That would be like having four children and only choosing to take care of two of them. Does that make any rational sense? I know that the argument is probably that it doesn't have to make sense, but why shouldn't it?
In spite of all of my questions and all of my doubts, when I am at my lowest, that's where I turn. I turn to that very same God that I can't see, or hear. I pray that he's listening to me and can make everything all better. I pray that he actually does exist, so that when I'm my loneliest, I'm really not alone at all.
I would love to hear from people from all different cultures and religions, all over the world. Please...educate me!