UNDERSTANDING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP...TRUTH IS...(PART 2)

NOW KNOWING THAT GOD CAN EFFECT YOUR RELATIONSHIP IN A POSITIVE WAY IT'S TIME TO CONSIDER HOW TO APPLY HIS PRINCIPLES TO THE WAY THAT WE MANAGE OUR RELATIONSHIP.TRUTH IS...

Does any of this sound familiar?: "I had this man/woman as a friend long before i met you and I'm going to keep them as a friend"; 'That's the way I have always done this and the way that has worked best for me";"I love you but I don't want to be bothered with your family"; my sister and I talk on the phone for hours everyday, we always did";"My boys and me always hang-out like that"; "That's where i like to go when I go out, as long as I come home to you what's the problem?"...There's many more, you know a few...

THESE ARE BUT A FEW OF THE ENEMIES OF "UNDERSTANDING" IN A RELATIONSHIP. THE FIRST THING TO UNDERSTAND IS THAT YOU ARE NOT ALONE ANY MORE. THERE IS SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE, AND HOW/WHAT THEY THINK, FEEL, AND SAY MATTERS! WHAT WORKED FOR YOU IN THE PAST IN MOST CASES WILL NOT WORK FOR YOU NOW THAT YOU'RE INVOLVED WITH A PARTNER IN YOUR LIFE. IF YOU ARE SPIRIT-LED OR CHRISTIAN BY REFERENCE, THEN YOU MJST KNOW THAT THE THIINGS FORMERLY PRESENT IN YOUR LIFE ARE THINGS GOD ALLOWED AS THEY WERE NECCESARY TO EASE YOUR WAY. BUT YOU PRAYED AND GOD ANSWERED, YOU'RE NOT ALONE ANY MORE! NOW HE HAS PROVIDED A NEW WAY TO MANAGE YOUR LIFE AND WHATEVER BESETS YOU. JUST AS EACH MIRACLE HE PERFORMED IN THE WILDERNESS WAS NEW AND DIFFERENT, AND SUBSEQUENT METHODS OF DELIVERENCE THROUGHOUT THE BIBLE WERE DIFFERENT, HE PROVIDES DIFFERENT WAYS TO GET YOU THROUGH; JUST REMEMBER THAT HE STAYS THE SAME IN ONLY ONE LIGHT: HE CONTINUES TO MAKE A WAY.

THIS IS A MATTER OF YOUR FAITH AND HOW YOU CULTIVATE IT. DO YOU TRUST GOD? IF YOUR ANSWER WAS "YES", THEN YOU KNOW WITH CONVICTION THAT WHATEVER YOU GIVE UP TO PLEASE HIM WILL BE REPLACED TEN-FOLD...A HUNDRED FOLD! JUST THINK, WHEN EVE CAME TO ADAM AFTER ALREADY PARTAKING OF THE FRUIT, IF ADAM WOULD HAVE HAD FAITH IN GOD TO REPLACE HER, CENTURIES OF HUMAN SUFFERING AND IMPERFECTION WOULD/COULD HAVE BEEN AVERTED! FAITH: WHEN YOU KNOW GOD WILL FIX IT SO THAT YOU'RE NOT UNHAPPY OR SUFFERING SO MUCH THAT YOU JUST CAN'T TAKE IT. IS THERE ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE, ANY PERSON, HABIT, ADDIICTION, BEHAVIOR, BAR OR CLUB THAT YOU REALLY CAN'T L-I-V-E WITHOUT? ARE THOSE THINGS REALLY THAT IMPORTANT THAT THEY ARE WORTH LOSING OR DAMAGING YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR MATE...AND GOD OVER?

WHY DO I MENTION YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD? WELL, FOR ONE, IF YOUR MATE IS ALSO GOD LED, THEN BY BEING STUBBORN, SELFISH, OR SELF-SERVING, YOU MAY TRULY INJURE THEM SPIRITUALLY, EMOTIONALLY AND OTHERWISE NEGATIVELY. IN GOD'S WORD WE'RE TOLD THAT TO MESS WITH ONE OF HIS IS LIKE POKING YOUR FINGER IN HIS EYE. REMEMBER, YOUR ARMS ARE TOO SHORT TO BOX WITH GOD, SO WHY WOULD YOU BE STUPID ENOUGH TO POKE HIM IN THE EYE?!!! ADDITIONALLY, THE BIBLE SAYS THAT YOUR WORSHIP AND THEREBY YOUR BLESSING(S) CAN BE EFFECTED BY YOUR INTER -ACTION WITH OTHERS. MATYTHEW 5:23,24 SAYS TO LEAVE YOUR OFFERING AT THE ALTAR AND GO SETTLE THINGS BEFORE YOU EVEN TRY TO GIVE GOD ANY OF YOUR TIME. NOW HERE HE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOUR "BROTHER", JUST THINK HOW HE FEELS ABOUT YOUR MATE WHEN IT WAS HIM WHO INVENTED MARRIAGE(JOINING OF MALE AND FEMALE) IN THE FIRST PLACE AND THROUGHOUT THE BIBLE SPEAKS OF HOW SACRED THAT ARRANGEMENT IS TO HIM. NOW YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT THE BEST AND ONLY THING THAT YOU CAN GIVE GOD IS YOUR WORSHIP AND, FAITH, AND PRAISE. BUT IF YOU CAN'T RESIDE PEACEFULLY WITH NOT ONLY YOUR NEIGHBORS AND FELLOW MEN, BUT IN PARTICULAR YOUR MATE, GOD DOESN'T EVEN ACCEPT OR WANT YOUR WORSHIP, PRAISE, OR ANYTHING ELSE UNTIL YOU ADDRESS IT. THAT IS BECAUSE HE EXPLAINS IN HIS WORD THAT HE CANNOT AND WILL NOT POUR SOMETHING CLEAN INTO THAT WHICH IS DIRTY. WE WANT THE CLEANSING POWER AND RICHNESS OF GOD'S SPIRIT ACTIVELY WORKING FIRST WITHIN US DO WE NOT? HOW COULD THAT BE THE CASE IF WE HOLD ON TO THINGS THAT ARE NOT OF HIS SPIRIT AND ARE THEREBY DIRTY? RESENTMENT, OBSTINANCE, STUBBORNESS, SELFISHNESS, SELF-SERVING BIAS. IF IT IS NOT OF GOD WE KNOW WHO IT IS FROM DO WE NOT?

DON'T JUST CLEAN-UP YOUR ACT, TAKE YOUR ATTITUDE TO THE LAUNDRY TOO! IF GOD HAS BLESSED YOU WITH SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE, YOU HAVE TO REALIZE THAT THEY ALSO ARE HUMAN BEINGS THAT HAVE FEELINGS, WANTS, DESIRES, LIKES AND DISLIKES TOO. YOU DEFINITELY WANT AND INSIST THEY CHANGE OR GET RID OF THINGS FROM THEIR LIFE(PAST) THAT YOU DON'T APPROVE OF, DON'T FOOL YOURSELF TO THINK THEY DON'T EXPECT THE SAME THING IN RETURN! EVEN IF THEY DON'T SAY ANYTHING WHEN YOU INSIST ON HOLDING-ON TO THE THINGS FROM YOUR FORMER LIFE THAT THEY FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE WITH, YOU BETTER BELIEVE THE Y ARE TELLING THEIRSELVES ABOUT IT. UNDERSTAND THIS WELL: IF YOU LOSE SOMEONE "EMOTIONALLY" YOU RARELY CAN GET THEM BACK THE SAME WAY THAT YOU FORMERLY HAD THEM. EMOTIONAL SCARS ARE THE HARDEST TO HEAL AND OFTEN NEVER DO.

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

SOMETIMES IT'S SIMPLY NOT ENOUGH TO ASK:"WHAT WOULD JESUS DO" OR CALL ON ANY OTHER "CATCHY PHRASE" USED TO SOUND RIGHTEOUS. JESUS HIMSELF SAID AT MATTHEW 7:21-23 THAT YOU HAVE TO DO THE WILL OF HIS FATHER WHO IS IN HEAVEN. THE ONLY WAY THAT YOU CAN DO THAT IS TO FOLLOW THE SOUND ADVICE GIVEN IN PART ONE OF THIS DISCUSSION CITED AT PROVERBS 3:5,6 AND "TAKE NOTICE OF HIM IN ALL MATTERS". A LOT OF US HAVE LEARNED THAT WE CAN ACTUALLY PRAY FOR GOD TO HELP US SLEEP, DIET AND SOME OF EVERYTHING ELSE. DOESN'T IT MAKE SENSE THAT WE CAN DO SO WHEN IT COMES TO ADAPTING OR ADJUSTING TO HAVING THE BLESSING OF SOMEONE TO SHARE OUR LIFE WITH? I ONCE KNEW A MAN WHO ATTENDED MY BIBLE CLASS WITH REGULARITY. EVENTUALLY IT DAWNED ON HIM THAT IN ORDER TO PLEASE GOD, HE HAD TO CHANGE. HIS EXACT REACTION WAS:"YOU MEAN I HAVE TO CHANGE? NO, I CAN'T DO THAT!". SADLY HE DIDN'T AND HIS LIFE CONTINUED IT'S DOWNWARD SPIRAL, AND INSTEAD OF THE RICH BLESSING OF GOD'S SPIRIT FLOWING FREELY IN HIS LIFE, ALL HE HAD WAS THE ATTITUDE ABOUT HIMSELF TO HOLD ON TO. NEEDLESS TO SAY HE DID NOT PROSPER. WHEN I SAY PROSPER, UNLIKE PASTOR OR REVEREND SO-AN-SO, I WON'T LIE TO YOU AND SAY GOD WANTS YOU TO BE RICH. (ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS PAY BIG TITHES ETC), NO I'M NOT HERE TO TICKLE YOUR EARS WITH THAT OLD TIME RELIGION. (2 TIMOTHY 4:3) YOU NEED TO KNOW THAT THE TRUEST PROSPERITY AVAILABLE TO US IN THE IMPERFECT WORLD IN WHICH WE LIVE IS TO HAVE AN ACTIVE AND ON-GOING RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD WHO WILL HELP US NAVIGATE THROUGH THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS FOUND IN LIFE AND COME OUT OF IT PLEASING TO HIM AND THEREBY ELIGIBLE FOR THE ULTIMATE REWARD: ETERNAL LIFE. THINK ABOUT IT, IF GOD GAVE YOU ALL THE MONEY AND MATERIAL THINGS YOU WANT WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE TO HOPE FOR? IF THE MEEK ARE TO INHERIT THE EARTH AND THAT IS WHAT HE INITIALLY INTENDED WHEN HE SAID BE FRUITFUL AND FILL THE EARTH, AND YOU KNOW WHAT GOD PURPOSES W-I-L-L BE, WHAT ELSE EXACTLY ARE YOU LOOKING/HOPING FOR AS REWARD FOR YOUR FAITHFUL SERVICE?

NO AMOUNT OF TITHES AND OFFERINGS, OR CHURCH ATTENDENCE AND ACTIVITIES CAN GAIN YOU A DAY OF SALVATION IF YOUR ATTITUDE AND BEHAVIOR ARE NOT ALIGNED WITH THAT OF GOD. THAT IS SOMETHING TO REALLY CONSIDER WHEN DEALING WITH YOUR MATE. WHEN WE APPROACH GOD HE ACTS WITH LOVE AND UNDERSTANDING AND CONTINUES THE RELATIONSHIP IN SPITE OF OURSELVES DOES HE NOT? OK, THERE'S YOUR MATE, YOUR BLESSING SITTING IN THE OTHER ROOM BECAUSE YOU TWO HAVE ARGUED AND ONE OR BOTH OF YOU WERE STUBBORNLY TRYING TO MAKE YOUR POINT INSTEAD OF FINDING A NEW PATH TO TRAVEL TOGETHER, A SMOOTHER ROUTE, ONE PAVED WITH UNDERSTANDING...LOVE, GOD'S LOVE(YOU KNOW THE REAL KIND,NOT KIND OF REAL).

WHEN YOU FORM A RELATIONSHIP, IT'S CRUCIAL TO HAVE THE MIND-SET THAT THERE ARE TWO DISTINCT(DIFFERENT) PERSONALITIES, ATTITUDES, THOUGHT-PROCESSES INVOLVED. THEY ONLY WWAY TO SUCCESSFULLY SUSTAIN(PERPETUATE...KEEP GOING INDEFINITELY) IS TO TAKE THOSE TWO DIFFERENT PERSONALITIES ETC. AND FORM A TOTALLY NEW ONE. THAT'S THE BEAUTY OF IT ALL IF YOU REALLY LOOK AT IT. EVEN IF YOU CAN'T CONCEIVE A CHILD, YOU TWO TOGETHER CAN GIVE BIRTH TO SOMETHING TOATALLY NEW, A NEW CREATION AS IT WERE...A NEW SOURCE OF BRINGING PRAISE TO GOD AND JOY IN HEAVEN! WHAT A MARVELOUS OPPORTUNITY AND PRIVILAGE THAT IS! TRULY, DOES GOD NOT REWARD HIS CHILDREN WHO SEEK TO PLEASE HIM? FAITH! STANDING ON FAITH MEANS TALKING TO GOD AND WILLINGLY ACCEPTING THE CHANGES THAT YOU HAVE TO MAKE IN HOW YOU DO THINGS NOW THAT HE HAS BLESSED YOU WITH A MATE. IF YOU CAN'T PUT IN THE WORK THEN DON'T TAKE THE JOB...YOU'LL GET FIRED. PLUS YOU'LL HAVE BAD REFERENCES WHEN YOU GO CRYING TO GOD TO LET YOU TRY IT AGAIN. THERE'S A LOT OF SINGLE MEN AND WOMEN WHO CAN IDENTIFY WITH THAT...THEY'RE AGING EVEN AS YOU READ THIS AND THEY STILL HAVEN'T GOT SOMEONE IN THEIR LIFE AFTER BLOWING IT THE FIRST TIME(OR TWO).

ANOTHER KEY, AND MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL ACTUALLY; IS PRAYER. PRAYER IS THE MOST POTENT AND POWERFUL TOOL THAT WE HAVE AVAIALBLE. IT'S HOW WE CALL OUR BACK-UP. HOW OFTEN DO YOU AND YOUR MATE PRAY TOGETHER? PRAYING TOGETHER PROMOTES "ONENESS", A ONENESS OF SPIRIT, INTENTION, GOAL(S), AND PURPOSE. iT ALSO PROMOTES A ONENESS WITH GOD AND BETTER OPENS THE OPPORTUNITY TO GET THE SAME ANSWER(EVEN IF NOT AT THE SAME TIME). FOOD FOR THOUGHT. REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOU MAY THINK, YOUR ACTIONS AND THE WAY THAT YOU DEAL WITH YOUR MATE IS AN INTEGRAL PART OF YOUR WORSHIP AND YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD. IF YOU ARE SELFISH AND SELF-PROMOTING, OR SELF-SERVING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP, THAT INDICATES ARROGANCE. iIF YOU HAVE AN ARROGANCE ABOUT YOU, HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY "HUMBLE YOURSELF UNDER THE MIGHTY HAND OFGOD"? REMEMBER HE KNOWS THE TRUTH WHETHER YOU CONFESS IT OR NOT; DON'T THINK HE'S NOT GOING TO DEAL WITH YOU ACCORDINGLY. HE MAY ALLOW A MESASURE OF BLESSING BECAUSE YES, HE DOES KNOW YOUR HEART. BUT THERE IS SO MUCH THAT YOU CAN AND WILL MISS-OUT ON IF YOU JUST CAN'T ALLOW THE FREE-FLOW OF GOD'S SPIRIT IN YOUR LIFE DUE TO SERVING YOURSELF AND SELFISH FEELINGS.

PROMOTING AND UNDERSTANDING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS N-O-T GETTING YOUR MATE TO ACCEPT THINGS YOU TELL THEM ARE NOT GOING TO CHANGE. NO, RATHER, PROMOTING UNDERSTANDING IS LOOKING AT THOSE THINGS WE DON'T WANT TO CHANGE BECAUSE USUALLY THEY A-R-E THE VERY THINGS YOU NEED TO CHANGE TO BETTER SERVE GOD. JUST AS HIS BLESSINGS ARE EVER-EVOLVING AND GROWING, SO SHOULD YOU BE! EVERY PERSON MENTIONED IN THE BIBLE WHO GAINED MUCH IN GOD HAD TO GIVE UP MUCH IN ORDER TO SHOW THEIR FAITH. IF YOU KNOW THAT THE WALK TOWARD SALVATION IS NOT AN EASY ONE, THAT IT TAKES ENDURANCE, HARD WORK AND PERSEVERANCE, DON'T YOU ALSO REALIZE THAT CONDUCTING A RELATIONSHIP IS THE SAME? READ HEBREWS 12:1-3 AND UNDERSTAND THAT YOU HAVE TO LET GO OF THAT WHICH YOU HOLD DEAREST IN ORDER TO RECEIVE FULLY THAT WHICH IS BEST. NO MATTER WHAT YOU OWN, YOUR ATTITUDE IS THE ONLY THING THAT CAN'T BE STOLEN OR TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU. BECAUSE OF THAT TRUTH, MAINTAINING A GOOD ATTITUDE BEFORE GOD IS CRUCIAL. IT ALSO DRAWS THE RIGHT TYPE OF PEOPLE TO YOU, INCLUDING A MATE OR LIFE'S PARTNER.

THAT'S WHAT YOUR MATE IS, YOUR LIFE'S PARTNER. THEY ARE THE ONE INDIVIDUAL WHO COMMITS TO YOUR HAPPINESS, YOUR STRUGGLES, YOUR VICTORIES AND YOUR DEFEATS FOR THE REMAINDER OF THEIR EXISTENCE. AT LEAST YOU CAN HAVE IT THAT WAY IF YOU PROMOTE UNDERSTANDING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP. TRUTH IS...

*YES, THERE WILL BE A PART THREE!

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING,

TRUTH IS...